Disclaimer: Still don't own House or anything having to do with it. This is purely for my amusement and for the purposes of procrastination.

A/N: First, I feel I should say that perhaps I am not giving a certain character a fair shake. I think she is a great source of conflict for the show and adds a terrific dynamic; however, if the writers keep her around for too long (like the Spork on CSI), I'm going to be really annoyed.

Secondly, thanks for the reviews! They make me smile in a way that causes the people around me to be nervous.

OOOO

Eventually, House and the boys had decided on a course of treatment for the patient whose x-rays Cameron had delivered. House had noticed that there had been no report included with the films, though, and had had to read them himself (not that he wouldn't have anyway). That had not made him particularly happy.

"I'm all for a good bang in the middle of the day, but if it keeps him from doing his job he needs to hold off," he grouched to Wilson as they both walked into House's office. He hobbled over to his desk and tossed the folder-less pictures down. "I'm going to have to dig up a new folder for these." He chuckled. "Latex gloves. That was pretty funny. Can you imagine her face?"

Wilson just stood there. "Yeah, but I also saw her face when she walked in. And I saw her run out of there like demons from hell were chasing her. Didn't you see that?"

"Yeah. She's too sensitive. Embarrasses too easily. She needs to get over that." He sat down and dug out his Gameboy. They were in the homestretch of the work day. Time to kill some time.

"You're kidding, right?" Wilson sat in the stuffed chair across from his friend's desk. "You can't possibly tell me that you don't know what's been going on with her recently."

House, never taking his eyes off the Gameboy, replied, "Has she taken Chase's place as the resident tattle-tale? Foreman teaching her how to pick locks? Cuddy teaching her how to dress?"

"You work with her everyday, but you have no idea what has been going on?"

Wilson really wished he could be doing anything else right now. He saw three ways this could go. He could poke and prod his friend in the right direction and let him figure it out for himself; he could just flat out tell him; or he could wait to see if House would ever get a clue on his own. All the choices had him wishing for body armor, and that was just when it came to the fact that Cameron had been dating Crawford. He was going to want a Sherman tank to hide in when they got to the identity of Crawford's sex partner.

House laid down the Gameboy after hitting pause and turned to face Wilson. "Okay, now you're starting to annoy me. Why would I notice what has been going on with Cameron?"

"Oh, I don't know. Maybe because you've been noticing everything she's done, said, and worn for the past year. Maybe because you have the tiniest crush on the poor thing…"

"First of all, she would kill you for calling her that. Secondly, 'crush' is such a stupid word. And, thirdly, I am completely over that." House was starting to feel slight discomfort. He had tried very hard for the past few months to ignore any and all warmth that he felt for Cameron. He thought he had taken care of it at the restaurant on the date she conned him into, but then she had totally thrown him by telling him that she was glad he could love someone. Having Stacy around gave him a reason to push anything remotely having to do with Cameron out of his way; he'd been trying to see her only as another doctor on his team. After all, Stacy was a force to be reckoned with, one that he had never quite dealt with completely, and he hadn't wanted Cameron to be in the crossfire. He still didn't think that a relationship between him and Cameron would ever be a good idea, but he didn't see the sense in throwing her to the wolves, either.

He also didn't see the sense in explaining all this to Wilson, who, although he was House's best friend, really wouldn't understand. He'd tell House to get over Stacy and move on – like he had dozens of times before. Now, Wilson was trying to lead him down some path about Cameron and he really didn't need that.

"You're over her?" Wilson asked.

"Yep." House drawled. Maybe if he said very little, Wilson would go away.

"Great." Wilson really couldn't, in all good conscience, leave this completely hanging. He was going to make sure House knew about Cameron and Crawford for now, and then he would save the rest of the mess for later. Maybe the rumors would get back to him before Wilson had to say anything. There were times that being a coward was the best way out. Now was one of those times.

He dove in. "Have you by any chance noticed that Cameron has been inordinately happy? Noticed that whenever Chase and Foreman try to get her to do something with them on Friday nights, she already has plans?"

"No. Do you have a point?" But the point was getting a little sharper for House and was causing his discomfort to increase.

"All right Sherlock, let's see if this one hits it home for you. Have you noticed that she finds excuses and, in fact, jumps on chances to head up to radiology? That she doesn't get pissed when you send her out to pick up films when a messenger in the hospital or a member of the radiology staff could bring them to you just as easily? Did you notice that when she came in today she looked like she was either going to puke or stab someone?"

House was silent, but it was apparent to his friend that something had finally clicked.

Wilson stood up. "You know, I think I'm going to stop now and let you chew on that for a while. I realize that you've been trying hard to ignore Cameron…"

House's eyes shot up.

"Yes, I do. Everyone does. You're not as mysterious as you'd like to think. Anyway, now might be a good time for you to think about her again." He moved toward the door. "Have a lovely evening, Dr. House."

House watched Wilson walk out the door. The point was sharp and sticking in his side now. So Cameron had been dating Crawford. And Cameron had walked in on Crawford having sex with someone who was not Cameron.

Okay.

Hmmph.

House turned to the side in his chair and began twirling his cane like a baton.

One thing at a time. Cameron was dating and was – according to Wilson – happy about it. Cameron was dating Crawford, though, who House could have told her was a jerk.

If she had asked.

Which she hadn't.

He couldn't wonder why he had missed this. He knew why. He had tried very hard to miss stuff about Cameron. He should be pleased that he had been so successful.

He wasn't.

That was not something he wanted to dwell on. He might find himself leaning towards jealousy.

Which would not be a good thing.

At all.

So, time to move on to the second piece of the story: Crawford had been screwing someone when Cameron had walked in. That he could focus on. That emotion was one he was used to. Anger. He could deal with anger.

Of course, the anger was for Cameron's sake. And, of course, he wouldn't be so angry if Cameron had just walked in on any random doctor having random sex.

That would be funny.

This was not.

Protective was a vibe he had been sprinting from (metaphorically) ever since Stacy had dumped him. He was no happier about that emotion than he was about jealousy.

The cane stopped spinning. House leaned his chin on the handle, contemplating the situation.

He nodded slowly. By choosing to have sex during the work day, Crawford had, in fact, neglected to read the films.

He had been negligent.

That was something House felt comfortable getting mad about.

Now he had a reason to confront the slimy bastard. No jealousy or protectiveness here. Not a bit. Just anger towards another moron trying to make his professional life harder.

He stood up and strode purposefully toward the door; he would head to the radiology department and let Crawford have it. He'd have to decide once he got there whether the cane would be involved.

Rationalizing was such a beautiful thing.

OOOO

One time in high school, Allison Cameron had caved to peer pressure and the lure of spring and had skipped out for the day. She got caught, of course, because she was one of those people who always got caught. People thought she was some sort of goody-two-shoes because she rarely tried to take a chance when it meant crossing some ethical or rule-oriented line. The truth was, though, that she had bad karma when it came to things like that. If anyone was going to get caught being the least bit rebellious, it was going to be her.

Working for Greg House had been tough for that very reason. Well, there were other reasons, too, but it had been hard for her to deal with his constant rule bending and breaking.

Despite all of that, she sat on her couch in her apartment at 4:15 in the afternoon, a full forty-five minutes before she was supposed to even be gone from the hospital, and she had been sitting there for at least two hours. When she had left the conference room, she had not gone to check on the patient. Instead, she had found herself in her car heading towards her apartment. She had not signed out. She had not even grabbed her purse. She assumed she must have had her car keys in her lab coat pocket because here she was. In her apartment, on her couch, still in her lab coat.

She figured the karma was going to kick in at any moment. She was surprised she had not been caught for speeding or something since she didn't have her driver's license with her. Cuddy hadn't shown up to suspend her for leaving early. No nasty phone calls from House.

Just nothing.

What a perfect way to end a perfect day.

She stood up finally and took off the coat. At least she wasn't crying. That would probably come later. Probably at some really bad time. Like the first time she had to see Randy again, which would probably be right in the middle of the cafeteria.

She hope he caught some nasty social disease that left him with an oozing, itching rash.

And she hoped the little wench he was with got it too.

That would make things much better.

She contemplated all sorts of possibilities as she walked back to her room to change her clothes. She didn't want it to be a fatal disease, but something supremely uncomfortable and embarrassing would do just fine.

Maybe she should call up Mr. Infectious Diseases himself and see what he could come up with. She'd bet he'd have some good ones. He'd enjoy it too, especially if he found out whom Randy had been with in his office.

"Not if," she told herself on a sigh, "when." He would eventually find out because that was how the gossip mill ran at PPTH. She had vague memories of walking through the hospital to her car and being the recipient of all kinds of sad, pitying looks as she passed. Everybody knew. Everybody probably had known about her and Randy right from the start. She should never have kidded herself about that. Even Wilson knew. She picked up on that from his reaction to her tale. What was funny was that she had obviously been able to keep it from the three people she worked most closely with. They, clearly, had no idea what had been going on, and she sure as hell didn't want to explain it to them now.

There were three things that she didn't want to deal with at all. One was that she had been cheated on by a guy she had really liked. Two was that he had been cheating on her with another staff member. Three was that the staff member had been her boss's former live-in lover.

Whom he hadn't gotten over yet. And who was married. To a man who was still her boss's patient.

Cameron had moved to the kitchen and was rooting around in the fridge for a beer that Chase had left at her place. When she found it, she opened it, but only took a sip.

She leaned against the counter and sighed again. She supposed she should add a fourth to the list of things she didn't want to deal with: she felt sorry for House. If it were physically possible, she would have kicked her own ass for that, after all, she was the one who had just been treated horribly by the second guy in row whom she had dared show some interest in recently. And House had been the first one. She should be taping pictures to dart boards or making voodoo dolls at this point.

She let out a harsh laugh. How ironic that she had been so certain that Randy had been a good thing, and now he was the reason that she found herself worrying about House again. Bastard.

Her telephone rang, interrupting her thoughts.

The voice on the machine was Cuddy's, "Dr. Cameron, do you realize you were scheduled for the clinic this afternoon? Be in my office at eight tomorrow." Click.

Almost immediately after that, her cellphone rang. A few minutes after the ringing stopped, she dared to listen to the voice mail. This one was from House.

"You'd sure as hell better be back in here tomorrow." There was a pause. "Just had a chat with your boyfriend." Another pause. "Thought you ought to know that."

Oh, God. Her karma had definitely kicked in.