Ack! I got attacked by another plot bunny at 1:00 this morning. Stupid
things. And they keep reproducing like, well, rabbits. Anyhoo, this is set
in the future- around now, actually. Don't know if I'm going to continue or
not. If I do, it's not meant to be a humor fic, although this part is
funny. Anyway, enjoy.
Disclaimer: Yeah, right, I wish.
*
As he walked down the hall, his keen elven ears picked up the sound of muffled giggling, desperately trying to be concealed. Following the sounds, the tall blond elf was led to one of the closed offices. As he opened the door to the darkened office space, the sounds abruptly stopped. Determined to find the source, the elf kept walking past the cubicles until he discovered a slightly younger elf sitting at one of the computers and purposefully ignoring the other. He had quickly covered up a window when the elder elf had appeared.
"Legolas, what are you doing?"
"Nothing!" Legolas answered just a little too quickly.
"Legolas, I've died and returned. I've participated in nearly every major battle and had an affair with three different queens of England. You don't get that far in life without learning a few things. Like blatant lying."
"Really Glorfindel, it's nothing," Legolas insisted.
"Well if it's nothing, you won't mind me looking at it."
"No, wait!" Legolas and Glorfindel wrestled for the mouse for a few moments before Glorfindel succeeded in knocking Legolas out of his chair.
"Fanfiction?" he read aloud. "What in the name of god is this?"
"Why, Glorfindel. I had no idea you were Catholic," said Legolas in a desperate attempt to change the conversation. "Isn't it time for your daily Mass?" Glorfindel spared him a withering glance. "It's nothing you'd be interested in. Really." Legolas made a wild grab for the mouse but missed. "Just a site for people to write stories about their favourite stories." But Glorfindel had already read the summary.
"Elrond and Glorfindel are in the throes of a passionate love affair?" he repeated incredulously. Legolas couldn't help sniggering.
Glorfindel grew more horrified as the story continued. His reading was interrupted with his terrified comments of,
"B-b-but- is that even possible?" and
"I'd never do that!" and
"Celebrian would kill me!"
"But Elrond wouldn't mind?" Legolas interjected, smirking. Glorfindel looked at him.
"You are a twisted little elfling."
"Hey, I only think they're funny because, well, it's you. And Elrond. And would never happen. It gets better though. Read the next line."
Glorfindel read the next line.
Seeing Glorfindel, an elf who was well on his way to 30 000 years old, had died and lived to tell about it, participated in every conceivable major battle (and some inconceivable ones) and shagged at least three different queens of England squeal "Ewwwwwww" like a little girl was too much for Legolas. He collapsed on the floor giggling like a child.
Disclaimer: Yeah, right, I wish.
*
As he walked down the hall, his keen elven ears picked up the sound of muffled giggling, desperately trying to be concealed. Following the sounds, the tall blond elf was led to one of the closed offices. As he opened the door to the darkened office space, the sounds abruptly stopped. Determined to find the source, the elf kept walking past the cubicles until he discovered a slightly younger elf sitting at one of the computers and purposefully ignoring the other. He had quickly covered up a window when the elder elf had appeared.
"Legolas, what are you doing?"
"Nothing!" Legolas answered just a little too quickly.
"Legolas, I've died and returned. I've participated in nearly every major battle and had an affair with three different queens of England. You don't get that far in life without learning a few things. Like blatant lying."
"Really Glorfindel, it's nothing," Legolas insisted.
"Well if it's nothing, you won't mind me looking at it."
"No, wait!" Legolas and Glorfindel wrestled for the mouse for a few moments before Glorfindel succeeded in knocking Legolas out of his chair.
"Fanfiction?" he read aloud. "What in the name of god is this?"
"Why, Glorfindel. I had no idea you were Catholic," said Legolas in a desperate attempt to change the conversation. "Isn't it time for your daily Mass?" Glorfindel spared him a withering glance. "It's nothing you'd be interested in. Really." Legolas made a wild grab for the mouse but missed. "Just a site for people to write stories about their favourite stories." But Glorfindel had already read the summary.
"Elrond and Glorfindel are in the throes of a passionate love affair?" he repeated incredulously. Legolas couldn't help sniggering.
Glorfindel grew more horrified as the story continued. His reading was interrupted with his terrified comments of,
"B-b-but- is that even possible?" and
"I'd never do that!" and
"Celebrian would kill me!"
"But Elrond wouldn't mind?" Legolas interjected, smirking. Glorfindel looked at him.
"You are a twisted little elfling."
"Hey, I only think they're funny because, well, it's you. And Elrond. And would never happen. It gets better though. Read the next line."
Glorfindel read the next line.
Seeing Glorfindel, an elf who was well on his way to 30 000 years old, had died and lived to tell about it, participated in every conceivable major battle (and some inconceivable ones) and shagged at least three different queens of England squeal "Ewwwwwww" like a little girl was too much for Legolas. He collapsed on the floor giggling like a child.