Well, howdy y'all! If the way I am writing this fic changes, I place all blame on Eoin Colfer himself. This is because the fourth book has just been released in the hellhole we call New Zealand. Don't forget my computer-generated army of brain-eating magic mushrooms. They're waitin' and they're gettin' hungry for some of them fingers from all those people that are writing nasty reviews squints at person reading this and trying to decide whether or not to send my mushrooms out anyway this chapter isn't really long. It's just extremely pointless. Enjoy :)
"Hmmm. I wonder what Butler's doing right now…"
"I don't know. Or care."
Meanwhile, with Butler…Standing outside the real bathroom door "Artemis, are you done yet? You've been in there an awfully long time."
Back to Artemis and Holly (personally, I think they're having a far more exciting time, but then that's just me and What Would I Know?)
"I'm bored."
"Really, Artemis?"
"Hey, YOU just called ME Artemis!"
"Did not."
"Did so."
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45 minutes later (isn't that a great amount of time? I seem to use it a lot.)
"Did not times infinity plus one!"
"…"
"…"
"Hey, I found a randomly placed mushroom patch. FOOD!"
"Wow, calm down, mud man. It's only mushrooms."
"Yeah, and I'm going to eat them." Chewing and slurpy eating noises emitted from Artemis's general direction
"Ewe. You are disgusting."
"I most certainly am not."
"You most certainly am are."
"I feel dizzy, Holly. Why do I feel dizzy?"
"Maybe it was the mushrooms. How many did you eat?"
after amoment of consideration "Lots."
"They didn't have a magical feeling about them, did they?"
"Yeah, they did. Why?"
"No reason. They were probably just Magic Mushrooms. Do you see any pretty colours?"
"Lots of pretty colours. Do YOU see the pretty colours, talking rainbow splodge?"
"No, Fowl. You're high."
"Hehehehe. Am not, oh colourful one!"
"Ok. You're not high. You're on Magic Mushroom Juice."
"AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
"Yes, Mud Man. Laugh at the colourful splodge."
"AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
"…"
Flings arms above head and starts preaching to the ceiling of the Janitors' closet "OH MIGHTYFUL COLOURS! COME DOWN AND SHARE YOUR PRETTINESS WITH THE WHOLE WORLD!"
"So this is what it looks like to see a high Mud Man. That's something I can now add to my list of 'Strange and Wonderful Things I Shall Probably Never See Again.'"
90 minutes later… (Oh the thrill, I've used a different time!)
"Holly, my head hurts. Why does my head hurt, Holly?"
"You ate some Magic Mushrooms, Fowl."
"No way! I'm not STUPID or anything. I'd NEVER do that."
"You did."
"Did not!"
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"I DID NOT!"
"You did so, times infinity."
"I did not times infinity plus one."
"This is getting boring. I want to play a new game."
Ominous beeping noise comes from nowhere in particular "What was that?"
"The ominous beeping noise that came from nowhere in particular?"
"Yes, that ominous beeping noise that came from nowhere in particular. What was it?"
"I don't know." Beeping noise happens again O,o
O,o "…"
"…"
Well, that's all I can think of right now! Don't forget to push the pretty 'go' button. It may take me a while before I next update. As I said, the fourth book is out and I'm not always the fastest of readers :)