And Still
By
Ellie O'Hara
Standard Disclaimer: TPTB own Trek and all subsidiaries. I'm just playing with them for a while. The song "And Still" is the property of Reba McEntire. I'd just like to thank another talented red head for the use of her wonderful song and the muse that followed. This story is set about a year and a half after the events in Nemesis.
Please note this story is NC-17 (USA) and 18 & over (UK). You have been warned.
A note of thanks to Karen Page for Beta-in this 'Thingy,' I know it must have been a mammoth task.
The sun shone down on the busy street as Beverly Crusher lazily strolled in and out of the Parisian boutiques. It had been a long time since she had treated herself to such an indulgent day. She had begun her shore leave by having her hair styled and her nails manicured before she began her trawl through the Parisian fashions.
Beverly's eyes were drawn instantly to the green silk negligee hanging in the store window. She couldn't remember the last time she had owned something so truly sexy. Beverly entered the store, "Bonjour Madam, Est-ce que je puis essayer la robe verte?" The assistant smiled at Beverly's attempt to speak her native tongue.
"Oui Madam" replied the assistant. The older woman removed the fine silk negligee from the window and ushered Beverly to the changing room.
Beverly stood in front of the full-length mirror admiring the way the fabric covered her body. The breath inhaled by the assistant was enough to secure Beverly's purchase.
Jean Luc Picard had found himself more and more despondent since his crew had moved on with their careers in Starfleet. He had never expected them to put their careers on hold to remain on the Enterprise, however he had never truly objected whenever they had turned down advancement. Will Riker was a prime example. There were three occasions, he could remember, that Will had turned down his own command and Jean Luc knew if it hadn't been for him marrying Deanna, he may have remained with the Enterprise forever.
The biggest shock however had been Beverly. Jean Luc had never expected her to leave him. He knew the post of Head of Starfleet Medical was vacant again; nonetheless he had never entertained the idea that she would actually leave him again. Maybe it had been arrogance on his part, but he had thought her return after one year's tenure had been because of him. Why would she leave again? Jean Luc glanced cautiously over his coffee cup to his breakfast companion. For a brief moment he could have sworn that he was sitting across from Beverly. His companions red hair grazed her porcelain skin and made her blue eyes shine. It was a comparison he couldn't help make, but also one that would get him into lots of trouble someday.
Jean Luc's companion caught his gaze and smiled. "How's your breakfast Jean Luc?" she asked smiling.
"Wonderful darling, no one replicates like you," he replied jokingly.
Jean Luc had met Antoinette on Starbase 85 six months previously. Antoinette had sat next to him at the retirement dinner for Admiral Nakamura. Her appearance, wit and love of dancing had reminded him of Beverly and he had latched onto her for the evening, allowing him to live in a four-hour fantasy. The next day he had bumped into his dance partner as she left the lecture she was holding at the academy's exobiology symposium. One lunch and a dinner later and the couple had become the hottest gossip in Star Fleet. That was six months ago and Jean Luc and Antoinette had now been married for two days.
Antoinette had been watching Jean Luc for longer than he had known. Every now and again he would disappear into his own little world, one that she had yet to find the key too. She was scared; she had seen the look on Jean Luc's face when he thought she wasn't looking. He had lost a great deal recently and she wasn't sure that she was enough to fill the gap left by his friends. Of course they had all kept in contact with him, however it was only after his talks with Dr Crusher, that he felt the need to walk in the arboretum or loose himself in one of his dusty old books. Antoinette had worried when Jean Luc proposed, that they were moving to fast. She knew the gossips would pounce on the news, that one of Starfleet's most eligible bachelors was getting married, but her love for him had clouded her mind and she had allowed her heart to rule her head. It was only now she realised that Jean Luc had been running from something or someone and had collided with her.
"I was wondering Jean Luc, would you mind terribly if we went to La Barre for our honeymoon. I would love to see where you grew up. Maybe we could take in some of the French coast too," Antoinette asked. 'And maybe I can banish some of your ghosts?' she thought.
"I think that would be a wonderful idea my love. I will contact Marie to find out if she would mind us visiting. Maybe we could even spend several days in Paris?" Jean Luc rose and placed his dishes in the receptacle. Coming around the table he leaned down and enjoyed a lingering kiss with his new bride. "I better get off to the bridge darling. Have a good day Ma Belle," he said. Enjoying one last kiss he turned and left to begin his day.
Jean Luc sat at the controls of the captain's yacht making minute adjustments to their course to Earth, before he set the computer on autopilot and joined his new bride on the sofa.
Antoinette passed Jean Luc a cup of Earl Grey. "I hope I can meet some of your friends whilst we are on earth Jean Luc. You've told me so much about them I feel as though I already know them."
Jean Luc deliberately took a large mouthful of tea before answering. "I'm sure they would love to meet you. In fact, he said gathering some excitement that scared Antoinette. "I may be able to gather some of my old friends. How about a small gathering at the vineyard? I'm sure Marie wouldn't mind. In fact I'm sure she would love to meet them all herself. I will contact them all immediately."
One hour later the small light indicating a message bleeped silently on the communications terminal at Starfleet Medical.
Will and Deanna Riker slowly walked from the small transport station to the entrance of the Picard Vineyard. The sun shone across the vast field of grapes that stretched on for miles. "It's intoxicating," Will said as he turned to Deanna
"I now know why the Captain has held onto it for all these years Will. It can't be easy to manage a vineyard from space." Deanna replied. "This view makes it all worthwhile."
It didn't take long for the couple to reach the main house. Its effortless splendour made them feel as though they had stepped back in time.
The couple were broken from their reverie by the calling of their names from the main house. "Deanna, Will, I'm so glad you could make it. Come in. Come in. We were wondering what had happened to you both," said the Captain.
"I took the lazy route, via the transporter," laughed the Enterprise's Chief Engineer.
"Please come inside, I hope you like your room. It's not much to look at, but believe me, the bed is extremely comfortable." Jean Luc ushered the group into his home. "You will be in the bedroom to the back, Geordi can show you the way. If you will forgive me I have some business to attend to in the vineyard. I shouldn't be long."
Geordi showed the couple to the room they would be using for the next two days; but before they had even reached their bedroom, Deanna sensed growing unease in Geordi. "Care to share Geordi?" she asked. "I know something's wrong."
"Nothing is wrong Deanna, honestly. The captain just has some 'news' for everyone and I think I should leave it to him to tell you. It's not my place to tell you," said Geordi.
"Are you sure nothing is wrong Geordi?" said Will, concerned.
"I'm positive nothing is wrong with me. I'm really sorry folks, but as I said this news, should be delivered by the Captain," said Geordi with a hint of anger. "Have any of you heard from Beverly recently?
"I'm sorry Geordi we haven't. With everything that has happened, I think she just needed a break. Some time to herself." said Deanna.
"Well I hope the captain at least told Beverly his news, before he invited her here." Geordi turned and headed back downstairs leaving the couple to only imagine what was going on.
Before he reached the door, he turned back to his friends; "Oh and please don't take to long you two. I don't want to be left on my own down there." With that, Geordi left them to ponder on what news their friend was about to spring on them.
If Geordi hadn't already asked about Beverly, Deanna and Will would both have mistaken the woman cutting flowers at the kitchen sink, as the new Head of Starfleet Medical. The woman, from behind was identical in every way. As the couple descended the stairs the figure turned and revealed a face quite dissimilar to that of Beverly Crusher. She had none of Beverly's pretty features. Her eyes were dull and her hair, no matter how much a match for colour had no life and hung limply on the woman's shoulders. She also looked older than Beverly, the years had not been kind to Antoinette. "You must be Will and Deanna! Jean Luc has told me so much about you," Antoinette said cheerfully.
Will thought to Deanna "It's a pity we can't say the same Imzadi. Who is she?"
Antoinette had seen the quickly concealed looks of confusion; the husband and wife had shared. She could not understand why though, because Jean Luc had promised her that they all knew of her existence. Speaking of Jean Luc, she could throttle him right about now. For some reason, he had abandoned her to assist Pierre in the vineyard, leaving Antoinette to introduce herself to the new arrivals.
"I'm so sorry; Jean Luc has gone to attend to the vines for a moment and I seem to have been left to introduce myself. I am Antoinette," the woman said smiling. "I guess that you are all surprised that your Captain has married someone you don't even know, and after such a short engagement." As she turned back to her flowers Antoinette continued to talk. "It's such a pity you were all unable to attend our wedding. I know Jean Luc was extremely sad about it."
Deanna and Will were glad Antoinette had turned her back to them. The realisation of her statement was beginning to sink in and their faces had gone from confusion to amazement, "Married!" Will and Deanna both gasped telepathically.
It was obvious from his face that Geordi hadn't been invited to the blessed event either, and his face was moving between concern and hurt in the wake of her piece of news.
Antoinette could feel the tension in the small kitchen and it was beginning to suffocate her. "Do you know if Dr Crusher will be joining us? Jean Luc hasn't received a reply to his invitation," asked Antoinette.
Breaking herself from her shock, something neither Geordi appeared to care to do, nor Will had been able to manage; Deanna answered the captain's new bride as happily as she could. "I spoke with Beverly last week and she had mentioned taking a short trip, before throwing herself into her new job, I am sure she will make every attempt to join us when she receives the message. She may very well be on her way right this minute," said Deanna.
"Beverly never mentioned that she would be going on vacation," said Jean Luc as he suddenly appeared at the door to the kitchen.
His face was difficult for his former officers to read, their silence and expressions were enough to stop him from proceeding any further with his line of enquiry. He got the feeling very quickly that as far as they were concerned; he had lost any right to enquire after his best friend.
Antoinette interrupted Jean Luc before he could speak. "I've just been introducing myself to your friends Jean Luc. Wherever did you get to?" she asked. As Jean Luc began to apologise for leaving his new wife to introduce herself, Antoinette stopped him. "Why don't we move this somewhere more comfortable, or at this rate were never going to eat."
When lunch was over, Geordi offered to assist Antoinette in the kitchen with the dishes. Once they were safely out of earshot, Deanna and Will turned to question their friend over his new bride.
Before either Will or Deanna could even begin to speak Jean Luc stopped them. "I can tell you are both shocked," said Jean Luc "I would just like you to know that I am very happy."
Deanna never expected her former Captain to begin this conversation so suddenly or so openly. "Captain, you know that your happiness means a lot to us," she said touching his hand gently. "Will and I are just worried that you have married very suddenly."
"Captain, can you be sure that you've made the right choice. I mean where did you both meet? Are you sure you haven't moved to fast?" said Riker.
"I can promise you, that she is not a Romulan or Reman spy. We met at Admiral Nakamuras retirement dinner. She is a smart and beautiful exo biologist and I am in love with her."
Deanna could sense the captain's honesty. He truly believed he was in love with Antoinette. "Sir, Neither Will or I doubt you have feelings for Antoinette. I'm also a little upset that you chose not to invite any of your old crew to your wedding."
"I do know the real reason for your concern. And I am touched by it. But that chapter of my life isn't going anywhere and I think I deserve to be happy now. I'm sorry I didn't inform you, but I've been trying to contact Beverly." Jean Luc lowered his eyes, though the sadness was apparent in his voice. "I thought she should be the first to know."
"We understand Captain, but it would have been nice to have been told. Were more than friends, we're family. It seems as though we have all been neglecting our correspondence," said Will sadly.
Will felt a sudden pain in his right shin, As Deanna slammed her foot into his leg.
Jean Luc raised his eyes and replied sheepishly "Yes Will, yes indeed."
When the friends parted way a few days later, they were all in joyous spirits. They had finally settled together and the friends had to admit that Antoinette was a wonderful person. "Enjoy Paris you two and remember Risa is never far away." said Will
Deanna elbowed Will in the ribs, "You can forget Risa Mr Riker. Your Risa days are over." laughed Deanna.
Each person embraced as they said their goodbyes. Geordi stood back to speak to the captain before he left. "Captain please let Beverly know. She doesn't need to hear about this through Starfleet scuttlebutt and you can be sure they will all be clamouring to find out any information they can from her, when she returns from her vacation. Please try to find her."
Jean Luc was stunned at Geordi's request. "I promise to try and find her Geordi. Before you all leave, I would like to ask you all to do me a favour. If Beverly should contact any of you, can you tell her to get in touch with me immediately? asked Jean Luc.
"We will Captain," said Deanna smiling at the newlyweds as they dematerialised back to their Starfleet lives.
Jean Luc tried once again to contact Beverly that day. "I'm sorry Sir, but Dr Crusher left specific instructions that she was not to be disturbed. She is due back at Medical in one week. I am sure she will reply to your messages as soon as she returns." The young Ensign closed the communications channel and took a deep sigh. 'Whatever was going on?' he thought. His boss sure had become Miss Popular, since her departure.
Beverly sat under a parasol in a Paris café sipping on an iced tea and watching the waters of the Seine go by. She listened to the sounds of people laughing and bartering as they bought gifts and groceries from the small stalls that lined the street. The sun shone brightly as it warmed the sidewalk. It had been two weeks of contented bliss and she was beginning to dread her impending return to Starfleet Medical. Beverly scanned the crowd as she had done every day since her discovery of this marvellous little café. It was situated right on the left bank of the Seine staring up at the Eiffel Tower; her café was the perfect spot for watching passers by going about their daily lives.
Beverly spotted Jean Luc before he turned round; he was bartering with a small trader over, at a jewellery stall. She smiled to herself wondering if it was a surprise for her next birthday.
"Merci," said Jean Luc having finalised his purchase. Antoinette had admired the piece earlier and he had decided to take the opportunity, whilst she was purchasing a dress, to return for the trinket. Lifting his head his eyes caught the flash of red hair moving in the sun. Beverly was there in front of him waving and smiling. His breath caught as he stared at the vision before him. Her hair was vibrant like the sun and her eyes sparked their sapphire beauty. She was wearing a short black dress that fell over her figure, belying her years. "Beverly!" he said moving towards her.
"Jean Luc! How are you?" Beverly declared. The redhead moved to hug her best friend, she paused slightly as she realised Jean Luc was holding back. There was something there in his eyes. Something had changed. "What are you doing here?" she asked grasping his hands in a change of greeting.
"I'm wonderful Beverly; I'm just on earth for a little shore leave so I decided to take a short trip to Paris whilst the grapes were being harvested." Jean Luc knew Beverly was curious why he wasn't greeting her properly. He didn't think it was a good idea in case Antoinette saw and got the wrong impression. 'Or even the right one,' he chided himself.
"I decided to take a couple of weeks myself, and Paris just called to me. I was even naughty and left no forwarding address." Beverly laughed.
"I know Beverly. I tried to contact you," said Jean Luc, "But you have a very stubborn assistant Doctor."
As Jean Luc finished talking, he realised that Beverly hadn't released his hands. His eyes came up to meet hers, and for an instant he thought he saw something glimmering in her sapphire eyes. Suddenly Jean Luc could smell Beverly's perfume. Tendrils of her presence began to wrap around him drawing him in. One thought jumped to the front of his mind "My God! What have I done?" he thought.
The sound of Antoinette clearing her throat tore Jean Luc's hands from Beverly's. Beverly turned to see who had interrupted their moment. Her eyes failed to focus for a moment as she took in the woman in front of her. The resemblance was obvious even to Beverly. Jean Luc was speechless and for the second time in as many days he allowed his wife to introduce herself. "Dr Crusher? Jean Luc has told me so much about you."
Beverly pulled her gaze away from Jean Luc and turned her attention to her former captain's companion. Jean Luc could see both women taking in each other. His voice was choked, but he had to say something. "Beverly, please allow me to introduce you to my wife, Antoinette." Finally saying the words to Beverly broke Jean Luc's heart. He knew he would finally have to accept that Beverly would never be a part of his love life and he was destined to spend the rest of his life loving another.
Never meeting Jean Luc's eyes, Beverly focused her attention on the woman to Jean Luc's side. She had grown used to repressing her feelings over the years yet no matter how able she was at hiding her hurt, somehow her Howard temper always found the ability to rise to the surface. Beverly took Antoinette's outstretched hand. "Madam Picard it is an honour to meet you. I'm sorry I 'missed' your wedding. I've been on shore leave before beginning my new post," she snapped.
Beverly's words stung Jean Luc. He should have contacted her sooner. God he should have called in every favour in Starfleet and if that didn't work he should have even called on Q to let her know. He did not want her to find out this way. In the middle of a busy street where neither could ask or answer the deep burning questions that lay inside of them. Jean Luc knew he had hurt Beverly deeply by letting her find out this way.
"We have just shared a wonderful weekend with the rest of the crew of the Enterprise Doctor. It's such a pity you couldn't attend," said Antoinette.
"I've been busy enjoying the sites of Paris. I'm afraid I never got my 'invitation'." Beverly could feel the flush of temper cover her cheeks, and she knew it wouldn't be long before her true emotions flooded to the surface. "Your husband once promised me, to show me around for a weekend, but we never managed to find the right time."
Beverly turned to Jean Luc and he knew she had a deeper meaning than a weekend in Paris. "My apologies Jean Luc, Antoinette; but I must go. I am due back at Star Fleet tomorrow and I have a few things to take care of before I leave. I wish you all the best for the future." Beverly embraced Jean Luc and his new wife before bidding them farewell and walking away. Beverly made it to her hotel room before sobs consumed her.
Jean Luc made the excuse of checking on the harvest, and left the house as soon as he and Antoinette returned from Paris. It had grown late, and the sun had given way to the moon, and yet still Jean Luc walked. He had walked this wooded path many times as a child and more often than not after a fight with his either his father or brother. Along the path Jean Luc began to pick up sticks like he had done as a child. Following the road to the stream he sat on the bank and watched the water flow past. The past few hours had been suffocating. He had obviously been drawn to Antoinette, due to her similarities to Beverly, but now every time he looked at Antoinette, only served to remind him of the hurt he had caused Beverly, and what he was never going to have. Seeing Beverly so suddenly like that had shocked him. He had thought that it would be at a time and place of his choosing and yet again the fates had given him two fingers and screwed with his heart. "Why didn't we make a go of it Beverly?" Jean Luc asked out loud.
"Why didn't you Jean Luc?" Jean Luc turned to find Antoinette standing behind him.
"How long have you been there?" He said quietly.
"Long enough to know there is obviously more than friendship between you and the doctor," replied Antoinette.
"I never meant to hurt you Antoinette. Beverly and I…" Jean Luc faltered.
"Its complicated." answered Antoinette for him.
"No not complicated, just long, very, very long," said Jean Luc
"Well you had better explain it to me Jean Luc because from where I am standing I appear to be some cheap replacement." Antoinette's temper began to surface. "I know she holds more of your heart than I do and I don't think I can remain married under these circumstances. You have some very good explaining to do." With her last words Antoinette turned from Jean Luc and began to walk back to the house.
Jean Luc and Antoinette sat at opposite sides of the table. Each had a cup of cold tea in their hands. It had taken Jean Luc six hours to fully explain the nature of his relationship with Beverly. Six hours to explain thirty plus years and he still felt he hadn't done it justice.
Antoinette had remained silent for the most part. The constant hurt in her eyes destroyed Jean Luc. "I need some sleep Jean Luc," said Antoinette standing. "I think you should try to get some too. I'm going to sleep in the other room tonight. I need some time to myself, some time to think." Antoinette left the room and Jean Luc dropped his head into his hands defeated.
Jean Luc lay on the couch in the library, a copy of Shakespeare's sonnets open on his chest. Sounds of movement in the kitchen woke him from his fitful sleep. Rising quickly the muscles in his back objected to a night spent sleeping on the couch. Jean Luc made his way to the kitchen; he had to speak to Antoinette, he had to let her know that he did love her and that he wasn't using her.
Jean Luc burst into the kitchen to find his sister-in-law. "Jean Luc what on earth are you still doing here?" asked Marie as he burst through the door. "You gave me a fright I thought you and Antoinette had returned to the Enterprise this morning. I'm sorry to intrude."
"Marie it's good to see you. Let me go fetch Antoinette I should introduce you to her." said Jean Luc moving towards the door to fetch Antoinette.
Jean Luc left the kitchen taking the stairs two at a time to search for his wife. This time he was going to introduce Antoinette, but Jean Luc could not find Antoinette in any of the small bedrooms, his wife had said she would use for last night. Jean Luc reached his last hope as he stopped outside his childhood bedroom. The room he and Antoinette had shared. He slowly opened the old oak door to reveal the dark wood furniture crafted generations before he was born. The bed had not been slept in, and a quick look revealed the closet was empty of Antoinette's clothes. Jean Luc dropped to the bed air failing to reach his lungs as he gasped for air in shock. "No, please God NO!" he thought. She couldn't have left him. Slowly his eyes caught a small note gracing the 16th century writing desk that had belonged to Jean Luc's mother.
My Darling Jean Luc,
After last night I can no longer stay married to you. I know you never meant to hurt me and I hope that my actions do not hurt you, but I cannot live in the shadow of another woman. I am not her Jean Luc and I know that you will never be truly happy with me if there was ever the chance that she may one day return your love.
I am reminded of the story of a mother who had to fight for her child, when another woman claimed the child as her own. The true mother would rather give up the child, than have the child harmed. I am giving you up Jean Luc in the hope that you will be truly happy with Beverly. Please do not squander this opportunity and tell her how you really feel before it is too late.
To my forever love.
Antoinette x
Jean Luc hadn't realised he was crying until he lifted his head and felt the salty drops running down his face. He had hurt this woman so much, but she loved him enough to let him go. She loved him enough to let Beverly love him forever. Jean Luc gathered his strength and with new purpose set out to find Beverly and tell her how he felt.
It was Beverly's last day in Paris, and yesterday had drained every reserve of energy she had. She had cried into the night and for several hours had contemplated handing in her resignation. She had many things she could do with her life outside Starfleet. She could visit Wesley, move to Caldos and open a practice or even just stay on earth light years from Jean Luc and his new wife. It had taken her a long time to realise last night that she had no grounds to be upset. She had been the one who had turned Jean Luc away when he had wanted them to move forward. Why shouldn't he try to find love and happiness with someone who was not scared to love him? Someone who wasn't scared what others would think! Who wasn't scared of being hurt? Beverly began to sob again and then chided herself for her stupidity. "Grow up Beverly! It's your own damn fault," she said aloud.
Beverly rose from the sofa and walked to the small bathroom in her hotel suite. Setting the shower on, she stepped inside and allowed the warm water to wash the salty residue from her face. It wasn't long though before Jean Luc began to invade her thoughts in the small cubicle, swallowing the oxygen. Beverly threw open the door and stumbled across the tiled floor gasping for air, sobs racking her body. She moved to the dresser, her naked body still dripping with beads of water and her wet hair hung down, framing her face.
For the first time in a while she truly looked at herself. She could see the grey hairs beginning to find their way through the red, her eyes were swollen and puffy and not about to soothe anytime soon. No wonder Jean Luc had moved on, she was a wreck. "Well it's time for you to move on too Beverly," she said to herself. "He has!"
Three hours later Beverly was packing the last of her things into her suitcase when her eyes caught the corner of a box peeking out from under the chaise lounge. Beverly leaned over and lifted the small box from the floor. She gently lifted the lid and peeled away the tissue paper to reveal the green negligee she had bought on her first day in Paris. Beverly held the negligee against her and moved across the room to the full-length mirror. She gazed at the contrast of the green against the auburn curls of her hair, until her focus blurred and she felt the tears begin to sting the back of her eyes again. She physically shook her head; trying to shake away the tears and despair that gripped her heart. She had bought this for him. She had bought this to wear for him. That sudden realisation brought Beverly to her knees. Knowing she needed to do something, Beverly stood and threw the rest of her garments into her travel case. She needed to keep herself occupied. She would return early to Starfleet medical and get herself back to work. That had always worked before.
Beverly replied to the sound of her door chime automatically, expecting to find the maid wishing access. She never expected Jean Luc to walk through her door. Beverly grasped hold of the door to stop from falling to her knees again. "Beverly you are a very hard person to track down," he smiled gently at her and she could see there was a difference in him, one that she could not place.
"That was my original plan. I didn't want to be found, maybe that's why Jean Luc," she replied. Beverly was shocked. Why was he here? To rub my nose in it while he can? Words failed Beverly, however this turn of events suited Jean Luc and he took his chance.
"I've come to ask you one question Beverly. It's a question I need a truthful reply to right now. Otherwise my wife has left me for no reason," Jean Luc stared into Beverly's sapphire orbs praying for the truth to penetrate her soul.
Beverly was suddenly robbed of all emotion. She couldn't fathom any feelings for Jean Luc's news. "She left you! What happened?"
"In Paris the other day, Antoinette realised I was in love with another woman and left me. Before she left though she left me a note telling me to find the woman I loved and to tell her my feelings," he said, "I'm glad I found her."
Beverly almost choked on his words "Jean Luc what are you saying?"
Jean Luc began to grin at this beautiful creature's disbelief. "I'm saying that I love you Beverly! I always have and I always will."
"How can you still love me Jean Luc? I have been so scared to love you and now I've cost you your marriage. You don't deserve that. I don't deserve you," Beverly began to sob uncontrollably, Jean Luc moved to her and wrapped his arms around her, holding her while her body shook with disbelief that he would still love her, still want her after everything they had been through.
"Beverly please don't analyse this. Just let me love you and I promise you everything will be better in the morning. Don't let both our past mistakes ruin the happiness we could both share. We love one another, who cares what the world thinks?" Beverly realised Jean Luc was pleading with her. He was laying his heart on the line. This time she couldn't turn away. This was their last chance! Beverly couldn't allow his pleas to go unanswered.
"I love you Jean Luc," she whispered.
The declaration was so quiet Jean Luc wasn't quite sure he had heard it. "Tell me again Beverly," he pleaded the smallest of smiles beginning to cross his lips.
This time Beverly opened her heart and with no hesitation, or regret she spoke the words that had they had both waited over thirty years to hear. "I love you Jean Luc. I have always loved you. You will never know how much I love you. How much my body has ached for you all these years? I have felt incomplete without you. Please stay…"
Jean Luc lifted his hand to Beverly's face. His strong hands cupping her porcelain jaw with the lightest of touches. Slowly they brought their lips together. Jean Luc moved his hand down and he and Beverly intertwined their fingers. Jean Luc begged entrance to Beverly's mouth with his tongue. Beverly willingly began to massage Jean Luc's tongue with her own and very soon both of them grew breathless from their efforts. The couple gave in and rested their heads together while they caught their breath. Beverly smiled as she looked into Jean Luc's eyes. For the first time nothing was hidden, there were no guards, just love echoed in their eyes
The End