AN: I'm back! This won't be a super long chapter seeing as its 1:30.. But I read a story and got inspired so thought I'd get a chapter up! I know I know it's been forever... I'm sorry I've been supppppper busy… and also trying to think up more ideas.

Reviewers: Thank you so so so so so much for your reviews they mean so much to me 

Kitsune Kida: thank you so much for being my first reviewer! I'd definitely be interested in working with you (if the offer still stands) but before I think about that, I want to make sure that I'm updating regularly, have people who actually are reading, and have more of a plotline.

Mimsical Dream and princess kyra thanks as well! I hope you 3 are still interested in the story and that I don't disappoint you!

Disclaimer: I own nothing from the hp universe… -

--: thoughts

Locus POV

-- I can't believe I have to be here. This should be Cissa's job. She's his mother! She should come get the precious Draco from school. But no! Cissa was shopping or off doing some foolish thing and I have to pick up the slack. I have to take time off work at the ministry. I have to waste my precious time that I could have spent helping my dark Lord. --

As Lucius waited for Draco to come off the Hogwarts Express he over-heard the many parents waiting open armed for their children. His daw a few teary –eye's reunions and turned away in disgust. Everyone was talking about their child as thought hey were the air they breathed. --What soft-hearted imbeciles.--

Darling I'm so glad our baby's coming home!

Me too Dear, I've missed her so much. But I know how much she loves Hogwarts and I'm so proud of Hermione!

--Lucius scoffed. That stupid mud blood! He couldn't wait until his dark lord defeated that potter brat and Dumbledore. Then his son could be taught with only the deserving. His son… -- Lucious didn't love his son. He didn't know the meaning of love. But Lucius was proud of his son. – Draco is a pureblood and a Malfoy no less! He will always be better than any other student especially the granger girl he was about to turn away when the couple kept talking

"Can you believe she's the top of her class honey?

"I'm so proud of her! She said she got only O's. I think that's the best possible grade! "

Hearing this Lucius stopped – the Granger brat beat Draco? Never. They were only mudbloods they didn't know what they were talking about There was absolutely no way his Draco had been outshined by a stupid mudblood--

At that moment Lucius spotted Draco just as Hermione came launching into her parents' expecting arms. Lucius turned away from the scene in revulsion and stepped toward Draco.

"Come along Draco. Your mother is probably home by now awaiting your return.

Draco's POV

Draco would never admit it, but he wanted what the mudblood had. As he watched her hug her parents he wished his father would give him some sign he was loved... or even liked. Instead he told himself:

--There's enough tears and screams between the two of them you'd think someone died. What idiots I wonder if father knows. There he is. Why is he standing near the mudblood's parents for? Father would never associate with them. –

As Draco drew closer he started to worry again. – does father know? He's scowling, but is that at me or because he's scanning next the bud blood and her parents? I'm worried I want him to be proud of me I want him to want to help me… I don't want to get hit again. –

As Draco approached his fear steadily grew. On the outside though, he still looked the same. He was calm cool, and had the customary sneer.

"Hello Father."

Lucius barely nodded. "Come along Draco. Your mother is probably at home awaiting your return.

Draco nodded and followed his father.

-- would it kill his father to smile at him? He hadn't seen him for months, and yet all he got when he came home was a little nod? Oh and look there's scar head with his side kicks and hold up why is potter getting into some muggle thing with two people who look like they'd rather see potter dead? Surely that can't be his family? They must love saint potter-- Draco shrugged it off as Lucius gripped Draco's shoulder and they aspirated to Malfoy Manor

Indeed Cissa was waiting for Draco. He knew that Lucius though her ignoring her duties, b at the truth was she couldn't face it. She couldn't face seeing Molly or any of her old friends. All with children, all happy. She couldn't bear to think of all the time that had passed and who she had become. She'd married Lucius. She was foolish and believed in him. She loved him and she thought he loved her. Everything changed when Draco was born now she was sitting at home writing her son a letter she would never give him. A letter that would explain it all. Explain everything she was too cowardly to tell her son.

Dearest Draco,

There is so much I'd love to tell you. So much that is not safe to say right now. I'm writing this letter so that one day, when you're older you'll find out the truth. You're on your way home from your second year at Hogwarts as I write this. Oh how I love you. You'll never know though. I can't show you affection when you're father is around. I can't hug you as I'd like or kiss you or comfort you. I can't be a real mother to you. I miss you my baby. I am glad you are home though I fear you'd be safer at Hogwarts. I thought Lucius would be a good father. I knew he was aloof. But He said he loved me and years of being brainwashed by my mother lead to our marriage. I started wondering who the monster I married was when we first found out the sex of our first child was. And no dear, it wasn't you. He told me to abort it. I told him I did as he wished but then said I needed a vacation. I stayed away for months after that. I told him it was because I was sad. Because I didn't know how to handle myself. The truth was I went to molly. I told her the truth and how I couldn't abort the child. I told her I was regretting marrying your father and apologized for have betrayed her after leaving Hogwarts. I stayed at the burrow then. I stayed for 3 months until the baby was born. I put your sister up for adoption. I do not know her name or where she is now. I went so far as put her in a muggle adoption service so your father would not find her and killed her.

But I'm getting off track here. It was then I started doubting your father. Started doubting the dark lord. When you acme I was so happy. I wanted to hug you and cuddle you. I wanted to always protect and love you. I was never able to do any of those things Draco, and for that I am truly sorry. Your father believed in obedience and strident. He believed that showing affection was a sign of weakness and no son of his would ever be week. So, I rarely hugged you. I used to put up a fight and try... then he started hitting me. I continued for a while. Then, one day, you ran into the room, came up to me and lifted your arms for me to pick you up. As I did that you smiled and kissed me. It warmed my heart Draco… but it made your father angry. Up to then, he's only hurt me. That night… that night was the first night he hit you. After that night honey… I vowed I'd never let it happen again. I never hugged you since. I'm sorry I haven't lived up to my other promise.

I worry about you now though. You seem to be turning out to be your father and I am so scared. So very scared that you will eventually become a death eater. I worry you will never find love and never know what it is like to have true friends or feel true happiness. I don't know what to do honey. I want to run. I want to do anything but live with your father… but you stop me from leaving. I want to help you mature into a wonderful man, not a slave to the dark lord. You are home now so will stop writing a letter you will never see and go great you by kissing you on the cheek. But honey. All I want to do is hug and comfort you… oh how I love you.

Love,

Your mother.

Cissa took the sheet of paper, neatly folded it and put it in her diary where she knew no one would ever read it. Then standing up she straightened her skirt and put on a fake smile as she went to great her husband and child.

So? What do you think? I didn't expect the letter to be written. I wanted to write more but I'm too tired. It's now 2:30 and all I want to do is sleep before I have to get up and go to stats in the morning. : P Ok so what do you think? Is anyone reading this?

Poll

What charactors do you want to see paired up with? (I'm not sure if its going to be a romance yet)

ginny,

hermione (I hope not)

Pansy

Other

Original character

Out of these secondary charactors who do you want to see more of in draco's life

severus

dumbledoore

a death eater

sirius

other: can't think of anyone else plausible. I love lupin but doubt It'd fit well

Pleases please please review! I won't write unless I know at least a few people are reading! Thanks! Any opinions are wanted!