Greg kissed him, allowing their tongues to duel lazily as aftershocks shot through his body.
Smiling against Greg's lips Nick pulled back. "Ya know what Greggo?" He asked.
"What?" Greg arched an eyebrow.
"I think I'm in love with you," Nick murmured, wrapping an arm around his waist, the truth no longer making him fearful, but comforting him when he needed it the most.
Greg's smile fell away and he lowered his eyes, realizing that the only reason that Nick was saying it was because they'd had sex, just like everyone else that he'd been in love with.
Nick looked worried, trying to get Greg to look at him. "What is it G?"
"You say that now and it's only because we screwed around," Greg replied almost angrily, stung by how he had once again allowed someone to use him for their own pleasures, neglecting what he felt.
"That's not it at all," Nick argued. "I've felt something for you for awhile." He felt hurt by how quick Greg was to dismiss his feelings.
Greg shook his head. "Yeah usefulness. The lab rat, always quick on the job, the new CSI, always willing to take your cases," He spat, anger present in his eyes that Nick had never seen before. "A good little fuck toy."
Nick felt horrified. "No, no one thinks of you like that, least of all me." He argued, wanting desperately for Greg to believe the truth behind his words.
"Eric thought of me like that." Greg whispered the name of his ex. "He thought I was nothing more than a useless piece of shit," Words began to spill out of his mouth, and he was helpless in his attempt to stop them before he told Nick what had happened, he couldn't help it as he floated into the past that haunted him every day of his life.
Greg had met Eric a few years before when he had gone to a convention and had immediately sought out the good looking man in an attempt to make his feelings for Nick to go away. At first it had been so nice, Eric made love to him, not questioning the reasons why Greg often seemed closed off and unable to communicate exactly what he wanted and how he felt.
Eric had even moved to Las Vegas with him, which in a way had been one of the hardest things that Greg had ever had to go through. He had no longer been able to have Warrick, Nick or anyone from work over in fear that they might figure out exactly what he was. He couldn't stand being hated by anyone, he just couldn't. And that was where things had gone frighteningly wrong with Eric.
One night Greg had returned home late for work to find Eric in bed with someone else, he'd freaked out unable to believe that the man who claimed to love him so much was capable of treating him like that, of disrespecting him in such a manner. He'd fled his apartment to get away from the sight that continued to plague him, when he'd gotten the courage to go back home he'd been filled with an anger so powerful that all he'd been able to do was scream at Eric as soon as he saw him. What he hadn't planned on was the reaction that Eric would have.
Eric had hit him over and over again. He didn't stop until Greg had been unable to move, and was curled up on the floor in a ball, whimpering, blood sliding down his face. The next morning he had called into the crime lab claiming to be Greg's brother visiting from San Francisco, and told Grissom that Greg was frightfully ill. Grissom, as busy as he was hadn't even really questioned it and hung up the phone, it had been months until Greg had been able to break up with Eric after defending himself desperately with his fists and no one had even noticed the various bruises that decorated Greg's body for a long time and how he had flinched every time that he had been touched.
Months later Greg realized that the reason he hadn't been willing to let go of Eric because of his discretions was because he was trying so hard to let go of the feelings that he had for Nick and what those feelings could mean for him and his career.