You and I and Flowers

Rating: PG

Genre: Romance

Pairing(s): TakaFuji

Warning(s): None

Disclaimer: I don't own Prince of Tennis. If I did… let's not think about it.

Summary: Fuji can't always hold his emotions in; he has to break sometime, so he calls the person he feels that he can trust with his emotions the most.

Notes: Inspired by "And You and I" and "Hana," character songs sung by Taka and Fuji, respectively. Also, a bit by "Days of Moments," their duet song. Both single songs are so visual that I could not help but want to write concerning them. You'd see the connection if you read the lyrics.

This is for the TakaFuji revolution in the livejournal community. I decided to post it on so that people knew that I was still… moving.

Viva la revoluccíon!

Otusu namida no wake kikanai kara

Yoake made nakeba ii yo

I was lying there that night, thinking about the future. I did that a lot, especially as we neared graduation. It was my last year to play tennis. I would miss it, but tou-chan needed my help in the shop.

By giving up tennis, I was giving up a lot more then just a sport. Tennis was an essential part of my life, like the rest of the Regulars. I had close friends that, upon entering high school, I may not get to see so often if we do not make it into the same high school. We each had different goals for our future and had to start planning accordingly. My life was already chosen, and I was okay with it. I liked the shop.

But at least if I was in tennis, I could see them at tournaments, even if they were on the other side of the court.

By leaving tennis, I was loosing close contact with someone that I found that I liked. Though he was a guy, I felt this need to protect him. I never wanted to see him pained on my account.

My cell phone rang. I recognized the number and my heartbeat faltered. Why was he calling at this time of night? It was nearly midnight.

"Hello?" I answered the phone, trying to not sound unnerved.

"Taka-san?" Fuji's voiced reached me over the line.

"Fuji, are you alright?" I could hear the sound of rain far too clearly. "Where are you? Are you outside?" He had to be. Either that, or sitting next to an open window.

"Can you come here? I need to talk to someone." Though I could not hear any tone in his voice, I knew very well that it meant he was upset about something. "I'm at the bus station." He hung up.

I pulled a shirt and a pair of socks on quickly before running downstairs.

"Oi, Takeshi, where do you think you're going at this time of night?" Tou-chan asked as I passed him cleaning the sushi bar.

"I have something that I need to do," someone that I need to see, no matter what. I slipped on my shoes hurriedly.

"At least take an umbrella!" He called to me. I picked one up and headed out the door without another word. I would apologize later, but right now, I had to get to Fuji. I've finally found someone I liked that I never wanted to see cry because of me. I had to get to him as soon as possible.

It took about eleven minutes of running to reach the bus station without using the umbrella. My clothes were soaked and my lungs heaved with hard breath, but all I could do was look for him.

There he was, sitting on a bench. His legs were curled up against his chest with his forehead against his knees. He did not see that I had arrived. I began my approach slowly, unsure of how to take this. Something was definitely wrong.

"Fuji?" I stopped as he lifted his head with a jerk.

"Taka-san, you came." He unfolded his legs. "I'm sorry to call you so late. I didn't even think before dialing."

"Naa, that's alright." I sat next to him with our shoulders about a foot apart. It was our comfortable distance that we silently set a while ago. "Why did you want to talk?" It was stupid to ask. He was hurting for some reason.

"I just needed to see you." My heart felt so heavy then. I wanted to know exactly what was bothering him, but I wouldn't ask. He wasn't the type who liked pushing his problems onto other people. He was the type who took them, kept them, and conquered them on his own. He was also a bit of a hypocrite. When I would get injured on the court, he'd stop me, smile, and forfeit. He never allowed me to get to the point of serious injury, just sprains. But when he was injured continuously, he refused to give up; he beat his opponent on his own despite his physical pains.

I wondered why he protected me like that. He protected me when I was the one who desperately wanted to protect him. We were strange like that, I guessed. I protected him from outside forces, or at least, I tried to, and he protected me from my own stubborn foolhardy.

Perhaps that was one reason that I liked him.

"Why me?" I asked. "Buchou lives closer, as do Eiji and Oishi."

"Because you asked me once to always tell you all of my feelings without limits." He opened his eyes. They were a beautiful blue that I liked. "I feel that I can talk to you."

The wind-swept rain that caught us once in a while did not feel so cold now.

I wanted to tell him that he could tell me anything. I may have not been the most capable person in the world, but I was by his side, if that counted for anything.

I don't usually believe in fate, but being next to this person felt so right, so complete that sometimes I can't help but get the romantic notion that we were meant to meet. Was it wrong that I wanted to hold him? How did he feel about me?

"Fuji, you can cry if you need to."

Though he was already damp from the rain's spray, I noticed fresh liquid running down his cheeks. He made no sound as he cried, the tears just fell silently. All of his emotions were silently done. He did not want people to see them.

The threads holding them in were silently undone.

I half-turned towards him and held an arm out. He just fell with his face against my shoulder, not saying a word, not making a sound. The only reason that I knew that he was still crying was the warm liquid slowly making its way through my sleeve and the slightest quiver of his slim shoulders. How could such small shoulders hold up the immense amount of pain that it would take to make him cry? Fuji looked so delicate, but I knew that he was much stronger than he looked. He wasn't strong in the same way that I was, but on the inside, like I could never be. He never showed his pains and fear until now. His life was tennis and emotions got in the way on the courts. That near-stoicism carried over into actual life. I did not know him before our first year at Seigaku, so I do not know what he was like when he was younger, but I do know that I want to play a role in his future, no matter what that role may be.

Maybe, someday, I could help be rid of his sadness.

His shoulders stopped moving. He calmed down, as I could sense.

"Running around late like this works up an appetite," I broke the rain-drowned silence. "I'm hungry, want to eat something? I can cook us some sushi."

He lifted his face away from mine, the smiling mask returning. Fuji's face, his smile was sort of a mask. His face came to life with his expressions. It burst into color with his emotions.

But then he smiled for real and nodded. I liked the way that his hair moved when he nodded to me and meant it. I liked the way a real smile tugged at his lips.

He was the one person in the world most precious to me. More than my parents, more than my little sister, this person was the one that I wanted to stay with the most. I wanted to protect him. I loved him. I wished that I could be with him for all the days to come so that we could talk more about dreams and plans for the future together. Those dreams were invaluable. I wished that he could be so open with me always and that I could always be there to receive those emotions, the good and the bad. I wanted to share all of our feelings with each other.

We started back for the sushi shop. This time, I opened the unused umbrella and moved it towards him to hand over. Rather than take it, he scooted closer to me and we walked arm-against-arm all the way back.

"Fuji," I started quietly, as if the raindrops themselves were listening in, "I'm not going to ask you what's wrong, but I want you to know that if there is anything that I can do, I will, no matter what."

"I know," his head brushed my shoulder and I blushed, "I know, Taka-san. It seems that you're always by my side, but I don't mind."

Yeah, he was the most precious person to me in the world. At that time, only we existed. The random passing cars did not make sound; the streetlamps did not cast off light. We were our own entities, immune to this world and just together in a comfortable way that we both came to enjoy.

I wondered just how long I would make appearances in his life. It was not like we were in any sort of relationship above the platonic level, so I had no real reason to be thinking as such, but I wanted to know. I wanted to say that I wanted to be with him forever, but such notions were childish, especially since we were both male. If… if Fuji did reciprocate my feelings, then… well, we could never get married or have a family.

But I did not have to worry about such things, did I? Since all of that was some fairytale in my mind and nothing more. Fuji would find a girlfriend someday, marry her, and raise a family of his own. I was certain of it.

But still… I saw that shoulder against my own. I felt that body so close to me. He was here, with me, not pushing me away when he cried, calling out to me. Various parts of me wanted to do different things. My body wanted to kiss him, hold him, and never let him go. My head wanted to stay like this; just like this. My heart wanted to tell him how I felt.

Perhaps I should just let things stay as they were. If I told him, he would push my away. If I made a move, which I myself was too timid to do, he would distance himself, and he was too important for me to let either happen.

Love was making me look more idiotic than ever.

We made it to the sushi shop in twenty minutes time. He sat down silently at the bar while I switched equipment on and gathered ingredients and tools as quietly as I could. I made sure to get the wasabi, since I knew Fuji loved it. No one could quite understand why, though.

I felt horrible that his face was in a small frown, but I did not know which subjects were safe to bring up. I did not want to accidentally ask about something that was related to his depression.

But I had to say something. Heavy silence was never healthy for anyone, as tou-chan taught me.

"Fuji," I called, though hushed, since my family seemed to have gone to bed, "next time, don't sit out in the rain like that. You'll catch a cold." I said it lightly so that he would not take it as a scolding. "You can just come over. We can talk."

"Thank you, Taka-san."

I liked hearing him say my name. His voice was beautiful. He was beautiful.

When I first realized that I thought that he was attractive, I tried to convince myself that I was just wrong, or perhaps just curious. Then I tried to tell myself that it was because he looked effeminate. Then I told myself that he was just a close friend and I was getting confused as to where the line between love and friendship was.

And then I just fell for him. I gave up and let my emotions take over.

I watched him eat in silence, hoping that I could indeed cook. After all, if I was to take over the sushi bar someday, I needed to live up to tou-chan's expectations.

"It's good," he smiled. I felt warmer. "But Taka-san, if we're talking about catching colds, maybe you should change out of those clothes."

Right, I was still wet. I had dried a little in the time that it had taken to prepare everything, but my clothes were still damp and chilly. "Ah, right, I'll be right back, then." I ran up to my room as quietly as I could and grabbed clothes. I didn't even notice exactly how wet I was until my shirt was clinging to me when I tried to remove it. I grabbed the first T-shirt I could find and pulled it on, and then changed the rest of my clothes.

I was careful to stay quiet as I went back down the stairs. Luckily, I had a family of heavy sleepers.

When I came back down, Fuji was half-finished and staring off in thought. His eyes were open with a distracted look that made me pause and stare. Beautiful.

But then he snapped out of it and took another bite. It was then that I decided that I could move and rejoin him. I wondered what could make him like that. I wanted to know, but I would not ask. I would just be there, hopefully not in his way.

"Yeah, I feel warmer now," I grinned as I sat down next to him. "You're not wet, are you?"

He shook his head. No, he wasn't. He must have been outside, at that station, before it started raining. I wanted to know why. "I feel warm, right now."

We sat in the silence of one another for a few moments. It was a nice feeling, finally, rather than a pressing depression. I finally broke this silence to speak about classes, for I was fairly sure that the subject was not what was bothering him. After all, Fuji was a genius. As we talked, he finished his sushi.

Did he want to go home? We just kept talking, though quietly, still mindful of my family upstairs.

"Fuji," I asked, finally, "do you want to stay… until the rain stops?" I blushed. "Or, I can loan you an umbrella, if you wanted to leave… you could also spend the rest of the night, if you want to." I was messing up my words. They were coming out in a spewing tone that embarrassed me.

"Is it alright?" He asked. "For me to stay, I mean."

I smiled. "Of course. We're friends, right?"

Another real smile came as a reply. I could imagine the emotions behind that smile smothered by the darker things plaguing his mind and covered by his mask.

"Do you want to go upstairs?" I asked. He nodded in reply. "I just need to put these things up." I took his plate and put it in the dish washer with the other things I used that night. "Okay, let's go"

He followed me quietly up the stairs. I realized, abruptly, that it would be his first time to see my room. I suddenly wished that I had cleaned it earlier. As we entered, he stood off to the side. There were books on my desk, mostly history books, from which I was doing homework before I started thinking about the future. The clothes that I had just changed out of were on the floor. The bed showed obvious signs that I had laid in it with the blanket tossed aside and sheets shifted. I supposed that it was in a state of disarray, but I am quite sure that I am not the messiest of the Regulars.

"You can sit down," I offered, not wanting him to feel that he had stand if he wanted to sit. It was just traditional courtesy.

He sat at the foot of the bed and I sat next to him, though our proper distance away. I didn't know what to say, though. I still did not know what was hurting him, and therefore what should not be mentioned.

"Taka-san," he took that burden for me, "you… are still planning on quitting tennis after this year, ne?"

I nodded. "I love working in the shop. I mean, I love tennis as well, and…" why was I trying to explain it, "it is true that you get this feeling on the court that you don't get anywhere else, but," I paused again, "I want to be the best sushi chef in Japan someday. That's been my dream." I thought of Gen-san and what he had taught me.

He was silent to my answer and I was afraid that he thought that I did not care about tennis, or worse, that he thought of me as an idiot now.

"I've always liked tennis," he answered, "and I've always been better at it than most people my age. I guess… I've always wanted to be the best in the world. I do know that I used to have dreams of doing other things. I just don't remember what anymore."

"I'm sure that you'll become the best, some day." Perhaps it was just my foolhardy heart saying that. "And when you are, come back for some sushi, on the house."

"When you're the best sushi chef in Japan," he smiled. I laughed. We both had our dreams. They just had no correlation with one another. That made me sad, but I could not let myself feel that. This was too good a moment.

"This is nice," Fuji commented, "talking to you like this. It makes me feel more at ease." He sighed and his features became serious. "I… don't know why I did that—broke down like that."

"That's okay," I assured him. "E-everyone breaks down some time. It's… normal." I sighed, nervous. "No one can hold the weight of the world on their shoulders."

Silence greeted my revelation.

A small tremor ran through my body as his fingers touched mine softly, as if I was dreaming them. Then, slight pressure was applied. I will give myself credit in that I did not freak out (as some mental scenarios concluded when I wondered what would happen if such a situation as this had come up). I hardly able to react, he slid his fingers across the back of my hand and took my hand. I blushed and didn't look at him. I was afraid that he would be looking at me. "Thank you, Taka-san."

"It's alright, Fuji." I you needed to, you could cry until morning came.

His head touched my shoulder. "I'm sorry, I'm just really tired," he tried to excuse himself. I didn't mind. It was a comfortable weight against me.

Twenty minutes passed in that silence before I knew that he was asleep. I imagined that the emotional trip must have worn him out. It was normal.

I laid him out on my bed and covered him with the blanket. It was fairly warm in my room, but sometimes a blanket is more of a comfort object than it is something for warmth. At least, that was how it used to work for my sister.

I turned off the light and sat back on the foot of the bed, leaning my back against the wall, since Fuji had curled on his side and there was room for me to sit alone the bed's width. And, ultimately, I did fall asleep.

The alarm woke me up at five-thirty, as it normally would. I rubbed by eyes and wondered why I was in such a weird position. Then I got up and turned off the alarm, still wondering why, until I looked at who was waking up in my bed. Then I remembered the last night and suddenly felt awake, despite gaining very little sleep.

"Mm, Taka-san?" Fuji asked, not quite awake.

"Ah, yeah," I blushed, "we fell asleep."

"It's Sunday, right?" He yawned mid-sentence. I nodded in reply. Yeah, it was. We didn't have school, which was always a good thing if one had not slept the night before. My alarm was set mostly because I like to train early in the morning, before the shop opened, but I had the feeling that I would not be doing that this morning.

I opened the window. The sun had not yet come up, but the sky was lightening just a bit. Turning on a lamp light, I heard him speak again.

"I'm sorry that I stayed overnight."

"It's alright." I wondered about his family for the first time, I realized. Would they be missing him? Or were they the reason that he left? Even so, they could still be worried sick.

But… I didn't want to bring it up. If they were the reason he cried, I did not want to see him do it again, least of all because of something that I did or said.

"You can go back to sleep if you want," I told him as I found a clean shirt and changed into it. I supposed that I could wear the other clothes this morning, since I had changed into them so late last night.

He shook his head and got out of the bed slowly. "I should get up." He looked a bit better than he had when I first saw him the previous night, though still a bit ragged. The mask was off.

I know that many people think of me as so innocently naïve that I cannot initiate any sort of romantic action. Perhaps most of the time they were right. But at that moment, I took those few steps between Fuji and I, closed them, and wrapped my arms around him, burying the lower half of my face in his hair. His hands clenched into the fabric of my shirt, pulling himself into me. This small form, seeming so fragile, housed one of the strongest people I knew. He was the person that I found that I liked. I hoped that we could take at least some of the next steps one by one, together, and share all our feelings with each other. We could discover the paths laid out for us, whether they were the ones we predicted or otherwise, together.

In that moment, it felt possible.

"Fuji," I sighed into him, "I like you." A pang of guilt hit me right when the words left my mind and entered my mouth. What if telling him this only hurt him more? I let go of him hastily and walked a couple of steps away, back facing him. "I-I'm sorry," I mumbled, "I shouldn't have said anything."

I felt that I should have flinched as the same fingers from last night slid down my forearm and wrapped around my wrist. They were such beautiful fingers. I did not protest as he led my arm to turn me around, facing him. His eyes were open and he was looking up at me, so many emotions dancing in the blue recesses. "Taka-san, you're the only one that I can show my feelings to. Not even my family has seen me cry since I was very little." He brought his head so close to my chest, yet, not touching. The hair on his head was caressing my chin with its feather-touches. That moment was everything, despite being only a moment.

"Hey, let's go outside," I suggested suddenly. "We can walk together, stretch our legs." My legs were stiff, but that was caused from how I had slept, more likely than not. He nodded lightly. My heart was beating like a drum, hard and in rhythm.

I led him downstairs, our hands connected through interlocked fingers. What exactly did this mean for me, for him, or for anyone? I did not know. I did not know if I was really right to assume that it meant anything.

But it felt right.

There was a little bit of drizzle when we stepped outside. The sun was just starting to emerge on the horizon with its warm colors—reds, oranges, and yellows. It painted the drops with bits of light. I was getting wet, as was Fuji, but that did not seem to matter so much, in that moment. There was a light breeze blowing that felt nice.

I turned to Fuji and saw him looking at me with those eyes that were the window to his heart. I blushed.

We had let our hands part while we put on our shoes, but now his hand took mine again. I realized just how cold mine were when I felt the warmth flowing between us, from him to me.

His eyes were in thought as he peered at me. I wondered what it was that he thought so hard about. There was that reaffirming smile. This precious moment.

"Taka-san, do you care about me?"

I faltered, for the words he used left little doubt as to whether or not he wanted to reaffirm that I liked him. "Y-yes," I stammered, confidence draining, "I do… care about you. A lot." I clenched down on myself, trying to calm my pounding, burning heart. "You… I feel that you are the most important person to me."

He laughed in that way of his. "How did I ever get that ranking?" I couldn't answer and he did not wait for one. "Taka-san, let's make a promise. Though you may not play tennis, and though we may be separated in high school, will you stay by my side?"

I was grinning. "Of course; I promise."

We each held our right little fingers out to one another and crossed them as the child's handshake on promises went. We didn't say the words, but we dipped our hands three times. On the third time, as our hands were reaching the bottom of their fall, Fuji closed the distance between us and pressed his lips to the corner of my mouth. I blushed again and he smiled in an inviting way.

"I will warn you," I said slowly, closing my eyes with a sigh. "I may not live up to your expectations." I opened them again and he was still there, looking at me.

"Taka-san, my heart is satisfied by you just being you."

We took each others hands again, ready to walk with each other down our respective paths that were merging with one another, straightforward, ahead of us. Whatever was ahead of us, I had a good feeling about it. We would make use of our respective colors and take on tomorrow together.

Feeling rather brave or perhaps foolhardy once again, I leaned over and kissed him, happy that I could bring a smile back to his eyes.

Sekaijyuu de hitori daisetsu da yo

Ashita mo futari deitai

Kimi to… boku to… itsumo

…wow, I finished it. (I started this in July.)

What insightful thing to say? The end of this was rather rushed, I must admit. The first half sat around for two months, I slowly refining it.

Review! My pink bear Fuji plushy (really, I own a Fuji plushy in a pink bear outfit) and I demand it! Or, at least request it. Please? (I really need the blue bear Taka one, now.)