Disclaimer: Hikago bu shi wo de. It's a pity, really.
Author's notes: Yay! First summer session is over! Unit operations lab will suck my soul no longer. CELEBRATION CHAPTER!
Ahem. This is the chapter I've had the most fun writing thus far. For some reason I got the idea from my reviews that the readers really like cliffhangers. So … : smiles innocently : Yeah, enjoy reading. And like always, please review if the fancy strikes you …
Chapter 6: Alleyways, Aggressiveness, and Awkwardness (oh my!)
Hikaru kicked a pebble along the street, not knowing why he was in this part of town so late at night. Oh, who was he kidding, he was here because it was Akira's part of town, because the dark-haired boy had apologized for his actions earlier that morning. Piss, he finally admitted. It's really just because I want to see him and make sure everything is okay.
He knew from the beginning that Akira's concentrated, forceful eyes dragged him forth. Helplessly, he had followed the other boy into the world of Pro Go players, motivated by the drive and determination he saw in the other boy. But what he didn't know was when Akira had begun to have a different sort of draw over him; more recently of late, he wondered if the refined boy meant more to him than just a rival. Last night had confirmed his feelings.
As the last signs of lively daylight faded into the mysterious whispers of night, Hikaru knew that Akira would be nearing his house, and he wanted to there to meet his rival. It was then, that a disturbance in a nearby alleyway caught he corner of his eye. Men are disgusting, he thought surveying the situation. All he could see were two middle aged men surrounding a resisting third party with dark hair, a natural grace, and …
Wait … is that …Touya, Hikaru speculated, looking at the image through his bleached bangs. It … it is. Shaking his head ruefully, he stepped into the mouth of the alleyway.
"Hey," he cried in his sharpest, most attention commanding voice. "You two, leave him alone!"
The two men, obviously intoxicated, dragged a long look between Hikaru and Akira, before the one with the bag addressed Akira, "Daaamn, so you really are a guy." With that, he stretched out dirt encrusted fingers to the boy's sweater, as if to touch his chest just to make sure.
"Don't touch me!" Akira cried simultaneously pushing the guy away and stepping back himself. One hand clasped to his chest, chin lowered, he felt relief course through him, as the duo's footsteps retreated. Hikaru, he had not counted on Hikaru being there, nor did he want the other boy seeing him in such a situation.
"Touya, are you okay?" Hikaru asked, darting towards him.
"I-I'm fine," her replied, knowing very well that he wasn't. As he watched the hand against his chest tremble, he realized how not okay he was. Even more than the fear was the mortification of Hikaru seeing him in such a state, and so he tried to get rid of the other boy. "I just want to go home; you should as well. Your mother will be worried."
"I, my, WHAT?" Hikaru spluttered angrily, not being able to put his thoughts together. Here he was hoping that Akira had meant what he said in the morning, was hoping that he would be treated better. Now, another situation had arisen, and the other boy was still as cold and ungrateful as ever. "How about a 'thank you'," Hikaru muttered advancing towards the other boy, just to check on him.
"I said I was fine, Shindou," Akira replied quietly. Although his soft voice still held that authoritative edge, the dark haired boy felt his heart thump oddly, knowing very much that he felt anything but sure of himself.
"You know, you really should be more careful," Hikaru offered.
Something in Akira snapped, and he felt the biting response come to him before he could even think through it. "I'm fine on my own. Besides, what are you even doing in this part of Tokyo?"
"I just wanted to help you," Hikaru defended, voice rising in volume.
"And I told you," Akira snapped, "that I can take care of myself." God, it was times like this he really hated himself, hated his social awkwardness. What he really should have done was to thank the boy, to lean against the other boy's liveliness and strength.
"What if they had tried to take advantage of you or something?" Hikaru demanded voice loud as ever.
"That's ridiculous. I would have convinced him I was a guy, and everything would have been settled."
"Don't be so sure," Hikaru retorted darkly. "What if … what if … they had done something like this?" To demonstrate his point, he used his athletic superiority to pounce like a lion. In one fluid motion he had cornered Akira against the wall, pinning both of his hands above his head.
Gasping audibly, Akira tried to get out of Hikaru's grip, although all he managed to do was to scratch his hands against the abrasive, brick surface. "Shindou," he said, still struggling. "What are you doing?"
"I'm trying to make you aware," the other boy said, serious for once. Green eyes were earnest as he spoke. "What would you have done if they had tried to attack you? There were two of them."
Instinctively, Akira tried to step on Hikaru's foot in order to stun him before making an escape. The faster boy out-stepped him, and then moved closer so his body was almost in contact with Akira's. As Akira breathed in a heaving breath, his became aware of the fact that his sweater brushed against Hikaru's shirt.
He's so warm, he thought, head leaning back against the brick. I could almost give in… As he thought, he exhaled, feeling his body shudder at the nearness, heart dropping to his stomach … and even lower.
I can't be feeling what I'm feeling, he tried to rationalize. But in his heart he knew it wasn't true. He had long denied recognition of his feelings for the other boy. What had started as simple rivalry had gone terribly awry to a point that he couldn't go a day without thinking about Hikaru. And still, he couldn't help but feeling as if there was something wrong with his feelings, almost as if he gave into his attraction to Hikaru that he'd be committing some kind of crime. God, if only he was a girl, I'd … Shaking his head, he dismissed the idea knowing very well that what he felt went beyond gender. It was Hikaru as a person, not as male or female.
"Touya," Hikaru whispered watching as the slender boy in front of him licked his lips nervously. They're pink, and wet, and I want them, he thought. I … Touya…
Everything about the other boy was just so intoxicating, from his scent to the way he looked at the moment, very cute in his dazed state. "Touya," he repeated the name huskily moving in even closer, until Akira was pressed flat between the wall and him.
Glazed look on his face, Akira found it so hard to think and function. His legs had since turned to jelly; his stomach felt as if it were about to burst with butterflies. And when Hikaru's hips brushed against his, he thought he had lost all control. He flushed with the nearness, and all of the blood that wasn't in his cheeks seemed to have gathered below the belt. The more he tried to get it to stop, the more it seemed as if he couldn't.
"Touya," Hikaru whispered again, closing in.
No! he thought, competence flowing back to him. I'm not ready …not here … not like this. With a sudden burst of strength, he yanked his hands down and away from Hikaru's, yelping as he felt the back of his hands being scraped raw against the rough brick texture. Hikaru, sufficiently surprised, could do nothing as Akira shoved him away, hurrying towards the exit of the alleyway.
"Shindou," he said, pausing and turning around. "I … not …" With his heart beating as if he had just run a marathon, he couldn't focus on his thoughts at all. "I'm sorry," he managed to say, before dashing off for home. As he ran, he felt that self-loathing hit him again.
Why am I so socially retarded? he wondered. He wanted the other boy just as much as he wanted to take his next breath, but something had stopped him, had made him shy. Now he had blown it, and his pride wouldn't allow him to back to where he left the other boy stunned.
Author's notes: What did you guys think? Hehehe ... : grins :
Umm, on another note, as you can probably tell, I prefer an uke Touya. With time, he could be more aggressive. But I think he'd have a harder time coming to terms with his feelings, since I see the ever dignified, polite Akira as being further bound by ideas of social normality than Hikaru. I hope you guys can see where that comes from.