The clock chimed and her watch beeped in about a minute's span of each other. Squall groaned. It was officially midnight, and he hadn't slept a wink; his companion however, much to his dismay was fast asleep. Lucky.
The brunette frowned, vaguely wondering if he was an insomniac before this. He sighed, running his fingers through his hair. Rinoa. It had been brought up so many times before, and it still wasn't even helping identify which girl in the photo album she was. It was like every name he heard or person he was being taught about was going into the trash bin area of his brain, and it was driving him crazy.
The fear of not remembering anything was growing. He shook his head, trying not to imagine what would become of him if he didn't remember. Would things be any different? He had been told he had friends, but he apparently didn't have any family except for a father he wasn't fond of. Supposedly, that girl, Rinoa and him and his had been close; but if he couldn't even remember her - was she that important as he had been told?
Quistis shifted in her sleep in the bed opposite of his. He was pretty sure she was asleep anyways, unless she could fake sleep well - which he doubted. Squall looked over at, she clearly looked more comfortable when she was sleep than when she was awake, or when she was with him. That thought alone made his stomach knot.
She turned over again. He frowned she had been sleeping fine until now, he shrugged it off. She probably was just one of those people that tossed and turned in their sleep. Squall turned back to the window, it would make her even more uncomfortable if she knew he staring at her while she slept.
His fingers once again found his necklace. It was heavy, probably made of metal; it even made the metal chain sink down with it's weight. He sighed, bringing up to the light. It was hard to see, the lights were off and the moonlight wasn't giving off much light; he almost had to squint to make out the features.
Where had he gotten it? Had the girl... Rinoa, yes, that was her name; had she given it to him? He supposed it would have made sense, he had been told he had given her a ring. Maybe it was an exchange of jewellery? Maybe he had fallen in love with her? Or what if she loved him, and it was unrequited? Maybe it was unrequited, but who would he have been in love with instead? The Selphie girl was engaged to that cowboy person, and he was fairly sure he wouldn't have been going around having affairs. Maybe one of the girls at the school? What if it was Quistis?
No. She had told him they hadn't been in love; but 'we' referred to both parties. What if he loved her, and she hadn't returned the feelings? Maybe it had been the other way around? No, she wasn't even uncomfortable around him. That wouldn't have worked. Maybe it was just that he didn't love the Rinoa person back? No; for some reason that didn't sound right.
Nothing sounded right anymore.
He let the pendent fall back to his chest again, there were too many unanswered questions about that. Squall sighed again, he glanced towards his own bed. It didn't even look inviting. He wasn't ready to sleep anyways; he had gone through the photo album several times - it was officially no help.
The only one he could rely on for telling him anything was asleep. He couldn't blame her though, it had been a long day of questions, mostly interrogation on his behalf. She was probably sick of him by now, having to answer so many useless questions. She had told him they were friends, she hadn't specified which kind though. Acquaintances? Best friends? Probably not best friends, not on her behalf anyways. She treated him with respect, but couldn't even stand to brush elbows with him.
He trusted her though. He wasn't even sure why, just for some reason he knew he could trust her. Was it because she was the only one he knew he could trust her? Because she was the one he had been sent off with? Was that why? He thought about it for a moment. No. He didn't think it was.
Squall's gaze once again travelled over to her. The blonde shifted once again, as if to say: 'Don't even think about it.' He moved over to his own bed, being near the window was a bit chilly. He cocked his head, it wasn't a lecherous stare. Not that there would have been anything to stare at even, as she was covered by at least two layers of blankets and a baggy shirt and pants. It was more a look of curiosity.
Her breathing quickened suddenly, snapping him out of his stupid gaze. It then occurred to him that she wasn't just a person that moved a lot in their sleep. He watched her as she tossed and turned in sleep delirium, she shook her head and turned in his direction.
[ o [ o [ o
A flower of fields. She had been there before; she knew where it was, a smile crossed her lips. The sea was near, she could hear the gulls, and the air smelt like salt. There was every kind of flower there, tulips, roses, daffodils, irises... white lilies.
The sound of footsteps made her turn around. A girl in blue and black was approaching her. "Quistis?" The person asked. Yes, that was her name, wasn't it?
The blonde nodded, staring at the sky. Petals were starting to fall from the sky. Petals? She thought oddly, it doesn't rain flowers... She turned back to the other girl. "Rinoa.." The name somehow made her uncomfortable. "What are you doing here?"
Rinoa turned to her. "I'm waiting." She told her quietly.
"Why?" Quistis asked, confused, cupping her hands to catch the petals.
"Because I promised." The raven-haired girl said with a smile.
"Promised?" The blonde repeated. "Who did you promise?" She asked as the petal touched her hands. They turned into feathers on impact, and she stared in awe.
"I promised Squall I'd be here, that I would wait... so if I came here, he'd find me; but you're here now." Rinoa told her quietly.
She didn't know what to say. Apologize maybe? The sky was raining more petals.
"He'll be here soon." Rinoa said, looking up at the petals. She turned and started walking.
"Where are you going?" Quistis asked. "You said he'd be here soon, so why are you leaving? You promised!" She called after the girl.
"Because your promise replaced mine." It felt like someone had punched her in the stomach, and it almost made it hard to breathe.
"No, wait! You don't understand!" It was too late. She watched in horror as the wings sprouted from the other girls back, feathers scattered everywhere, suddenly as sharp as knives. She shielded herself as her sliced her skin, before falling to the ground tipped with blood. The blonde looked up to where the other girl had been. She was gone.
The petals were now piling up, falling from the sky like relentless rain. Soon they were at her shoulders, and the next moment she was drowning in them. She tried in vain to push them off her but to no avail, where was he? Would he save her? Tears stung at her eyes. Would she really die like this? Drowning in feathers and petals? She cried out for help but no on answered. No one heard her. It was literally a sea of feathers and petals and she couldn't even see past them.
And then there was a hand reaching down to her through the masses of feathers and petals. She fumbled around for the hand, finally reaching it as she was pulled up. She coughed trying to regain her breath, air eventually filled her lungs providing her to breath normally once again.
Slowly, she looked upwards. "Squall..." She whispered. "Rinoa-" He put a finger to her lips. What was he doing? Why wasn't he going after Rinoa?
"It's alright." He slowly leaned in and kissed her. What the hell was he doing? That was probably the most coherent thought she got out in the span of three seconds. She wanted to tell him about how Rinoa's promise was more important than hers, that he should go after her, but she didn't. She couldn't. She was tired of being the one that was always forgotten; the one that was left behind when she loved with all her heart, with everything she had. Tears that had stung her eyes before were now rolling down her cheeks. No. This was wrong!
She shuddered as he gently brushed her tears away. And she wanted pull away, she wanted to yell at him, tell him he was stupid for letting Rinoa go, but she had waited so long for this. For him. She loved him. Truly, deeply, passionately. More than anything, more than anyone else.
Squall pulled away slowly, smoothing her hair back carefully. He was saying something but she couldn't hear any sound. What was he saying?
"Betrayer." She barely heard it, her heart skipped a beat. "Betrayer." Louder this time. Who was saying it? There was no one else there but them, and Squall wasn't saying it. She shook her head, ignoring it. "Betrayer!" No, she was fine. She was with him - he would protect her. Wouldn't he? "Betrayer!" It was even louder this time. And it occurred to her then the voices were right.
"No." She shook her head, she couldn't do this. "You can't stay here, go after her." And it broke her heart to say it, but after all, it was true wasn't it? For as much as she loved him, didn't Rinoa also if not more?
He was saying something again, and it was like someone had hit the 'mute' button. She watched as he got up, and in vain she reached for him, but he was already gone.
"Betrayer!" It was extremely loud, it hurt her ears.
"No!" She yelled, as tears rolled down her cheeks. She had let him go, she had done the right thing and yet somewhere deep down it made her angry, that she was one to let the people she cared about go and have them not come back. "It's not fair!" She choked out. "Why am I always alone?!"
"Betrayer!" The sound almost shook the ground itself and she didn't have the strength to protest. The ground shook, and she fell landing on bare ground. A dead white lily was the last thing she saw.
[ o [ o [ o
Squall watched as continued struggled against some invisible force, he moved over to her side. "Stop it." He said quietly, it was a nightmare, he knew now.
She turned again violently. Squall watched with uneasily, reaching out and putting his hands on her shoulders shaking her carefully. "Wake up, Quistis."
Yet again, she jerked away from his touch as if she had been burned. He barely heard her let out a small whimper, "Come on, wake up." She squirmed and twisted her body until she was facing him once again.
She was crying. He removed his hands from her shoulder and wiped the tears away carefully. "Please, wake up." He whispered, with one last violent jerk she went limp.
In her dream, she had died.
He couldn't breathe. Was she alive? He moved over so he above her and fumbled around for her pulse, while positioning himself to see if she was breathing. After fumbling around, he found her pulse.
"Thank Hyne." He whispered, he stared at her. What had upset her so badly? Slowly, he brought his hand up and brushed away her damp bangs. She was beautiful. He paused, when had he started to think that?
And it occurred to him, if this had been anyone else with him - would he have been thinking these thoughts? "Squall.." She whimpered softly, it was only barely audible. She had said it...lovingly?
He leaned down to hear what she said, to see if she would repeat it. Nothing. She stirred, and he shifted so he wasn't so close. "I'm sorry, Rinoa." He barely heard her whisper.
And then there was silence.