Chapter 20: The Mishap
SEPTEMBER 21, 1980
NEWPORT BEACH, CA
It had been two days, but things didn't feel any better to Kirsten. She was lying on her large bed, curled up in the corner, snuggling against her pillows, while tears were falling down her face from her sapphire eyes. She didn't think it would be this hard. How could she have known? But despite these feelings, she still felt that she had made the right decision.
It was the right decision, she thought. Who was she kidding…there was no option in this situation…well, there were options, but none of them seemed viable in this instance, except one…therefore there was really no decision. But this logic somehow didn't make it any easier. She thought back to a week ago when this whole thing started…
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SEPTEMBER 14, 1980
NEWPORT BEACH, CA
Kirsten awoke with a start. Her stomach was doing flip-flops and she knew in an instant that anything that was currently in it was going to make its way up her esophagus. She jumped out of bed and rushed into the bathroom, burying her head in the toilet.
After her body had finished emptying her stomach of last night's dinner, Kirsten sighed. It was the third morning in the last four days that she had thrown up the moment she woke up. The first time this happened, she contributed it to food poisoning…maybe some bad meat or something. But after the third time, she was beginning to doubt that theory.
Flu, maybe, she thought, but she knew that it probably wasn't that. After all, she felt fine the rest of the day…no fever and no more vomiting.
Kirsten sat on the floor with her back against the bathroom cabinet and really started to think about what this mysterious illness could be. Then suddenly, it hit her like a ton of bricks.
No! she thought. It couldn't be…I can't be, could I? As she started thinking about it, with a million thoughts rushing through her head at once, she realized something else. I'm late. Like by over a week. Oh, my God! I'm never that late.
Kirsten buried her head into her lap. This can't be happening. I thought we were careful. I'm seventeen…this is not suppose to happen. I'm not supposed to be…be…shit, I can't even say it. Hell, I can't even think it.
"Pregnant," she finally whispered out loud.
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Kirsten started crying a little harder as she pictured the image of her sitting alone on her bathroom floor when she first realized she was pregnant. She was so scared, and yet she couldn't tell anyone. How did one tell anyone something like this? But this was nothing compared her visit to the clinic she had gone to only two days ago…
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SEPTEMBER 19, 1980
RIVERSIDE, CA
Kirsten was sitting in the waiting room of a medical clinic in Riverside doing just what the title of the room was- waiting. It was a Friday afternoon and she had driven here as soon as school let out for the day. She knew that her parents would be gone this afternoon, with her father at work and her mother taking Hailey to dance class and then to gymnastics class, so they wouldn't miss her. She had come to the conclusion that she had to go somewhere far away…she couldn't risk someone she knew finding out about this.
The day after she had come to the realization that she might be pregnant, she went to a drug store in the next city over to buy a home pregnancy test. She made sure that no one was home when she performed the test. And upon viewing the results, her fears were now a reality. The stick turned pink. She was pregnant.
She had already filled out all the medical forms…with the name of Nicole Christian…the same name that was on her fake driver's license that she usually used for purposes of buying alcohol. I guess it came in handy in more ways than one, she thought bitterly. She knew that if a girl was under 18 years old, she needed parental consent to get the abortion. But getting parental consent was out of the question. Her parents could never find out. If her dad knew, he would probably kick her out of the house right now…if her mom knew, she'd probably drink even more. And for that matter no one else could find out…not Kelly, and certainly not Jimmy. Kirsten knew he would freak if he found out…it was better this way. And this was the other plus of using a fake name- Kirsten didn't want there to be any record of her doing what she was about to do.
"Nicole Christian," the nurse called out.
However, Kirsten didn't hear her. Partially because she was so wrapped up in her thoughts, and partially because the fake name didn't grab her attention.
The nurse approached Kirsten and said, "Nicole, right? You're next."
Kirsten snapped out of her daze, and said, "Oh, right…sorry."
"It's all right. Right this way," the nurse said and started walking toward the exam room. Kirsten followed closely behind. The nurse took Kirsten's vitals, then gave her a gown to change into and left her in the room alone. Kirsten changed into it and then sat uncomfortably on the exam table. She peered around at her surroundings. The room was blank. Very white and sterile looking. Almost cold. She involuntarily shivered at the thought.
When the doctor entered the room, he greeted Kirsten, but all she could do was nod. He began the procedure and then when she heard the low hum of the vacuum that was taking the fetus from inside her, she almost broke down. But she bit her lip and refused to cry there…in that clinic…in front of that doctor. It was the right thing to do, she kept telling herself.
The procedure was short…it almost surprised Kirsten…less than ten minutes. When the doctor was finished, he left her alone to change. Before Kirsten left the clinic, she paid at the front in cash. She had lied and said she didn't have insurance. After all, if she claimed this on insurance, her father would find out for sure.
As soon as Kirsten left the building, the tears that she had been holding in for so long began to fall. She sat in her convertible for ten minutes, trying desperately to compose herself so she could drive home. Finally, her sobs subsided and only occasionally were a few tears dripping down. She put on her sunglasses to hide her red and puffy eyes and at least some of her tears, and she turned on her car and drove away, hoping never to return there again.
As soon as Kirsten was leaving the clinic in Riverside, a young red headed girl ventured into the front yard of her house in a nearby neighborhood. Her friend from across the street was coming over any minute to join her, and the two of them were walking to the ice cream shop two blocks away. The young girl heard the sound of a car in the distance, and she looked up and saw a brand-new, bright red Beetle convertible being driven by a gorgeous blonde girl wearing the latest style of sunglasses. As the car past her, the young girl continued to watch the girl in the car, even as it moved further and further away…until it got to the point that she could she could no longer see the bright red paint.
Wow, the girl thought. I wish I could be rich like that girl. I bet her life is just great. Perfect even. Little did the girl know where this blonde girl had just come from.
"Hello, earth to Julie!" called another girl. Julie snapped back to reality as soon as she heard the voice. "Ready for ice cream?"
"Um, yeah," Julie said. "Come on, let's go."
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Kirsten muffled her intense sobbing with a pillow. Eventually it subsided and she moved herself to her window seat, staring off into the view of her street with her red, puffy eyes. She glanced over at the phone that was ringing in her room. Her own private phone line. However, she made no move to get up and get it. She knew who it was and she didn't want to talk to him right now. She knew it wasn't his fault. After all, it took two to tango. But she just couldn't face him. She knew if she saw him right now, she would have to put on a big, happy front, despite the fact that she was suffering inside, and at the moment she didn't feel up to it. She would have to do that tomorrow for school, and she felt content to let her emotions out for now.
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In the Season 1 Season Finale ("The Tie that Binds"), Kirsten has lunch with Theresa after she visits the doctor about having an abortion. Kirsten tells her that she doesn't have to make the decision that makes the most sense. Then Theresa says that nothing like this would ever happen to someone like Kirsten. Then Kirsten gives her a look like "Yes, I do know," and then says that she doesn't regret the decision she made, but that she wished she could have had someone there for her when she was trying to choose. Then later, Sandy accuses her of talking Theresa out of the abortion. He then says something like, ' do you have any idea what Ryan is going through.' And then Kirsten replies, 'Not as well as I know what she's going through.' Sandy asks her what that means (obviously had no idea) and Kirsten covers and says Theresa is scared.
From these scenes, it alluded to Kirsten having an abortion. I am assuming it was when she was younger and when she was with Jimmy, but no one knows about it. Maybe it wasn't with Jimmy…that was just a guess on my part. I'm really curious if the show is going to revisit this topic.