Yes! I've only got three more days of school left! I feel like dancing but I'm not going to because that would be scary.

Chapter Six: Camp-outs and Mysterious Hobos

Aragorn, Legolas, and Gimli rode on until they came to the pile of burning Super Spork carcasses. "Well, it looks like it's time to put on the tragic act!" said Aragorn, starting to cry.

"Is it just me, or did some weird old man just appear over there?" said Gimli.

Aragorn shrugged. "I don't see any weird old men. You must be seeing things."

Gimli was still confused though. "I could have sworn I saw an old man- Hey! A belt thingy!" He picked it up and inspected it.

"Put that back, Gimli," said Legolas. "You don't know where it's been!"

"Fine, I'll get rid of it." And Gimli ate the belt.

Aragorn became frustrated. "Gimli! Why did you do that?" He kicked Gimli and the dwarf went flying. "AAAAGGHH!" Gimli screamed.

"AAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHH!" Aragorn screamed. "My foot!" He collapsed to the ground. "MAGICAL HOBS!"

"The Hobs are dead, Aragorn, remember?" Legolas reminded him.

"No, look. Some Magical Hobs were here. I'm a Ranger and I know these things. And you don't! So haha!" He looked carefully at the tracks. "It looks like they went into the Incredibly Old, Astoundingly Creepy, Impossibly Foreboding, Exceedingly Disturbing Forest."

Legolas danced around excitedly. "They went into the Incredibly Old, Astoundingly Creepy, Impossibly Foreboding, Exceedingly Disturbing Forest! Isn't that fascinating?"

Aragorn and Gimli sighed.

"What?" said Legolas. "It isn't my fault that I point out the obvious all the time!"

"Yes it is," said Aragorn.

"No it isn't!"

Gimli clapped a hand over both their mouths. "Quiet! I think I saw that old guy again! He was looking at me menacingly!"

"Relax, Gimli," said Aragorn. "He was probably some hobo."

Gimli laughed. "You're right. But I hope he doesn't come begging for spare change or beer or anything."

"Well, let's spend the night here," Aragorn suggested. "We can have a camp-out, and eat toasted lembas bread chunks!"

Legolas made a strangled sound of protest. "Excuse me! I'm not camping out here with all of this dirt and evil foreboding! Do you have any idea what ominous foreboding does to my hair?"

Aragorn laughed. "Like I would really care anything about hair!" He ran a hand through his own greasy mane.

"I'm putting my foot down on this!" Legolas said. "We are not camping here!"

Fifteen minutes later, Legolas lay on the ground next to a campfire listening to Aragorn and Gimli eat toasted lembas bread chucks. "Why do I never get my way? Why?"

"I don't know," grunted Gimli. "Aw! I just dropped my toasted lembas chunk right in my lap!"

"I'll eat it!" Aragorn offered.

"No! My precious!" Gimli picked up the bit of lembas bread and popped it into his mouth. "Hmm... it tastes a little bit like my dirty clothes, but it's still good!"

Legolas clamped his hands over his pointy ears. "Could you guys keep it down a bit? I'm trying to get my beauty rest!"

"Ha! Beauty rest!" laughed Aragorn. "Come on, Legolas, sit over here and enjoy the fun of the great outdoors!"

Legolas pulled his cloak over his face. "I don't think so."

"Suit yourself." Aragorn leaned over towards Gimli and whispered in his ear, "I say we put a spider under his cloak when he's asleep!"

Gimli winked. "Great idea!"

oOoOoOoOo

Meanwhile, Merry and Pippin were running around in the Incredibly Old, Astoundingly Creepy, Impossibly Foreboding, Exceedingly Disturbing Forest.

"Why does this forest have such a ridiculously long name?" Merry wanted to know.

"Beats me," said a mysterious voice. Merry and Pippin turned around and found themselves facing a creepy tree-like creature.

"AAAAAGGGGGHHHH! WHAT IS THAT THING?" Pippin screamed.

"You can call me an Ent," said the creature. "You can also call me a plot device."

"A plot device!" said Merry. "I've heard of those! They're shepherds of the plot advancement!"

"My name is Treebeard," said Treebeard.

"Nice to meet you, Mr. Talking Tree," said Pippin. "I'm Pippin and he's Merry!" Treebeard knocked Pippin to the ground in anger. "What did I do?" Pippin cried.

"I'M NOT A TREE!"

"Of course you are, you stupid tree!" said Merry.

"Don't call me that! I'm not a tree!"

"Then how come you have the word tree in your name?" Pippin asked. "You must be a tree!"

"No! I'm not!" Treebeard picked up Merry and Pippin in his hands and started squeezing them. "Now accept the fact that I am not a tree!"

"Okay," they said in unison.

Treebeard relaxed his grip on them. "Good. Now you're coming with me. I've always wanted Magical Hob action figures, and you guys are the next best thing! Actually, you're even better, because you're real!"

"That's kind of creepy," said Pippin. "And I didn't know talking trees knew about Magical Hobs."

Treebeard lost his temper. "FOR THE LAST TIME, I AM NOT A TREE! UNDERSTAND?"

Pippin nodded his head, too frightened to speak. Treebeard composed himself. "I'm going to take you to my weird little house now." And he walked along, taking the Magical Hobs with him.

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