Disclaimer: I don't own the X-Men. Ilehana Xavier belongs to Corrinth. All other characters belong to me.

A/N: Thank you to all my reviewers out there; you really are all stars.

Scene 30

"Remy..." Blaze was at his side before he'd realised she'd been gone, taking his hand in hers. She didn't wince or pull away as briefly he charged her palm with his mutant power, just to convince himself he wasn't alone. Her hand throbbed as he held it, the fingers of Blaze's other hand stroking his hair back from his brow. His eyes slowly closed as he put all his effort into drawing his power back. It took more effort than he was comfortable with, dropping Blaze's hand in sudden awareness that he may just have nearly blown it off.

"Blaze, I..." She put a warm finger to his lips, quieting him just before he began to cough again. Unwittingly, Blaze turned her face away; trying to hide the swell of fear she was now losing the fight against. Gambit didn't notice, numbness from the drugs he had been given drifting like deep winter snowfall, collecting in his limbs in drifts. His arms and legs felt heavy, leaden, his mind was becoming numb. Sleep may take him any moment, and he couldn't be sure he'd ever wake again. As if reading his mind, a skill she had once been capable of but had long now been gone, Blaze put a hand to his shoulder and whispered to him. "Sleep, Remy. I'm right here, I'll watch over you."

"No..." He spluttered, trying to roll onto his back to get a better look at her. "I ain't sleepin'. I sleep when I'm dead."

"Stop it." Blaze demanded as gently as she could, heart swollen and sore to hear him speak like that. "You're not going to die, you just have to rest to get better..." All through her speaking to him, she stroked his hair with her fingers as comfortingly as she could be. Like a mother with a sick kid, Gambit thought randomly, though he couldn't imagine Blaze with a child. His head swam, his skin tugging at him across his broad shoulders as if suddenly it was too small. So, lesions already... But he couldn't place their significance any more, swamped with numbness of body and mind. "Just rest Rem..." Blaze continued to soothe, and he felt himself giving in to her order.

"No." Stubborn as ever, he forced opened his eyes, daring himself to fight the sedative. "Too much to say, too much to tell you..."

"Tell me when you're better." Blaze whispered, knowing tears were seconds from flooding down her face but fighting them as much as she fought to keep her hand and voice steady.

"I ain't gettin' better." He pointed out, and then as if to emphasise his point fell into the heaviest bout of coughing he'd had so far. "Laura..." He gasped between coughs, tasting blood on his tongue and hating that he couldn't think straight. "I have to..."

"Stop it," Blaze took hold of his hand again, squeezed it hard, not caring that he might blow it up. Gambit didn't think that he had the strength to blow anything up right then, breath short and shallow, lesions ripping his skin. "Stop trying to say goodbye. Its not over..."

"It is... For me..." Gambit's voice was hoarse, crippled by the restrictions the lesions on his lungs were causing to his breathing. He was suddenly very grateful for Ilehana's dose of painkillers. Remy could imagine now how much pain Colossus had been in before he was found... "Nothin' for it Petite... I'se just wish..."

"Wish what?" Blaze could barely ask as another cough subsided, tears in free flow now and heart bleeding.

"That I done a better job of lookin' after you..." Remy whispered, and though his eyes were closed, his fingers stroked the scars on Blaze's left forearm. Wordlessly Blaze shook her head, fighting the temptation to pull away from his touch, a touch that knew too much about her. "I'se sorry... I let you down Blaze..."

"No." Blaze told him forcefully, not believing that he could even think that. "No, Remy, you're wrong. You're wrong..." Laura choked on a sob, desperate to make him understand. If this really was it, he had to know the truth... "Its me who should be saying sorry, and I am, Rem. So sorry... For pushing you away when you were only trying to help, for not seeing that you were here for me, trying to help me..."

"How come I'se not allowed to say goodbye, but you is..." Gambit's voice was little more than a whisper in the darkness of the moment; his eyes kept closing unbidden, breath almost empty and gone.

"I'm not saying goodbye." Blaze put as much truth in that statement as she could, hoping he couldn't tell she was lying. "I wont. It's not over. I'm just saying sorry, and I should have said it much earlier than this."

"Laura, ain't nothin' to say sorry 'bout..." Gambit countered her, his whole world numb, his mind scrambled. He didn't even know if she was still stood there, couldn't sense anything anymore. His treacherous mouth babbled on, and all the while some part of him despaired that he couldn't stop himself from baring his soul. "Nothin', nothin'..." Blaze watched, knowing Gambit was slipping out of it, just like Ilehana had predicted, and sudden realised what her friend had been asking if she was prepared to see. "If you knew anythin'... If you knew what you meant..." He coughed again, a weak cough like a newborn kitten struggling with its first breath. "What you mean to me..."

"Don't!" Blaze sobbed, not knowing whether to embrace him or turn and walk away. She turned to the door, pulling back on her tears, fighting her firepower. But she couldn't leave; an invisible rope tugged her right back to his side, to hold him like she'd once held their daughter. "Don't give up like this! You're the strong one, Remy, you can fight it!" Sobs cut through her, tremors of dread not far removed from the coughs that creased his face with discomfort. "After everything..."

"After everything, I'se let you down again. I can't fight this." If she hadn't been holding him, Blaze would not have heard his words, they were so quiet, cost him so much energy he didn't have to spare.

"Yes you can." Blaze clung to the hope, faint though it was like the scent of jasmine on a winter gale. She had never felt so cold. "Yes you can Remy, you have to. I can't do this without you... You're the only person that has ever made me feel safe. You make me feel safe, Remy, you make me feel safe..." Her fear and dread destroyed her, but at least she'd made him understand... Slowly, Gambit nodded at her, unable to speak any more. And then Blaze realised what she'd done. She'd said goodbye. Now he'd no reason to hang on...

"Laura..." He breathed, and she knew what he wanted. One last goodbye, to let him relax and slip away from her. And it was the one thing she couldn't give him; tears sliding like glaciers over her soft skin, lips pale and taunt, and eyes bloodshot and aching. She held him to her, his weight and warmth a comfort; she kissed his brow but shied away from anything more. Why? Why carry on without him? How easy would it be to kiss his lips, just one last time, to give him what he wanted? He wouldn't know it would kill her, a kiss of death, and a kiss of escape...

Jessica. In the last second before Laura's lips touched Remy's in that bitter sweet moment, she remembered the one reason why she had to keep going, keep fighting, keep trying. With a sob that would break even the stoniest heart, she pulled away, shaking her head, hating herself. Remy knew then what he'd almost done, it shook him like one more of the ever present wracking coughs that he had even got close, close to passing on this cursed virus, to killing his best friend...

"Sleep." She told him, mouth barely forming the word. "Sleep. I'm right here. Its my turn to keep you safe..."