A/N: Hello peeple, ve're back! Ve come vid tidinks of great joy. A new chapter for you all to read! It's my 17th birthday today! YAY! This is my gift to you people for my birthday. I would appreciate a few reviews…if it wouldn't be too much trouble…please…for me…
Disclaimer: Anyone breathes a word of this to J.K. Rowling, and you will die. Don't sue me for complete desecration of her characters and alternate world. We just like to have a bit of fun.
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Chapter 3: Lost Yet Again
The two girls burst through the doorway of the Durmstrang castle, followed close behind by a host of Durmstrang students and Karkaroff. Milena was shouting at Andréa as they ran towards the forest.
"Dis is all your fault," she cried.
"My fault?" asked Andréa. "Vhat do you mean my fault? Dis is your fault!"
"My fault?" cried Milena.
"Ja," said Andréa. "You vere de vun who suggest ve should go down road in de first place."
"But you vere de vun who say: 'let's go into big scary forest in meedle of novhere. AT NIGHT!"
"It vas not scary," retorted Andréa. "Ve're still here; ve veren't eaten."
"But now ve in dis mess!" yelled Milena. "And who's fault vas dat again?"
"Yours! Not mine, yours!" said Andréa. "Because –"
"Dis is neider de time, nor de place for dis discussion," said Milena.
"You started it," said Andréa. "And it's your –"
"Shut up and run, you eediot!" yelled Milena.
They glanced back at the crowd following them. They were gaining on the girls. Karkaroff was glaring menacingly at them as he led the chase.
"Ve're never goink to escape dem if ve run," said Milena. "Dey know exactly vhere ve're goink."
"Ve need to Apparate," suggested Andréa.
"Vhy is dat your answer for everyteenk? It hasn't vorked yet. Ve alvays end up in meedle of novhere, or in very dangerous situation; like now."
"Vun last try; to Hogsmeade," said Andréa. "It's not like ve have a choice."
"True."
As they ran, the two focused hard on Apparating, while still fearing capture by the mob following close behind. They felt themselves moving at a terrific pace and seconds later, stop somewhere. Slowly, cringingly, the girls opened their eyes and looked around.
"VE DID IT!" screamed Andréa. "VE ARE IN HOGSMEADE!"
The girls began dancing around in circles, laughing together. They stopped after a few minutes and looked around at their surroundings. They were standing in a large, snow-covered square with only a handful of people walking around. Some of them were looking at the girls with odd expressions on their faces, but most ignored them. They could see everyone was warmly dressed, with heavy cloaks and coats on. A sudden gust of icy cold wind blew up, covering the two with snow and leaving them shivering.
"Ve should have packed varm clothes," said Andréa.
"Ve should have vorn varm clothes," corrected Milena. "My arse has frozen off, I svear."
"Vhat are you complainink about?" said Andréa. "I'm de vun vid the skimpy outfit."
"And who's fault is dat?" asked Milena.
"It's alvays my fault, isn't it," said Andréa crossly.
"Vell, yes, actually," said Milena simply.
She looked around again at their surroundings and frowned.
"I don't teenk ve're in Scotland," said Milena at last.
"Vhy?"
"Because, it's summer dere at de moment," she said.
"Really? What's the difference between winter and summer?"
"There is one, on some days." Milena defended.
"Right," said Andréa. "Den vhere are ve?"
Milena looked around again, studying the odd-looking buildings and sparse vegetation.
"Ve are – I don't know," she said. "Give me your phone."
"No."
"Yes."
"Vhy?"
"Because."
"No."
Milena held up her wand.
"Fine."
Andréa handed her phone over to Milena, who stared at it for some time before handing it back. Her expression was calm, but forced. Andréa watched her lips twitch as she turned to face her.
"Ve are in SIBERIA!"
"And it's my fault," said Andréa.
"JA!"
"How is it my fault?"
"It's alvays your fault! Who vas de vun who say: 'let's see who's home'?"
"Vell who vas de vun who suggest ve knock in first place?"
"Ve vouldn't have had to knock if it veren't for you!"
"Vhat did I do? Ve vere Apparating. It vas your fault too."
"Let's not start dis again."
"You started it."
Milena silently counted to ten.
"Shut up and let me teenk. Ve are in de meedle of novhere, again again."
"Vell, look on de bright side," said Andréa.
"VHAT BRIGHT SIDE?! VE IN FARKINK SIBERIA!" yelled Milena.
"At least Karkaroff von't find up here," consoled Andréa.
"No, he von't," said Milena. "Because he don't teenk ve are dat DUMB!"
"He don't teenk ve're dat dumb," said Andréa. "He know ve're dat dumb."
"Vell, he know dat you are dat dumb," said Milena. "Dis is de seexteenth time ve have been lost dis veek!"
"Seventeenth," corrected Andréa.
"And you're farkink countink!" yelled Milena.
She stared around her for a time, looking for something or someone to help them. There were a few boys walking along, near them. Milena saw an opportunity to ask for assistance, and redeem herself after the incident on the island.
"I'll go and see if dey know anyvhere dat ve can get back to Europe," she said. "Safely," she added, as Andréa opened her mouth to dispute, but promptly closed it again.
"I should talk to dem," said Andréa.
"Vhy?" demanded Milena.
"Because, you might screw up again, like you did vhen ve vere in Hippogriffy, or vhatever," she said.
"But I'm de vun who speak native langvage of dis country," said Milena.
"I speak Russian too," said Andréa.
"Ja, but I am Russian," said Milena. "And dey get offended by people who vear exposing clothes."
"Dey don't look offended to me!" cried Andréa. "Vhy you teenk I vear exposink clothes. Dey're cute, and dere's four of dem. Mama is always telling you to share!"
Milena approached the boys casually and began conversing with them in a friendly manner. Andréa stood watching from a distance. Milena seemed to be enjoying this. She was laughing and joking with them, in what could be called a familiar way. Andréa tapped her foot impatiently, glaring and waiting. Finally, Milena finished and returned to her friend.
"Took you long enough," said Andréa.
"Vell, dey vere old friends," explained Milena.
"Friends? You have friends?"
"Shut up," she said. "Remember vhen I vent to boardink school in Siberia?"
"Ja, Excuse me a moment" said Andréa, snorting with laughter, "HAHA"
"And you vere payink me out."
Andréa nodded and coughed, suppressing a laugh.
"Dey vere some of de boys dere."
Andréa's eyes opened wide and she glared icily at Milena.
"I hate you. Dat's not fair."
Milena shrugged her shoulders and smirked.
"Do I care?"
There was a silence between them as Andréa waited expectantly.
"So?" she said finally. "Did you find out how ve can get out of here?"
"Ve catch the Knight Bus," she said. "Simple."
"Vhy deedn't ve teenk of dat before now?" asked Andréa. "Ve vould be at Hogvarts by now."
"I know," said Milena. "But who vas de vun who keep sayink 'let's Apparate'?"
"But ve can't catch Knight Bus to Hogsmeade," said Andréa. "I still maintain dat ve Apparate."
"Vell, can ve at least try to get Knight Bus?"
"No," said Andréa. "Ve need to get to Hogvarts, and ve don't have time to vait for de farkink bus."
"Fine. Vun last try, but if ve don't get dere, ve're takink de bus."
"Deal."
The girls moved away from the main square, and into a secluded space where they could not be seen. Closing their eyes, they visualised the scene of Hogsmeade, and focused. The rushing sensation lasted only seconds, and when they opened their eyes, they saw.
It was a large village, with many men and women wandering the streets, peering through windows. They all wore robes, and it was late afternoon. Andréa and Milena stared at the odd looking buildings scattered and cluttered together around the square.
"Dis look like Hogsmeade," said Milena.
"I teenk ve made it."
"I hope ve made it."
Andréa walked over to a lady who was standing nearby, not far from a shop window, in which were several strange items.
"Excuse me," she said. "Is dis Hogsmeade?"
"Yes, it is," said the woman.
Andréa turned back to Milena and gave her two thumbs up, and running back.
"Ve're here! Ve're here!" she cried, dancing up and down. "Ve made it!"
A massive grin spread across Milena's face. She joined Andréa and began to dance around the square, chanting 've made it!' all the way. When they had become tired, they stopped dancing.
"But how do ve get to Hogvarts?" asked Andréa.
"Ve follow the road back up," said Milena, pointing her finger at a road that led down into the village centre. A sign pointed back up the road.
"Oh," said Andréa. "Ok."
They set off up the long road, walking for a time, still dancing a little. They went along the road, past the occasional tree. The mountains rose up around them. Still they walked, confident that they would arrive at the castle soon.
Hours passed. They were still walking. It was getting darker and darker. The trees around them swayed in the wind. The road had sloped downwards now. A huge lake came into sight, and beyond it, an enormous castle. It was several storeys high and had large towers. The windows were lit with bright lights. The Quidditch pitch could be seen in the distance, and a tree was standing not far from it, alone. A large, dark forest stretched out on one side of the grounds.
"Dis place is huge," said Andréa.
"Durmstrang vas noteenk to dis," said Milena.
"Don't let Karkaroff hear dat," giggled Andréa. "He very sensitive about dat stuff, short man syndrome… and I'm not talking about his height."
They both laughed.
"Come on," said Andréa. "Ve're almost dere."
"Tank got."
"Qvit dat."
"It vas your fault."
"Don't start dat again."
The girls came to the large oak doors and knocked…
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A/N: Vell, finally ve make it to Hogvarts, ve hope at least. Next chapter, vhat vill happen to us vhen ve valk through dose doors? Vait and see! REVIEW! GIVE A VUNDERFUL BIRTHDAY PRESSIE FOR YOUR FAVOURITE AUTHOR!!!
"Your fault it took so long" KK is pouting.
"No… um, well, it is sort of, but DENIAL ISN'T JUST A RIVER IN EGYPT!" And Lisa has obviously decided to move there!
"Shuddup"
Thank yous:
Eowyn – Thanks Nell, I thought the chocolate bit was a bit odd, but still funny (and besides, we're all odd)
FrostDragoness – Hey Frosty, great that you liked it. Funnier than my usual stuff. I'll catch up with you before the end of the holidays hopefully.
spiritlandez – I'm glad you don't think our characters are Mary Sues. We've been trying to make them as un-Mary Sue-ish as possible ;) and we hope they never get to be Mary Sues. God, how sad would that be. Lol.
hids – I knew that was you, Franni. Hope you did well in your history speech. KK and I have been writing Chapter 4, so it should be up soon.