Too Late?

Chapter 1/1

Disclaimers: I don't own any of these characters. Blah blah...you know the drill

Spoilers: This story is based on spoilers recently posted about the episode 'JAG San Diego'

Rating K

1730

Mac's Apartment

Georgetown

Mac pulled into her parking space in front of her apartment. It had been two days since she'd heard from Harm. He had taken leave to be near Mattie. She had been going over and over the last time she had seen him in her mind. She analyzed every expression, every nuance, trying to read what was in his heart. She had not seen him this way since they found out about his father. He was in so much pain then that her heart broke for him. He would not allow himself to lean on her too heavily then, either. He did not say it in words – it was just something she sensed, so she backed away.

She took her keys out of the ignition and got out of her car. She was so lost in thought she nearly forgot to lock up. Turning back toward her car, clicked her remote after she was halfway to the entrance to her apartment building.

As she walked she thought of her conversation with Commander McCool. Maybe she had been wrong when she said it wasn't too late. The commander had tried to encourage her not to give up, but old patterns were hard to break. She had wanted so much to be there for Harm and he had closed himself off again. Her first impulse was to withdraw and say nothing. She would not this time, though. Harm had stood by her when she knew it had to have hurt him. She could do no less for him.

She heaved a sigh as she put her key in the lock on her door. She opened her door and stepped inside. The flashing red light of her answering machine caught her eye. "Harm," she said aloud. She practically ran to the machine to listen to the message she hoped he had left for her. She pushed the button and nothing, there was no message. "Damn it, Harm…call me, will you?"

"I wanted to talk face to face this time," a voice gravelly with sleep spoke from the direction of the sofa. Harm's tall frame was stretched out on the sofa; he held one of the pillows in his arms and had hung one of his long legs off of the side.

Mac turned quickly toward him, barely able to believe what she was seeing.

"I'm sorry, Mac. I used my key. I know it was just for emergencies but I didn't want to stay in my apartment right now." He sat up slowly, wincing as he did.

"It's all right, Harm. How is Mattie? I know you wouldn't have left her if there hadn't been some improvement." Mac walked over to the sofa and sat down on the coffee table in front of him. The relief of seeing him was so strong it nearly made her weak in the knees. He had still trusted her enough to come to her after all.

"She's awake and they were able to take the respirator off. The doctor sounds a little more positive than he did earlier, but he still can't say for sure the extent of the damage to Mattie's spinal cord. He said that until the swelling around her spinal cord goes down, they won't be able to say for sure how much function she will actually have." Harm had been looking away from Mac when he was speaking. When he finished, he reached for her hand, and she took it in both of hers.

"Harm, she's going to be all right." Harm looked into her eyes, wanting to believe what she said was true. She hadn't seen the faces of the doctors and nurses taking care of Mattie. Their guarded looks and careful language when they talked of Mattie's future had spoken volumes to him.

Harm nodded, and Mac leaned in and kissed his cheek. "Come on. Let's get you off of this couch and I'll get some dinner started. You must be hungry." She stood and gave his hand a tug. Harm stood and stretched, again wincing in pain as he did. "Harm, you should have gone in my bedroom and stretched out. That couch was not made for sleeping, especially not for someone who is six feet four."

Harm continued to follow her into the kitchen. "I didn't want to intrude, Mac. I know I was pushing my luck when I let myself in here." He gave her his lopsided grin. He still looked so weary, his eyes puffy from lack of sleep and, Mac knew, worry.

"You should know better than that. My door is always open to you. If you didn't know that before, you should know that now." She frowned slightly. She thought they were getting closer; she had tried to tell him when she saw him last that she was there for him, no questions asked.

He stepped closer to her and she turned to face him. He slipped his hand into hers and gave it a squeeze. "I know, I just didn't want you to think I was taking our relationship for granted."

Mac smiled at him indulgently. "I'm not thinking that at all."

He lifted her hand to his lips and planted soft kisses to the palm of her hand. "Is there an 'us' now, Mac?"

She leaned in close to him, her heart in her eyes. "Yes…. there is an us." She kissed his cheek softly as he continued to kiss her palm. Harm turned his head toward her suddenly and kissed her deeply. Mac fell into the kiss, her arms linking around his neck, pulling him down closer as he lifted her up and into him. Mac felt both ease and intensity in his kiss. This was Harm, the one she had been waiting for, the man she loved.

He broke the kiss after a long moment. Looking down into her eyes with half closed lids, he kissed her lightly. "I have to go back tonight, Mac. I just came back to get a couple of changes of clothes and I wanted to see you."

"Do whatever you need to do, Harm. Can you at least stay long enough to have dinner?"

Mac did understand and she admired him all the more for his loyalty to Mattie. It gave her a secret thrill to know he thought of her too, in the midst of all that was happening now.

Harm loosened his embrace. "Why don't we go out to get something and I'll just leave from there? I'm all ready to go. I just wanted to see you before I left."

"Just let me get out of this uniform and I'll be ready to leave." Mac stepped out of his embrace and started toward her bedroom.

"Need any help?" He arched a brow, teasing her.

She chuckled and threw over her shoulder. "Don't tempt me, sailor."

Mac emerged from her bedroom in less than five minutes. She grabbed her keys and she and Harm walked toward the door.

"What do you think, Mac – Chinese?" Harm looked at her over his shoulder as they started down the stairs.

Mac shrugged. It really didn't matter to her. She was so happy that he had come to see her she would even have eaten tofu tonight.

"Maybe you should bring your car, Mac, and then I can just leave from the restaurant."

Harm raised his brows in question.

"Yeah, I can drive myself and I don't care where we eat." Mac smiled to herself. "I'll follow you wherever you want to go." She was thinking that her last statement was true; in more ways than one.

FIN