Chapter 5

Hyde strode angrily in the direction of the nearest bar, cursing under his breath. Ever since Jackie had first excused herself from the circle two weeks ago he had felt like she was slipping away from him – hell, this feeling had been going on since shortly after they got back together. Now it was like all his misgivings had morphed into human form – Michael Kelso.

Hyde was on his fourth beer when Eric parked himself at his table.

"Man, if you wanted to get wasted you could have stayed home with us."

"Better company here," grunted Hyde.

Eric looked around the near empty bar and sighed. "That hurts, man. So what, you're gonna bottle up all your feelings and drink yourself into a coma? Don't push me away, Steven. Let the pain out. Release your anger. Owww! Not like that!" Eric rubbed his bruised arm gingerly.

"What the hell are you doing here, Foreman? Did Donna send you scurrying after me? I tell you, you're just the flying monkey to her wicked witch."

"Actually, that's not far off the truth, but you picked the wrong witch."

"Jackie?"

"Yeah. She's really worried that you're mad at her."

"I'm not mad at her," Hyde replied, swigging his beer. "She's not the one pulling the strings here."

"What, you're saying Kelso is the puppetmaster? Hello, has a lifetime of association with the guy not taught you anything about his capabilities or lack thereof?"

"I know Kelso has never given up on Jackie and she's always been too naive where he's concerned. Did you know they've been hanging out together lately? I saw him walking her home from school the other day. I got off early from work and was going to surprise her and pick her up in the Camino when I saw them walking along, laughing together."

"So what? I thought the taboo on Kelso and Jackie alone time was lifted after you strayed into the 'cheatin' side of town'. That whole mess should have taught you that even if Kelso can't be trusted, Jackie can."

"They have this secret language, man," Hyde said, massaging the tension from his neck muscles. "They've known each other for years. They like the same movies, shows, music… she'll come in all excited over some second string TV actor opening up a meat market and he'll be jumping around like the moron he is, sharing her high."

"That doesn't mean she's going to fall in love with him again," Eric argued. "That just makes him good friend material. And that's all Jackie has tried to be to him lately – a friend. Hyde, anyone unfortunate enough to be in the same room as you two when you're having one of your little cuddling sessions cannot doubt she is totally hot for you."

"Hey, I don't cuddle," snapped Hyde. "That's just like… foreplay. And I know she's hot for me. But what if the sex is all that's holding us together? Sooner or later that's going to get old and she'll be looking for something more. Something tells me she's not going to find it in me."

Eric paused, at a loss for words. Motioning for a beer, he sipped the cold liquid, trying to find the right words to cheer his friend up. But there were no right words.

"So, how about that new Pink Floyd album? Not as good as their last, but some decent stuff on there."

"Whatever, man," Hyde replied, shutting down.

Later that night Hyde was lying on his cot. In spite of the beer he had shipped his anxiety had not been blunted and sleep eluded him. So absorbing were his thoughts he did not hear his bedroom door open and was only alerted to her presence when he heard her soft whisper "Steven?"

"Jackie! What are you doing here?"

"You didn't come tonight," she replied, shrugging out of her coat to reveal her pyjamas. She slipped under the covers of his bed, knowing she and Hyde communicated best when they were in contact each other – preferably in a horizontal position. "Seeing as how you're still awake, I guess I'm not the only one who has trouble getting to sleep alone these days." Hyde grunted what could be construed as an acknowledgment, spooning his body against hers. This was good – if only she didn't start a 'discussion'.

"Steven – "

Crap!

"Steven, you know that my giving up smoking is nothing to do with either you or Michael, right?"

"Jackie, I'm tired and I've got a hang over creeping up on me. Can we put off the analysis of your motivations til tomorrow?"

"I just wanted you to know this won't change anything. It's not a big deal."

"Good. That's settled then."

"Steven! I know when you're agreeing with me just to shut me up!"

"Fine, Jackie! What do you want me to say? That I'm OK with you dropping out of the circle? Well, I guess instead of having pot and sex in common, we'll just have the sex."

"What!" Jackie cried, struggling into a sitting position and turning on the bedside light. "Are you saying that's all you think we have going for us?"

"Can you name any other interests we share? Because I've been racking my brain tonight trying to come up with something and I've got zip."

Jackie fought to keep her voice steady against the rising tears. "How about love? Trust? Just enjoying each other's company?"

"Those are just concepts, Jackie, words for feelings that can change overnight. I remember how all your love and trust went out the window that time I told you I had cheated on you. I remember how the love and trust I had for my Dad died when he walked out when I was 9. Emotions can't be counted on – a relationship has got to be based on something more."

Jackie could not hold back the tears and the shuddering breaths that accompanied them. Suddenly Hyde realised how far their fight had crossed into dangerous territory and cursed himself for revealing his thoughts. At least he hadn't mentioned Kelso – if she knew how insecure he still was over that idiot, she would be really pissed.

"Baby, I'm sorry," he said, pulling her into his arms. At first her body stiffened in his embrace but then softened as his lips started to kiss her cheek, her neck, her shoulder. "Don't listen to me – all that beer is making me talk crazy."

"Steven, you need to talk to me if you're having doubts about our relationship – "

"No doubts," he said, working his way back towards her bee stung lips. "I was just pissed off and saying things I didn't mean. You and I are solid, babe. I know that."

Jackie knew that Steven's words did not ring true but as his tongue seduced its way into her mouth and his hands kindled a fire within her, she found herself unwilling to protest.