Elfy 13: But you did notice that the story is published in the "humor" section? twinkle
Arielle, i, Ellfine: Thanks so much for your nice reviews! I'm glad you liked the chapter! And now all the same from the Valar's point of view:

Chapter 2

At about the same time, in Valinor:

"Has he left?"

"Yes, a few days ago", Mandos answered without looking up from the book he was reading. He didn't need his brother Lórien, the Lord of Dreams, to say whom he was speaking about.

Lórien entered the hall, looking around carefully. But there truly was no one except Mandos. "That was… quite… something, this Haldir person."

"Yes indeed", Mandos replied with a sigh, massaging his temples.

"And yet, why did you let him go?"

"He threatened to start singing."

"Oh…"

"Exactly."

"Reminds me of that Glorfindel guy, back in the day. It's been a while since…" Lórien mused.

Mandos frowned. "If that had been all… that guy actually tried to get into my pants. Whenever I manifested in corporeal form, these curious elf fingers were all over me. I finally had enough and sent him back to Middle-earth."

Lórien sniggered. Of course he remembered. But he had another question. "But why didn't you give them mortal lives, just as you did with Lúthien?"

"Do you have the slightest idea how soon they had been back here, then?" Mandos coughed. "And then it would have started again."

"I see, that makes sense." Lórien pondered for a moment. "And why did you give only a mortal life to Lúthien? I mean, they all say that she moved you to pity, but both of us know that it should actually be 'drove you insane'." Lórien unhappily remembered that it had been the first time for him, the Lord of Dreams, to have a nightmare.

Again, Mandos frowned for a moment, remembering Lúthien's song which had resembled the song of mating cats, but then he grinned. "Are you asking in earnest? I mean, you saw her. Pretty poppet, and those boobs... if only I knew how to keep her from singing…"

Both Valar were silent for a while before turning back into the beings of spirit they usually were, returning to their duties, hoping that they wouldn't have to deal with this – fortunately rather rare – species of Really Annoying Elves…

End