A/N: I'm finally back! It's been a busy few weeks not only for LorelaiAkaCoffeeAddict who had a great time in the states, but for me as well. Only a few more weeks till summer break and it feels like we have to do as much as we did the past few months in those weeks. Of course that's not the complete truth but it's really busy! But I wrote this chapter and another one that will be updated within a few days. It needs a little editing before I post it.
So, I want to thank anyone who read and reviewed my last chapter. Of course I want to thank LorelaiAkaCoffeeAddict for proofread and I'm looking forward to the pictures! And last, I hope you all enjoy reading this chapter, and of course, let me know what you think!
Chapter 33 Too busy
It was the last week of May and the inn was completely booked. The weather was great and there were several calls a day from people who wanted to book a room last minute. Most of the time Lorelai had to say no. Some of those people booked a room for a different weekend or midweek, others tried to find accommodation in the area. Therefore, the diner was busy too. No matter what time you walked in, there was always a crowd. Luke, Lane and Caesar had to work hard to serve the customers and not to make them wait long.
Even though they were both pleased with the good business, there were a lot of disadvantages too. Luke and Lorelai didn't have much time to spend together. They both worked long hours. There were many days when Luke didn't get home before ten. And even if he did, they fell asleep on the couch together after dinner, only to wake up around 10.30 to give Lucan his last feeding and to go to bed. The next day the alarm would go off again early and the same routine would start all over again.
On the days Lorelai had some energy left she would go to Hartford to visit her mother. Emily was finally able to go home. A physical therapist was coming by the house every day for her rehab and Richard had hired a nurse to help him take care of Emily. She complained at first but soon realized she couldn't do it all by herself, and she didn't want to be a burden to Richard. He was aware of his wife's independence, which was part of the reason he hired the nurse. She would know when to help and how to teach Emily to do things herself.
Lorelai wished she could do more for her mother, but she hardly had the time to take care of her son. She hated herself for thinking how lucky she was that Lucan was so easy and so little. He was asleep most of the time and at the times he was awake, he's playing in his playpen. He was never crying in order to get some attention. She had no idea how she could have handled things if Lucan wasn't so easy. She knew she probably couldn't. And she got lucky twice, first with Rory and now with Lucan. She wondered where her kids got it though, because from what she's heard she was nothing like that as a baby, more the complete opposite.
Michel was still in France with his mother, but he was supposed to come home by the end of the week. Lorelai hoped that things would be better to handle when he could take over some of her work, and that she might be able to spend some time with Luke again. Because even though they were living together, she really missed him.
It was Tuesday evening and Lorelai walked into the diner around 5.45. The place was crowded as expected. There was no free table and every seat at the counter was taken. She sighed deeply as she looked around in search of Luke. He was nowhere to be seen. Lane walked into the area a few seconds later. "Hi."
Lane kept walking as she replied. "Hey."
"Where's Luke?"
"Helping Caesar in the kitchen."
"You need any help?"
"I could use some, but you better check upstairs. I heard some crying coming from the baby monitor and Luke has his hands full."
"Okay thanks." Lorelai walked pass the curtain and soon heard her son crying. She tried to open the door to the apartment but to her surprise it was locked. "Shit." She walked downstairs and into the kitchen. "Luke?"
He turned around. "What are you doing here? You know you're not allowed here."
"I need the key to the apartment. Lucan is crying and the door's locked."
"He's crying?"
"Don't you hear that?" She pointed towards the baby monitor.
"Oh." He wiped his forehead. "I didn't…. I'm sorry. It's just that it's so busy and…"
"I know. It's okay. Just give me the keys."
"Sure." He pulled the keys out of his pocket and handed them to Lorelai. "Tell me when you leave okay?"
"I will." With that she turned around and walked upstairs again. The baby was crying even harder, clearly upset that nobody came to get him yet. She struggled to open the lock, which wasn't going so well as she wanted to do it fast. "I'm coming honey. Mommy's coming." She finally got the door open. She was near Lucan's crib within 3 big steps. His face was dark red. When she picked him up she felt that his clothes were completely soaked wet. She wanted to change him but knew she had to calm him down first so cuddled him to her chest. It took her almost 15 minutes to calm him down a little. She put him on the changing table and removed his clothes. His diaper looked like it wasn't changed in hours.
She picked up the baby and walked in the bathroom to wet a washcloth. Then she walked back to the changing table to clean up the baby. After she was done she pulled a bottle from the fridge and put a pan with water on the stove to heat it up. The baby started crying again, obviously hungry. "How long is it since you ate huh?" She was angry with Luke. How could he do this? Normally the baby wasn't hungry around this time. He ate around 4.30 and wouldn't be hungry again until around 8 o clock. It took about 5 minutes for the bottle to heat up and she cursed herself for giving up breast-feeding earlier. The milk expressing just wasn't working, especially not when she was so busy. The formula was just a lot easier. She already felt guilty about that, and now she even had to feel guilty for leaving the baby with his father because he couldn't take care of him. Lorelai sat down on the couch as she fed the baby. He finished his bottle within a few minutes, way sooner than he normally did. And he looked like he wanted even more.
Lorelai decided to go home without saying goodbye to Luke because she was too angry. She didn't want to see him right now. The baby had fallen asleep in his stroller on the way home so she left him in the living room. She walked into the kitchen and opened the fridge. There was nothing eatable in there so she called Joe and ordered a pizza. While waiting she flipped through some channels, but there was nothing that caught her attention.
Luke came home around 9 o clock. He smiled when he saw Lorelai lying asleep on the couch. His smile faded when he noticed how exhausted she looked, even while asleep. He knew how hard both of them had been lately and he hated it. He sat down in front of her on the couch and kissed her cheek. "Lorelai" He whispered, even though he wanted her to wake up.
When she didn't responded he tried it again, a little louder. "Lorelai, wake up."
She murmured sleepily but didn't open her eyes. "Hey, what time is it."
"9. Why don't you go to bed? You're exhausted. I'll take care of Lucan."
She shot up at that. "Yeah right."
Luke, completely oblivious to what happened in the diner earlier, was confused by her reaction. "What's wrong?"
"Like you don't know that Luke. Why don't you go to bed so I'm sure he gets something to eat."
"What?" He was even more confused now. "What happened? Lorelai?"
"I already said, like you don't know."
"Well, I don't. I have no idea why you're acting like this. Did something happen to Lucan? Is he okay?"
"He's fine now, but not thanks to you. Is it so hard to take care of our son Luke, to feed him when he's hungry?"
"I do, I feed him."
"Well obviously you do not." She stood up and walked away, upstairs and slammed the bedroom door shut.
Luke watched her climb the stairs and had no idea what he did wrong. He knew talking to Lorelai now wouldn't do any good. He first had to figure out what he did wrong before he could defend himself. He thought back to the events earlier that day.
Flashback
"Hey Lane, I'm going upstairs to check up on Lucan okay?"
"Sure boss."
Luke climbed the stairs and opened the door to his apartment softly. He walked into the room and saw his son still asleep in his crib. He must have been exhausted. He's starting to play more lately so that's tiring him out. Luke touched the cheek of his son with his index finger and smiled at him before tip- toeing out of the room as to not wake the baby. He closed the door to the apartment and locked it. He didn't want anyone to be able to get to the baby and take him away without his knowledge. Living in this crazy town he knew that could happen, and he wanted to try to keep the baby out of their hands.
He walked downstairs. "Hey Luke, you're back already?"
"Yeah, Lucan was still asleep. I'll check up again on him later."
"Sure." She handed him a paper with an order written on it.
"Thanks." He walked into the kitchen to help Caesar with the food. He was focused on his work and was only disturbed by Lane giving him the orders. He checked up on Lucan a while later but he was still asleep. Completely focused on his work he didn't hear anything around him.
He didn't look up until he heard his name behind him. "Luke?" He turned around and saw Lorelai standing there.
"I need the key to the apartment. Lucan is crying and the door's locked."
"He's crying?" 'I hadn't heard anything.'
"Don't you hear that?" She pointed towards the baby monitor.
"Oh." He wiped his forehead. "I didn't…. I'm sorry. It's just that it's so busy and…" 'How could I have missed that?'
"I know. It's okay. Just give me the keys."
"Sure." He pulled the keys out of his pocket and handed them to Lorelai. "Tell me when you leave okay?"
"I will." Luke turned around to turn off the baby monitor. He wouldn't need it anymore now.
Half an hour later he saw Lorelai walking out of the diner, without saying goodbye. 'Did I do something wrong? I though she would say goodbye. Maybe she just wants to get home early…'
"Hey Luke? 2 Cheeseburgers with chili fries, a Caesar salad and a turkey sandwich."
He looked up and forgot about Lorelai. "Coming right up."
End flashback
"Shit." He cursed out loud. 'She must be angry about the baby crying while I was in the kitchen. What time was that anyway?' He honestly had no idea. He decided to go upstairs to find out what was bothering her.
Lorelai was lying on the bed, the baby monitor in her hands. She looked up when Luke walked into the room, but said nothing.
"What time was it when you walked into the diner earlier?"
She still didn't replied.
"Look, I don't know what I did wrong. I had no idea what time it was, the place was crowded, and the baby was sleeping upstairs. Then you walk into the kitchen and tell me that he's crying and the next thing I see is that you're walking out without saying goodbye. But I honestly don't know what I did wrong. I don't." He sounded lost.
"Then you're a bigger idiot than I thought, Luke. It was 5.45 when I walked in there. An hour and fifteen minutes after our son usually wakes up hungry. And it wasn't like he was just crying when I walked up there. His face was dark red and his clothes were completely soaked wet. You were supposed to take care of him Luke, but you forgot about him. A few weeks ago you promised me that I don't have to do this all alone, that you're here to help me. But how can you do that if you forget him? I take him the rest of the week so I know he actually gets some food." She was so angry.
"I did not forget about him Lorelai." Luke tried to stay calm but had trouble doing so.
"How dare you say that? It was obvious he was crying. Lane told me the second I walked into the diner and you didn't even hear him Luke. And the kid was starved. So don't tell me you didn't forget about him because it was obvious you did. And there's no excuse for that. I'm busy too but I never forget to feed my son. Not once Luke." She looked away while she said that, then stood up and tried to walk away again.
He grabbed her arm and turned her around. "Don't walk away from me, we're not done here. I checked on him twice after 5.30 and he was still asleep, so don't tell me I forgot about him. I did not do such a thing."
"Let go of me Luke." She tried to pull away.
"No, I won't. You're not walking away from me. I want to talk about this."
"Well, I don't."
He shook his head and let go of her arm. "Then go. I can't talk to you when you're like this anyway. I just…" His voice was soft and almost inaudible.
She didn't notice this, as she was so angry and walked out of the room. Luke let himself fall down on the bed. He knew he had to leave her alone for a while. Talking to her was no option now she was so mad. He turned on the TV and started flipping channels.
Lorelai walked downstairs and tried hard to calm herself down. She was so mad that it wasn't really working. She felt like screaming or throwing with something. Part of her knew that it wasn't all Luke's fault but that made her even angrier. She knew it, but she was too stubborn to give in and go upstairs to talk to him. And she knew that now she was so angry, it wouldn't work anyway.
She stayed downstairs until it was almost time to feed the baby. She went into the kitchen to make his bottle. After it was warm enough she went upstairs to Lucan's room. She was surprised to see Luke there. He was holding the baby in his arms, talking to him. She smiled but then remembered she was mad at him. "It's time to feed him. You can hand him to me now."
"Give me the bottle, I'll do it. I know how tired you are, you should get some sleep."
"No, I want to be sure he actually gets his food, so I'll do it."
"Lorelai." He sighed.
"Luke." She replied angry.
"Fine." He kissed the baby's forehead and handed him to Lorelai. He wasn't going to fight her in front of their son. He shot her an angry look before he walked out the room and into their bedroom.
When Lucan finished his bottle, Lorelai didn't know what to do next. When she closed the door of his room behind her she glanced at their bedroom. The door was closed. This wasn't a usual sight and she thought immediately that Luke didn't want her there, so she walked downstairs instead. She put the bottle in the dishwasher and walked into Rory's room.
After turning around in Rory's bed for half an hour Lorelai gave up. She went to the living room and picked up the phone. She dialed a number and waited for the other person to pick up.
"Hello?"
"Hey Rory."
"Mom, hi. Why are you calling me this late, is everything okay?"
"No, not really. I had a mayor fight with Luke."
"About what?"
"Lucan. You know that we've both been really busy right? And that we hardly see each other lately? Well, today I walked into the diner a quarter to six and the place was crowded like it always is lately and I asked Lane if she could use some help she said yes but that I better go upstairs to check on Lucan because he was crying. So I go upstairs and find the door locked, I go down in the kitchen to get the key from Luke and go back upstairs where I find him lying in his bed really upset and completely soaking wet and…."
"Mom slow down."
Lorelai sighed. "He forgot about him Rory. He forgot to feed his own son and to change his diaper. He usually wakes up hungry around 4.30 but it was 5.45 already."
"What did Luke say when you confronted him?"
"First he had no idea what I was talking about so I walked away from him. Later he came to find me and he tried to talk to me but I wouldn't really listen to him."
"Oh mom. Maybe he has a perfectly good explanation for all this."
"There's not such a thing Rory, you just don't forget about your son…." She paused before she added. "You just don't."
"Mom, this is not all about Luke is it?"
Lorelai shook her head. "I forgot about him yesterday. At least, I almost forgot about him. Sookie asked me if it weren't time to feed him, otherwise I would have forgotten him. I would have. You just don't do that, right? No matter how busy you are, you can't forget about your kids. I never forgot about you, not once."
Rory smiled. "Yes you did."
"What?"
"Remember this time when I was 6 and I went to play with Lane? Mrs. Kim brought me home around 8 because you forgot to pick me up. We found you asleep on the bed. The inn was so busy and you were working so hard. Mia told you to take a break but you said it wasn't necessary. And then you've had just fallen asleep and forgot about me."
"I forgot about that. You were so sad when Mrs. Kim brought you home. You thought I didn't want you anymore."
"I remember. And then you told me that no matter how busy you were, I would always come first. You felt so guilty. It never happened again afterwards. And mom, I'm sure you wouldn't have forgotten about Lucan. Plus, he would have let you know if he was hungry."
"I guess you're right. Thanks hon."
"Your welcome. And mom?"
"Yeah?"
"Don't be angry at Luke. He's a really great father to Lucan and there really will be a reason behind this. And if you wouldn't have walked into the diner, I'm sure Lane would have told Luke about Lucan crying so he would have gone to him."
"Maybe you're right."
"I am, I am right. Go talk to him, mom."
"I can't. Not yet. He must be really angry with me for walking away from him twice. He closed the bedroom door, he never does that."
"Wouldn't it better if you come to him instead of waiting for him to come to you again?"
"Maybe, but I better let him cool off. Plus he's probably asleep right now and he needs his sleep. He really is working so hard right now."
"Okay. But promise me you'll talk to him tomorrow."
"I will."
"Good. Now get some sleep yourself. It's really late."
"I will. Thanks, sweetie."
"Goodnight mom. I love you."
"Love you too." With that they both hung up. Lorelai walked back into Rory's room and tried to get some sleep. After waking up for the fifth time she gave up and went into the kitchen to make herself some coffee.
Luke woke up for the 10th time that night around 3 o clock. He couldn't sleep well without Lorelai next to him. He knew they were fighting but he had no idea why she decided to sleep somewhere else. He wondered how this fight had gotten so bad. He went downstairs and found Lorelai sitting at the kitchen table, her hands around a coffee mug. "Hey."
She looked up. "Hey".
He filled the kettle with water and put it on the stove. He looked at Lorelai from a distance and knew that she hadn't slept at all. He waited for the water to boil and made himself a cup of tea. Then he took a seat across from Lorelai's. He thought of something to say without getting her mad again. He knew they were both even more exhausted then they already were with the lack of sleep and he couldn't handle fighting with her again.
"I'm sorry."
She looked up again and shook her head. "You should be."
"I didn't hear him Lorelai, I know I should have, but I didn't. Am I a bad father because of that? Because…"
"I overreacted. You're the best father anyone can wish for Luke. We're both busy and we don't have time to take care of our son. If you're a bad father then I'm a bad mother, too."
"You're not Lorelai. You're a great mom."
She nodded. "We have to do something about this. It's bad when we start forgetting about our kid."
"I, not we..."
"No we. The day before it was Sookie that told me that I had to feed Lucan, if she hadn't I might have forgotten it too."
"I don't believe that. You never forget about him. No matter what happens, he always comes first."
"The same with you Luke. It was just as much me, as it was you. The season is extraordinary, the weather is better than it has even been around this time of the year and all the tourists seem to want to come here for some reason. And it's great for business, both yours as mine, but we just can't handle the pressure. It's been like this for almost 2 weeks now and the inn is completely booked for the next few weeks as well, so it looks like there won't be any changes soon. But we can't go on like this. We hardly see each other awake, and now when we do we're fighting. I don't want that Luke."
"Neither do I. I'll start looking for some help today. Hiring one or two extra employees should do it. Both Caesar and Lane have been working fulltime lately and so have I. Neither of us had a day off, or even a few hours."
"I'll do the same. Michel will be back by the end of the week, but I think I can hire someone extra. With the way the inn is going now, we can afford it. Then maybe we can both take a day or so off soon and spend some time together, with the baby of course."
"I'd like that." He smiled.
She stood up, walked around the table and sat down on Luke's lap. She put her arms around his neck and laid her head in the crook of his neck. He hugged her tight. After a while he pulled back and kissed her. "It's still early. We can get a few more hours of sleep if we go to bed now. I know we can both use it."
"Sounds like a great plan. I just can't sleep without you next to me."
"Yeah, same here." He kissed her again before they stood up and walked up the stairs together.
A/N: That's it for now. Hope you enjoyed it and don't forget to let me know ;) The next chapter will be up soon!