Yay! More!
Bratprincess: You know perfectly well what I'd do if the twins propositioned me. Say 'hell yes!' and drag them to the nearest hotel/deserted alley/table. And hey look! SKT is in this one! Yay!
And now for chapter 5, starring Legolas, Elladan, Elrohir, Erestor, SKT and Aragorn?
*
~In that very secret place where the souls of the Middle-Earthians who died go~
Aragorn dodged the shot-glass aimed at his head. "Arwen, darling, calm down."
"Calm down?" his wife shrieked. "Calm down? I'll show you calm down!" She grabbed at the nearest object, which happened to be Pippin, who had snuck in to watch the yelling.
"Hey! It's me!" he cried.
"Oh, sorry." She grabbed a heavy book off the nightstand and threw it at Aragorn, missing his face by maybe an inch and hitting the wall instead. Aragorn stared at the place where his head had been and back at her.
"Arwen, sweetheart, I don't understand."
She laughed coldly. "Oh, you don't understand, don't you? That's really rich Aragorn. Really, really rich." She picked up the lamp and tossed it, aiming directly between his legs. Aragorn gave a 'Yipe!' and dived away.
"What did I do?" he asked pitifully.
"You and LEGOLAS!" she screamed. "How could you??"
"WHAT?" Aragorn cried. "Me and L-what?? I never, ever... it's Legolas!"
"You liar! I know you did. Admit it!"
"I can't admit it, there's nothing to admit. It's LEGOLAS."
"I was watching them, and Legolas was going on and on about how much he missed his precious Aragorn. You lying, cheating BASTARD!" Arwen ran over and kicked her husband in the arse. Then she covered her mouth in shock as he disappeared.
~Back on earth~
The twins had somehow managed to coerce Erestor into one of the offices. They, along with Legolas, had taken it upon themselves to introduce Erestor to exactly what Teleporno Industries had to live up to.
"Oh m-my," he said, staring at the screen, horror-stricken. Legolas gave half a giggle, but his heart wasn't really into it as he still missed Aragorn. The twins shared malicious grins; revenge upon their old tutor was sweet.
"Shame Haldir had to miss this," Elladan muttered. "Where is he, anyway?"
"Celeborn transferred him. To Guatemala," Elrohir snickered.
"Do we even HAVE a chain in Guatemala?"
"We do now."
"Are there any other of these... stories that are not quite so... explicit?" Erestor asked. Elladan, Elrohir and Legolas all looked at each other.
"I don't know," Legolas admitted. "I've never checked."
Eventually they did find a story. One that began to depress Legolas anymore.
"B-but, my father would never do something like that," he protested, looking like a kicked puppy dog. "H-he loves me. He'd n-never s-s-sell me as a slave f-for treasure and j-jewels, w-would he?" His lower lip was beginning to quiver.
"Oh come on, Legolas," Elrohir assured him. "It's just a story. The elves don't even HAVE slaves, remember? How could he sell you as one?"
Legolas didn't look entirely convinced. "H-he does love me though, r-right? T-tell me he l-loves me. He'd n-never do that, r-right? I can't s-stand it if he d-doesn't l-love me either." Tears were beginning to well in Legolas' eyes.
"Oh, well done Erestor," Elladan growled. "Out of all the stories out there, you HAD to go and find one where Legolas' father beat him. We're trying to get his mind OFF his troubles, not add more."
Legolas, meanwhile, was trying to convince Elrohir that his father did, in fact, love him. Unfortunately, it was turning out to be Elrohir who did most of the convincing.
"A-ada loves me, r-right? He's n-never k-kicked or hit me, and he n-never would, r-right?"
At that moment, the object of their discussions entered the room. He was dressed in a black suit with a high collar. The white shirt beneath was ruffled and he wore a black tie. Black leather gloves covered his hands, and his long blond hair was tied back loosely. There was an odd look about him; as if he knew something the others did not. Putting on an innocent look, he moved toward them.
Legolas looked up, apparently not noticing the odd look his father had. "Ada, y-you love me, r-right?"
"Of course I do, Legolas," he assured his son. But he was not looking at Legolas. His sultry eyes were fixated on Erestor, who inched away rather nervously.
"King Thranduil, are you alright?" Elladan asked. Thranduil waved an arm impatiently.
"Of course! I'm fine." His eyes still hadn't left Erestor's face, who was looking more and more nervous.
Before anything more could be said, however, there was a large thump. All eyes turned to look at the disheveled figure that had just appeared in the corner. It was quiet for a moment as Aragorn looked up at them, grey eyes very confused.
"How did I get here?"
Nobody had a chance to answer, because Legolas took it upon himself to personally give Aragorn a very personal greeting.
"Aragorn!" he shrieked, leaping up and jumping on top of the former king of Gondor. He straddled his friend's stomach and began kissing him madly. Aragorn couldn't even speak; he was in shock.
The twins watched in bemusement for several long seconds, but decided it was probably time to intervene when Legolas began removing Aragorn's shirt. This, however, proved more difficult than first thought, as Legolas seemed very reluctant to relinquish his friend. Therefore, untangling Legolas from Aragorn required both twins full effort.
Which left Thranduil and Erestor.
Thranduil edged toward Erestor. Thranduil looked Erestor up and down and licked his lips. Erestor had the sense to quiver. He wasn't sure if it was the good kind of quiver, or the bad kind.
"They're rather preoccupied, wouldn't you say?" Thranduil asked. Erestor nodded, his eyes very wide. "Now, wouldn't you like to see what those... 'fics' are REALLY like?" sex-kitten Thranduil purred. Erestor nodded again, unable to do anything else. Erestor pounced on him, knocking him to the ground. He quickly removed his tie and used it to tie Erestor's hands behind his back. He sat up and looked around. Spying Aragorn's removed shirt a few feet away, he grabbed it and ripped off the sleeve, using it to gag Erestor. Then, slinging said elf over his shoulder, he left the room, looking very pleased with himself.
Twenty minutes, three ripped shirts, two swollen pairs of lips and one very nearly almost removed pair of breeches later, Elladan and Elrohir finally succeeded in removing Legolas from Aragorn. They were all breathing heavily (although Legolas and Aragorn for a very different reason) and Legolas looked very pleased with himself. Aragorn, on the other hand, looked traumatized for life.
"Explain?" he begged his foster brothers.
"That's rather difficult, as we're not exactly sure ourselves," Elrohir said, trying to hold back a squirming Legolas. "But we think it has something to do with the fics."
"Fics?" Aragorn repeated, looking confused. Elrohir sighed.
"We have A LOT to talk about."
Elladan, meanwhile, was looking around. "Where'd Thranduil and Erestor go?"
Bratprincess: You know perfectly well what I'd do if the twins propositioned me. Say 'hell yes!' and drag them to the nearest hotel/deserted alley/table. And hey look! SKT is in this one! Yay!
And now for chapter 5, starring Legolas, Elladan, Elrohir, Erestor, SKT and Aragorn?
*
~In that very secret place where the souls of the Middle-Earthians who died go~
Aragorn dodged the shot-glass aimed at his head. "Arwen, darling, calm down."
"Calm down?" his wife shrieked. "Calm down? I'll show you calm down!" She grabbed at the nearest object, which happened to be Pippin, who had snuck in to watch the yelling.
"Hey! It's me!" he cried.
"Oh, sorry." She grabbed a heavy book off the nightstand and threw it at Aragorn, missing his face by maybe an inch and hitting the wall instead. Aragorn stared at the place where his head had been and back at her.
"Arwen, sweetheart, I don't understand."
She laughed coldly. "Oh, you don't understand, don't you? That's really rich Aragorn. Really, really rich." She picked up the lamp and tossed it, aiming directly between his legs. Aragorn gave a 'Yipe!' and dived away.
"What did I do?" he asked pitifully.
"You and LEGOLAS!" she screamed. "How could you??"
"WHAT?" Aragorn cried. "Me and L-what?? I never, ever... it's Legolas!"
"You liar! I know you did. Admit it!"
"I can't admit it, there's nothing to admit. It's LEGOLAS."
"I was watching them, and Legolas was going on and on about how much he missed his precious Aragorn. You lying, cheating BASTARD!" Arwen ran over and kicked her husband in the arse. Then she covered her mouth in shock as he disappeared.
~Back on earth~
The twins had somehow managed to coerce Erestor into one of the offices. They, along with Legolas, had taken it upon themselves to introduce Erestor to exactly what Teleporno Industries had to live up to.
"Oh m-my," he said, staring at the screen, horror-stricken. Legolas gave half a giggle, but his heart wasn't really into it as he still missed Aragorn. The twins shared malicious grins; revenge upon their old tutor was sweet.
"Shame Haldir had to miss this," Elladan muttered. "Where is he, anyway?"
"Celeborn transferred him. To Guatemala," Elrohir snickered.
"Do we even HAVE a chain in Guatemala?"
"We do now."
"Are there any other of these... stories that are not quite so... explicit?" Erestor asked. Elladan, Elrohir and Legolas all looked at each other.
"I don't know," Legolas admitted. "I've never checked."
Eventually they did find a story. One that began to depress Legolas anymore.
"B-but, my father would never do something like that," he protested, looking like a kicked puppy dog. "H-he loves me. He'd n-never s-s-sell me as a slave f-for treasure and j-jewels, w-would he?" His lower lip was beginning to quiver.
"Oh come on, Legolas," Elrohir assured him. "It's just a story. The elves don't even HAVE slaves, remember? How could he sell you as one?"
Legolas didn't look entirely convinced. "H-he does love me though, r-right? T-tell me he l-loves me. He'd n-never do that, r-right? I can't s-stand it if he d-doesn't l-love me either." Tears were beginning to well in Legolas' eyes.
"Oh, well done Erestor," Elladan growled. "Out of all the stories out there, you HAD to go and find one where Legolas' father beat him. We're trying to get his mind OFF his troubles, not add more."
Legolas, meanwhile, was trying to convince Elrohir that his father did, in fact, love him. Unfortunately, it was turning out to be Elrohir who did most of the convincing.
"A-ada loves me, r-right? He's n-never k-kicked or hit me, and he n-never would, r-right?"
At that moment, the object of their discussions entered the room. He was dressed in a black suit with a high collar. The white shirt beneath was ruffled and he wore a black tie. Black leather gloves covered his hands, and his long blond hair was tied back loosely. There was an odd look about him; as if he knew something the others did not. Putting on an innocent look, he moved toward them.
Legolas looked up, apparently not noticing the odd look his father had. "Ada, y-you love me, r-right?"
"Of course I do, Legolas," he assured his son. But he was not looking at Legolas. His sultry eyes were fixated on Erestor, who inched away rather nervously.
"King Thranduil, are you alright?" Elladan asked. Thranduil waved an arm impatiently.
"Of course! I'm fine." His eyes still hadn't left Erestor's face, who was looking more and more nervous.
Before anything more could be said, however, there was a large thump. All eyes turned to look at the disheveled figure that had just appeared in the corner. It was quiet for a moment as Aragorn looked up at them, grey eyes very confused.
"How did I get here?"
Nobody had a chance to answer, because Legolas took it upon himself to personally give Aragorn a very personal greeting.
"Aragorn!" he shrieked, leaping up and jumping on top of the former king of Gondor. He straddled his friend's stomach and began kissing him madly. Aragorn couldn't even speak; he was in shock.
The twins watched in bemusement for several long seconds, but decided it was probably time to intervene when Legolas began removing Aragorn's shirt. This, however, proved more difficult than first thought, as Legolas seemed very reluctant to relinquish his friend. Therefore, untangling Legolas from Aragorn required both twins full effort.
Which left Thranduil and Erestor.
Thranduil edged toward Erestor. Thranduil looked Erestor up and down and licked his lips. Erestor had the sense to quiver. He wasn't sure if it was the good kind of quiver, or the bad kind.
"They're rather preoccupied, wouldn't you say?" Thranduil asked. Erestor nodded, his eyes very wide. "Now, wouldn't you like to see what those... 'fics' are REALLY like?" sex-kitten Thranduil purred. Erestor nodded again, unable to do anything else. Erestor pounced on him, knocking him to the ground. He quickly removed his tie and used it to tie Erestor's hands behind his back. He sat up and looked around. Spying Aragorn's removed shirt a few feet away, he grabbed it and ripped off the sleeve, using it to gag Erestor. Then, slinging said elf over his shoulder, he left the room, looking very pleased with himself.
Twenty minutes, three ripped shirts, two swollen pairs of lips and one very nearly almost removed pair of breeches later, Elladan and Elrohir finally succeeded in removing Legolas from Aragorn. They were all breathing heavily (although Legolas and Aragorn for a very different reason) and Legolas looked very pleased with himself. Aragorn, on the other hand, looked traumatized for life.
"Explain?" he begged his foster brothers.
"That's rather difficult, as we're not exactly sure ourselves," Elrohir said, trying to hold back a squirming Legolas. "But we think it has something to do with the fics."
"Fics?" Aragorn repeated, looking confused. Elrohir sighed.
"We have A LOT to talk about."
Elladan, meanwhile, was looking around. "Where'd Thranduil and Erestor go?"