A/N: I do not own the song "Addicted" by Simple Plan or any other song featured in this chapter.
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Chapter Four: Addicted
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Gordo's eyes fluttered open to meet the morning sunlight shining through a familiar pair of French doors, lighting up the entire room. Outside, birds were chirping. The entire house smelled like fresh-cut flowers. Playing from somewhere upstairs was an older tune: "'Cause you're everywhere to me, and when I close my eyes, it's you I see…"
Gordo stood up slowly. His head was pounding in pain. He sat back down. He hadn't been hung-over in the McGuire house in years. Now it was the perfect time. He wanted to slap himself for being so stupid. He shouldn't have gotten drunk. But he didn't know he was going to see Lizzie. He was just thanking his lucky stars that he hadn't blurted out something last night that he would have regretted.
He tried standing up again. He walked around the living room slowly, looking at all of the pictures that sprinkled the room. Not much had changed. Most of the same timeless photographs were still standing in their usual spots. Gordo's eyes then fell on the mantel, which no longer housed a Dick Butkus football, but new pictures he had never seen before. A picture of Lizzie singing the National Anthem at the World Series last year; a picture of Matt and his parents outside of his dorm the day he moved to college; a picture of Lizzie on college graduation day; and a picture of Lizzie, Matt, and Isabella outside the Coliseum. Gordo smiled at each and every one of them.
He walked into the kitchen, ignoring his throbbing head. The place felt so familiar, as if he had been here yesterday, sitting and talking with Lizzie and Miranda. Oh, Miranda. It had been about six months since he had heard from her. She and her husband liked to travel a lot, mostly to remote places with no phones. They were in Peru or someplace down in South America now.
Suddenly, Michelle Branch was turned off upstairs, and a few moments later, a guitar could be heard and a voice singing, "Here's the thing, we started out friends…"
Gordo smiled. Ten years later, Lizzie was listening to the same music. Slowly, the volume got louder and louder. "Since you been gone, I can breathe for the first time…"
Gordo sat for a moment and contemplated everything that happened last night. He found himself in the presence of the very girl that had broken his heart, caused him so pain and misery, crushed his spirit… and made him thank God every day he was alive just so he could remember her.
-I heard you're doing okay, but I want you to know, I'm a d-ck, I'm addicted to you-
Lizzie turned off her music as she slipped on her shoes. She hadn't felt so normal in such a long time. She was in jeans and a tee with her soaking, shower-fresh hair, listening to Kelly Clarkson, and Gordo was downstairs. She felt like she was fourteen again. Even though she knew Gordo was asleep on the couch with a hangover and wearing nothing but baggy pants, she still felt comfort in knowing he was there. She knew she was being stupid, but she was just glad he was there.
-I can't pretend I don't care when you don't think about me. Do you think I deserve this?-
She bounded down the stairs like a teenager, humming the Brady Bunch song "It's a Sunshine Day". She could not believe what a good mood she was in.
Gordo was awake, to her surprise, and sitting in the kitchen. He was looking around the room as if he had never been there before, and but as soon as he heard Lizzie walk in, his eyes went to her and he smiled.
"Hey," he said.
"Hi," she replied, going to the fridge. "How'd you sleep last night?"
Gordo rubbed his head. "Great, actually. Your couch is ten times more comfortable than my bed."
Lizzie giggled as she grabbed orange juice and chocolate milk and put them on the counter.
"You hungry?" she asked.
He shook his head. "Um, can I just have some Advil? My head is pounding."
Lizzie got a pill bottle out of the counter and slid it to him.
"You okay?" she asked.
"Yep," he answered as he dry-swallowed the pills.
"I had a hang – um, a headache this morning, too," she said, pouring him some chocolate milk. "I feel a little better." She handed him the glass.
"Chocolate milk," he said. "My fave." He drank the entire thing in one sip.
Lizzie giggled, watching him. She was amazed that the last time she talked to him, they were screaming at each other and she was crying her eyes out. Now here they were, two years later, acting just like old friends.
Sure, Lizzie was grateful for this. Not only did Gordo show up at her house last night, but he was being so nice to her. Considering their history, this was like a miracle. She watched him wipe his chocolate milk mustache off of his face with the back of his hand, just like he used to do, and she smiled, feeling her heart flutter. Even though their break-up had been messy, they still had had those eight years together, and twenty-years of friendship. No matter what had happened between them, there was something there.
-I tried to make you happy, but you left anyway-
"So, do you need a ride to your hotel?" she asked him. "I'll drive you there."
"Oh, yeah," he said distressfully. He ran his hand through his curly hair. "I forgot about that. I don't want to put you out, Lizzie. I can just call a cab."
"No, that's totally fine," Lizzie replied. "Besides, you need to be cleaned up." She looked him up and down and started laughing. "You're a mess."
Gordo laughed, too, as he looked at her and thought, 'You're beautiful.'
-I'm trying to forget that I'm addicted to you, but I want it and I need it. I'm addicted to you-
Gordo took a shower in Matt's bathroom upstairs while rummaged through her closet. She knew she had at least one item of Gordo's clothes in there. Finally she found a worn, faded tee that proudly read "JUDGING IS OVERRATED". They found it in some beatnik store in Malibu one summer. Lizzie said she didn't get it, which Gordo found amusing, and to make up for it he bought her this gorgeous bracelet made of purple and pink sea glass. She went to her jewelry box. It was still in there. She slipped it on her wrist, listening to the jingling sound it made, wondering if he remembered.
When Gordo got out of the shower and wrapped a towel around himself, he jumped ten feet in the air to find Lizzie in Matt's room.
"Sorry!" she called out. "I was just leaving you some clothes. I'll be out in second!" She rushed out the door and shut it behind her, laughing. She hadn't embarrassed Gordo like that in a long time. Not that that was intentional. She went back downstairs and found her car keys on the counter. She missed this. She missed him being around. But she had to remember that they had been apart for two whole years. They were leading different lives. She tried to remember the pain she felt when they broke up but she couldn't. She just kept laughing.
-Now it's over; can't forget what you said. And I never want to do this again. Heartbreaker-
Gordo got changed and brushed his teeth with an extra toothbrush he found. It weird that he wasn't going to work in a minute, which was what he was so used to doing. That reminded him of the meeting he had. He looked at his watch. It was 7:36. Did he have time to make it to his hotel and then the meeting? That would be asking a lot from Lizzie.
"So, what hotel are you staying at?" Lizzie asked him when he came downstairs.
"The L.A. Sheraton," he replied. "Do you know how much time it takes to get there?"
"Um, about twenty minutes," she said. "Why? Is there something you need get to?"
"Yeah, a meeting. The place is only three blocks away from the hotel but I need to get in my room somehow first. I have no idea where my key is."
Lizzie thought about it for a moment. Gordo took her hesitation to mean that she didn't want to drive him all over L.A., so he said, "I'm sorry. I'll just call a cab."
"No, no!" she exclaimed. "Gordo, I'll drive you there. No worries. Hakuna Matata. We'll just need to go really fast."
Gordo eyed her suspiciously, considering she was grinning from ear-to-ear. "How fast does your car go?"
Lizzie giggled and led himself outside to the Ferrari in the driveway. To his jaw that was on the ground, she said, "Hop in."
-Since the day I met you and after all we've been through, still a d-ck, I'm addicted to you-
The two went slowly through the streets of Hillridge but once they were on the highway, they were speeding past everyone. With the top down and the wind strong, they couldn't even hear anything. But Lizzie was hooting and hollering. This was thrilling. Not the sped (though that was cool) but the fact that she was speeding along with Gordo. They both laughed and blasted the radio: "We've been on the run, driving in the sun, looking out for number one. California, here we come, right back where we started from…"
They slowed down once they got off the highway. They laughed at each other's hair, which was huge and wind-blown. Cruising down streets and boulevards, everything was comfortable, as if the last two years had never even happened.
-I think you know that it's true. I'd run a thousand miles to get you. Do you think I deserve this?-
Lizzie pulled up to the hotel and let Gordo out. He turned to look at her and sighed. She sighed, too. Were there words? No, there wasn't. But Gordo attempted anyway.
"Lizzie, thank you for this. It was fun. We should do it again sometime."
Lizzie gulped. "Um, yeah, we should." She got out of the car, looked him straight in the eye until her knees grew weak, and gave him a hug. "Don't be a stranger, alright? Call me if you're ever in L.A. again." She pulled back. "I've really missed you."
Gordo found it hard to breathe. "I missed you, too."
-I tried to keep you happy. I did all that I could just to keep you, but you left anyway-
They stood there looking at each for a long time, taking in every thing about each other. Memories rushed in their minds, and for a brief moment, both of them thought of the same one. It was ten years ago and they were as close as they were now. Gordo had flown to Rome to see Lizzie and she came off the stage she was performing on and kissed him. That kiss was still sweet in both of their minds. Lizzie moved her head in a little closer. Did she dare? Did she? She did not know if she was that bold, but it seemed she could try.
-I'm trying to forget that I'm addicted to you, but I want it and I need it. I'm addicted to you-
At that moment, a car behind Lizzie's beeped. Both of them turned away, embarrassed. The moment was ruined, lost forever. Gordo did his nervous thing running his hand through his hair and blowing out of his mouth.
"I've got to go," Lizzie said, getting back inside the car. She took one last look at Gordo and he at her. There was silence except for the car beeping behind them. Disappointed, Lizzie put the car in drive and was about to pull away when Gordo said, "Lizzie, wait."
"Yeah?"
He leaned back inside the car, and for a second Lizzie thought he was going to kiss her. Instead, he said, "Do you want to do something this afternoon?"
Lizzie's ears perked up. "Sure. How about we meet at the Digital Bean for lunch?"
Gordo laughed. "The Digital Bean. I haven't been there in years. Alright, sounds good. See you at noon. And thanks again."
"You're welcome," she weakly before she pulled away, feeling sorry for herself. Would seeing Gordo again help her or hurt her? Maybe she should have just let it be. Or maybe they could be friends again.
-Now it's over; can't forget what you said. And I never want to do this again. Heartbreaker-
Gordo watched Lizzie drive away until she was just a spec amidst the L.A. traffic. His heart was doing flip-flops. Did he really want to put himself through the agony of being near her again? Yes, he did, he decided. He went inside. It was better than never seeing her again. That might just kill after last night and this morning.
-How long will I be waiting? Until the end of time-
Gordo was able to get back in his room. It seemed small. He sighed when he looked around and got changed into a suit. He kept the shirt Lizzie had underneath of it, though, because he was comfortable in it. It made him happy. It would give him confidence through his meeting. It was important to his career.
But the meeting was miniscule in his mind. The entire time he thought about Lizzie, even when he was giving his presentation about his film. He pictured her in the back of the room, smiling at him.
-I don't know why I'm still waiting. I can't make you mine-
Lizzie waited for noon anxiously. She paced around the living room and lied down on the bed where Gordo had slept. She was nervous, as if this was a date. She knew it wasn't, but she missed him so much it didn't matter. Feelings didn't just disappear like that.
-I'm trying to forget that I'm addicted to you, but I want it and I need it. I'm addicted to you. I'm trying to forget that I'm addicted to you, but I want it and I need it. I'm addicted to you. Now it's over; can't forget what you said. And I never want to do this again. Heartbreaker, heartbreaker, heartbreaker… heartbreaker-