Me: I'm starting a new one, yes, the other ones are in progress...it's just that the chapters are too lame to post. I'm working on it. Don't worry. It's just, school is turning my brain to mush. 8th GRADERS ARE NOT MEANT TO BE TAKING ALGEBRA I! I WILL NOT SUCCUMB TO THE SCHOOL'S ADMINISTRATION! THEY SHALL NOT HOLD ME DOWN!

Hiei: Onna, you're strange.

Me: THAT WAS UNCALLED FOR! (smacks Hiei) Sorry Hiei lovers. Here, he wants you to kiss the booboo.

Hiei: O.O WHAT! NO! STAY AWAY! (runs away from rabid fangirls)

Me: And for those of you who don't care about Hiei...RUN MARIK RUN!

Marik: OH NO! (to Malik) RUN MY PATHETIC OTHER BEING! RUN! (runs away from fangirls, and particularly, Jade)

Me: I don't own Yu-Yu-Hakusho. It belongs to Yoshihiro Togashi the literary genius. WHY CAN'T I COME UP WITH SOMETHING LIKE THIS! To Mr. Togashi, if you ever read this: Just so you know, I practically worship your work...especially Kurama. And sometimes, when I wake up, I feel like punching Kuwabara for some reason...hmmmm, maybe I'm a sufferer of Asperger's Syndrome...or not, oh well. (shrugs) JUST ANOTHER WAY THAT THE MAN IS KEEPING ME DOWN! (smiles) And now, without further delay, on with the show/story!

Chapter 1: Random Happenings

My POV

I was just sitting in Koenma's big chair thingie, spinning around, and around, and around, and around, and around, and around, and around, and around, and around, and around, and around, and around, and around, and around, and around, and around, and around, and around, and around, and around, and around, and around, and around, and around, and around, and around, and around, and around, and around, and around, and around, and around, and around, and around, and around, and around, and...woah, I'm making myself dizzy. Anyways, the toddler(but totally hot in his teenager form) was checking to make sure I don't have Asperger's Syndrome, which I'm not so sure that I do...but maybe I do...it's just one of the mysteries of life that we're better off not knowing because we're too lame to figure it out. Damn! Anyways, I was sitting there thinking up new plots to get Hiei pissed at me, cause it's totally funny when he is and it's fun to run away from him in terror, when the door bursts down. Yuske and the gang walk in and the door magically heals itself. It was always a goal of mine to figure out how it does that. I mentally added that to my list of goals, as follows:

1. Figure out how to get Sesshomaru to marry me.

2. Figure out if it hurts Hiei when you poke him in the Jagan eye.

3. Figure out if Ryushi Nagami, along with Seishira, you peeps don't know him, is a gay

4. Figure out if Britney Spears had plastic surgery

5. Figure out just how Ariel got herself hooked onto wrestling

6. Figure out Jade and Sarra's mind. (That will take forever)

7. Actually write a lemon (Yeah right, I can't even write a fluff scene without making tomatoes jealous)

8. Try to wipe that 'Jr.' off of Koenma's head

9. Gag and tie up Youko and lock him in my closet

10. Figure out how door to Koenma's office magically repairs itself

11. Actually pass Algebra I

12. Find out why I love Lifetime Movie Channel for Women so much

13. Tell some random little kid that he's gonna die tomorrow. Mean, I know, but totally funny. Tried it on Kurama's little bro, nearly got killed afterwards. Those thorns are sharp!

14. Capture Ed from Full Metal Alchemist and add him to my Bishie shrine.

15. Figure out MY mind, let alone others

As I was rattling off these goals in my head, Yuske was trying to ask me something. I totally was not paying attention, but just not to hurt his feelings, I answered him.

"Yuske, whatever it is, just sign it, cancel it, or order five more."

"I asked you what your favorite color is." Well that was random. Which is so the pot calling the kettle black, I know. But it was. Especially since I told him five million times it was red. Men, you know, you could tell them that your favorite fictional character is Buffy the Vampire Slayer and the next day, they think it's Dante from Devil May Cry 1-3, though you have no idea who he is. Men, you can't live with them...you can't...nope, that's all.

"It's red Yuske."

"Really, I thought it was black."

"I said that my favorite color combo was RED and BLACK Yuske." I pick up Koenma's chair and start wacking him with it. "PAY ATTENTION TO DETAILS!"

"Nikki-kun, if you must abuse Yuske, please don't do it with my chair. What did it do to you?"

"It's spinny."

"So?"

"We all know that penguins are spinny! FEAR THE PENGUINS!" I finally succeed in smashing the chair in half. Except on Hiei, not Yuske.

(-.-) (Hiei) "Woman." He started to growl. Yes, GROWL! Like those hairless poodles you see old ladies walking in the park. I fear those too.

"Wow, I actually succeeded in my daily goal of ticking you off...YAY ME !" I start jumping up and down in a circle.

"So it's her goal to get herself almost killed every day?" Yuske asks, on the floor with a bunch of anime bumps. Kurama just sighs.

"She needs to get better goals." Kuwabara says.

Inside Hiei's Mind...

Must...Restrain...Self...From Killing...Woman. Aww, the heck with it.

In My Mind (again)

(Reminding you folks that it's like, 7:20 in the morning, and the bus comes in 25 minutes, and I have yet to brush my teeth, let alone put on my foundation and do my hair up in it's usual pony tail) I saw Hiei unsheathe his katana and like any sane person I know, which isn't really a lot, I ran. I ran like my life depended on it, cause really, it did. So everyone was watching me run until I smack into a wall and Hiei screeches into a halt beside me.

"Onna, are you alright?"

"I will be. Hiei," I say, peeling myself off the wall with those anime swirly eyes

"What?"

"Do me a favor?" I start to stumble a bit.

"Hn, what?"

"Make sure my skirt doesn't fall up over my head. M kay?" and then I pass out.

When I come to, I see everybody looming over me.

"What are you guys looking at? Did I sprout two heads?"

"Yes." Kuwabara says. I start to scream.

"He was only kidding Nikki." Yuske gives me a reassuring pat on the back.

"I know, I was just screaming at the sight of his ugliness." I state back. This causes Yuske to go into a fit of giggles. I run away singing my version of "When You Wish Upon A Star"

"When you wish upon a fish, wish for a real nice dish, when you wish upon a fish...VOLLEYBALL!" And thus, I rest my case. Psssst...Jerry, end chapter here.

Me: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! Yaaaaaaay! (does a little jig)

Hiei: Woman, I loathe you.

Me: I know. (Smiles an adorable smile)

Kurama: Please review.