15
Jax is at her best when she likes what she's doing. Ronon watches the faces of the few 'students' she has in her massage class. They are as awed as he is. Her instructions are simple, step-by-step as in the dances she used to teach. If she aired music in the gym where she instructs these classes, Ronon would see her floating as before. He never truly noticed until now. Jax dances through life, even if she doesn't mean to.
The three nurses, one man and two women, know of Jax's infirmary visit. They witnessed her nightmares. They don't know the truth of Angela, but they understand her fears and do not judge her. Ronon believes this makes it easier for Jax to relate to them. Still, she's wearing a new mask, one specifically for interacting with others besides him. But it's a pleasant one.
Ronon wonders if this is what the true Angela was like prior to all the horror she witnessed. She smiles quite a bit, laughs easily and jokes with them as if they've been friends for years. Ronon knows it's a mask simply because the smiles do not touch her eyes—there's still the iciness in there; the lack of trust—and the laughter is far different than what she shares with him.
They've been spending much time together, even before she managed to pull him into the class as her 'massage dummy' whenever he is not off-world with Sheppard's team. She finds him after her mess hall shifts and he seeks her out whenever he returns from off-world trips.
Sheppard still teases him, says they're 'dating.' When he tells this to Jax, she giggles like…a girl…and slaps him lightly on the arm or chest. "Sheppard's such a doof." Off one of his confused looks she adds: "Silly, silly man."
People can talk but neither care for the rumors. They know the truth and that's all that matters. They are friends. But most importantly, they trust each other.
"He's just threatened by your overwhelming hottness," Ronon says back, using her words, and she laughs deep in her chest.
"If only." And then she teases him about his 'crush' on a certain Athosian woman.
Ronon would easily admit he has a physical attraction to Teyla, but he prefers denying it so that Jax can tease him more. They bicker and fight about who is more pathetic regarding their 'crushes'. One time it got so bad they ended up tussling in the gym.
Ronon easily pinned Jax to the floor only because he has size and strength on his side, but he learned a few 'tricks' about how women can subdue attackers on Earth. Some painful tricks, actually. One involving his smallest finger…the pinky. And once, Jax demonstrated how size doesn't matter…by flipping him over onto his back and placing her foot at his throat using what she called 'Judo'.
But they never truly hurt each other. He teases her and she teases back. Jax never asks to touch him now…she simply does. His arm, his knee…a hug. She doesn't flinch when he's around. He's permitted to hug her without asking. They share each other's space. Comfortable with one another.
Ronon had forgotten how wonderful being close to another person feels. Being in her presence lifts his mood, makes him feel like he belongs. Like Atlantis is home now.
She's taught him many things about Earth, though she knows he'll never see it…including how to read English. She called him a quick study, but it wasn't to different from Setia's written language. He enjoys the card games the most because she talks easily during those times. She speaks of Charlie and Lily with much love. And a place called Disneyland. Never of Ryan, though he can see her thinking of him when her shield fails on occasion.
They watch movies or TV shows on her computer…she has many of the DVD's so coveted by the Atlanteans. They are from her 'personal stash' as is her artillery; gifts from a fan, she says. There are two she watches over and over, The Cutting Edge and Ice Castles but refuses to share with him. They are her 'secret.'
"Probably porn," Sheppard said quickly one day after Ronon mentioned the secret movies though he couldn't remember the titles at the time. When Ronon asked about that, Sheppard's face turned bright red and he shook his head. "Instructional videos," he added, though without meeting Ronon's eyes. He didn't mention the conversation to Jax.
Ronon caught sight of one of the packages sent to her from Earth. It's rare when Jax looks happy. It's usually fleeting. But it does happen when she receives mail. It only comes from one person. Seems her fan is named GON. When he asked who that is, she smiled thinly and winked. "My secret admirer."
Hmm. Another secret. Ronon wonders if he'll ever know all of Jax's secrets. He hopes not. She keeps things interesting around here.
Starting class, Jax waves him over to the gurney—the tables have yet to arrive, something about red-tape—and has him lie face down as he's done many times before. He grumbles, sending deadly glares to the students, though he catches Jax's smirk. She know he enjoys a good massage. She's even managed to rope in the rest of the team as 'human props', as McKay calls them.
The scientist grumbles at much as Ronon about being forced into servitude, but Ronon has never seen McKay so gleeful than when it's his turn to take part. Neither Sheppard nor Teyla bother bemoaning the class. They clearly enjoy the relaxation offered by Jax's delicate but firm touch. Ronon even caught Sheppard napping through a massage one time.
She's drawing on his back again with her ink pen. It tickles and he enjoys it more than he should. She's pointing out specific muscles in the back, always complementing Ronon as being an 'exquisite specimen' or teaching tool.
The others each take a section as she stands aside, arms crossed, eyes watching. He catches her gaze and snarls at her. She simply grins then goes back to watching her students work.
The others have limited skills, but they are learning. The prize comes after the class is over and Jax gives him a full body massage from head to toe as payment for his time. Those are tough to stay alert through and he's given up trying. Even when he dreams of Nally, he manages to stay calm and relaxed. Jax has done that for him. Given him the chance to remember…in peace.
He wonders if he'll be able to repay her for it.
"I got some mail today," she says softly as she works her fingers into his neck. "From my secret admirer." Ronon moans, letting her know he's listening. "Wanna watch some of it with me tonight after I get out of the mess?"
"Have to go off-world tomorrow."
"C'mon, Ronon…it's not like you need a lot of sleep." He turns his head and sees her grinning at him. "It'll be short. I think the first episode is only forty minutes or something."
"Episode?"
"It's an old TV show. One of my favorites as a kid."
Something she liked as a child? Now he's intrigued. "Okay. But not too late."
"Deal." She finishes up and wipes the gel from her hands. "See you in five hours."
Ronon nods. He waits for her to leave before rising from the table and removing the towel from around his waist so he can get dressed. He learned early on that his 'lack of modesty' is a deterent from her ability to teach the class. She says even the male student gets distracted, for some reason she won't explain. So, she requires him to be covered in that 'strategic' area until everyone leaves, including her.
The same rule clearly applies to Teyla, McKay and Sheppard, though Ronon finds it amusing that when Sheppard is in the towel, Jax is reluctant to leave so quickly. And Sheppard is the one to blush at times, not Jax.
He meets her in her room near midnight. She's already showered and dressed for bed in her usual T-shirt and shorts. There's a box of cereal on the desk, her 'heart smart' snack food of choice and the large screen laptop set up on the chair at the foot of the bed.
They lean against the wall with pillows behind them. The bed is slim, but somehow they manage to fit comfortably, though they tend to overlap, with his arm behind her and Jax's head against his chest.
The show starts and Ronon sees the title explode onto the screen. McGyver. Jax giggles and the tinest tremor passes through her into him. "I can't believe he sent this to me. Soweeet!"
Now Ronon wants to know more about this secret admirer. What are his intentions toward Jax? How does he know so much about her? How does he make her happy even for a brief instance when she gets one of his packages.
If the mail came from Charlie, she would have told him instantly. But this person she keeps to herself, making Ronon feel uneasy. Still, the program is intriguing and he finds the lingering thoughts about Jax's admirer diminish as the images progress. The 'hero' of this show is particularly inventive.
Jax makes several remarks while they watch, but Ronon does not understand them. More 'slang' she says. "Doesn't Mac remind you of Sheppard?"
Ronon wrinkles his brows, considering the thought. "Not really. They look very different."
She taps his chest gently. "I know that. But he's just so….SO!" She looks up at him, her tired eyes full of joy he's never seen before. "You're a guy…you'll never understand." With a "Please" she gets him to watch one more episode only to have her fall asleep half way through.
Ronon slips out from under her and turns off the laptop, setting it on the desk. He sees the package the gift came in on the floor near the bed. Ronon looks at Jax, sleeping fitfully as usual. He knows he should go…leave it her secret. But he's wary of this admirer. What if he suddenly hurts Jax's feelings. Ronon cannot permit that. He must know. He picks up the box and checks the outside label. It simply states:
To: Maggie Jackson, SGA
From: GON
Priority Mail.
CONFIDENTIAL.
He looks inside, finding a folded piece of paper and opens it. Though he feels slightly guilty, Ronon truly wants to know who this person is, so he reads the note.
Angie,
Got your message. Trust Weir. You're secret's safe. C & L are expecting. Big smiles.
Be happy.
Love Jack.
Ronon feels the familiar protectiveness surge as he reads the last part. Love? Who is this Jack. Why has she not mentioned him before? Ronon will have to insist she tells him.
He watches her struggle in sleep, grumbling and restless as usual. Without the stims to keep her awake, she now works herself into exhaustion so she can rest for a few hours. She once mentioned that the best night of sleep she's had in eight years was after they stopped the Wraith from taking the city. She'd been too tired to dream.
He drops the note back in the package and sets the box in its original place by the bed. Returning to Jax's side, Ronon lifts her easily enough without waking her, slides his arm behind her once again and rests her head against his chest. He wraps his other arm around her as she struggles in her dreams and whispers into her ear that she's not alone.