Disclaimer: I do not own anything from Yugioh…and I don't own and beer names…or Barney, or the Spanish language…or Ecuador

A/N: YEA! Another story! BUT THIS IS SORTA PERVERTED! Bwahahahaha…I got this idea while I was thinking of something…random…yea….that's it…well I hope everyone enjoys the story! Oh yeah, if you are from Ecuador or you are Mexican I am terribly sorry…I don't mean any offense!

Have you ever had a first kiss? Well, for many people a first kiss is something so great that they would never forget. Many people want their first kiss to be with a great person, or a hot guy/girl, or a famous dude. But unfortunately some people don't have such great first kisses in their life. And they can't go back in time to change them. So I am here to tell their stories…

First Kisses

Victim 1: Alister

It was a cold winter's night. There was a blizzard said to come in exactly 17 minutes. Everyone evacuated the ghetto streets and ran into pubs, apartments, and boxes in the alley ways. Alister ran down the frosty street and into the warm pub. He took off his trench coat and gave it to a slutty coat collector girl. Surprisingly he was wearing his lavender belly shirt/tank top/sports bra looking shirt this chilly night. Alister approached the bar and ordered, "Hey! Can I get a Budweiser over here?"

"Sure kid. I'll need to see your ID." The waiter tapped his foot impatiently. Alister suddenly remembered that the age to drink was 21 and he was only 17.

"Uhh can I get a root beer instead?"

"We're out of root beer."

"You got anything that doesn't have alcohol?" the waiter thought for a while.

"Pink lemonade."

"No soda?"

"No. its pink lemonade or nothing kid." Make your choice fast! I got a full house tonight because of this damn blizzard."

"Are you sure you don't have any yellow lemonade?"

"Yeah. In the bathroom. People don't like to flush here for some reason."

"Fine, pink lemonade." Alister grumbled. He wasn't having a good day. First he had a draw with Seto Kaiba. Then Dartz yelled at him for losing Kaiba's soul. And then Valon teased him again because of his feminine appearance. He had 7 guys whistle at him, and Rafael nearly knocked him out when they were disagreeing that the ending to the Barney song was 'won't you say you love me too?' instead of 'won't you say we love you too?'. Just then a big fat rich guy came into the pub. He looked around and did a double take on Alister. Ai Curumba! Look at that atractivo little lady! The fat man placed himself on the stool next to Alister.

"Hello! I am Eduardo! I'm am rich, and I am from Ecuador! Would you introduce yourself to me?" Eduardo's eyes glittered furiously. Alister stared in confusion at the fat man who so suddenly introduced himself. I should play it safe Alister thought.

"I'm…Chandler. I'm not so rich and my family is dead." Alister spoke cautiously.

Eduardo burst into tears when he heard that lovely "Chandler's" family was all deceased.

"That is too terrible!" and Alister was thrust into a gut squeezing hug. Eduardo kept repeating over and over, "Everything will be alright! Everything will be alright!"

Alister was incredibly grateful when the waiter finally delivered his pink lemonade.

"Kid. Your lemonade."

"Thanks." Alister mumbled as he stared at the pink substance in a glass topped off with crushed ice, a cherry, pineapples and a paper umbrella. Eduardo also looked at the tropical drink. He like it so he ordered one for himself too. Alister sipped his lemonade and tried to avoid contact with Eduardo, but Eduardo kept asking him questions about school, home and what he wore everyday. Alister started off answering the questions with false answers but after his 3rd glass of pink lemonade that Eduardo bought for him, he felt all bubbly and light and he giggled a lot.

"So what do you wear everyday?"

"Well, hic, I wear this," Alister pulled his belly shirt forward and let it go, snapping him. "And I wear a trench coat and, hic, boots and a Chaos Duel disk. It's all green and, hic, shiny!"

"NO PANTIES!" Eduardo screeched pervertedly.

"Hic! I wear pants," he pointed at his leather pants, "But nothing underneath besides underwear. Hee hee hee! Hic!" Alister giggled.

"OH MY!" Eduardo leaned in closer. "Would you like another pink lemonade?"

"Hic! Sure!" Alister hiccupped. He never felt this great in his whole entire life. It was like he had no problems in his life and he didn't have to do anything. He could sit, relax and drink pink lemonade forever. But it was making him a little dizzy. Eduardo presented Alister his 4th pink lemonade. Before Alister picked it up, Eduardo thought he got Alister drunk enough so he frenched Alister. It was a life sucking kiss and I won't say anymore. Alister finally came back to reality and slapped Eduardo. Then he puked on him.

After that Eduardo found out that Alister was a GUY the 'hard way". While he got his suit dry cleaned, he died from his STD he got from all the "fun" in his life.

A/N: ODION IS NEXT! And this is the only perverted one! The others may perverted but this is the most perverted…I'm sorry. Pleez review! And go away if you're going to flame.