Summary: Mid-BIAG. Rory ends the 'no-strings' with Logan and they go back to being friends yet are farther apart than ever. A new arrival forces Rory to figure out her infatuation with Logan and forces Logan to realize he missed out on something great. Features the usual cast of Yale characters.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters from Gilmore Girls; they are property of the WB, Amy Sherman-Palladino, Hofflund-Polone and Dorothy Drank Here Productions.

A/N: Another R/L story when I should be working on Nothing Like You and I (I'm working on reworking some of the plot at the moment, though I'm plagued by writer's block too). This plot has been buzzing around my head since the 'But I'm A Gilmore' episode aired. It's probably starts out along the same lines as the plethora of other 'what if' fics out there, but after that, it's completely different.

I think Rory and Logan really need to earn each other before starting a serious relationship - meaning Rory has to figure out why she's so heavily infatuated with Logan and Logan has to find out why he needs only Rory - so this is my attempt at that. Note that some of the dialogue in this chapter is borrowed from BIAG. The chapter title is from a song of the same name by Feist. Listen to it if you can, it perfectly embodies where R/L is at in this chapter.

The Reason Why

Prologue: Let It Die

"I can't do this anymore Logan," her words came out quickly, she wasn't sure she could say them otherwise.

"Do what?"

"This casual dating thing. I don't like it. It's not who I am and I don't want to make it who I am," Rory explained, wincing from the hangover that had her emptying her stomach contents over a toilet for most of the night. She was feeling understandably crabby and wanted to blurt out her decision as fast as possible so she could go to bed.

"Whoa, hold on here. Where's this coming from?" He looked understandably surprised, which is why she supposed she had dropped it on him like this. If he had forewarning, he would be prepared with his utterly charming personality and she would lose the nerve to end whatever they had.

"It's coming from me. The ravishing creature standing in front of you," she remarked dryly, fully aware she probably looked anything but ravishing. Her hair was askew, her face pallid and she was still in yesterday's clothes. She didn't even want to think about how she smelled.

"We talked about this."

"I know."

"I didn't make you do this."

"I know. I'm not accusing you of anything. This isn't your fault."

"I don't understand. I thought everything was going so well."

She laughed hollowly, "What are you talking about? I haven't heard from you in a week." Was that his definition of well?

"I was busy. I had some friends in town, and…"

Those lines were blurring again, he sounded like he was committed fully to her. He wasn't, any delusions she held about that possibility were nonexistent at this point. "You know what? It doesn't matter. You're not my boyfriend, you don't owe me any explanations. I just don't want to be one of the many anymore."

"Oh, Rory, come on!" His protest was cut short by Lanny, who had come to tell Logan he had a call from some girl named Cassandra. It was just reaffirming her decision to end their arrangement.

"Go call Cassandra back. We're done here," she calmly stated, proud of how composed she appeared.

"How are we done here?"

"I said everything I have to say."

"Which is what?"

"I'm a girlfriend girl, Logan. I have boyfriends, not escorts," she replied. That was the difference wasn't it? She was not like the harem of women Logan had listed in his PDA. She tried and failed leaving her with the short end of the stick.

"Ah," he said, a look of realization dawning on his face. He began pacing back and forth in front of her, which wasn't helping her nauseous state.

"I thought I could be different, but I can't. I'm sorry. Maybe we can just go back to being friends again."

"Or maybe we can become boyfriend and girlfriend, right?" He retorted sounding atypically worked up.

"What?" She was too exhausted to comprehend his sudden anger.

"I get it. I get what you're doing."

"I'm not doing anything."

"Hey, if that's what you want then just come out and say it. But you coming in here and issuing an ultimatum…"

"I am not issuing an ultimatum!" She almost forgot how argumentative he could be. Damn it, why couldn't he just accept her decision!

"That's not what I heard."

"I said let's be friends!" Rory reiterated, her frustration building steadily.

"That's not what you meant!"

She groaned and dropped her head into her hands. Of all the times he chose to figure out if her words held any double meaning… "It is what I meant! There's no 'Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus' subtext here, Logan. I can't do this 'no-strings' deal anymore. I tried and it's not working for me."

"Rory, come on…" His tone is weak and she knows she is so close to getting him to concede.

"I'm being honest, we both know this isn't going anywhere. You aren't the boyfriend type, I was stupid to even entertain that possibility. We shouldn't force something that's obviously not going to work."

"Ace…" She can see the growing resignation in his eyes.

"Logan, I'm giving you an easy out…so please just take it. We should go back to being only friends, I mean it's not like I can avoid you..." There is a prolonged pause while she waits for any sort of reaction on his part. He can only nod and she takes this as acceptance. "Okay, I'll see you around." She brushes a gentle, goodbye kiss across his cheek and is gone a second later, leaving him standing in the empty common room.

88888

That was a month ago. She had properly mourned the end of their no-strings arrangement like she had for her other serious, committed relationships by donning pajamas, scarfing down ice cream and watching movies non-stop.

During this wallowing period, she had wondered what it was about Logan that attracted her like a moth to a flame. They were different to say the least, which was evident from the start. She had him pegged as a supercilious, spoiled blueblood with too much charm for his own good. While she wasn't far off the mark, he had somehow redeemed himself in her eyes, changing from a butt-faced miscreant to someone she actually lusted over and embarrassingly pursued. He challenged her views, her ways and forced her out of her shell. Ultimately, Logan was just too different and too dangerous to the fragile state of her heart. She could only give him so much of herself before she disappeared completely. So she had cut her losses, ending the arrangement before she ceded too much to him.

Lane had always told her she had it easy in the love department. Had being the operative word. She supposed that was true with Dean and Jess to an extent. They had always made the first move, going nine-tenths of the way before forcing her to make the last move by reciprocating. Things with Logan were completely different. She had been the one to push and make the sacrifices until she couldn't anymore, not without feeling like she had compromised some greater part of herself. He pushed her to her limits with everything, including sex, showing her the benefits of his lackadaisical outlook on life. She wondered if it was this difference – his relaxed attitude versus her inhibited attitude – that made her fall so hard, that made her foolishly commit to a casual relationship. Was it only Logan, with his worldly, cavalier charm and commanding affluence, who could do this to her? Or could anyone – at least, anyone who had a radically different take on life – make her fall as deeply?

Little did she know that she would have the chance to answer that very question.

It's been a month since Rory Gilmore unexpectedly ended their 'no-strings' agreement. Logan should have seen it coming, but he was always a little over his head with her. He could admit he was out of depth with her experience in serious relationships. He was relaxed and carefree, not bothering with labels or commitments, which in the end, mattered to her. She always seemed to have such high expectations of him, but not so much that it was annoying or demanding. It was just right. But he had been oblivious to her needs, figuring it was fine that he didn't call her for a week. While he was understandably preoccupied with visiting friends, he was also scared out of his wits. He was scared of the possessiveness he felt when he saw her with Robert and scared of his need to be with her all the time. Those were foreign emotions, things he only felt with her. And that confused the hell out of him.

He didn't want to end it with Rory, but she had been so adamant that he had to relent. He had agreed to a 'no-strings' relationship disregarding their essential differences at her insistence. So it seemed fitting to end it on her terms as well. He knows he misses her; he's just not sure in what capacity. He sees her a lot less than he used to. They'll hang out together but never alone. She's become better friends with Stephanie, Colin and Finn now, meaning she's pretty much in with his group. Not that it bothers him. He likes the fact that she fits in so seamlessly with his friends, but it pains him to have her so close. He's constantly reminded of the emotions he felt when with her and the loss of their intimacy.

Since she ended things, it's been the usual rotation of interchangeable girls for Logan. Cassandra, Whitney, Becca… it's whichever girl is free, whoever fits his current mood. Yet, things are not quite the same and Logan can't figure out why or what to do about it.

If he only knew that soon he would be faced with some competition and interesting circumstances that would put things into perspective.

A/N: Next Chapter:

The new arrival is introduced and he has interesting ties to Rory's new group of friends.

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