Disclaimer: I don't own Wolf's Rain, in anyway, shape or form.

Luna: This is my first Wolf's Rain fic! And the characters are slightly OOC. Okay, VERY. But that's because this is a parody. This takes place before they find Cheza. Review!

Chapter 1

Kiba sniffed the air, again. Tsume, Tobeo and Hige close behind. They were still looking for that damn Lunar Flower, and Kiba insisted it was this way. As in the middle of nowhere. Finally, they came to a village.

" Kiba, can we stop here?" asked Hige, " I'm hungry."

" You ate 2 seconds ago," replied Kiba.

" But I smell hotdogs!" whined Hige.

" Do you really believe that you smell hotdogs in that village?" asked Tsume.

Hige rolled his eyes. Tsume was the skeptic of 'Paradise' and the Lunar Flower and…just about everything else.

" Yes, I do." replied Hige, annoyed.

" Alright…" said Kiba, " We'll stop here for a little while. We meet back at the entrance in an hour."

With those words, the foursome spilt up. Tobeo dreaded this. Because wherever he went…

" Hey, cutie!" cried some random man.

Tobeo ignored it and kept going.

" Sweetie, where you heading so fast?" asked another man, blocking his path.

" Leave me alone!" said Tobeo, anger raising in his voice.

" And let a cute thing like you get away? At least let me buy you a drink!" said the first man.

" I'm a boy, dammnit!" screamed Tobeo, finally.

The 2 men stared, dumbfounded.

" Do you really believe you're a male?" piped in Tsume.

" YES! I DO!"

The 2 men ran off in horror, questioning their sexualities.

Tobeo gritted his teeth. It wasn't exactly his fault he looked girly. Or was it…?

" Tsume, I'm sick of looking like a girl!" declared Tobeo, " Can you help me look manlier?"

" Do you really believe you can become a real man?"

Meanwhile…

Hige was off buying hotdogs and shoveling them down 3 at a time. He wondered why he even bothered on this stupid journey. Gulping down the 4th hot dog, he soon realized it was the free food.

" Paradise sounds like some cheap hotel resort," mumbled Hige, to himself, " And the Lunar Flower sounds more like a cheap perfume."

" Wow, you sure can eat a lot of hotdogs!" said the hotdog seller, " What's your name?"
" Hige," said Hige.

" He…gay?"
" Uh, yeah…"

" Well…that's a nice name."

Hige sighed.

" Anyway, I wanted to ask you if you'd like to be in out 3rd annual hotdog eating contest!"

" Is the food free?" asked Hige.

" Yeah."
" I'm there!"

Back to Tobeo and Tsume…

" So, to be manly I should wear lots of leather, right?" asked Tobeo.

" Do you really believe that?" asked Tsume.

Tobeo ignored him and promptly bought a pair of leather pants, thinking the tight leather would clearly show his gender. He ran to the nearest dressing room and slipped into the pants; clearly miscalculating how tight it was.

" Ouch…" said Tobeo, " How do you move in these things?"
" Do really believe that the leather pants are tight?" asked Tsume.

" Duh, it is!"

" Hello there!" said another random man.

" I'm a BOY!" screamed Tobeo, fuming, " A BOYY!"

" I was just saying hello…" said the man, taken aback.

" Do you really believe that man was hitting on you?" asked Tsume.

" Yes! YES, I DO!" cried Tobeo, " Can't you do ANYTHING but question stuff?"
" Do you really believe-"

" SHUTUP!"

Tobeo normally would've ran, but he could barely walk as it was. So he waddled away.

Luna: Next Chapter : Find out where Kiba is! And the insanity counties! I don't have anything against Tobeo, but…when I first saw him I thought he was a girl…Anyway, REVIEW!