center b i Im an Auror, I didn't do it.

By Lightgoddess /i /b /center

"Madame Basher, I still don't see why this is necessary!" I say, as the Chief Investigator of my former fiancé's murder pulls me aside for questioning. "We work in the same department at the Ministry. I know the drill."

Madame Basher only smiles at me. We've been friends for a while now, being two of only ten ladies to make it into the Auror program and actually graduate. I chose to stay in the Dark Wizard Department while she went on to head Crime Scene Investigation. She's always been able to get things from people that no one else could. "Hermione, I still don't know why you are making such a big deal of this. You know the drill and you know that it's not nearly as painful as it appears. The only problem is that I've been told you actually saw Ronald yesterday, and besides that, you and he have been friends since you were eleven."

I huff and allow her to lead me into one of the smaller, sterile looking interrogation rooms. It's stark white with one table and two chairs, and a magical two-way mirror in the wall. I know what, or rather who, lies behind that mirror as I've been there before myself. "Fine," I say, "let's get this over with."

She smiles again and pours me a cup of tea, but doesn't pour herself one. She settles in her chair and pulls out her dictaquill and a parchment. "Now, as you said, you know the drill, we'll begin the questioning. State your full name, occupation, and a personal description of yourself."

"My name is Hermione Jane Granger. I am a Captain in the Dark Wizard Division of the Aurors in the Ministry of Magic. I am five feet six inches tall, approximately 115 pounds, with brown hair and eyes. I am thin and muscular. Is there anything else?"

"Any identifying marks? Tattoos, piercings, scars, moles?"

"I carry the magical mark of an Auror of my class, but as you know, that information is classified. I also have a nipple ring," I reply.

"Do you have any limitations that can not be overcome by magic?" she asks.

"None," I reply.

"Have you ever been suspected of committing any crime?"

I snort at this. "Would I be an Auror if I were, Madame?"

She sighs. "Hermione, drop the Madame bullshit. I'm just as much Boadicea right here, right now as I was yesterday before all of this happened. I just want to get this over with with you, because everyone knows that it takes a certain kind of person to be an auror, and you are that kind of person. It's just procedure. Now, when was the last time you saw the deceased?"

I roll my eyes at her again, but this time I grin. "All right, I'll drop the bullshit. The last time I saw him was yesterday. He was pissed off of his arse, propped up against the wall near the gateway to get into the Leaky Cauldron."

"Before that, when did you see him last?"

I pick up my teacup and raise it to my lips. I stop. I'm an Auror and know that one of the tactics used when interviewing suspects is to lace tea with Veritaserum. I wordlessly banish a sip and set the cup back on the small table lest the potion cause my tongue to begin to wag needlessly. "You know all about that, Boadicea."

She nods. "I do, but we need to make it part of the record."

"Well," I begin, "I suppose it was almost six weeks ago now that we broke up. I was interrupted one evening by Molly, Ron's mother, while I was reading. He was off only god knows where, and I was engrossed in the newest V.C. Andrews novel. So, she steps through the Floo and begins ranting and raving. She's screaming about 'cheating men' and 'bloody poufs'.

"Finally, I fix her a cup of tea laced with a strong calming draught and once she calms down, she forms coherent sentences and tells me everything. It appears that Ron was blackmailing one Severus Snape, trading his silence for favors of a sexual nature."

Boadicea looks up, clearly surprised. "Yes, Snape's gay. Anyway, so not only has he been cheating on me, but he's been cheating on me with a man. It's not like it's the first time, either, but I always overlooked it before. I couldn't this time, though. Snape gave me hell all through my school years. He's greasy, ugly, and mean, and I couldn't take that Ron wanted something like that over me.

"After Molly left, I went to his flat and waited for him. When he finally dragged himself home, he was so pissed that he couldn't walk. We had a big row, he tried to hex me, and then he tried to hit me. I knocked him out cold and after that; refused to speak with him. I was through with him."

"So," she asked, "you dumped him? How long were you together?"

"I'd do it again if he hadn't gotten himself murdered, Boadicea," I replied. "We were together for four years."

"I can't say that I'd blame you, Hermione," she replied with a sad smile. "So, what were you doing in the alley yesterday? Can anyone vouch for your presence there?"

I pick up my cup of tea again and banish another sip. It's cold anyway. "I'd come to Diagon Alley to get a couple of books for a case I'm working on. One was Obscure Poisons and Their Antidotes and the other was a book on the newest transfiguration techniques. I had to wait until late to come because I was working alone out in the field and couldn't get in before then, so, other than Millard, the junior Auror I was working with, no one else knew I was there. That's when I saw Ron, the fucking drunkard."

Boadicea gives me a knowing look, leans back, and steeples her fingers together, "Where does Blaise Zabini come into all of this, Hermione?"

"Other than being a fence straddler and the best shag of my life? I couldn't tell you."

"So you and he were lovers, then?"

I wordlessly banish the last of my tea and set the cup down the final time. "We shagged two nights before I broke it off with Ron. He does these wicked things with his tongue, Boadicea."

She scrunches her nose up and waves a hand. "That's not what we are here to discuss, though. What did you mean by he's a fence straddler?"

I laugh. She knows exactly what I mean. I did, after all, pick that phrase up from her. "He plays for both teams. He likes giving and receiving. Blaise is bisexual…and a home wrecking slut. As far as I know, he prefers those who are already in a relationship to those who aren't, and he'll shag anything that moves if it's got a hole."

"Well, Hermione, if you were in my position, who would you look at, yourself included?" Boadicea asks me.

"If I were leading the investigation, I would look at everyone, but I might look at Molly a little harder than some."

Throwing me a confused look, Boadicea asks, "Molly? His mother? Why?"

With a chuckle I reply, "Well, I can give you several reasons. One, she hates a queer. I remember her telling me one time that if she ever had any bloody queers in her family then they'd be as good as dead. Two, Ron was the fuck up. Think about it, the twins have millions now with the joke shop; Bill is married to that French bitch and they've got beautiful part Veela children; Charlie ended up marrying Tonks; no one knows where Percy is anymore, and Ginny is the first string seeker for the Canons. What's Ron doing? Barely scraping by and trying to work at Hogwarts. He's done nothing, and on top of it, he likes to be poled up the arse.

"If you ask me, Molly's going to be the one to look at. From my stance as an Auror, I'd say she has motive. She is the one who told me about the sexual favors. Now that I think about it, I hadn't talked to that overbearing bitch in years before she came to me about Ron being a pouf."

Boadicea simply nods at me. I've given her something to think about. "I think that's all, Hermione. I want you to stick around until we get through with the other interviews."

We walk back into Atrium from the small room. I'd not realized how cold I was in there until now. I shake her hand and walk toward the lift. "One more thing, Hermione, do you own a knife?"

Chuckling I answer, "You know I do. I have several standard issue knives from the Ministry, and you also know that they are registered with the department. You also know that I am more than capable of using them. If you need me, I will be in my cubicle finishing up some paperwork from this past week."

Walking away, I know that this investigation is going to take a lot of time and effort on her part and the part of her team to figure out just who killed Ron.

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