Besides, even more importantly, a Saturday meant a Quidditch game... and not just any Quidditch game, either. This was the last game of the school year, the one that would determine whether Gryffindor or Hufflepuff won the Quidditch Cup. Just what the Mediwizard ordered to get Sirius' mind off the whole poetry mess and allow him to work out his frustration. Remus and James were apparently just as glad of the relief; both of them were tucking into breakfast with more gusto than Sirius had seen in weeks.
All three were on the Gryffindor Quidditch team, as was Peter Pettigrew. James was both team captain and their Keeper, and ridiculously good at both jobs. Remus was a Chaser, Sirius a Beater, and short, lightweight Peter was the Seeker... and if they did say so themselves - which they did - they nearly made an unbeatable Quidditch machine with just the four of them.
"Morning, Sirius," said James, grabbing a cherry danish out of one of the bowls. "Ready to kick some Hufflepuff arse?"
"Never been readier," Sirius replied, grinning. "They don't stand a chance." Gryffindor had, after all, won the cup the last three years in a row. Nothing was going to break that streak now - not as long as the Marauders were still on the team.
James nodded. "Besides," he said, "you know there's nothing like a Quidditch victory to get girls. I bet we'll all have dates by the end of the day."
"Mmmmr," said Remus, through a mouthful of sausage. "Sirius, how's your hand?"
Sirius held it up to the light... it was almost back to normal, but still a bit glassy. He'd tested it that morning and found he could see the edge between the yellow and red squares on his scarf through it, but it took something with a very high contrast to get that effect. "Much better," he said.
"Good to hear," Remus nodded, then tilted his head in the direction of the Slytherin table. "Look - there're the triplets."
Sirius turned his head to look... yep, there were the triplets, all right, and to his disgust, all three had prepared for the game by donning Hufflepuff scarves and braideing black and yellow ribbons into their hair. Turncoats. He took a big bite of pancake and chewed it sullenly, his good mood considerably dampened. Hopefully, they were only doing it to be nice to Andy... after all, Ted Tonks was the Hufflepuff Keeper. They couldn't very well support Gryffindor when Andy's boyfriend was on the opposite team.
Yeah, that had to be it.
He glanced back again, and noticed that Andromeda Black's was not the only red head at the Slytherin table decked out in Hufflepuff colours... further down from her firey red-orange curls was a familiar head of thick auburn waves. What was Lily Evans doing at the Slytherin table?
Oh, of course. She was talking to Snivellus Snape.
Sirius had been pretending not to know Snape since both of them were very young. Snape had been an ugly, greasy little boy, and was growing up into an ugly, greasy little adult. He had stringy hair, a beak of a nose, and acne that Sirius could only liken to the pitted and oozing surface of one of Jupiter's moons. The Snapes were a pureblooded but poor and unimportant family. Sirius couldn't understand why Lily found the little slug worthy of her time and friendship, but there she was, laughing at something he'd said.
As Sirius watched, Snape knelt down in front of Lily and took her hands as if proposing marriage to her. He said something Sirius couldn't hear, and then Lily laughed out loud.
"Shakespeare?" she asked, her voice just loud enough to hear. "With a Hufflepuff?"
Sirius almost fell off his chair. He tried to calm himself... after all, he didn't know it was him that she was talking about...
And then she looked right at him. As did Snape.
Damn, damn, damn!
Sirius turned back to his breakfast, seething. He hadn't wanted anybody to know he was meeting Rosalie Cranmer... and now the whole school was going to hear about it! How in hell had Snivellus found out? When Sirius caught him, there was going to be great pain involved.
After breakfast, players and fans alike hurried off to get ready for the Quidditch game, and Sirius spotted Snape wandering off in the direction of the Slytherin dungeons. How exactly like him to go study or something similarly lame while the rest of the school did Quidditch. The nerd thought he was just so much better than everybody else, didn't he? Sirius followed him and grabbed him by the collar.
"Hey, Snivellus," he said.
"What do you want now?" Snape demanded.
Sirius pushed him against the wall - not hard enough to cause lasting damage, but hard enough to let Snape know he meant business. "What were you telling Evans?" he demanded.
"None of your business," said Snape defensively.
"Oh, really?" asked Sirius. "I think that if you're talking about me behind my back, then that MAKES it my business, doesn't it? What were you telling her, huh?"
"What do you care?" asked Snape.
"Because you were eavesdropping," said Sirius. "Didn't your Mummie ever tell you that it's not polite to listen in on other peoples' conversations?"
"I didn't," said Snape. "I went to Professor Duncan's office to ask her a question, and you were in the potions classroom. I didn't stop and listen or anything - I went through, went in, and came right back out and left again when I was done."
"And I didn't see you?" Sirius gave him a shake.
"You had your head in a cauldron," said Snape.
"What about Cranmer?" asked Sirius. "She didn't see you, either? What, do you have an invisibility charm or something, Snivellus?"
"Of course she saw me." Every time Sirius used the nickname the Marauders had given Snape, the boy was getting redder and redder from fury until the rest of his face nearly matched his acne. "I waved to her, and she waved to me, and I left."
"But she didn't say anything?" asked Sirius.
"Why would she?" asked Snape. "I didn't. Let me go."
Sirius snarled. Stupid Hufflepuff; she'd just let him walk right through? Hadn't he TOLD her he didn't want people to see him with her? Sirius was thoroughly glad he wouldn't be likely to see Rosalie again until Monday. It would give him time to cool down enough that he might not strangle her on sight.
But Snape was here right now. "Okay, Snivellus," Sirius began.
"Stop calling me that!" Snape wrenched his shirt out of Sirius' fingers and ducked under the taller boy's arm. "Will you grow up already?"
"Grow up?" Sirius could barely believe his ears. "You're telling me to grow up?"
"Yes," said Snape. "You still act exactly the same as you did when we were in our first year! Grow up! In fact, I'll help you." He pulled out his wand and pointed it at Sirius. "Tempus fugit!" he hollered.
Sirius abruptly grew an inch taller, gained fifty pounds, and sprouted a long beard as Snape's curse added about thirty-five years to his age. He snatched his own wand out of his robes and fired a returning curse. "Distendo!"
Snape began to expand as if putting on the weight of a hundred greasy suppers in a few minutes. His clothes stretched and tore, and within seconds he was so obese his face was no longer recognizable. He fumbled for his own wand with thickening fingers, and multiple chins wobbled as he opened his mouth to send another curse at Sirius...
And that's when Professor McGonagall found them.
"What do you two think you're doing?" she demanded.
Neither of them answered; they really didn't have to. It was perfectly obvious to anybody that they'd been duelling with curses, and unsupervised duelling was against school rules.
"Twenty points each from Gryffindor and Slytherin," said McGonagall, "and the only reason I don't suspend you from Quidditch, Mr. Black, is because this is the last game of the season and the team couldn't play without you. Now, both of you get to the hospital wing at once."
The curse had made Snape too fat to walk unaided, so in the end, McGonagall had to levitate him in order to get him upstairs. Madam Pomphrey de-aged and deflated the boys, then gave them a stern talking-to about the dangers of curses before sending them on their way. It was a remarkably light punishment for what they'd been caught doing, but Madam Pomphrey had been a Gryffindor when SHE was a student, and Sirius supposed she didn't want to see the game called off, either.
"I'll see you after the game," said Snape darkly, as they parted ways at the foot of the staircase; Sirius was headed for the pitch, Snape back to the dungeons.
"Oh, really?" asked Sirius.
"Yes," said Snape. "So I can finish hexing your egotistical head off."
Sirius smirked. "So you're challenging me to a proper duel, are you, Snivellus?"
"Stop calling me that," Snape repeated. "And yes, I am."
Sirius pursed his lips, began to answer, and then stopped as he got an absolutely wonderful idea. Oh, yes, he would snow Snivellus Snape what happened to unwashed miscreants who messed with the Marauders!
"Not after the game," he said. "McGonagall will be watching us. I'll tell you what: there's a secret passageway under the Whomping Willow out front. At the end of it, there's a room where we can duel without having to worry about teachers walking in on us. You get there by pressing the big knot in the willow roots with a stick; that'll make the tree stand still, but it only works on a full moon."
He tried to look as innocent as possible as Snape searched his face. For a moment, he wondered if even Snape was dumb enough to fall for it, but then he nodded.
"When's the next full moon?" asked Snape.
"Ohh..." Sirius pretended to have to think about it. "Five days from now. So - see you on Thursday, then?"
"All right," said Snape. "Thursday."