Disclaimer: I don't own anything from Harry Potter
Just a joke….
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July 25th
Draft one
Dearest Hermione Granger
Draft two
Dear Granger
Draft three
Granger,
I am informed that you were recently elected has head girl. Congratulations.
But that is not the reason why I wrote this letter.
I'm elected head boy, so that concludes that we will be sharing a dormitory together.
As much as I'm displeased with this, I have no other choice then cooperate with you this coming year, since we are expected to go to meetings together, patrol together and live together.
But don't anticipate me becoming you're uber best friend.
Because I won't. I will simply be civil to you, and your accompanies.
Sincerely
Draco Lucius Venango Theodore Phillip Beelzebub Malfoy
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July 26th
Dear Draco Lucius Venango Theodore Phillip Beelzebub Malfoy,
Congrats on you achieving head-boy status.
I must say, I totally agree with the civil rule. That will make is much more uncomplicated during the year and far less nerve-racking.
Even though I hate uttering these simply words; that is a fine arrangement, Malfoy.
Hermione Jane Lea Granger
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July 27th
Granger,
Hermione Jane Lea Granger? What type of name is THAT?
P.S
Thank you for agreeing, I must say it was a brilliant mind scheme of mine.
P.P.S
Muhahaha
Greetings from sir D.M
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July 28th
Malfoy,
My name strange? Take a closer peek at yours!
Draco Lucius Venango Theodore Phillip Beelzebub Malfoy!
THAT is strange.
P.S
Oh, don't flatter yourself.
P.P.S
Muhahahaha? MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA:)
Friendly hello from
H.G
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July 30th
Granger,
You are queer.
P.S
School starts tomorrow, don't forget. ;)
Malfoy
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July 30th
Malfoy,
Thank you, so are you.
P.S
I wouldn't forget
H.G
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September 1st
Ms. Sexy Granger,
Woo, didn't you look lovely at the feast tonight.
I loved that open cloak thing. It looked quite lovely with your fairly revealing shirt.
And to top all the sex appeal off; that shoving-in-food tactic really charmed me.
But enough about you
Well no, not enough about you!
You are making a bloody racket! What are you doing in there! We have only been in this new dormitory for like…what?...5 minutes and you already have some one bagged? Quite impressive. But something less impressive are your orgasms…..are you faking? It sounds like that, to be moderately honest.
So, when you get this letter…..would you mind putting a silencing charm around your bed? Or even better, around yourself? It would do everyone a favor, even the person you are shagging right now. He is (or she!) is probably wondering what he got himself into.
P.S
And might I add, that Dumbledore can doubtlessly hear you? Seeing that his study is right above our dormitory.
Sincerely
Draco Malfoy, a person who can hear you every single night.
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September 1st
I don't know where to start! That letter was so offensive in so many aspects that I don't know how to start scowling you!
First.
Were you looking down my shirt when you came by? Because if you did, I'm going to blast your balls off.
Second.
Shoving-in-food? I was neatly spooning up my soup! How can you be so bloody blind to common courtesy?
Third.
I was singing you dimwitted twat! SINGING! Under the shower! How can you mistake that for a faked orgasm? Or are you just naturally perverted?
And can Dumbledore really hear my singing? Oh no! No, no, no, no! What would he think of me? I'm doomed to be judged by my voice! OH NO!
Hermione Granger
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Good god! You shower?
Malfoy
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September 1st
Dear Ms. Hermione Granger,
As much as I enjoy you're singing in my free time. It's rather disturbing when I'm trying to concentrate on ministry taxing.
So if you would be so kindly inclined to soften a bit down for the rest of the evening, I would genuinely appreciate.
Friendly Greetings
Albus Dumbledore
P.S
You seem to have a sore throat. A lemon drop might fix that.
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