Disclaimer: Nope....don't know any of them...considering they're not real.....oh and this is Eminem's song...Cleanin' Out My Closet, but my friend and I are obsessed with parodies...we think they're funny.
Cleanin' Out My Chamber....Harry Potter Style?
By Allison Joel and Leora Bernstein
Harry Potter and Ron Weasley, two sixth years at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizadry, were just sitting around ordinarily.
But Harry Potter was not an ordinary boy, and this was not an ordinary school.
Other than that...scar...on Harry's head that EVERYONE knows about already.....I mean, it just sticks out there! WHO WOULDN"T NOTICE THIS GIANT SCAR ON YOUR HEAD?!
Anyways, yeah, so Harry had a scar. So do millions of other stupid boys who try and be a power ranger...anyways, Harry was special for another reason.
Finally, after years of trying by older, more experienced wizards, Harry got to kill Voldemort.
It wasn't his fault, as usual. He got caught up in the fight between Voldemort and Dumbledore and sparks flew. Harry's magical scar worked for him once again as he got to do some cool jedi tricks and threw the ring back in the fire....oops, wrong story.
He threw Voldemort's WAND in the fire...and POOF, there goes the most terrible sorcerer of all time.
Who woulda known that all ya had ta do was take his magical piece of wood and chuck it into a fire?!
OK, so Harry and Ron were sitting around doing nothing.
They decide to explore the castle, because they were bored and looking for ways to get themselves killed again.
"Let's go to the dungeons." Ron suggested.
"Even I don't want to deal with Snape. The man's livid." Harry said, shaking his head.
"Well, I'm going. See ya." Ron said, leaving. Harry sighed and followed him.
*&*
Once they got to the dungeons, they saw a box type of thing.
Kind of like a jack-in-the-box.
"Hey, let's see what it is." Ron said, and all of a sudden, Voldemort himself popped out of it.
"Not again..." Harry groaned. He wsa majory tired of killing Voldemort over and over again.
"Ooh yes, young Potter, I'm back again!" Voldemort said.
"H-H-ar-ry...I don't like him..." Ron said, shaking. Voldemort had taken first place in Ron's mind over what scared him the most, and Harry had laughed many times over it. Not the fact that Voldemort was scary...I mean, even Harry was scared of the thing, alive or dead. But the fact the Ron's list went a little like this.
1) Voldemort
2) Spiders
3) Hermione on a hyper drive for homework
"So, what are you going to do this time?" Harry asked, tying to seem cool.
"Kill you. Avada Kredava!" Voldemort said, but his wand wouldn't work. "Dammit...wand, work!"
"Wait a minute....I know! You're a boggart!" Harry said.
"Aw...I had a song and everything. Do I still get to sing it?!" The dead boggart thing in front of them asked, pleading.
"Fine. Sing the stupid song." Harry sighed.
"Yay!" Voldemort yipped. And all of a sudden he turned all evil again...
Cleanin' Out My Chamber....Harry Potter Style?
By Allison Joel and Leora Bernstein
Where's my snake?
I can't find my snake!
Oh there you are...sssssss
Have you ever hated muggles and tried to kill them? I have.
I've cursed and slaughtered, even cruxified them.
My death signs for my evil times, look at the rhymes.
"Oh Voldemort don't kill Harry, I'll show you my behind!" Ha!
All this commotion 'cause I threw some stupid witch in the ocean
My tempers flaring, so I'll kill all the wizards off and keep going
I've done millions of cursed, do them long as I'm breathing
killin' lots in the morning and even more in the evening.
leaving with them dead in the den of their house
some tried to escape me, but they'll never get out!
Look at me now, I bet you're probably sick of me now
Ain't you Potter I'm a make you look so rediculous now!
I'm sorry Potter
I never meant to hurt you
I never meant to kill your dad
but tonight I'm cleaning out my chamber (2 times)
I got some skeletons in my closet
and everyone I know knows it
Once I throw a mudblood in a coffin and close it
I'll expose it, I'll take you back to 1953
Before I ever got beat up my a one year old baby
I was a grown up-for maybe just a couple of months
I saw my 'father', that got my whiteys up in a bunch
and I said "Hello, I thought you had died"
He said back "No my son, come and join the dark side"
I look at him, and I could picture saying godbye
And so I killed him, and then I started my life as Voldemort
and now I'm master of hate, I never make mistakes
But I'm not human, and I'm great enough to face it today
What you did was stupid, it was crazy you see
Did you really think that you could get away so safely
cause now, I'll kill you, Ron and Hermione too
It's my life, I'd like to welcome ya'll to Voldemort's loo
I'm sorry Potter
I never meant to hurt you
I never meant to kill your mum
But tonight I'm cleaning out my chamber (2 times)
I would never dis you just to get recognition
take a second to listen before you say I am dissin'
Put yourself in my position
Just try to envision
witnessin' Severus poppin' prescription pills in the kitchen
bitching that things are always missin' because he's really pmsing
goin through public housing systems, victim of Muggle born syndrome
my whole life I was made to believe I was muggle wen I wasnt
til I blew the cat up, it makes you sick to your stomach
doesnt it wasnt it the reason you abandoned me PA?!
so you could try to hide the fact that you married a witch, PA?!
but guess what? I'm gettin older now, and you're gettin all moldy
Ever since you were born, Potter, I knew you were phoney
And Basilisk's gettin so big now, you should see her, shes beautiful
HA! You'll see and then you'll be at your funeral
See what hurts me the most is you wont admit you are weak
Go on believing that you're stonger than me
But how dare you think you're Slytherin only cause you can hiss!
I hope you burn in wizards hell, right after this!
Myrtle told you how she died, and soon youre gonna see
Who killed Harry Potter?! ME!
I'm sorry Potter
I never meant to hurt you
I never meant to kill your dad
but tonight, I'm cleaning out my chamber (4 times)
"So, did ya like it??" Voldemort asked Harry once he was done.
"Uh....ridikkulus!" Harry and Ron said together blasting Voldemort into thin air.
As Ron and Harry were walking upstairs, you could hear Harry smaking Ron and saying "Man, next time...be afraid of someone who can actually rap!"
"I thought it was pretty catchy...I'm sorry Potter. I never meant to hurt you. I never meant to kill you dad, but tonight I'm cleaning out m-OW! Harry!"
**********************************************
tell me if ya liked it, could ya?! PLEASE?!
musicgal
Cleanin' Out My Chamber....Harry Potter Style?
By Allison Joel and Leora Bernstein
Harry Potter and Ron Weasley, two sixth years at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizadry, were just sitting around ordinarily.
But Harry Potter was not an ordinary boy, and this was not an ordinary school.
Other than that...scar...on Harry's head that EVERYONE knows about already.....I mean, it just sticks out there! WHO WOULDN"T NOTICE THIS GIANT SCAR ON YOUR HEAD?!
Anyways, yeah, so Harry had a scar. So do millions of other stupid boys who try and be a power ranger...anyways, Harry was special for another reason.
Finally, after years of trying by older, more experienced wizards, Harry got to kill Voldemort.
It wasn't his fault, as usual. He got caught up in the fight between Voldemort and Dumbledore and sparks flew. Harry's magical scar worked for him once again as he got to do some cool jedi tricks and threw the ring back in the fire....oops, wrong story.
He threw Voldemort's WAND in the fire...and POOF, there goes the most terrible sorcerer of all time.
Who woulda known that all ya had ta do was take his magical piece of wood and chuck it into a fire?!
OK, so Harry and Ron were sitting around doing nothing.
They decide to explore the castle, because they were bored and looking for ways to get themselves killed again.
"Let's go to the dungeons." Ron suggested.
"Even I don't want to deal with Snape. The man's livid." Harry said, shaking his head.
"Well, I'm going. See ya." Ron said, leaving. Harry sighed and followed him.
*&*
Once they got to the dungeons, they saw a box type of thing.
Kind of like a jack-in-the-box.
"Hey, let's see what it is." Ron said, and all of a sudden, Voldemort himself popped out of it.
"Not again..." Harry groaned. He wsa majory tired of killing Voldemort over and over again.
"Ooh yes, young Potter, I'm back again!" Voldemort said.
"H-H-ar-ry...I don't like him..." Ron said, shaking. Voldemort had taken first place in Ron's mind over what scared him the most, and Harry had laughed many times over it. Not the fact that Voldemort was scary...I mean, even Harry was scared of the thing, alive or dead. But the fact the Ron's list went a little like this.
1) Voldemort
2) Spiders
3) Hermione on a hyper drive for homework
"So, what are you going to do this time?" Harry asked, tying to seem cool.
"Kill you. Avada Kredava!" Voldemort said, but his wand wouldn't work. "Dammit...wand, work!"
"Wait a minute....I know! You're a boggart!" Harry said.
"Aw...I had a song and everything. Do I still get to sing it?!" The dead boggart thing in front of them asked, pleading.
"Fine. Sing the stupid song." Harry sighed.
"Yay!" Voldemort yipped. And all of a sudden he turned all evil again...
Cleanin' Out My Chamber....Harry Potter Style?
By Allison Joel and Leora Bernstein
Where's my snake?
I can't find my snake!
Oh there you are...sssssss
Have you ever hated muggles and tried to kill them? I have.
I've cursed and slaughtered, even cruxified them.
My death signs for my evil times, look at the rhymes.
"Oh Voldemort don't kill Harry, I'll show you my behind!" Ha!
All this commotion 'cause I threw some stupid witch in the ocean
My tempers flaring, so I'll kill all the wizards off and keep going
I've done millions of cursed, do them long as I'm breathing
killin' lots in the morning and even more in the evening.
leaving with them dead in the den of their house
some tried to escape me, but they'll never get out!
Look at me now, I bet you're probably sick of me now
Ain't you Potter I'm a make you look so rediculous now!
I'm sorry Potter
I never meant to hurt you
I never meant to kill your dad
but tonight I'm cleaning out my chamber (2 times)
I got some skeletons in my closet
and everyone I know knows it
Once I throw a mudblood in a coffin and close it
I'll expose it, I'll take you back to 1953
Before I ever got beat up my a one year old baby
I was a grown up-for maybe just a couple of months
I saw my 'father', that got my whiteys up in a bunch
and I said "Hello, I thought you had died"
He said back "No my son, come and join the dark side"
I look at him, and I could picture saying godbye
And so I killed him, and then I started my life as Voldemort
and now I'm master of hate, I never make mistakes
But I'm not human, and I'm great enough to face it today
What you did was stupid, it was crazy you see
Did you really think that you could get away so safely
cause now, I'll kill you, Ron and Hermione too
It's my life, I'd like to welcome ya'll to Voldemort's loo
I'm sorry Potter
I never meant to hurt you
I never meant to kill your mum
But tonight I'm cleaning out my chamber (2 times)
I would never dis you just to get recognition
take a second to listen before you say I am dissin'
Put yourself in my position
Just try to envision
witnessin' Severus poppin' prescription pills in the kitchen
bitching that things are always missin' because he's really pmsing
goin through public housing systems, victim of Muggle born syndrome
my whole life I was made to believe I was muggle wen I wasnt
til I blew the cat up, it makes you sick to your stomach
doesnt it wasnt it the reason you abandoned me PA?!
so you could try to hide the fact that you married a witch, PA?!
but guess what? I'm gettin older now, and you're gettin all moldy
Ever since you were born, Potter, I knew you were phoney
And Basilisk's gettin so big now, you should see her, shes beautiful
HA! You'll see and then you'll be at your funeral
See what hurts me the most is you wont admit you are weak
Go on believing that you're stonger than me
But how dare you think you're Slytherin only cause you can hiss!
I hope you burn in wizards hell, right after this!
Myrtle told you how she died, and soon youre gonna see
Who killed Harry Potter?! ME!
I'm sorry Potter
I never meant to hurt you
I never meant to kill your dad
but tonight, I'm cleaning out my chamber (4 times)
"So, did ya like it??" Voldemort asked Harry once he was done.
"Uh....ridikkulus!" Harry and Ron said together blasting Voldemort into thin air.
As Ron and Harry were walking upstairs, you could hear Harry smaking Ron and saying "Man, next time...be afraid of someone who can actually rap!"
"I thought it was pretty catchy...I'm sorry Potter. I never meant to hurt you. I never meant to kill you dad, but tonight I'm cleaning out m-OW! Harry!"
**********************************************
tell me if ya liked it, could ya?! PLEASE?!
musicgal