What I Really Meant to Say – Sirius
Lyrics in italics, What Sirius was thinking right before, and as he fell through the veil?
It took me by surprise, when I saw you standing there, close enough to touch, breathing the same air…
Sirius was locked in a horrible battle with Bellatrix Lestrange, his own flesh and blood, not that that counted in the black family, and Sirius hated to admit it, but she was a fighter. Sirius took a second to glance over at his lover, locked in his own duel, he looked so hot fighting. Sirius snapped back and blocked a shot giving Bellatrix his, 'is that all you got' smile.
You asked me how I'd been, I guess that's when I smiled and said just fine, oh but baby I was lying…
Sirius was not expecting what was coming next, as he again stole a glance at his partner he felt this horrible pain in his heart and he heard Bellatrix Laughing at him, he could feel himself falling, he let her get him. What was happening, where was Remus, he couldn't die, Remus and Harry needed him. "SIRIUS!" That was Harry; he knew it was bad if he could hear Harry screaming for him. He could briefly see Remus holding Harry back, protecting him like he always did. 'I'm so sorry Harry. I am so sorry Remus" Sirius thought as his long fall to the veil was happening. 'It's not fair I leave either of you."
What I really meant to say, is I'm dying here inside and I miss you more each day, there's not a night I haven't cried, and baby here's the truth, I'm still in love with you, yea, that's what I really meant to say…
'I love you Remus, there's nothing in this world that can ever change that, and nothing that can ever will. Please don't be sad for me, go on and live your life as wildly as you would have with me. Watch over Harry and Love him, be the Moony you have always been, and remember above all I love you.
And as you walked away, the echo of my words cut just like a knife, cut so deep it hurts…
Sirius heart fell, he would never see Remus again, never feel his touch, never be with him, last night was the last time they would ever be together like that, last night was the last time they would share a kiss. How stupid was he for leaving Remus for thirteen years to be in Azkaban.
I held back the tears, held onto my pride and watched you go, I wonder if you'll ever know…
As Sirius finished falling he could feel his heart stop and his world go black, 'will you ever know how much I love you Moony? I was such a jerk to you, I left you when you needed me most, and I left Harry. Sirius reflected one last time on their last night together. Twelve hours ago he would have never pictured himself dying, not like this, not leaving behind the two most important people in his life.
What I really meant to say, is I'm dying here inside and I miss you more each day, there's not a night I haven't cried, and baby here's the truth, I'm still in love with you. What I really meant to say, is I'm really not that strong, no matter how I try, I'm still holding on. And here's the honest truth, I'm still in love with you, yea, that's what I really meant to say, that's what I really meant to say, that's what I really meant to say…
As the veil ruffled, having just let the body of one, Sirius Black pass through it, Remus could have swear he heard Sirius say "I love you Moony, remember, its not your fault." The weird thing is, Harry heard him too, though he could have sworn Sirius said it wasn't his fault. Maybe that was what Sirius really meant to say, it's not their fault.
A/N: There you go...I finished both of them, so this is it for this 2 chapter story. If you want more stories about Sirius and Remus check out A Simple Love Story... Please review, it keeps me going.. oh i didnt mention this in the other one deep breath I do not own harry Potter it belongs to J/K Rowling ad WB, i also do not own What I really Meant to say, that belongs to cyndi thomas...thank you.