Is there anybody out there who
Is lost and hurt and lonely too
They're bleeding all the colors into one
And a few come undone
As if you've been run through
Some catapultit fired you
You wonder if your chance will ever come
Or if you're stuck in square one...
Square One-Coldplay

It was the day of the funeral and word had spread fast around the small town about Dan Scott's death. Haley stayed true to her word and had helped out with the funeral preparations as well as the others. The initial shock of his death seemed to ware off of everyone except one. Lucas was still acting the same way he was when he found out about Dan's death, empty. He held no emotion.

The funeral went by fast, it was a short service, and not too many people had showed up. Most of his former employees had showed up, but only out of respect. Keith, who had been basically out of contact, didn't even bother to show up. No one was even sure that he knew about his brother's death, or that he would even care. They all rode to the cemetery, watched him get buried, and paid their last respects. That had happened a few hours ago and yet they were still there. Deb and Nathan had gone home after the first hour, as well as the rest, but Lucas still stayed and Peyton was right there with him.

"Still seems unreal, huh?" She finally broke the silence as they stood in front of his headstone.

"Yeah." He said softly, not taking his gaze off the headstone.

Peyton was getting worried. They had been standing in this spot for hours and they hadn't moved. He told her to go back home like the others, but she couldn't leave him alone like that, she wouldn't leave him.

"Beloved husband and father," He read the inscription on the headstone, "Yeah right." He let out a sarcastic laugh.

"Are you okay?" Normally she didn't like asking this question, but she felt like she had to. He was starting to scare her. He had been like this ever since Friday, silent and reserved. She just couldn't get him to open up, no one could.

"You know I kept on telling myself when this day would finally come that I wouldn't care," He ignored her question, "That I wouldn't feel one ounce of sympathy for the man and now look at me."

She took a step closer to him; she had been standing behind him the whole time just to give him his space, but now she didn't think he needed any.

"Lucas it's okay to feel hurt." She placed a hand on his shoulder, which caused him to look back at her.

"But that's just it… I don't feel anything. I don't know what to feel, Peyton. I don't know whether to cry, laugh, or just scream. I don't know what I should do." He said his voice full of emotion. He was hurt and he was lost.

"Well do you want to talk about it?" She tried to reach out to him. He looked back at her and nodded.

"Okay." She said softly as they walked over to the small stone bench that was placed in between some of the other headstones.

"Do you miss him?" She asked once they sat down.

"No I don't." She closed her eyes briefly as she heard the regret in his voice. He must've felt guilty, so guilty, and he had no reason to feel that way.

"There's nothing wrong with that—"

"Yes there is. I was lying when I told you I didn't feel anything—I mean for a while I didn't… but it wasn't until today when I realized that I do feel something." He admitted.

"What do you feel?" She asked softly, trying her best not to pry the information out of him. She didn't want to make him talk; she needed him to want to talk.

He looked over at her, "I feel guilty."

"I know how that feels." She whispered.

"That's how you felt when your mother died?" He questioned and she nodded. He didn't mean to bring up her mother, but it was probably the only way they could share some common ground.

"She ran one red light and look what happened. Like I told you before, I run the all the time and nothing happens to me. It's not fair… it's not fair at all." She didn't know why, but at that moment she felt the need to cry, but she didn't. Maybe it was remembering what happened or just being at the cemetery.

"I'm sorry." She rested her head on his shoulder as he wrapped his arm around her.

"Don't worry about it." She whispered as she took comfort in his arms.

"I just can't help thinking that what Nathan said was right. I pushed him, Peyton. I moved into his house and I tried to bring him down. I made him think that I wanted him to be apart of my life and once he thought we were close I tried to bring him down. I was practically obsessed with it. Even when Nathan told me to back off, I gave him my word, and I still went after Dan. I brung Dan to this." The guilt was evident in his voice as he spoke.

"None of this is your fault, okay? Dan wasn't exactly a saint. He had hurt you, your mom, and others countless times so you had a reason to be upset with him. I admit it was wrong of you to keep on trying to bring him down like that, but at the time you did what you thought was right. You were just trying to protect the people you love Lucas. There's nothing wrong with that. Dan brought this on himself." She tried to put everything as nicely as she could. She really wanted to tell him that Dan Scott was a bastard who played with people's emotions and didn't deserve anyone's sympathy, but she didn't out of respect for the dead.

"You're right… it's just I wish things were different."

"Me too." She whispered thinking about something else.

"What?" He looked down at her in confusion.

She pulled out of his hold to look at him, "Nothing… it was nothing. So do you feel a little better now that you've talked about it?"

"A little," He paused and actually thought about her question, "Actually a lot. Thanks Peyton." He smiled at her.

"No problem, but if you ever want to talk you know that I'm here for you okay?"

He nodded, "You're a great friend Peyton." He stood up from the bench and held out his hand to her so she could get up. She accepted it and let go as soon as they started walking.

"You too, Luke, you too." She said more to herself than to him. Just a friend was what she had to be.

"Lucas! I was worried sick about you!" He closed the door behind him and walked into the kitchen where his mother was currently yelling at him.

"I'm sorry… Peyton and I just stayed at the cemetery a little longer." That was the truth. After they had finished their talk he went with her to go see her mother. She had been so strong today; she had been his rock for the past few days. He turned to look at the clock and saw that it was almost nine; maybe he was home a little late.

"Okay… well there's some leftovers from dinner in the microwave if you're hungry." Karen didn't really know what to say. She was afraid for her son. It was like Dan's death didn't even affect him.

"Okay."

"How are you holding up?" She asked hoping that Lucas wouldn't lie to her about how he was feeling.

"Better than before."

"You know when Deb called me and told me that Dan had passed I felt just like you did."

"You did?" Karen nodded.

"I did and that was because ever since I came back from New Zealand I kept on telling myself as soon as Dan got out of the hospital I would give him a piece of mind. I wanted to make him pay and then it just happened… he died." She admitted. After she found out what Dan had done to Andy and not to mention Keith, she truly despised him. It wasn't like she didn't before, because she did, but after that she had realized what a monster he really was. Of course now she felt guilty.

"I just don't get how practically everyone is going around grieving and saying what a good man he was because he wasn't."

Karen placed a hand on his shoulder, "Well that's what we have to do sometimes… you have to respect the dead."

He nodded, "You're right."

"Of course I am." She laughed a little.

Lucas' face broke into a small smile before he went into a daze. He was thinking about her again. Peyton just understood him so well; he didn't know how he would've come to gripes with Dan's death without her.

Karen noticed the look on her son's face and immediately knew what he was thinking about.

"You know you've been spending a lot of time with Peyton lately." She hinted and watched as he immediately snapped out of his daze.

"We spent the whole summer together and as a result of that we're better friends now." He tried to act like it was nothing.

"Uh huh," She turned to look at her son, "So there's absolutely nothing going on with you two?"

"We're just friends. You don't ask questions like this about Haley." He tried to throw her off, but he just couldn't outsmart her.

"Yeah you're right," She allowed, "But you don't look at Haley the way you look at Peyton."

"We're just friends." He defended himself as they both leaned on the counter.

"She's been going through a lot lately." Karen immediately thought about when Haley had told her about Peyton and the drugs. Peyton had been so lost last year.

"Yeah," He sighed, "I just wish I could help her more… I'm starting to think being there just isn't enough."

"You really care about her don't you?" She figured the only way to get any answer from him was to get straight to the point. She had seen the sadness in his eyes when she brung up Peyton's problems.

He stalled for a while, not sure of what to say. He didn't want to lie to his mother, but it wasn't like he wanted to tell her either.

"Yeah." He finally admitted.

"Did you tell her yet?" He shook his head.

"Why not?"

"I've tried. I've tried a lot, but something always got in the way, or it just wasn't the right time."

"Sounds like you're a little scared to me." She said knowingly and he nodded.

"I am."

Karen patted her son's shoulder and began to walk out of the kitchen, "Well you shouldn't be. I don't want to interfere in your love life, Lucas, but you should tell her. She needs all the love and support she can get." Those were her last words before she disappeared into her room. With everything that was happening telling Peyton how he felt was the last thing on his mind or maybe he just let himself believe that. The truth was that he was scared, but he couldn't go on like this anymore. He would tell her when the time was right.

Peyton slowly trudged up the stairs, she couldn't wait to get to her room, but she was so tired she could barely get up the stairs. Standing up with Lucas practically all day and not moving was starting to take a toll on her. She finally reached the top of the steps and looked towards Haley's room, there was nobody in there. She must've been in her room or something. Peyton was emotionally and physically drained. All she wanted to do was go to sleep. She finally reached her room and saw Haley looking through her CDs.

"Hey Hales." She said glumly as she wasted no time and threw herself on her bed.

Haley turned away from the CDs and looked at Peyton, who was currently lying face down on her bed.

"P Boogie! You're finally home. I was just looking for the CD that you borrowed from me a few days ago." Haley said cheerfully, obviously trying to cheer her friend up.

"Oh," Peyton finally sat up on her bed, "I'm sorry Lucas wanted to stay longer at the… what did you just call me?"

"P Boogie?"

"What?" Peyton laughed wondering why Haley called her that.

"Oh c'mon," Haley sat next to Peyton on the bed, "I needed a nickname for you. Brooke calls you P Sawyer, Lucas calls you Peyt, and you told me your dad used to call you chicken so I just figured I'd make one up."

"And that was all you could think of?" She laughed some more. She was suddenly feeling much better.

"Well yeah… c'mon don't laugh."

"I can't help it. It's a funny nickname." She continued to laugh and soon Haley was laughing along with her.

"So how's Lucas doing?" Haley asked once their laughter was over.

"He's better… atleast I hope he is. He told me he was, but you know how Lucas is."

She nodded, "Yeah. I just wish I could talk to him."

"You can talk to him, Hales. He needs his best friend at a time like this."

"I know, it's just I don't know what to say or what to do. If I go and talk to him I'm afraid that I'll say the wrong thing or something and then he'll just shut me out." She voiced her fears to Peyton. She didn't like not knowing what to do or say to her best friend, but that's just how she was. She was scared.

"Then just be there for him. He needs you." She reasoned with Haley and watched as she nodded.

"Good." Peyton moved so that she was now at the foot of the bed where Haley was.

"So you don't like it?" Haley turned to Peyton; she felt the need to change the subject.

"Like what?"

"The nickname."

"Well if it was all you could think of…" She trailed off and started to laugh until Haley hit her with a pillow.

"Shut up!" Haley laughed.

"Dude that hurt." She rubbed her arm as Haley continued to laugh at her.

Haley was about to speak when the doorbell started to ring.

"Who's that?" Peyton asked wondering why whoever was at the door was actually ringing the doorbell.

"Oh yeah, I ordered Chinese is that all right?" She got up from off the bed and headed towards the door.

"It's fine."

"Good… I'll bring it up here." And with that she went out the door.

Peyton smiled to herself, Haley was definitely getting the hang of living in the Sawyer household.

Lucas stood at his locker getting some books for his last three classes of the day. Two weeks had passed since the funeral and he had been feeling much better than he did before. Speaking to his mom, Peyton, and Haley about things really helped him.

"Hey!" He practically jumped as he felt someone grip his shoulders. He turned his head to see a strangely happy Peyton.

"You scared me." He sighed as she let go of him.

"I got you good didn't I?" She began to laugh a little. Just seeing a smile on her face made him happy as he felt a smile play upon his lips.

"Yeah," He admitted, "So what's with the good mood all of sudden?"

"Oh I don't know… hey guess what." He laughed at her being so overexcited. He hadn't seen her this happy in a long time.

"What?" He closed his locker.

"My dad's coming back in to town tomorrow." She said her voice was full of happiness. She missed her father so much. She hadn't seen or spoke to him in such a long time.

"Really? That's great." They started walking down the hall.

"Isn't it?" She beamed proudly.

"When was the last time you saw him?"

She paused to actually think about his question. She hadn't seen him in such a long time that she really didn't remember.

"Probably when you tried to beat him with a rake." She smirked remembering that moment.

"Ha ha," He said sarcastically, "I just thought he was a robber or something." He tried to defend himself.

"Hey guys," Haley came out from a classroom and began walking with them.

"Hey Hales." They both said.

"What's up P Boogie?" She asked noticing the happy look Peyton had on her face.

"What?" Lucas made a face, which made them both laugh.

"It's my nickname for her." Haley laughed as Lucas still held that look.

"Don't ask." Peyton laughed and he nodded.

"I'm almost afraid to."

"But seriously Luke, you should come by tomorrow after school or whatever. That's when he'll be at the house."

"Okay." Lucas nodded.

"Who?" Haley asked feeling left out. She didn't know Peyton was expecting company.

Peyton turned to Haley, "My dad's gonna be back in town tomorrow, he's going to be staying for about a week."

Haley nodded. That must've been why Peyton was in a good mood. She had never really met Peyton's father, but she knew how much Peyton cared about him. She just hoped that Larry Sawyer wouldn't be angry at her living with them now.

"That's great, but does he know that I'm—"

"Yeah, I told him a while ago in an email."

Haley nodded and started to feel better about the whole situation.

"This is my class so I guess I'll see you guys tomorrow… or later." Lucas stopped in front of the classroom and they both nodded.

"Great. I'm sure my dad will be glad to know that Rake boy's coming over." She called out and watched as Lucas went inside the classroom, shaking his head as he walked.

"Rake boy?" She asked.

"It's a long story."

"Hey," Lucas walked into Peyton's room, but not before knocking, "Haley told me you were up here so I just figured I'd see what you were up to." Lucas looked around and realized that Peyton was in there.

"Hey Luke!" He heard her shout, but yet he still didn't see her.

"Peyton?" He asked as he tried to get closer to where the sound of her voice was coming from.

"I'm in here!" He walked over to her closet where he found her reaching for something.

"What are you doing?" He leaned in the doorway.

"Trying to get this old record." She continued to reach for it, but no matter how hard she tried she couldn't get to it.

"Let me help." Lucas walked over to where she was standing and grabbed the record with ease.

"Thanks." Lucas gave her the record, but not before quickly glancing at it.

"Didn't I give you this?"

She nodded as she finally walked out of her closet, "Yeah… awesome gift by the way."

"No problem." He followed her out of the closet and sat on her bed as she went to go play the record.

"See I'm on that 80s metal kick again, so I decided to listen to this." The record started to play as she sat next to him on her bed.

"I was almost afraid to come in here."

"Why?"

"I was afraid you would be listening to Celine Dion or something." He joked referring to when she was unexpectedly listening to Sheryl Crow.

"I just needed something to sketch to." She lied.

"I never thought I'd see the day when Peyton Sawyer would be listening to Sheryl Crow."

"Shut up," She laughed a little and rolled her eyes at him, "Sheryl Crow is awesome man."

"Right… so I don't mean to throw off your good mood, but when your father comes tomorrow are you going to ask him about the whole Elizabeth situation?"

The smile on her face immediately disappeared at the mention of Elizabeth.

"I don't know," She answered honestly, "I'm just so happy that I get to see my dad again, you know? As much as I want to know if she's telling the truth or not, I would rather just run from it."

"Peyton—"

"I know it's wrong, but what if it's true Luke? What if Elizabeth really is my mother? Finding out that my dad lied to me isn't exactly how I want to remember his visit."

"I know, but what if it isn't true? What if Elizabeth was just lying? You would want to know that wouldn't you?" He was trying to get through to her. He understood her fears of not bringing it up with her dad again, but asking him about it would be the only way to put her mind at ease with the whole thing.

"Yeah. Maybe I'll bring it up the day before he leaves so we could talk. I just—I just can't help but be scared about this, Luke. It's scary when there's a possibility that everything you knew about your life, everything that made you who you are, and everything you possibly lived by was practically a lie." She looked up at him, but there were no tears in her eyes like he expected there to be. She was hurt of course, but she wouldn't cry, she was refused to.

"I'm sorry."

"It's not your fault," She shook her head, "If anything I should be apologizing to you for burdening you with my problems."

"You're not a burden, Peyton and neither are your problems. I just want to help you, you know lighten the load a little."

She looked up at him again, offering a small smile, which he returned.

"I don't know what I would've done without you over the summer or even now, Luke."

This probably would've been the perfect time to tell her how he really felt about her, just to let her know that he would always be here for her, but instead he didn't say anything. He wondered if his chance to tell her would ever come.

This would've been the perfect time to tell him how she really felt about him, too. To tell him that she needed him and wanted there to be more than just friendship between them, but once again she opted for gratitude instead. Whenever they would get closer she would always do or say something to bring them a step back again. She didn't mean to, nor did she want to, but it would always just… happen.

"The feeling's mutual." He whispered. Suddenly she got off of the bed and gave him a soft pat on the back.

"I'm going to go downstairs and ask Haley if she wants to come hang with us, okay?" She headed towards the door, but not before turning to see if that was okay with him.

"Cool." And with that she went out the door.

There's not much to really say about this chapter… the only thing I really have to say is that the next chapter is an important one. You know, with Larry Sawyer coming back into town and Karen knowing how Lucas feels about Peyton, something could happen. It's been seven chapters and neither of them have told each other how they felt... maybe things are about to change. Thanks for the reviews and I'm so sorry it's been two weeks since I last updated, but I already have the next chapter ready so review and maybe I'll post it tomorrow or something. Speed of Sound is next.