Don't Let Go

Chapter 10

Haley James had never liked hospitals. As a young girl she had watched her grandmother die slowly from cancer in a cold and unfamiliar hospital room. As a woman so full of life and joy, she had grown to despise the place where people lost their hope as they watched their loved ones slip away. But not even her dislike of hospitals could keep her away from supporting two of the most important people in her life, and now she had Emily to add to that list. Her family needed her and she wasn't going anywhere.

Haley waited outside of Peyton's room until a nurse finished checking her vitals before entering the dark room quietly. She felt sad as she looked at Peyton who appeared to just be sleeping rather than lying unconscious in a hospital bed. Haley refused to shed the tears that were threatening to fall just then, even though her friend wouldn't be able to see her cry it was important to Haley that she remain optimistic amidst the sadness. She had to be strong for Lucas, and for Peyton.

"Only you could still have perfect hair in this situation." Haley remarked candidly as she looked at Peyton's blonde curls fanned over her hospital pillow. Taking residence in the plastic hospital chair, Haley sat quietly for a few moments trying to gather her thoughts.

"You gave me a hell of a scare this morning. I come over to have breakfast with my best friend and end up with a medical emergency on my hands. And let me be totally honest with you Peyton, I may have appeared to have been the embodiment of calm but I was dying inside. I was so scared seeing you coming out of the bedroom holding your stomach like that, the look on your face made my heart drop. But I'm telling you now that you're going to be ok, I will personally make sure of that."

Haley didn't want to focus anymore on Peyton being sick. "So you'll never guess who I ran into at the mall the other day, Brooke. She was on her lunch break or something. I'm surprised she even came over to say hello. She was asking questions about you and trying to act like she didn't care about the answers. I don't know if she's still angry with you or if she's just jealous. She was asking about the baby and when you and Lucas had gotten married, stuff like that. I've never been Brooke's biggest fan but maybe you should talk to her when you get better."

"Lucas went down to sit with Emily for a little while. You should see the way his face lights up when he talks about her Peyton. He's a natural at this daddy thing already, granted he hasn't had to change a dirty diaper yet or anything. And I know you were scared before about not knowing if you were going to be a good mom, but I know you'll be great at it."

"Hey I ran into someone else we went to high school with, you remember Michael Buck? He was that awkward-looking kid during senior year who didn't have all that many friends, but he had a serious crush on you. And when he worked up the courage to ask you to the senior sweetheart dance. You were already going with Lucas, but you saw the hope in that kid's eyes and you immediately accepted his invitation. Lucas understood and being the cocky boy that he was he already knew he'd have you for the rest of his life so he didn't mind that you were going to the dance with someone else. Anyway I ran into Michael the other day at the grocery store, he's definitely grown into his face. He's married now and has two kids, and because you are apparently the most popular girl who has ever left Tree Hill he asked how you were. I told him about you and Lucas and that you had a baby on the way, he wished you luck. He also told me that going to the dance with you was his best memory of high school. And it's because of that big heart you had in high school and still do now that I know you will make a great mom." Haley reached out and grabbed onto Peyton's hand and held it tight.

Downstairs, Lucas had resumed his position in the chair next to Emily's incubator. He wanted so badly to be able to lay a hand gently on her back and feel her breathing, he wanted to know she was really his, to know that it was all real. But he was content with just being near her for the time being. The nurses had told him that since he couldn't physically bond with her like most new parents, he'd have to bond with her using his voice. And so he talked about the one thing he loved more than anything, Peyton.

"Your mom and I were, what your Aunt Haley likes to call high-school sweethearts. We were ridiculously happy, more happy than any two teenagers in high school should have been. We had been dating for two years before we went off to college, together of course. Your mom studied art and I studied journalism. Your mom always used to tell me that she never wanted to get married, that it just wasn't her thing. But that didn't stop me from asking her a few dozen times and she turned me down on all of those attempts."

"I don't know what changed but we had dinner one night in our apartment and we were dancing around in the living room acting like kids. It was a good night and Peyton was smiling. I was singing along to some Eric Clapton song on the radio as we were dancing and when it was over I said, "Marry me." And she said finally said yes."

"Your mom wanted to get married someplace small with only a few people at the ceremony. I didn't care either way I just wanted to marry her. We found this little white church near school. My mom and Uncle Keith and Nathan and Haley all came down, we didn't have enough people there to fill an entire pew but those were the people that mattered most to us. You should have seen your mom she looked beautiful. When I first caught a glimpse of her walking down the aisle she took my breath away, and I mean that literally, I couldn't breath when I saw her. Your mom was never one for anything extravagant so her dress was simple, none of that beading or lace that you see on everyone else."

"My hands shook through the entire ceremony. I don't know I was so nervous, because right up until you were born that had been the greatest day of my life. And that was all almost seven years ago. We planned on having kids after a few years of being married but we got a little selfish worrying about our jobs and ourselves, plus we were living in this one bedroom apartment and that was no place for kids. You need a big backyard to play in and your own bedroom, and that was one of the reasons we moved back to Tree Hill when your mom and I found out we were going to have you. When you get older maybe I can teach you how to play basketball like your Uncle Nathan and I did, I'll take you down to the River Court and show you everything the old man knows."

"Mr. Scott?" Lucas was surprised to hear another voice after having spent so much time talking to someone who couldn't talk back. He turned to see the nurse who had been helping him earlier.

"Yes?"

"I'm just letting you know that visiting hours in the NICU are almost over. You have a few minutes left tonight and then tomorrow morning at 9:00 you can come back."

"Ok, thank you." Lucas said looking at his watch, an anniversary gift from Peyton. It was almost 8:00. He hadn't been paying much attention to the time and was surprised by how much time had passed.

He leaned in to whisper goodbye to Emily for the last time that night. "I have to go now Emily, but I'll be back first thing tomorrow morning. I'll be waiting outside with my nose pressed against the glass until the nurses let me in. I love you sweetheart."

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