'Gorram yúchûn húndàn!' River was screaming.

'River, I don't know what you…' Simon protested.

'Could have broken you!'

'Who did? River, if you don't calm down you're going to have to leave the infirmary.' It sounded as if they were scuffling at the doorway.

'Him!' she called venomously. Then her voice went calm and solemn, always a bad sign. 'See how he likes it.'

'River,' Simon said sternly, just a hint of panic underneath it. 'Give Jayne back his knife.'

'He did it to you.'

'Who, Jayne? Jayne's never cut me. He prefers fists to knives when dealing with friends.'

'Not him, him!' she cried in frustration. 'Instruments of healing used for hurt.'

'You mean Mal,' Simon realized. He finished quietly, 'He didn't mean it.'

'Didn't mean what?' Mal asked sullenly. He hadn't quite forgiven Simon for their screaming match yet.

'To cut me,' Simon answered.

'What? I've punched you twice, doc, and those were both a while back. That's it.'

'It's nothing,' Simon said.

'Not bruises,' River corrected. 'Wounds.' Her voice was over Mal now.

'River, give me the scalpel back now!' Simon instructed.

Scalpel. The scalpels that Simon left on his medical tray beside the bed. That was what he had thrown at the doctor. So he hadn't stormed off angry or scared after all, he had been bleeding.

'Wanted to blind you too.' River's voice was still anguished, but Simon seemed to have got her to the door. 'Could have been an eye.'

Suspicion flaring uncomfortably, Mal asked, 'Where did I hit you?'

'What?' Simon asked. 'Captain, it really doesn't…'

'Where?'

'Just above my cheek. But it really doesn't…'

Mal turned his head away and feigned sleep.

'Is the Captain awake?' Mal woke to Kaylee's voice at the infirmary door.

'I don't know,' Simon said. 'Captain? Mal?'

Mal stayed quiet. He couldn't take Kaylee's warmth or Simon's concern right now.

'Captain,' Simon continued. 'Kaylee and I are going to take the engine apart, is that okay?'

'Simon!' Kaylee protested, giggling.

'Engineering's pretty much the same as surgery anyway, yes?'

'Simon!'

'Now we know he's asleep,' Simon replied, unrepentant.

'I guess that's true,' she conceded. Mal heard her trip over to the side of the room, and then a dull thumping as she climbed onto the bench and kicked her heels against it.

'Kaylee...' Simon said.

'What?' she asked innocently.

'Nothing,' he answered in resignation.

'So... how are you and the Captain?'

'What do you mean?'

'Spendin a lot of time together, aren't ya?'

'He's my patient, Kaylee. If I wasn't spending a lot of time with him I wouldn't be very good at my job.'

'You know what I mean...'

'I really wish I didn't.'

'Come on, Simon...'

'Kaylee.' There was a deep sigh, as if the two of them had been having this conversation for a while. Mal couldn't remember ever hearing it, but as it seemed to involve him in some way, that wasn't unlikely.

'Come on, doc, you break a gal's heart, won't even do her the courtesy of giving her the gossip after?'

Mal would have spoken up. No one, but no one, broke his girl's heart, but Kaylee was giggling, so he suspected she was joking.

'Kaylee, I...'

'Relax, Simon, you know I'm just teasin. Not about the gossip, though, so spill.'

'Kaylee, why did I tell you about my preferences?'

She sighed and parroted back, 'So I wouldn't be hurt that you weren't chasin me.'

Well that was a new bit of information. Not entirely surprising, but interesting to know. How in the hell did he miss Kaylee finding out that one? Mal would have though the whole ship would have heard her sobbing at the end of that crush.

Simon was still talking, 'What was not the reason that I told you?'

She dutifully answered, 'So I could set you up with the captain.'

'Exactly...'

Wait. What now? This was not... Mal gave up trying to get his head around that and just listened.

'But that's not what I'm doing!' Kaylee protested. 'I just want a little gossip. You know, girl-talk.'

'Kaylee!' Simon's indignant squeak wasn't going to help his case much.

Kaylee was giggling again. 'Still an easy mark. So come on. You gotta give me something. When did you first, you know, realise an all.'

'Realise what?'

'Simon!'

'I'm being serious. When did I realise that he was good-looking, or when did I...'

'Love. Sex-wanting. That one.'

Simon laughed then, reluctantly. 'Jiangyin'

'Jiangyin…' Kaylee said. 'That was the planet where you and River got yourselves took, right?'

'We didn't get ourselves taken,' Simon protested mildly. 'It was just unfortunate.'

'Sure,' she replied agreeably. 'So, why then? Woulda thought you'd be more mad than anything else. Us leaving you there.'

'I wasn't surprised.' Simon's voice had lost the teasing edge, and it took Kaylee a moment to process the words.

'What?'

'I mean, I suppose I was shocked, because the ship wasn't supposed to be leaving yet, but I wasn't really… surprised. I didn't expect to be on the ship very long.'

'Simon…' Kaylee's voice had worlds of hurt and pity in it.

'It isn't that I thought badly of him. Or of any of you really. It was just that he didn't… there was no reason for him not to leave us there.'

'Captain's a good man, Simon, he wasn't ever not gonna come back.'

'Be that as it may, I didn't expect him to.'

'Don't go all formality on me again. Why didn't you think we'd come and get you?'

'It's hard to…you get on well with your family, don't you?'

She was bewildered, but replied, 'I guess so. Me an my folks fight sometimes I guess, but it's always…'

'There to come back to.'

'Sure,' Kaylee said, as if this was as certain as the sunrise.

'One of the last things my father said to me… he had just bailed me out. I got caught somewhere I shouldn't have been, looking for information about River. And he had to come and pay for them to release me. It's not that I don't understand it… it was a big thing, it goes on your record, and he was at a dinner-party, so he had to explain his way out of that… I mean, maybe he did think I was just going mad, and River was fine. But she couldn't have been, and he knew that, because I gave him the letters. And I'll never know now whether he just didn't believe me, or he thought I was right but he knew better, or maybe he just didn't care. But he stood there and…' Simon's speech had got strung together, so he stopped.

'What happened?' Kaylee asked

'He told me if I did it again he wouldn't come and get me.'

Kaylee was silent, and Mal could feel her horror that a father could abandon both his children that way. Truth be told, he felt more than a little like strangling Simon's folks himself.

'So you see,' Simon went on, 'I had reconciled myself with the idea that the two of us were on our own now. I didn't expect to be anywhere very long. And it wasn't such a surprise to be left. But then they tried to… there were so many of them, and I fought, but I was never going to be able to stop them. So I got up there with her, and I was preparing myself to… I wasn't going to let her be burnt to death, or let her die choking. I couldn't do that… but when I looked at her, she was smiling. Just smiling. And she looked down at me and said, "Daddy's coming". Just like that. And I didn't know how to tell that there was no one to come for us.'

'And then the Captain came,' Kaylee finished.

'Yes,' Mal could hear the warmth in Simon's voice even without seeing the smile. 'Walking out of the smoke. I think that was the moment I was doomed.'

'Bet you went all weak at the knees and everything,' Kaylee giggled.

'Weak in the brain,' Simon corrected. 'I couldn't get my head around the idea that he was actually there. And then he got them to cut River down. He said that she was his, do you remember that? Well, ours, but that's not… I asked him, afterwards, why he had come back, and he didn't even know why I was asking. He just said that we were crew.' Simon's voice was wondering, as if he still wasn't sure why it had happened.

'Of course you're crew!' Kaylee exclaimed, her soft heart eager to make amends for all the wrongs done to Simon by those who should have looked out for him.

'I know that now,' Simon said gently. 'But back then it was in question. I don't think I believed that if… family is supposed to be the place that has to take you in, no matter what you've done. I suppose I thought that if family wouldn't, then no one else would either.'

'We're family now, Simon.' Kaylee responded warmly. She had moved across the room, and Mal imagined she had an arm around Simon.

'I know.' There was a crack in Simon's voice. 'I don't think I'd know how to behave on Osiris now. I've got to the point where…home is this place where I wake up and the walls are vibrating because of the engines, and I can hear my sister breathing next door. Where I go for a walk in the middle of the night and either I meet someone already awake, or within three minutes Mal's got his head out of his bunk telling me someone better be dead or dying if I'm going to make such a racket in the middle of the night.'

'He gets grouchy.'

'I know. One of these days though, I'm going to give him River's spiel about there being no night on a ship anyway.'

'Sweetie, sometimes I think you want the Captain to hit you.'

Simon laughed. 'Well that would be an interesting new level of dysfunction, especially given the fact that I seem to have tied Mal into my father issues.'

'You're not really…' Kaylee sounded unsure.

'No.' Simon's voice was muffled, and now Mal knew that Kaylee was hugging him tight to her shoulder. 'I'm just having a bad day.'

'Did I make it worse?'

'No, as usual you made it better.'

'Is it the Captain throwing scalpels at you yesterday?'

'How did you… did River…?'

'She told me it was a scalpel. I figured out that he was throwing things when you came out of there bleeding. You gotta stop letting him push you around.'

'He's the Captain. And he's sick, and I feel like I'm not doing enough to make him better.'

'What else could you be doing?' Unless you want to give him one of your own eyes to borrow, he'll just have to be patient, and start being nicer to you. No more scalpels,' she said firmly.

'I'll be sure and tell him that.'

'I'll tell him that. You go and sleep in your own bed for a while.'

'Kaylee, I'm not a child. Or a hormonal teenager, if that's what's bothering you. I can cope with being in the same room with him, even if I want him to…'

'Make with the sex with you, right now this minute?'

'Kaylee!'

'You look tired, Simon, that's what's bothering me. Go to bed. Else I'll drag you there myself, and who knows what might happen?'

He laughed. 'Okay. Wake me up in a few hours, okay?'

'I promise. Me and the Captain are just going to have a little talk.'

'Be nice.'

'Okey-dokey. Now bed!'

'Night.' Simon said, leaving the infirmary.

'Night-night,' Kaylee called back. She placed a hand on Mal's ankle. 'Now, being asleep is no excuse not to listen to this. You need to start being nicer to the doctor, okay? No more making him cry. Cause you're a good man, and good men don't make nice doctors who love them cry. Got that?'

Mal had to hold himself very still not to give into the reflex to nod assent.

Translations:
yúchûn - stupid/ignorant
húndàn - asshole/bastard