Another successful chapter and tons of reviews. Aww, shucks, y'all've been spoilin' us!
Erik: You really shouldn't use that Texan slang… It just sounds weird when you say it…
Oh, fine! (Pouts) I suppose we should get started then, eh?
Erik: Thank goodness! The authoress has been playing Extreme Make-Over with me all morning!
You know, girls would like you better if you would just show a little more concern for your outward appearance!
Erik: There's not a whole lot I can do about my outward appearance!
Sure there is! For one thing, you need a haircut. Try cleaning under your nails and changing your clothes once in a while. Oh, and no more wearing open shirts until you shave your chest… Or at least comb it!
Erik: You are so irritating!
I try. Now let's get down to business…
Emma Nobel: Wow, thanks for your compliments! Aww, I feel all warm inside!
Erik: Excuse me while I vomit…
Erik! Show some manners! Oh, and don't forget to read this girl's story… Romance and Adventure aboard the Surprise, in the Master and Commander section… You don't mind if I advertise, do you? I'm glad you're finding the story so amusing. By the way, who's this Hollom?
zero sparrow: Alright! I'm glad the last chapter won your seal of approval… This one's a bit longer, I think… I hope you find it entertaining…
Erik: Sleepy Hollow? Now that's an awesome horror movie! Although Nightmare on Elm Street sounds intriguing. What the heck! Bring both!
Araiona Dubois: I'm glad you're enjoying it! Thanks for reviewing!
Erik: Did she bring popcorn?
Oh, is that all you ever think about?
Erik: Occasionally I think about clodhoppers…
Starrylibra: Why, thank you for the compliments! I had hoped that these A/N's would be entertaining…
Erik: She wants to keep me? That is not a good thing at all!
Would you rather stay with me?
Erik: I'd rather go back to my lair… How'd I get here, anyway? Where's Paris? Where am I? What are you? AHHHHHHHH!
Drama Mama…
AngelicFlutist: Another new reader! I'm glad you're enjoying this story. Don't be alarmed, I normally torture Erik in all of my A/N's.
Erik: Ha! Get her to read your A/N's in Child of the Wilderness! When all of a sudden did you get this brilliant idea to start selling me for reviews?
Hey, it brought in feedback, didn't it? And it's made this reader a faithful reviewer. Welcome to the family! No, we haven't seen Se7en yet. Bring it along and we'll have a little party tonight!
VagrantCandy: Another one for Sleepy Hollow! I think we have a choice movie for tonight. Oh, just in case it wasn't clear in the chapter, I'll clarify it now – Fantine doesn't know that Erik caused her accident… She just thinks it was some freak thing right now… We'll get into that later…
DarkSilverMaiden: Bonjour! Je suis heureux que vous aimiez le livre. J'aime faire des histories. Sorry, my French is a little rusty… French is a beautiful language, no? I'm glad that you're learning. Good for you! Oh, and thank you for your feedback!
Erik: What the…? Merde! Un autre lecteur qui parle français!
Erik! Watch your language! Oh, and I've been told to give this to you… (Starts giving Erik a back massage).
Erik: Hey… That feels good…
Tadriendra of Mirkwood: She's got a story out? Yay! You don't mind if I advertise yours too, do you? Everyone check out this fic: The Opera Populaire's New Owner.
Erik: It's me! It must be!
Well, Erik, we'll have to read it first…
Erik: And I'd be more than happy to massage you any time…
FOPkiller15: Now is that cool pen name, or what? Yes! Fop-killer! Anyway, thanks for reviewing. I'm glad you're finding it interesting so far.
Erik: With a pen name like that, I'm sure that this reader and I will grow to be very close friends…
Me and My Shadow: Hey! We have the same name! Well, mine is spelt differently, but that is cool! Well, I hope you find this next chapter as good as the previous ones.
Erik: And we'll share a big bowl of popcorn tonight… Buttered, preferably…
Butter's bad for you, Erik!
Erik: Health-nut…
darklady5289: This review was just a warning to you, Erik… Don't get any ideas about the lady named after a prostitute.
Erik: What kind of person to you people think I am?
The kind that went after a girl half your age…
Erik: Hmm… You hold a good point… Nonetheless, Christine looked mighty fine in the slave-costume in the movie… Oui, mighty fine…
GalindaxlovesxErik: New to the fanfic scene? Well, I'm glad you chose to check us out! Carrie? That's Stephen King, isn't it?
Erik: Yes! And it's an awesome film! Let's watch that! She's even bringing popcorn!
Calmeth thyself. We have to read the new chapter first.
Erik: Oh, fine!
Next chapter in the tale of both hilarity and insanity. Hope you enjoy it.
XxXxX
An interesting partnership indeed! After only a week of living together, Erik and Fantine were driving each other completely insane!
"Hurry up!" Erik shouted as he banged on the door to the bathroom. "The opera begins in an hour and I need to get ready!"
"Hold your bloody horses!" Fantine snapped. "I'm almost done!"
"You've been saying that for the past twenty minutes!" Erik said as he flopped down onto the couch.
Ten minutes later, Erik was contemplating breaking the door down when Fantine finally emerged, hair wrapped up in a towel, wearing a dark blue dressing robe. She wasn't wearing her mask, though. She had taken it off to bathe.
The two phantoms had gotten used to allowing the other to see their face unmasked. Erik had hoped that this would be the foundation for what could later become trust, however this woman was becoming increasingly difficult to live with. She drank all his tea, she was constantly rearranging his things (an obvious breach of rule number six, he was constantly reminding her), and now, she was hogging the bathroom!
Erik still found her bared visage rather… unsightly… Not something he thought he'd like to wake up to first thing every morning… But surely one could become accustomed to such a face, given time? But then, of course, her fool of a fiancé hadn't seemed to be able to get used to it. Erik felt his anger flare a little at the thought of the man. Erik certainly was not going to shun Fantine like he did. Besides, Erik reminded himself, his own face looked far worse than hers ever could.
"Did you enjoy your bath?" he asked with forced sweetness.
"Very much so," she replied as she headed to her room. "Bathroom's yours."
Erik growled as he entered the bathroom. "Rule number seven: time-limit on your baths is twenty minutes!" he called after her.
Stripping down, he muttered to himself. "That woman will be the death of me!"
Erik stepped into the tub and lowered himself into the water.
Stupid wench let the water get cold…
He bathed quickly and dried off. He dressed in his best eveningwear and donned his cloak.
"Fantine?" he called. "I'm leaving now!"
No answer.
Stupid woman! Who knew where she was?
Erik took the boat across the lake and emerged from the secret entrance. Blending into the shadows, he ascended the Grand Staircase and entered Box Five.
There was someone sitting there!
Erik cursed under his breath, then straightened up. "This is the Phantom's private box!" he said menacingly. "Get out; or feel my wrath!"
"Yeah, whatever," an all-too-familiar voice responded. "Come in and sit down and don't talk during the performance or feel my wrath!"
Erik growled and took a seat beside Fantine. "What are you doing here?"
She looked at him innocently. "Is it against the rules for a Phantom to watch an opera now?"
"No, but it is against the rules for a Phantom to drool over a certain chorus boy, you may recall."
"Ah, not a chorus boy anymore," she smiled. "Just watch… after tonight, he'll be a star."
Erik sighed as he slouched in his seat. Now where had he heard this before?
"He's really very good," Fantine continued. "He's just never had the opportunity to display his talent. Nor would he, were it not for me! I hate seeing good talent go unnoticed, don't you?"
"Hmm…" Erik murmured as a form of response.
Fantine glanced at him. "That sounds like a 'hmm' with a story behind it."
"Rule number eight: don't ask me about my past!" he growled.
She pouted. "Oh, now, that's hardly fair. I told you all about my past."
"You're forgetting rule number four," Erik snapped. "Phantoms don't pout!"
She sighed. "You and I truly are like oil and water," she said. "Perhaps if you only trusted me a little more and loosened up a bit, things between us would not be so difficult."
Erik stared at the floor. "No, little one," he thought. "We're more alike than you know."
XxXxX
What did you think, Erik?
Erik: Something tells me that this girl and I are going to kill each other.
Well, aren't we just Mr. Optimistic?
Erik: Whatever... We've been hauling in a lot of reviews lately, so thank you all for the feedback. Now if you'll excuse me, I must return to my work... (pulls out a laptop).
What are you doing with that?
Erik: I'm writing a fanfic.
Dare I ask what it's called?
Erik: Fop Torture for Dummies... I figure I've thrown the stupid Vicomte out of enough windows that I qualify as an expert.
Oh, brother... See you all tomorrow...