Chapter 8

Jackie paced around her living room for what seemed the millionth time. Today was the day, no more putting it off and no more questions and worrying from the gang. She had told Steven, now she needed to tell everyone else. But how would they react! That was what scared Jackie the most. Would they give sympathetic glances, or gather her up in a hug, call her a slut? What? At that moment, Jackie would have given anything to be psychic.

Jackie sat on the couch and let out a shaky breath, things were too different. After she would tell them, they would know why she wasn't the same anymore. Why she acted more mature, why she was distant. Would they pity her? Stay away from her? They would probably stay away, afraid she might have a mental breakdown. There wasn't anything wrong with the new Jackie, she was older, mature, and wiser. She was probably better to be around, better than spoiled, selfish, and annoying Jackie. It would have been a change for the better, if only the change had a better reason. Jackie stopped her pondering to answer the door, which had clearly rang.

It was Steven. Oh, of course it was Steven. The only one who ever came to her house. But in all honesty, she liked it that way. It was nice to have a secret she could keep.

"Hey." He said in that gruff tone, but secretly oozing concern. He had changed. In a good way, but hell! They were both still scared shitless.

"Hey yourself" She gave a small smile, applying a sweet kiss to his lips, and hugging him. He wrapped his arms carefully around the small woman. No doubt she was easy to break. Jackie let out a content sigh, if things could stay like this.

Hyde let go, and walked her to his car. He opened her door and proceeded to his own. The drive was rode in complete silence. Until Jackie broke it.

"Steven….are we…..do….do you want……ummm…to be….what I mean is….are you and I…..in a….relationship?" The last word was said meekly.

Hyde froze, this wasn't the question he was hoping for. Relationship? He had never been in a relationship. They were always falling apart. What if he got hurt as well.

"Jacks, I don't…know. Can we talk about this later?" Jackie turned her head quickly to the window, she wasn't surprised. Why would anyone want to be in a relationship with her? She was dirty and foul. He was better, he deserved better. What was she? She was…trash. She said in a monotone voice "It's alright, I understand."

Before he could say anything else, they had arrived and she had quickly gotten out of the car. Aiming for the basement. Jackie walked down the stairs and paused at the door. She felt his presence behind her and walked through the door. Surely enough, everyone was there.

It almost made her want to laugh, they were almost always there. They were so dependent on each other. They could be, they were allowed. Because, none of them had ever let each other down before. Maybe….maybe they wouldn't let her down. Maybe she could count on them to always be there, she had become one of the group hadn't she?

Jackie didn't bother to sit, she took her place in front of the TV and turned it off. She turned around and stood nervously before them. Each one complaing.

"Jackie, man, we were watching Charlie's Angels!"

"Jaacckkie, you're in the way of the hotness, Fez needs the ladies."

"Uhh, Jackie, not that we wouldn't love to watch you but, ooh that's right, we don't"

Jackie smiled at their comments. Something she never would have done before, but it was different now. She knew Eric never meant it when he dissed or burned her, well maybe he did, but not as much as before. Hyde took a seat on the couch, waiting, ready to catch her if she fainted…or something.

Jackie looked at her setting, on the chair to the left of the couch was Michael, Eric, Steven, and Fez on the couch, and Donna on the right of the couch. Her stomach twisted and turned with every breath she took, she didn't know if she could do this.

"Guys, listen, I have something I need to tell you. Umm, I don't know if you've noticed I've been different lately."

Jackie looked down, this was so much harder in real life, and she had a speech ready and everything. Donna looked at Jackie.

"Jackie, does this have something to do with the Kelso incident?"

Jackie looked at Donna, tears present, yet not ready to fall.

"It has everything to do with that Donna."

Everyone now had their full attention on her, waiting to hear the big secret. It was a secret they wouldn't be happy to gossip about, a secret they would all secretly chuckle about with close friends. It was a secret that they all had at the back of their minds, it would make them think. And ponder, and it might hurt them.

Jackie inhaled sharply "When I was in New York, for the summer. Some things happened over there. Bad things, really, really, really bad things."

Jackie cleared her throat and smiled at them sadly. Was she really ready to tell them? She would have to, the water works had started. Eric looked at her shockingly.

"Jackie what happened? You can tell us, we won't tell anyone."

Everyone muttered a "yeah" and "It's okay Jackie"

Jackie looked up from her hands, and said in the smallest voice she could possibly posses. "I was raped."

But it was heard. It was heard because everyone's attention was on her, the silence that overtook the basement, made you think you were deaf it was so quiet. Donna looked like she was about to cry.

"Jackie….you didn't say anything…and, and you just went on like everything was okay? Jackie, are you okay?"

Jackie wiped her tears "No, but I will be. I'm….I'm getting there. Things will turn out for me." Jackie nodded affirmatively.

Donna stood up and hugged her friend fiercely. Jackie hugged her back and replied in a small voice "But…I can't do it alone. I need you, and my friends. Because if anyone isn't going to be there. I would like to know now, I don't like disappointment, especially now."

Donna let go and told Jackie "Don't worry, we're not going anywhere."

Eric got off the couch and gave Jackie a hug, which surprised her greatly, but she welcomed it all the same, she had never gotten a real hug from him. It was nice. He pulled back and said "Yeah, Jackie. Anything you need, but are you okay physically, I really think I should tell mom. She could check up on you."

Jackie shook her head, "No it's really okay. When I came back to Point Place, I went to the doctor's. I'm okay, there were tears. But they healed. I'm okay"

Jackie looked to Michael and Fez who were still sitting. They still had a look of shock on their face, an indescribable look really, almost disbelieving. Jackie kneeled in front of Michael and Fez.

"Guys? Michael? Fez?" They both looked to her and brought her into an enormous hug, holding on to dear life. Jackie laughed into the hug and felt tears of joy and love pour down her cheeks. These people loved her, they wouldn't leave her. They would all help her get better. She would get better. Jackie pulled out of the hug and smiled at them. "Thanks, I really think I needed that." She turned to everyone else. "All of this, thanks."

They all nodded sadly, even with Jackie's bright mood. They still couldn't believe the travesty that was brought upon their own friend. But Donna was getting mad.

"Jackie…how can you….just how can you go on like everything isn't okay? I mean, Jackie….you were raped. How can you move on like everything is rainbows and sunshine." Donna had tears on her face as well.

"Donna, it wasn't easy, it's taken me awhile to get this better. I was such a mess before. But I had Steven. Steven has been such a good friend to me this whole time. He didn't pressure me to answer his questions, he waited until I needed to tell him, until I came to him. I'm going to be alright Donna I swear." Jackie hugged her tall red-headed friend once more, before sitting down on the arm of the couch.

Unknown to anyone, Hyde had cringed when she said "good friend". Is that what he really wanted? Her as just a friend. For once in his life Steven was becoming dependent. He needed to talk to her.

Eric looked from Jackie to Hyde "So what….are you two dating, or like each other."

Jackie cleared her throat and stood up "That's debatable, but listen I have to go. I'll be back tonight alright?"

Everyone agreed, but Hyde stood up and followed Jackie. He caught up to her as she was walking home.

"C'mon Jacks I'll give you a ride home."

"No it's alright Steven, I like to walk now."

"Jackie. Jackie wait." Hyde stopped in front of her.

"Is this about the relationship thing? Because we need to talk about that."

"Steven look" She crossed her arms "I already told you I understand."

"But Jackie, I wasn't blowing us off, I just need time to think about it."

"It doesn't matter, whether you need time or not, we shouldn't happen anyway."

Hyde looked shocked, and extremely confused. "Wait, what? Why?"

"Because, you deserve better, better than me. I'm not good enough Steven. We already went over this, I'm just. I'm damaged goods, you know?"

Hyde looked appalled. "No Jackie, I don't know. And remember, I said you were too good for me. Jackie, whether or not you're good enough, is not the reason. I'm just….I'm scared okay? What's gonna happen to me? Will I get hurt, I mean you know, everyone has run out before, what's going to stop you in the future." Hyde looked down, embarrassed sort of before continuing on "You are the first person I've cared about in that way, I mean, I've never really even told a girl my feelings, because they've never been….because I've never had to deal with caring about someone before."

Jackie felt ashamed of herself, once again, always thinking of herself before others. She hugged Steven with all her might and pulled back slowly to look in his eyes "Steven, do you want to be with me? In a relationship, because we can take things slow, and I don't know, ummm I just want to be with you."

Hyde didn't need to answer, he leaned down and kissed her, passionately. Wrapping his arms around her petite waist, and her arms came around his neck, sinking her hands in to his hair. The two didn't separate for a long while, they had eachother. And at that moment that was good enough for them.

That Night: In the basement

That night, Jackie came around to the basement like she had promised, only to find that no one was there. Jackie looked around and went into the back room. Hyde was there of course, napping. Jackie had to let out a little 'awww' when she saw him. He was completely adorable when he slept.

Jackie slipped off her coat and climbed in with him. He let out a sigh and said "Hey you, you just get in."

"Yeah" was all she said. She snuggled into his chest while his arms came around to her back and waist. Both relishing in the alone time they could get, Hyde let a kiss fall her to forehead, before succumbing into sleep, lulled by her own easy, even breaths.

End Chapter 8

A/N: I know its been a while, but I had finals, then I had writers block. But that is over, Chapter 9 will focus on the stomach issue. And that probably wont be out until Saturday or Sunday. So bear with me. So thanks and please review.

Alexa