A/N: This story is a response to a challenge from As the Stargate Turns. The challenge was to write a story including the word "pollute" and/or the phrase "don't argue with an idiot; people watching may not be able to tell the difference." This story includes both, and is my first attempt at responding to a story challenge. Hope you like it!

Better

General Jack O'Neill was having a crappy day. That much was certain. A very crappy day.

Although, come to think of it, his day hadn't actually started out too badly. As a matter of fact, it had started out quite well. First, SG-1 had arrived home from their latest mission safe and sound. That was always a relief. And after that came the debriefing. And while that meant listening to Carter and Daniel rattle on about their scientific discoveries, it also meant that Jack got to spend some time with his team. Not to mention the fact that Carter giving a prolonged explanation of her new findings meant that Jack had a perfectly good excuse to keep his eyes on her for an extended period of time. And since Carter-watching was one of his favourite pastimes, he wasn't about to complain.

Yes, all in all, his day hadn't started out badly at all.

Then Major Spatzwick arrived from the Pentagon. And that's when things went from good to crappy. Spatzwick (or Major Spaz, as Jack liked to think of him... when he had to think of him) had his head so far up his ass that Jack had to wonder if he'd ever seen the light of day. He'd arrived at the base like a bad smell, come to pollute the previously pleasant atmosphere with his hot air and griping.

And to make matters worse, the guy had yattered on so long that Jack's stomach had been growling fiercely at him for lunch for well over an hour. So now Jack was not only thoroughly irritated, he was also hungry. And being hungry made him... even more irritated.

Finally free of Major Spaz, Jack was now making his way through the corridors toward the commissary. And that's when he came upon Dr. Lee arguing with another Egghead in the middle of the hallway.

Great, Jack thought. Just what I need -- riled up Eggheads.

"Boys, what's the problem?" Jack asked. Not that he really wanted to know. But they were standing between him and the commissary. Between him and food.

The two scientists abruptly stopped arguing when they became aware of Jack's presence, but they continued to glare coldly at each other.

"No problem, General," Dr. Lee's associate (what the hell was his name again?) managed to reply through clenched teeth.

Jack raised his eyebrows and looked questioningly at Dr. Lee.

"Just a slight professional disagreement, General," Dr. Lee said evenly, although it was obvious that he was still struggling to compose himself. "Nothing serious."

"Good!" Jack said with rather sarcastic enthusiasm. "Then there's no need for you to block the corridor any longer."

Egghead Number Two shot one last glare in Dr. Lee's direction before walking off, mumbling, "I'll be in the lab."

One down, one to go, Jack thought.

Now that his associate was gone, Dr. Lee was fuming again. "Some of his ideas are just preposterous! I mean, really! He --"

Jack put a hand on his shoulder, cutting off his tirade. "I'll give you a piece of advice, Doctor," Jack told him. "Don't argue with an idiot; people watching may not be able to tell the difference."

He clapped the scientist on the back (probably a little harder than was necessary) and set off for the commissary once again, leaving Dr. Lee to stare after him, his mouth flapping wordlessly.

Luckily for everyone on base, Jack ran into no further obstacles and was soon in the commissary, loading food onto his tray. He took a seat at an empty table and dug in, gloriously oblivious to anything but his long-awaited meal. He was halfway through his lasagna when he was interrupted. But it wasn't an unwelcome interruption.

"Hi, sir. Mind if I join you?"

Jack looked up to see Carter standing next to the table, holding her own food tray. "Be my guest." He waved a hand at the empty chair across from him. "But do so at your own risk. I only just got rid of Spatzwick."

Even Jack knew he sounded grumpy, but Carter smiled anyway and set her tray on the table.

"I'll take my chances." She pulled out the empty chair and took a seat. Then she looked across the table at him. "So, the meeting was that bad, huh?"

"Worse," Jack grumbled as he stabbed his fork into his lasagna. "Don't get me started."

"Okay, I won't," Carter replied, and Jack noticed a slight smile on her face as she picked up her spoon and scooped up some Jell-O.

Carter's eyes were on her own food now, but Jack's were on her. Watching as she tucked into her blue Jell-O, Jack suddenly felt his dark mood begin to lift. There was something so familiar about Samantha Carter sitting there eating her blue Jell-O. There was something so right about it.

Lifting her eyes, she noticed Jack watching her and stopped, her spoon in mid-air. "What?" she asked suspiciously as a grin started to appear on Jack's face.

"Nothing," he replied, grinning even more widely now.

She still looked suspicious, but a smile was tugging at the corners of her mouth as she turned back to her dessert. Jack began eating again himself, but this time his attention wasn't completely focused on his food.

Nothing, he echoed to himself. Except that my day just got a whole lot better.

The End.