Author's Note: Since readership of this is slowly increasing, here's the next chapter-thanks again to my KSF Jen 7/6/16 - I have added and changed dialogue and descriptions, making them more real and improving the flow
PART 3 – HISTORY REPEATS
November 11, 1980, 2:55 PM, PST
Julie was sitting at the desk in the study, talking on the phone with Debi Henderson.
Debi said, "It really would be no problem Julie, for Melissa to spend a few days with us. I know that Lydia and Rebeccah would love having Melissa with us and you need some time to yourself."
Julie replied thankfully, "Thanks Debi, but if I want to be by myself, I'll take a walk up to the North Field."
"Julie, you need more than that. Now, Matt is going to Sacramento to a pastors' conference tomorrow and me and the girls would love having Melissa here. Since they all go to the same classes at school and our home is nearer to school, you could pack enough clothes to last until Sunday, when we'd bring her home," Debi said, trying to sell her.
Julie sighed inwardly. She loved Debi and what she was trying to do but she was beginning to feel like she was being bludgeoned with a battering ram. Since the funeral, Debi had been loving and supportive...and maddeningly persistent. Women from the church had also kept constantly in touch; calling, dropping by with food and offers to take Melissa for playdates to give her some rest...but she would always decline. Julie was grateful for all the concern shown but she had always been private...especially during times throughout her life of great sadness and pain. Because of her background, she tended to withdraw to seek solitude in dark times. Although she appreciated all the love flowing toward them deep inside she just wanted to be left alone, just her and Melissa.
As each day had passed after his funeral, the attempt to go on and eke out a somewhat normal life without Dan was challenging if not daunting. The overall running of the ranch was done by David, Hank, and the hands but the normal every day personal lives of both her and Melissa had been altered...a huge piece of them had been cut off. The real grieving process had begun and with it the clinging on desperately to things connected to Dan. In this case Melissa, who was the one remaining living part of him that Julie knew she could still touch and hold was precious, so much so that she couldn't bear having her out of her sight longer then she absolutely had to. It was her way of keeping him from slipping completely away from her and their child was the lifeline now between her here on earth and him in the afterlife. With these thoughts in mind, Julie tried again...
"Thanks but really I couldn't impose that way," she said, feeling like she was the losing the battle.
But Debi had no intention of taking no for an answer. "The girls really want her to come, Julie, and they said Melissa wants to but she's afraid to leave you alone."
Julie suddenly felt guilty. She reluctantly decided wanting to keep her daughter around and close by as she was all she had was selfish. In an epiphany, she had realized that her own grieving was hurting the one person left to her, her child, who she was supposed to protect and help along her grieving process. It was far too much to put on a child and she was ashamed. She wondered if deep inside Melissa had built up resentment at her for isolating them as they dealt with their loss. That had been Julie's way throughout her life, to cut herself off from the world when she was hurting. The extraordinary thing was that Melissa had understood and insisted on the same thing, never leaving her side. But now that had to stop, Melissa was too young to deal with grief and she needed to be in a lighter, happier atmosphere.
"Okay Debi, you win. You can come and get her and her things after school. I'll convince her to go," she said, resigned.
"Thanks Julie, the girls are going to be so excited. And don't worry, I'll have Melissa call you every night. We'll be over at about quarter to four," Debi promised.
"Okay, bye,"
Julie hung up the phone with a sigh. She called Hannah and asked her to pack Melissa's suitcase, and her favorite stuffed toy, a cream colored pony her father had given her for her sixth birthday back in April. Melissa's bus was about to arrive and Julie put a sweater on over her black turtleneck to go out and meet her. Just as she got to the road, the yellow school bus arrived. Melissa alighted off the bus and ran into Julie's outstretched arms.
"Mommy, did Mrs. Henderson call you?" she asked breathlessly.
"Yes sweetie, she did," Julie answered. "Hannah has you all packed and ready when they come to get you at quarter to four. So we can have a snack before they come if you want."
"Thank you Mommy, thank you!" Melissa cried hugging Julie tight.
Fighting the feeling of abandonment Julie felt her eyes well up but she hurriedly brushed her hand across them to wipe the tears away. "You're welcome, darling. I want you to go and have a good time," she added with a tremulous smile.
As they made their way to the house, Melissa chattered happily about her plans with Lydia and Rebeccah Henderson. Julie listened and commented with false heartiness but inside she felt the beginning pangs of bleak loneliness. Tonight, for the first time in a long time, she would be totally alone. But she hid this from Melissa as they sat and had a snack of fresh baked chocolate chip cookies and milk that Hannah had set out for them. All too soon the doorbell rang and Debi, Lydia, and Rebeccah arrived. They collected Melissa's things and Melissa and opened the door to leave. Before they did, Melissa hugged Julie tightly.
"Mommy, are you going to be okay?" she asked worriedly.
"I'll be just fine, baby. You go and have fun," Julie reassured her.
"Okay but if you need me, call me," Melissa replied, sounding grown up. She looked at Julie and something about her expression was so reminiscent of Dan, Julie nearly lost it. She smiled as tears again filled her eyes.
"I will, sweetheart, I promise."
Melissa, Lydia, Rebeccah, and Debi all headed toward the station wagon parked in the driveway. They all waved at Julie before climbing in the car. With a brave smile, Julie waved back. She stood on the front porch watching the Henderson station wagon depart with a heavy heart. Sighing, she turned and headed back into the house, not noticing the forest green late model Mercedes that was driving up and turning into the driveway.
Julie walked into the parlor and sat down in the oversized easy chair that had been Dan's favorite. It was wide and cavernous, so much so that she and Dan both would sit in it evenings after Melissa had gone to bed. He would pull her to him and she would be cradled on Dan's lap where they would talk and snuggle until bedtime. Of late, this had become her favorite chair for it had retained the beloved scent of him; a mixture of horses, leather, and English Leather after shave lotion. She'd go collapse, sink in and let it swallow her up. She would then turn her head, breathe deeply and lose herself in memories of Dan. Julie did this now, wrapped in the chair and her memories...ignoring the sound of the doorbell ringing. She faintly heard Hannah answer the door and converse briefly with a man's deep, slightly gravelly voice; a vaguely familiar voice but she was unmoved. Hannah came into the parlor and timidly stood in front of Julie.
"Pardon me Miss Julie, but there's a man here to see you. He says he's an old friend of yours."
"An old friend of mine?" That vaguely familiar voice was now starting to intrigue her.
"Yes ma'am."
"Did he tell you who he was?"
Hannah shook her head. "No ma'am, he didn't."
Who could that be? Julie was tempted to tell Hannah to tell the visitor to come some other time, but her curiosity got the better of her. She brushed her ash blonde strands from her eyes as she rose from the chair. "All right Hannah, I'll be right out," she said with a sigh...
Pete had entered the foyer of the Bennett ranch house, let in by an older lady who must have been the housekeeper. He told her he was an old friend of Julie's but nothing more because he had wanted to surprise her. While he waited to be announced he strolled about and observed the surroundings. Although not nearly as grand as he was used to, it was definitely upscale...modestly elegant and appropriate for a once flourishing horse farm.
The door was medium walnut, polished to a glossy sheen with a window to its right where there was a small table, which held the day's mail. He walked over and placed his briefcase on the chair next to it. An antique brass hurricane light fixture hung down from the beamed ceiling in the center was throwing out a warm glow. The walls were painted ivory with highly polished hardwood floors and trim, and paintings of western prairie scenes adorned them. The foyer led back to a dining room, which in turn, led to the kitchen. Two doors, the one closest to the front which lead to the parlor; the other to the study, stood side by side. They were situated along the wall heading toward the dining room. A hardwood staircase and banisters, also highly polished, led to the second floor. He found the country style décor homey and appealing.
As she made her way to the foyer, Julie wondered who the visitor could be. She reflected on the sound of his voice and how it struck a chord somewhere deep inside. When she got to the foyer, the man standing there had his back to her; his broad shoulders made her heart quicken with recognition, remembering that sunny day they had met on the Santa Monica pier after what seemed like a lifetime. She noted his burnished unruly curls picked up the deep brown of his business suit. Another chord struck as she got closer to him. Sensing her presence he turned around slowly and grinned at her; the same sweet warm grin that hadn't changed, even in the passage of time. Julie took a deep breath when she realized who the man was.
"Pete, is that really you," Julie said softly, with wide shocked eyes.
Pete replied, "Yeah, It's me. How are you doing, Julie honey?"
A dam broke inside Julie. Before Dan, there was Pete...him and Linc, who she could always depend on, who had always been there for her. But Pete's and her relationship was always richer, deeper...and now, again here he was. Suddenly, all her pent up emotions from Dan's death and Melissa's departure came out with a vengeance. She rushed over to Pete and threw her arms around him, hugging him tight, Pete returned the embrace, holding her just as tightly...cradling her head as she buried her face in his shoulder.
"It's so good to see you, Pete. How is it that you always seem to show up when I need someone the most," she sobbed, tears running down her cheeks as she drew back to look at him.
"Where you're concerned I've always had a certain radar I guess. Hey now, I didn't come here to make you cry," he said kindly, gently wiping away the tears from her cheeks. "I heard what happened to Dan, Julie, and I came to help in anyway I can," he added concern showing in his warm blue eyes.
She shook her head. " You have no idea how much you coming here means to me. But how did you find out, I haven't called Linc and I didn't call you," Julie said curiously.
"I have my sources," Pete responded, smiling enigmatically. "Actually, your husband's life insurance policy was underwritten by my company."
"The life insurance...Your company?" she asked, surprised. "But I had no idea that H.C. Mutual Indemnity was your family's insurance company."
"Uh-huh. H.C. Mutual Indemnity is my family's business. The H.C. stands for Harrison Cochrane, my late father, who left me in charge when he passed on," Pete informed her. "All claims for over $50,000 come to my desk for final approval. So I came here."
"You came here...because of the life insurance?" Julie asked with a slim brow raised.
Pete met her dubious expression with his own, prepared to deliver an excuse to deflect any guess at an overt ulterior motive. Instead, like when she used to corner him on something he simply shrugged with his crooked grin.
"You caught me...when the file came across my desk I had to come...to make sure you were okay."
Julie smiled then became serious as she inquired, "But won't you be in trouble for taking time to come here?"
He shook his head. "As my assistant keeps saying I'm the boss. The family business is now mine. Or to be specific it became mine when my father died. And I actually spend a lot of time in the area. I moved up into a beach house I just had built on the coast of Monterey. I spend the week in Beverly Hills to be close to work and go to the beach house on the weekends," Pete replied. "Between my company's reputation and all the publicity of my divorce, in L.A. I can't even run to the corner store for a newspaper without getting mobbed."
"Monterey? I had no idea you were so close by. So how've you been since your divorce?" Julie inquired, concern showing on her pretty face.
Pete sighed, "I'm hanging in there. But never mind that, what about you, you look like you've been to hell and back. You've lost a lot of weight. Aren't you eating, sweetheart?" he asked, worry furrowing his brow.
"I haven't had much of an appetite," Julie admitted. "I do pick here and there but I haven't really been that hungry. I just don't find anything appealing. There's a huge lump in my throat and a hole in my heart," she added miserably, tears appearing again in her eyes.
Pete gently cupped her face in his hands, wiping the tears from her cheeks with his fingers. "I know angel, that's why I came. Knowing you like I do, you've probably done your best to keep on. But you can't do it alone, even though knowing you, that's what you're trying to do...keep everyone away. That's why I'm here, to help you anyway I can...I'm here for you," he added, brushing her ash blonde hair from her eyes.
She said softly, "Just like always."
Julie managed a tremulous smile through her tears. Remembering that it was late and Pete was a guest, she impatiently brushed her tears away and asked him, "Have you eaten yet?"
He shook his head. "No, as soon as I found out about Dan I had my jet fly me up to Monterey Peninsula, headed out to my place to pick up a car and here I am."
She took his hand and led him toward the dining room, "I'll get Hannah to fix you something right away," she insisted.
"Okay, but with one condition," Pete acquiesced. "That you join me and I'm not taking no for an answer. You know how I always hated eating alone," he added, eyes twinkling.
"I don't have to eat you know. I can just keep you company."
He shook his head. "Uh-uh...no deal. You're going to eat." With a mock scowl he added, "Don't make me feed you."
There was a tense split second then Julie sighed, then said, "Okay, you win... I'll have dinner with you."
"Groovy." He grabbed her hand. "Let's go then."
They walked hand-in-hand into the dining room where Julie offered Pete a chair. "Have a seat and I'll be right back," she directed, heading into the kitchen.
Pete sat down and scanned the dining room. The dining room, like the foyer, was simple and bucolic. But amidst the provincial yet sturdy room there was an old-fashioned hand carved cherrywood serving board, and a matching china cabinet, which held some delicate plates and figurines. Burgundy velvet drapes hung from the windows, and the table bore a same colored linen tablecloth. But his eyes focused on a painting on the adjacent wall, which appeared to be an original Frederick Remington displaying an outstanding action scene of a cowboy herding some buffalo. He was amazed by the touches of elegance throughout the seeming rustic dwelling of polished hardwood floors, and trim.
Hannah was just removing several homemade pot pies from the oven, the enticing aroma wafting through the air. She turned and spied Julie taking two plates from the cupboard then opening the silverware drawer to extract forks, knives, and in the next drawer, napkins. Julie then turned and almost bumped head on into Hannah who was standing there watching her with inquiring eyes.
"I can set the table for you, Miss Julie," Hannah said. "You can just sit and visit with your friend and I'll do that and serve you both."
"That's all right Hannah, I can set the table," Julie dismissed with a wave of her hand. "What did you make tonight, it certainly smells wonderful."
"Fresh baked chicken and lamb pot pies. I was just about to bring supper to the bunkhouse," she responded, "But I can serve the two of you first."
"Okay, but don't disappear so fast. I want to introduce you to someone who's a very old friend...in fact he's like family to me," Julie said, her spirits appearing considerably lighter than they have been.
"Yes, ma'am, I'll be right in," Hannah replied, reaching for a tray to place the pies upon.
Julie came back to the dining room and set a plate, fork, knife, and napkin in front of Pete and the same in front of the chair situated to his right. He smiled and thanked her and as she sat down commented, "This is quite a room, Julie. Not what I would have expected from a ranch house out here in the mountains."
"That's because Dan's mother, who was from back East in Boston, brought her family heirlooms out here when she married Dan's father. She died when Dan was ten and Hannah helped to raise him. By the way, I want you to meet Hannah."
"Hannah?...was that the lady who let me in?"
"Yeah... Her family works here at the ranch, as a matter fact they've been working here for the last 20 years."
Julie turned around at just that moment to see Hannah entering the dining room with a tray bearing two steaming pot pies, a server of fresh vegetables, two glasses and a pitcher of iced tea. Hannah set the tray down and poured the iced tea, placed a glass before each setting and with a pie spatula, served up a healthy piece of chicken and lamb pot pie, first to Pete, then to Julie.
"Thank you, Hannah, you've perfect timing. I want you to meet someone, an old and close friend of mine, Pete Cochrane," Julie introduced, gesturing toward Pete who courteously got to his feet and offered his hand with an engaging smile.
Hannah wiped her hand on her apron, and took Pete's proffered hand, shaking it in greeting. "How do you do, sir," she smiled shyly.
"I'm glad to know you, Hannah," Pete said politely.
"Her husband Hank is head trainer and sons Jim and Josh are some of the best young men in husbandry and breeding in the area," Julie pointed out.
Hannah blushed with pleasure at the compliment to her family. "Now Miss Julie, you shouldn't let the boys hear you say that. Their heads are way up in the clouds as it is. If they hear you say that, there'll be no living with them," Hannah admonished.
"Why not Hannah, it happens to be true." Julie smiled.
"Well, true or not, I'd best be going to feed them or they'll be fit to be tied. It was a pleasure to meet you Mr. Cochrane," Hannah said as she headed back toward the kitchen. "I'll be back in a few hours from the bunkhouse if you need anything else," she added.
"Thank you, Hannah. Don't worry, if we need anything, I'll get it," Julie reassured her.
Pete grinned and said, "You really are in your element here, Julie, it seems like you've lived here all your life."
Julie returned the grin. "Ever since Dan brought me here, Hannah, Hank, their boys, and David have all made me feel right at home." She picked up Pete's plate and spooned a helping of vegetables on it.
Pete raised a quizzical eyebrow. "Who's David?" he wanted to know.
"David Slade, Dan's business partner and best friend. He lives in a house about five miles down the road. His father and Dan's father both had joint ownership of the ranch."
"But this is a single family house. How is it that Dan's father and then Dan and you got to live here? Doesn't David or his family have anything to say about that?" Pete inquired as he began to eat.
"Apparently Dan's father purchased the partnership in the ranch from David's father when he had some bad gambling debts. That was back when Dan and David were just kids. David's mother left him and his father when she couldn't take it anymore. David's dad died when he turned thirteen and he moved in here with Dan and his dad. But he moved out when he turned eighteen and went to school to get a business degree. So when he graduated, he bought a stretch of land down the road and built a house on it for himself."
"So if David's father sold his interest in the ranch, how is he still a partner?"
"Dan took over the running of the ranch when his dad died and he returned from Vietnam. The ranch was left to Dan and feeling guilty about how everything happened between his father and David's father, he immediately invited David into partnership. He took over the business side of the ranch, registering the lines for breeding purposes, setting up the agreements with stud farms as far as the financial side. Training and breeding the horses, and entering equestrian competitions were Dan's roles," Julie explained.
"Wow, you really have quite a grasp of the business here," Pete replied, extremely impressed. "And raising a daughter at the same time. By the way, where is Melissa? I've been looking forward to meeting her." He glanced around looking for Julie's daughter.
Julie's eyes clouded slightly. "She's spending a few days with her two friends. I really didn't want her to go but I realized that I was wrong, clinging to her. It's been just the two of us since the funeral, she needed some fun. She's been so worried about me, and I've been worried about her. We make quite a pair," she added ruefully.
Pete reached for and squeezed her hand. "That's what families are all about, honey."
They ate in silence for a time. But while Pete ate heartily, savoring the simple but tasty fare, he couldn't help noticing Julie ate sparingly, picking here and there but not really eating. He became filled with concern, for he when he first saw her he had been alarmed at how much weight she had lost. She always had a slim and lissome figure but her grief had made her nearly skeletal.
Pete took a sip of his iced tea. "Julie, when all this happened why didn't you call me or Linc? You know we'd have been here the night Dan died. Even if Linc couldn't get out here you know I would have been," he said with resolve.
"I know, Pete. But I was in a daze. After everything had been done at the hospital and Dan had been declared dead, I was in such a state that the doctor had to give me a shot. And when I came home, I had to break the news to Melissa and believe me I'd have rather cut off my right arm than tell my baby that she had lost her daddy," Julie said, the memory of that horrible night causing her eyes to become filled with tears.
His heart breaking for her, Pete stopped and reached his hands to take and squeeze hers. "I know you would because that's you. Always thinking and caring for others in spite of your own pain. As a mother, I would expect nothing less from you, darlin'," he whispered.
Julie eyes filled even more at his show of support and care. "You're doing it again, Pete, saying something so sweet that it makes me cry. Just like old times," she sobbed.
The dinner forgotten, still holding her hands Pete pulled Julie to her feet. Wrapping his arm around her, he gently led her out of the dining room over to the parlor and together they sat on the sofa facing the stone fireplace at the far wall. The sun had gone down and although there was one lamp lit on an end table, keeping the parlor from total darkness, the room had a chill to it, because Julie shivered slightly.
"You're cold, honey...Do you want me to start a fire?"
She nodded gratefully, getting up and showing him where the kindling and firewood were stored. He proceeded to build a log pile and placed kindling in strategic places for maximum burning. In practically no time he had a roaring fire going. He replaced the screen and joined Julie on the sofa, putting his arm around her and cradling her head against his shoulder.
"Still cold?" he asked softly.
"Uh-huh," she replied, snuggling closer.
"Wait a few minutes and the room will get warmer," he reassured her. "In the meantime, just let me warm you up." He began gently messaging her shoulder, using friction to create warmth for her.
8:30 PM
Hannah, Hank, Jim, Josh and David Slade were all gathered around the long table in the dining room of the building known as "the bunkhouse" finishing their supper. Actually, it was a large lodge building situated behind the barn and stables which was the home for the live-in help. It was a comfortable place with a large dining room, a game room, a parlor with a huge stone fireplace, three full bathrooms, and sleeping quarters for the Travis family and the three other men who worked with the horses.
"Mom, this was great," Jim commented about the meal they had just finished.
"Yeah, terrific," echoed Josh, wiping his mouth on a napkin. They both got up from the table and headed for the game room.
Hank repeated his sons' approval, "Yeah, it was a great supper as always."
"I'm glad you all are full," Hannah said, getting up to clear the dishes. She headed for the kitchen with the first load of dishes to wash.
Hank leaned back grinned and called out, "You're a treasure honey, that's for sure." He stretched and yawned.
David Slade sat there at the table, toying with his fork in his half empty plate. Hank noticed David's preoccupied mood and curious, asked him, "Dave, is everything okay?"
David looked up, "Huh? Oh yeah, Hank everything's fine. Why'd you ask?"
Hank eyed David suspiciously, "Because you usually have a better appetite. You're always getting second and third helpings. Tonight you didn't even finish the first one. Hannah's gonna think that you don't like her cooking anymore," he growled good-naturedly. "So 'fess up, boy, what's eatin' you?"
David grinned sheepishly, "Can't hide anything from you can I, you old coyote. I was just wondering how Julie's doing," he added, a thoughtful look in his eyes.
"Hannah says that she says she's okay but she notices her crying when Miss Melissa ain't around. And Miss Melissa has gone to the Henderson's for a few days."
An interested light appeared in David's gray eyes, "Really? So she's all alone up at the house tonight?" he asked.
Hannah came in from the kitchen and heard David's question, "No she isn't. An old friend of hers just came to see her. A Mr. Cochrane," she stated, reaching to take his plate and silverware.
"Who?" David demanded, jumping to his feet.
"Pete Cochrane. Miss Julie introduced me to him as an old, close friend of hers. He seems like a really nice man, very polite and courteous."
"When did he show up? And why?" David asked with a touch of belligerence.
Hank looked at David quizzically, "Do you know the fellow?"
David turned and looked at Hank, "No I don't know him, but I know of him. She knew him when she lived in Los Angeles. He's a big shot millionaire from Beverly Hills. What's he doing here and what does he want?" he snapped, coming right up to her.
Hannah paled at his demanding attitude, "I don't know David, maybe you should ask Miss Julie," she suggested meekly.
David looked at Hannah and apologized, "I'm sorry Hannah, I didn't mean to bite your head off. I'm just worried about Julie. I think I'll head up to the house with you. You are heading up there aren't you? So I'll come with you."
Hannah nodded dubiously. She found it hard to trust David Slade, lately at times he acted like he owned the ranch and since Dan's death, he'd been getting more and more demanding. But she kept quiet about it, figuring that Julie had enough to worry about.
"Okay then, let's go," David took Hannah's arm and led her out the door with Hank watching speechlessly, stunned by what had just taken place.
9:00 PM
Silently Pete and Julie sat huddled together, drawing warmth from the fire and each other. Soon, the fire emitted enough warmth that Pete didn't need to rub Julie's shoulder to warm her, but he continued to stroke her gently, giving comfort as she allowed herself to relax against him. His thoughts were totally on the enormity of the burden she was carrying, and his heart constricted in pain for her. He wished he could do something, anything to take the agony from her life, and he felt frustrated. She appeared even more vulnerable and he was filled with the familiar, overwhelmingly strong protective feeling for her, even more than he'd ever felt before.
Pete was also rediscovering the fact he had known all along, that he was deeply in love with Julie and had always been. He was aware that he had to allow her to grieve, for he knew how deeply she loved Dan. This was an undeniable fact, and Pete, no fool to begin with, knew it. But, he also knew that he wanted his shoulder to be the shoulder she leaned on now when she needed one. But he wasn't about to push her or complicate her life any more than it already was. She had enough to deal with and he would be damned before he would add to her burdens.
"Pete," Julie asked softly.
"What, angel?"
"Can I ask you a question?" she inquired tentatively.
"Sure," he replied. "What's on your mind?"
Julie lifted her head from his shoulder to look him in the eye. Pete looked at her, waiting for her to speak. "What really happened with you and Donna?" she queried.
Pete's eyes, which had been warm and affectionate, suddenly became guarded. He pushed back to look directly at her and asked a touch warily, "Why do you ask?"
Julie pressed forward, "I just get a feeling that you're still hurting about it. Earlier, when I asked you, you changed the subject pretty fast. We used to confide in each other about everything and I hope we still can. Besides," she added, "You've been comforting me all night. Let me do the same for you."
Pete sighed heavily. "I appreciate that, honey, I really do but I came here to help you not vice versa."
Julie admonished him lightly, "Pete Cochrane, are we close friends or aren't we?"
"Of course we are but-" he began helplessly.
Julie cut him off. "Then, please tell me so I can help you like you've helped me?" she pleaded.
Pete surrendered, "Okay, I know when I'm licked. I can't refuse you anything. But I'm warning you, it's a long story and not very interesting."
"I didn't ask you to tell me for entertainment purposes. I just want to help my close friend, who's in pain," she insisted.
With a sigh, Pete began, "Remember last year when we all go together when I told you that I had changed my mind about having kids and Donna still didn't want them?"
Julie nodded.
"Well, because of that, we began to drift apart. Also, at that time, my father was dying and he was getting me ready to take his place in the business so between being at his bedside and at the office, and Donna pursuing her career, we hardly saw each other. But, we both wanted to save the marriage so we started seeing a counselor."
"Did that help?" Julie wanted to know.
"I thought that it was beginning to. We began talking to each other again instead of at each other. One night, we went out to dinner together and it was great, just like at the beginning. Well, we both got drunk and came home to the beach house in Malibu and made love all night. It was like our honeymoon all over again. We were really beginning to turn things around, or so I thought," he recounted with a sad expression. "About a month and a half later, I was in the study at home going though some bills and I saw a bill from Donna's gynecologist for a pregnancy test. And then I saw a bill from some women's health clinic. When I confronted her about it, she admitted to finding out that she was pregnant and then she lowered the boom by telling me she immediately went to the clinic to have an abortion afterward."
"Oh, Pete," Julie breathed, outraged and saddened for him.
Pete laughed bitterly, "She didn't even wait to tell me she was pregnant first, she just went straight to that place from the doctor's and got rid of our baby." He scowled darkly, the memory bringing all the anger back. "So I packed up and moved out."
Julie's eyes were wide with shock and sorrow for him. She reached over and gently brushed a stray curl of his hair from his eyes. "I'm so sorry. I don't know what to say," she whispered.
Pete took her hand and held it in both of his, his eyes filled with the pain of remembrance. "You don't have to say anything, sweetheart," he said. Still holding her hand in his left, he took his other hand, reached and caressed her cheek with a butterfly touch. "Wow," he said shaking his head with disbelief. "I thought I was okay but I guess I really needed to talk about it," he realized with a touch of wonder.
"Haven't you told anyone else about it?" Julie asked, looking intently into Pete's face.
Pete nodded, "Yeah, I told my mother about it, but not everything like I did with you tonight. This is the first time I've actually felt like I wanted to talk about it." He looked at her raptly, "Just like before, I could always tell you anything." He reached up and ran his finger along her delicate jaw, his blue eyes burning into her brown ones.
"I could never, ever do that," Julie said with conviction. "Have an abortion. Just flush out a baby created in love by me and the man I loved." She shuddered at the thought. "When I became pregnant with Melissa, Dan and I were thrilled. Even thinking about aborting her was impossible. And now she's the joy of my life," she added, her eyes shining.
"I guess Donna didn't really love me. She sure as hell didn't trust me," Pete replied dourly. "Well, remember I did tell you once I made a wrong choice," he added significantly.
They both stared deeply into each other's eyes as they cuddled together, and it appeared as if the last eight years had evaporated. Pete continued gently stroking her soft cheek, trailing his hand to brush her hair out of her eyes. "You've always been so beautiful, Julie, both inside and out. I've really been missing what I had before; the closeness with you and Linc, but mostly with you. Of all the mistakes and bad choices I've made since we left the force, the worst by far was walking away from what I had with you," he confessed. "That was the chief bonehead move of my whole life."
Julie lowered her head avoiding Pete's steady intent gaze, "You were the one who broke it off between us," she barely whispered.
"I know, honey. You wanted a family and I didn't so I did what I thought was noble, let you go to find someone to give you what you wanted even though it hurt me like hell and I knew it hurt you. But the ironic twist was that when I got what I thought I had wanted, I found out that it wasn't what I wanted after all. I wanted what you wanted. But by that time, it was too late," he lamented. "And when I saw you a year ago when all three of us got together to help the Captain, the old feelings for you came back." He reached and captured her chin in his hand and drew her face to within inches of his. "I've thought of you everyday since."
Pete leaned in, delicately touching his lips to Julie's. They kissed gently, hesitantly, both wanting to give in to the mounting passion but both realizing the different circumstances they were immersed in so they mutually held back. However, they continued with the kiss, totally absorbed until they were distracted by a knock at the parlor door, which was partially closed.
"Excuse me Miss Julie, I don't mean to disturb you but David Slade is here," Hannah called hesitantly from the parlor doorway.
Pete and Julie abruptly broke away from each other. Julie got to her feet and walked around the sofa toward the door, turning on another lamp in the room. She appeared flustered and a tad guilty at being found in an intimate embrace with a man who wasn't Dan one month after he was gone.
She nervously brushed her hair back from her eyes and responded, "That's all right Hannah, tell him I'm in the parlor." She sighed and shrugged apologetically to Pete.
Pete tried not to sound it but he was slightly irritated, "What do you suppose he wants?" He too, rose and walked over to where Julie stood.
"I couldn't begin to guess. Maybe some business issue that he feels needs my attention," Julie said, puzzled.
David stepped into the room. He threw a glance at Pete and then smiled charmingly at Julie, "You've been keeping yourself hidden lately, girl, I've been missin' you," he said heartily. "How've you been?"
Trying to keep things impersonal, Julie returned the smile politely. "I'm okay, David. Just been trying to pull things together for the month and Christmas. Our austerity program months are upon us," she added matter-of-factly.
"I know it," he responded.
Pete cocked an eyebrow, "Austerity program months?" he inquired curiously.
Realizing that she had forgotten her manners, Julie apologized, "Oh I'm sorry. Pete, this is David Slade, who is the business partner here at the ranch and Dan's best friend. David, this is Pete Cochrane, an old, close friend of mine. Pete came up to see me after he'd learned about Dan," she added, performing the introductions.
Pete offered his hand, "It's good to meet you," he said warmly enough to begin with but his smile froze on his face when he picked up on David's attitude. He was slightly taken aback by the underlying hostility coming from the other man; displayed when David looked disdainfully at the proffered hand then reluctantly took it in a sight shake as he smiled back blandly, his eyes cold and suspicious.
"Likewise, Cochrane," David replied but not really meaning it.
He turned his attention back to Julie, "About the finances, I was wondering if we could talk about them tomorrow sometime. Dan had pretty much mapped out the plans for the winter months with me before the accident and I want to go over it all with you. Maybe we could get together and have lunch?" he questioned.
Julie sighed, "I suppose I should. The holidays will be here before long and we have to make sure we're going to make it till May. By the way, I did put in the claim for Dan's life insurance benefits, I should be hearing from them soon."
"Life insurance?" David asked blankly.
"Oh, that reminds me," Pete interjected, a look of realization on his face. "The main reason I came out here to see you, Julie." He stepped into the foyer, to retrieve his briefcase. He returned to the parlor, placed the case on a chair opened it and drew a check out to hand to Julie. "Here's the benefit check from my company."
Julie examined the check unbelievingly, "Oh Pete, you have no idea how much this is going to help," she said gratefully. She threw her arms around him and hugged him. He returned the hug wholeheartedly, much to the chagrin of David Slade.
"What company is that?" David demanded, taking the check from Julie's hand to see for himself.
Pete eyed him steadily as he leisurely broke free from Julie's embrace, "H.C. Mutual Indemnity. Dan had a life insurance policy taken out with us. And since his death was investigated completely as an accident, the benefits are payable immediately to his widow as beneficiary," he replied evenly, standing close to Julie loosely holding her elbow.
David noted the Pete's signature, "Do you as CEO always deliver beneficiary checks to your policyholders in person, Cochrane?" he asked sarcastically.
Pete's eyes narrowed slightly at David's bellicose demeanor. He replied lazily, "No I don't Slade, but Julie's a special case. I wanted to make sure she got the money personally. We've been friends a very long time," he added tellingly, beginning to feel a strong dislike for David Slade.
"I didn't know that Dan had taken out a life insurance policy for you, Julie," David said, ignoring Pete. "I mean, he usually told me about any type of assets or insurance policies as his business partner," he added with a touch of dismay.
Julie eyed him curiously, "Dan took it out when we were first married, Dave. He wanted to make sure that if anything happened to him, I'd have enough money take care of me and Melissa when she was born."
"He never told me about that," David persisted.
Julie sighed, "I was his wife, David. I'm sure there were a few things that he chose to tell just me even if you were his business partner and best friend." She took the check from his hand and turned to Pete, "Thanks again, you just saved my baby's Christmas," she said with a grateful smile.
"Just call me Santa Claus, sweetheart," Pete said giving Julie a fond smile.
David's eyes narrowed at the term of endearment. He spoke sharply to gain her attention. "So Julie, how about lunch tomorrow to talk business," he wanted to know.
"All right David, come here at quarter to noon. I'll have Hannah make up something then we'll go over the books. However with this check, the money slated for the house can go back to the business," she consulted her wristwatch. It was almost ten, "We can discuss this all tomorrow."
"Okay Julie, I should be heading home anyway. I'll see you tomorrow," David said as he headed for the front door. "Good night," he nodded at Pete briefly, dismissing him. With a frown and a shrug, Pete turned and headed back into the parlor.
Julie responded, "Good night, David." She walked over to the door with him to let him out and closed the door as he left. Julie turned and headed for the parlor where Pete stood waiting for her.
"What's that guy's problem, Julie? He's not exactly sending me welcoming signals," he demanded, irritated. "As a matter of fact, he had me just about ready to pop him one in the mouth," he added sourly.
"Take it easy on him, Pete. He's taken Dan's death as hard as I have. He's probably just concerned about me," Julie replied soothingly.
"Well, tell him he doesn't have to worry about me. I'd be the last person to hurt you in anyway and if that's what he's insinuating, he's way off base," he said resentfully. He looked at his watch, "Look honey, I've got to split, too. I have a forty-five minute drive back to Monterey and it's ten thirty." He reached for his briefcase, "Dinner was terrific. I'm only sorry that we didn't have a chance to finish our "dessert." He grinned wickedly.
Julie slapped his arm. "You're incorrigible Pete Cochrane." She walked with him to the door. Suddenly she perked up with a light in her eyes. "Do you have luggage with you?"
Pete turned and looked at her, "As a matter of fact I do. I thought that depending on how you reacted to seeing me, I'd check in to an inn or motel close by so I could be near just in case. It's in the car. Why?" He wanted to know.
Julie gazed intently into his eyes, "I have a very comfortable guest room upstairs. And Melissa's away until Sunday. I was dreading being alone here until then. So how about staying here?" she offered.
Pete examined her contemplatively, "Really? You want me to stay here with you?"
"That's what I said."
He smiled indulgently, "Okay, sweetheart, like I said before, I can't refuse you anything. I'll go get my bag out of the car."
"Okay, when you come back in, I'll show you to the room. It's right next to the master bedroom, which is mine," Julie informed him.
Pete went over to the door to go and hesitating, turned to watch as Julie went over to the sofa and sat before the waning fire, stretching before it like a sleepy kitten. Lingering, he watched her as she reached her hands toward the fire, creating a most fetching picture. The dancing firelight played on her silky ash blonde tresses, making them appear like molten gold. Her eyes reflected the flames, light from the hearth glowing in their sable depths. Enchanted, he went over to where she was perched, her legs tucked up under her, and knelt in front of her, reaching up to take her hand. She took his hand in both of hers, rubbing and squeezing it affectionately.
"I thought you were going to get your luggage, Pete," she said yawning sleepily.
"I am. You just made such a lovely picture sitting here before the fire, I had to see for myself if you were real or a vision," he replied softly.
Julie smiled, "I'm real. So go get your bags and I'll show you to your room."
"Yes ma'am, right away." Pete got to his feet and kissed her on the forehead, "I'll be right back."
Julie yawned and stretched then rose from the sofa. The fire was dying and she made sure that the embers were not close to the edge. She replaced the screen, then reached to turn off the lamps in the parlor. She headed toward the foyer and as she got there, Pete opened the door and entered, bearing his suitcase and shaving kit. He looked at her and inquired, "Are you sure this is okay, me staying here?"
"Of course. Come upstairs with me and I'll show you to the guestroom."
She turned off the foyer light and turned on the light in the upstairs hallway. She then led the way up the stairs.
When they got upstairs, Julie turned to Pete and said, "The guestroom is the last room on the right, my room is just before it and there's the bathroom." She gestured to the room directly opposite the stairs at the end of the hall. "The linen closet is on the left if you need any towels, soap, washcloths," she finished in a helpful manner.
"Thanks, Julie. You're the hostess with the mostest," Pete replied with a grin. He walked over to the door she had indicated and turning on the light switch, and Julie followed him in to make sure he was set for the night. He told her he was.
"Well, I'm going to turn in. I'm right next door if you need anything. So good night, Pete," Julie said sleepily. "And thanks for staying here with me tonight." She stood on her toes and kissed him on the cheek.
"You're welcome, honey. And good night to you too," he gave her a quick squeeze and a kiss on her cheek. "I'll see you in the morning." He began unpacking his suitcase.
Julie turned and left the room. She then turned and entered her bedroom, closing the door and turning on the lamp on the nightstand. She sighed and sat on her bed, thinking about the events of the day. Pete's unexpected arrival was a pleasant surprise but she was really amazed by how truly glad she was to see him.
When Melissa left with the Henderson girls, she was dreading being completely alone in the house for the first time since Dan died. Julie had wanted Melissa to go for her own good, but she knew that she had been clinging to her daughter because she was a connection to Dan. She was beginning to really accept that Dan was gone for good and the thought was too much to bear at times. Even sleeping in their bed, she would cry herself to sleep, missing his long, lean presence, his tender lovemaking. That was a void that seemed as vast as the Grand Canyon. There was only one other man that she had loved like that in her life. And now, that man was here, in the next room. Julie was experiencing mixed emotions, she knew that she still loved and missed Dan but when Pete arrived and comforted her in the sweet way he had always done with her, she felt old feelings that she hadn't felt in over eight years.
She didn't call Pete when Dan died for a reason, she knew that in her highly emotional state after Dan was gone that seeing Pete again would be a like opening a dam. Before, he had always managed to be there when she needed him, and he had shown his protective attitude toward her on a regular basis. And he had literally saved her life countless times when they worked together on the Squad.
Julie knew then what her reaction would be if she saw Pete again. But she also felt that she needed to be strong for her daughter, and his tender support tonight was like a catharsis, helping her to release some of the grief she kept inside to spare Melissa. And Pete was wrestling with his own demons as well. What a horrible, painful time he had experienced, the betrayal of his wife and the death of his father, one after the other. He had tried to be casual about it but she had seen the concealed pain in his eyes.
The kiss tonight was one out of mutual need to be comforted, she told herself, both of them in deep pain and needing relief. With a sigh, Julie got up and began to undress for bed. She then climbed into the bed and shut off the lamp, laid there and waited for sleep to come. Surprisingly, for the first time in over a month, she didn't have to wait long...
-–-
In the guestroom, Pete had unpacked his bag, stored his clothes and got undressed to his shorts. He was kind of glad he had the foresight to pack a bag at his beach house and throw it in the car before driving out here, because regardless of Julie's reaction to seeing him show up, he had planned to stay somewhere close by to make sure she would be okay. But he was pleased that was unnecessary because everything has worked out better than he could have hoped. He climbed into bed, and lay down, sighing as he began to wind down from the day's activities...
He was still extremely concerned about Julie, she seemed to be vacillating between calm and extreme sadness. Having known her for so long, he knew her tendency to cut herself off and hide from the world and in their conversation at dinner, she all but admitted that was what she was doing. He wondered if she was dealing with her grief in a healthy way, because it seemed that she was fighting breaking down and letting out the grief that was inside her, trying to be strong, for her daughter and even her help. Pete wasn't surprised, because that was Julie, always putting everyone else before herself. That was one of the things he loved best about her but in this case she needed to allow herself to purge the overwhelming pain and loneliness that he knew she was feeling. Her missing Dan was fully apparent and was to be expected.
But he wondered why Dan's business partner David Slade was so unfriendly towards him, that was unexpected. The man did everything in his power to let Pete know that he didn't like him. This puzzled Pete, because he had never seen the guy before and hadn't a clue as to why David would be so openly hostile. Another thing that gnawed at Pete was David's reaction to Julie informing him about Dan's life insurance policy.
He wondered Why would he get so uptight about having not known of it? After all, married couples keep life insurance policies all the time and the policies are between the couple and nobody else. Even if he was the business partner, it was Dan and Julie's private affair, and David shouldn't get so bothered by his being uninformed about it. Pete felt more than a little curious about that but began to get sleepy. He yawned and closed his eyes as slumber arrived.
NEXT...CONFRONTATIONS