Daddy's Pants
Disclaimer: All things Buffy the Vampire Slayer belong to Joss Whedon. All things Harry Potter belong to JK Rowling. No money is being profited from this fic.
Summary: Do I have to explain it again? Basically, Xander knocks Ginny up during a one night stand.
"Blah" means speech
'Halb' means thoughts
All Grown Up
A/N: I realize these are short, but I was originally going to keep these as drabbles, so I kind of got stuck in the middle of a story and a drabble and came out with these short stories! And PLEASE REMEMBER people, this is a challenge, so anything you have to say, keep in mind, I'm just following directions!
Month Later
Xander landed haphazardly in a field. His travel buddy, Ginny landed on her feet gracefully.
"Show off," Xander said under his breath. He got up from the grass and brushed the dirt off his pants.
"There is where I used to live," Ginny pointed at a house that, to Xander, looked a little crooked. When he got a better look, he saw a face in one of the window's looking at Ginny and himself. The face quickly disappeared from view.
'Probably to get the cavalry,' Xander thought.
They walked closer to the house and when they stepped in front of the door, Xander started to get second thoughts about the whole plan. He didn't even remember agreeing to come here.
Flashback (One month earlier- Buffy's room)
"You have to meet my parents."
"You're a witch."
"Parents?" Xander freaked.
"Close enough to a demon magnet for me," Buffy said with a triumphant look on her face.
Ginny looked at the people confused. She had just been outed as a witch to three Muggles, but they didn't seem to care.
"You don't care that I'm a witch?" Ginny asked looking at the three people in turn.
"Should we?" Buffy asked. "Willow's a witch, so, no big there."
Ginny turned to Willow. She couldn't sense anything from her at all. Maybe she had barriers up.
"Did you go to Hogwarts?"
"Hog what now?" Buffy asked for Willow.
"I trained myself, but I recently found out about the schools for witchcraft and wizardry. But unlike you, I don't use a wand," Willow said softly.
Ginny couldn't believe what she was hearing. A self-trained Wicca was unheard of. The control Willow must have must be incredible.
"Since we got that out of the way, I have to meet your parents?" Xander asked.
"Yea, and my brothers, of course," Ginny said thinking.
"Brothers, as in older, as in, could probably hex me or something since I got their sister pregnant?"
Ginny let a nervous chuckle. "Well, I don't think they would do that much to you. Actually, considering the brain power they could put together, they could do some damage."
"How many are we talking here?" Buffy asked.
"Well, there's Bill, my oldest brother. He's a curse breaker in Egypt at the moment. Then, Charlie, who works with dragons in Romania. Next is Percy, but don't worry about him. The family forgot about him a long time ago. Then the twins, who could probably kill you without you expecting it to happen. Last is Ron, who is the most protective."
"Six?" Xander whispered. "You have six brothers?"
"Think of it as five," Willow tried to help. "At least the butt whooping will hurt a little less if there are only five."
"Not helping, Will. I said you should have gayed me up. Maybe this situation wouldn't be happening."
"Keep in mind that we mentioned that male demons would come after you!" Buffy chirped in. "Would rather have impregnated someone like Clem?"
The image in Xander's head made him want to gag. The thought of Clem having Xander's child inside his stomach was enough to do that to anyone.
"Or, would you rather be pregnant by Clem's child? I can't even begin to think about where the baby would come out." Willow started to think to herself.
"Fine! I'll meet your family, but the quicker the better, so I can get away from these two," Xander said pointing in the direction of Willow and Buffy, who looked hurt from Xander's comment.
"Geez, if you're moody now, we can only image what you would be like with a child in your stomach."
Present Day
'Oh right, I was disgusted so much that I said the first thing that came to my mind to get out of the room.'
"They do know about me at least, right?" Xander asked, noticing that this house was sheltered from all others. To Xander, that meant that no one would hear him scream. Even if people did, these were witches and wizards.
"They know that I have met someone," Ginny started, "just not about that other thing."
Ginny knocked on the door to signal her arrival and made her way inside the house. Xander looked around in approval. She told him about the house, but seeing it in person was even better. Everything here was magical; even he could sense it. The best feature of the house was their pseudo clock. Instead of showing time, it had the entire family on it and what they were up to. Xander thought the Council could use something like that. Though, when he thought about it, their would be too many people on the clock and the hands would always be pointing to mortal peril… That or at work.
"Ginny!" a woman came down the stairs yelling. "I've missed you so much."
Xander knew this was Mrs. Weasley. Everything about her gave off a mom vibe, something Xander never truly had.
"You must be Xander," Mrs. Weasley said after giving Ginny a bone crushing hug. "We've heard, well actually, not that much about you."
"That is what makes me an enigma, I guess," Xander joked.
Mrs. Weasley only smiled before turning back to the staircases. "They're here, everyone!"
Xander had hoped to meet the family one by one, but soon, he was lost in a sea of red heads.
Even the busiest Weasley's seemed to make the trip to see Xander. Bill and Charlie were the first to introduce themselves. They shook Xander's hand firmly, showing him they weren't letting go of Ginny without a fight. They were able to keep their threats subtle. He met Ron next. Xander received the same treatment from him, but the twins, though older than Ron, were still a bit immature.
"I'm George, he's Fred," George said pointed to his twin.
"Would you like to try some of our candy?" Fred opened his hand to Xander.
Xander looked confused, but reached for the candy, thinking the family had accepted him. He wasn't able to take anything as Ginny slapped the candy from Fred's hand.
"Watch it!" George yelled as he bent down to collect the candy. "Do you know how long we worked to get it just right?"
Ginny gave an uncaring look to George and turned to Xander. "Never accept anything from the twins. They run a joke shop and their candy is one of their bigger revenues. Depending on what you eat, things can and will happen to you."
George was going to defend Fred and himself, but their mother had announced that dinner was ready.
They ate outside; Mrs. Weasley was at the head of one end of the table. Ginny sat at the first chair next to her mother, where Xander sat on her right. Next to Xander was Ron, and the twins sat across from Ginny and Xander.
"So Xander, do you work at the Ministry?" Mrs. Weasley began to pry.
"Well, I uh," Xander tried to think of a lie.
"He works for the Council, mum," Ginny answered. "You know, with the slayers."
"Slayers?" Ron questioned intrigued.
Xander smiled and nodded. 'I got one of the brothers on my side.'
"Yea, my best friend was the original slayer before the others were all called," Xander gloated.
"Wicked," Ron said nodding.
"I'm sure it's a lovely job," Mrs. Weasley smiled. "What do you do there?"
"I'm usually out of the battle, that's for the slayers. I'm usually doing the construction, or traveling and recruiting new slayers or battling or helping different kinds of animals."
"What kind of animals?" Charlie asked.
"Well, usually demons, but some mythical animals or just not normal things. Trolls, nymphs, dragons, mummies."
Both Charlie and Bill's head shot up from their plates. "Dragons?"
"Well, not a lot, but we have come in contact with a few," Xander smiled. 'One more under my belt.'
"I work in Egypt as a curse breaker, maybe the tombs I've been in you've come in contact with a mummy there?" Bill asked
"Maybe, but I try to stay away from anything that has to do with mummies. It's a very long, complicated story."
Xander knew he had, once again, made another friend in the Weasley family. He turned his attention back toward the twins. He wasn't sure how he was going to get on their good side. They were all alike, but that didn't help much.
'What would make them not want to kill me?' Xander thought. 'If I was in their position, what would make me satisfied?'
Xander knew what he had to do. He held his hand out, knowing the brothers would know what the gesture meant. They handed him a piece of candy, the challenge presented in their eyes.
Xander took the candy, examined it, and threw it in his mouth. It had a weird taste to it, but the next thing Xander knew what that he felt himself falling backward.
Inside the Weasley Home
Xander woke up on the Weasley's couch. He opened his eyes only to see stars. He rubbed his eyes and the stars were gone, though he still felt a little disoriented.
"What happened?" he asked sluggishly.
"You got our approval," Fred said.
"That's for sure," George finished.
"Try acting your age," Mrs. Weasley said. "Of all the things to do you give him one your candies."
While Mrs. Weasley scolded the twins, Ginny sat beside Xander.
"The candy they gave you is a big hit among the children of Hogwarts. Basically, they make you faint long enough for the professor to take you to get revived.
"And how long would that be?" Xander asked.
"Roughly about 15 minutes," she smiled. She leaned over and kissed Xander on the lips. He returned it, but was interrupted by someone clearing their throat.
The two separated and found Mr. and Mrs. Weasley giving them a worried look.
"Are you sure that you're alright?" Mrs. Weasley.
"It would take more than that to stop me," Xander said bravely.
"Well, since we're done with that, you can tell us what the big news is that Ginny spoke about," Mr. Weasley said.
"And that would be what it takes to stop me," Xander said lamely.
Ginny smiled and took a deep breath. "Xander and I have decided to get married."
Mrs. Weasley smiled, but that was all. It seemed as if the smile she had earlier was stuck on her face at the news of her daughter's engagement. "But you can't!" she finally yelled.
Ginny shot her a hurt look.
"What I mean, dear, is that you've only just met Xander. People who rush into marriages are either in lust with each other or..." Mrs. Weasley stopped and looked at Ginny's stomach.
The rest of the family looked from Mrs. Weasley's eyes to the direction they were pointing. Realization came upon their faces; actually, Ron still didn't get it.
"What's everyone looking at? Why are you all fascinated with her stomach?"
"She's pregnant, Ronnikins," Fred answered.
Mrs. Weasley looked as if she were going to faint. Mr. Weasley obviously saw this and put a comforting arm around her shoulders.
"I don't know what to say, but, I do admire the fact that you aren't abandoning my daughter," Mr. Weasley said.
"I wouldn't dream of it," Xander looked at Ginny.
Xander looked at the sons of the family. He had hoped the friendship he made at dinner still existed. Ron just looked confused about the whole situation, so Xander hoped nothing bad would happen. The two eldest brothers were, at first, angry about what Xander did. They then found themselves remembering the great conversation they had with Xander, so they quickly congratulated him.
Xander looked at the twins and their faces were void of any emotion. They looked at each other and Xander figured they were doing some silent twin language. They looked back at Xander and Fred held out his hand. In it, was a wrapped piece of candy.
The wrapping led no indication as to what the candy did. Xander knew this was the only way to get their acceptance. He took the candy from Fred's hand and threw the piece into his mouth. The taste to this one was foul and almost made Xander's eyes water.
He swallowed it as fast as he could and waited for something to happen. He felt nothing and thought that it was a little strange that no effects were being felt.
"You'll find what you need on the next floor up," George smiled devilishly.
"Please don't tell me you gave him THAT?" Ginny yelled.
Xander was going to protest, saying nothing was wrong, but something was indeed wrong with him. He grabbed his stomach and remembered the words that George said.
"I can't believe you fed him the diarrhea one, Fred!" Ginny complained.
"Hey, we accept him now, so that should be all that matters, right?" George asked.
"Mom!" Ginny yelled.
She expected to be defended, but Mrs. Weasley was crying hysterically.
"My baby is all grown up and getting married! Not to mention she's having a baby!" Mrs. Weasley sobbed.
Ginny looked at the rest of her family, only to find they were either laughing at what happened to Xander or acting like her mother and reminiscing to when Ginny was still a little girl.
'Do I really want to raise my child around these crazy people?' Ginny asked herself. 'But then again, what would the Weasley family be without some crazy in it?"
The End of Daddy's Pants
My first finished story! What do you think? And, remember, this is a challenge I took, so be nice to me! It really was a good challenge to do, though.
My next story will be Ascension, a Buffy/Dark Angel cross, if you're interested. Should be posted sometime next month or something like that!