Getting My Buzz On
Author: Miklusca
Rating: R
Warnings: Language, Violence and drug use.
Disclaimer: I don't own Silent Hill 2
Feedback: Yes, I mean it!
Summary: Little comedy about James and Pyramid head getting high together.
James walked in the apartment room and seen that Pyramid dude killing one of those manniquine monsters. When he turned on him James almost pissed himself. Pyramid Head sniffed and stopped advancing on him. "You have some bud on you. I can smell it." There was drool coming from under the red plate and James backed away. "Uh...yes." Pyramid Head walked closer. "Give me some and you will live."
James took out a joint and gave it to the thing. Pyramid Head flopped down in a lazy boy. "Take a load off and give me a light." James gave him his lighter and sat in a chair next to him, pulling out a dubbie for himself. Pyramid Head lit and took a drag, passing the lighter back. He blew the smoke out from beneath his red thing. "That's good shit!" James sparked his joint, together they smoked.
After some time they were giggling and flailing around. "Man, I remember the first person I ever killed! I skinned that skanky ass!" Pyramid Head hooted and James laughed, clutching his joint, puffing on it. PH blew more smoke out. "So why are you here? If I'm assigned to kill you, you must have done something naughty." James took another hit and blew circles, both of their eyes bloodshot.
"I got a letter from my wife Mary, but she's been dead for 3 years. Wait was it? Oh shit. I can't remember how long. The thing is I just got sick and tired of her bitching about being ugly and pushing me away! So I iced the bitch with a pillow!"
They laughed together and James sucked on his joint. "I only came to see if it is her and maybe get a peice of ass!" They roared again and PH shouted at the TV. "I ain't talking to you bitch!" He goes over and smacks the set then humps it in a frenzy, James laughing all the while.
When PH was finished the TV was in powder and he sat back down. "That shut her ass up!" Just then Eddie walks in. "Hey what are you guys doing? Can I join?" PH slashed him in half with his Great Knife. "I was getting pretty sick and fucking tired of his fat ass!" He wipes off the blade and kicks the twitching blob halves.
PH sits back down and puffs out the rest of his joint. "Man I'm starving!" He spies Eddies corpse and starts to chomp on it. James gags and turns away. Maria walks in the door and James screams. "Mary!" He lunges and tackles, biting her throat out. "Oh God! I killed her again!" He jumps away as PH eats her corpse as well. "Go James! Go before the TuTu's come!" With that James ran all the way to his car and drove off. "Hwello? Where is everyone?" Laura was alone in the street looking for anyone with monsters approaching.
The End