The Shimotos Boarding School

Disclaimer: Why would I be writing a FAN fiction if I was Rumiko?

Chapter Ten: How to Deal

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Kagome tilted her head to the left to glance at Inuyasha.

His normally cocky and bright eyes were dark and full of worry. His eyebrows where scrunched together and that accompanied the deep frown on his lips. Everyone who had gone searching for Kagome was sitting in the main living room of Yasha-tachi's room.

The room felt so silent you could cut it with a knife.

Kikyo sat next to Kagome, staring at her cut and bruised hands. She had just finished telling everyone, including Nona, Arashi, Rin, Sesshoumaru, Sango, Miroku, and Inuyasha the story of what happened to Kagome.

Both Sango's face, and Rin's, were pail. Nona looked like she was ready to slit someone's throat, and Arashi looked thoughtful. Miroku had a similar deep from to Inuyasha's, well Sesshoumaru looked to be only worried about how pail Rin was.

Kagome was almost about to stand up and walk out of the room, but she suddenly heard Sango clearing her throat. All eyes led to her, and Sango now looked like she was about to cry. A trait that really did not suit her at all.

"I'm sorry Kikyo." She told them, and was surprised to see not only Kikyo give her a gentle smile of thanks, but Kagome. Kagome's eyes told Sango that she was glad that Sango had ended that awkward silence.

"I'm glad that you don't dislike me as much, despite the circumstances." Kikyo's mellow voice told them, her eyes once again on her hands and dark with though.

A slight whimper came out of Rin and she quickly buried her face into Sesshoumaru's chest to sob. Kagome felt such an urge to comfort her, but didn't have the heart to stand up. She didn't have the heart to comfort her because at that moment, the only thing she needed was to be comforted herself...

"How could anybody be so cruel!" Came out choked sobs. Sesshoumaru clutched her tighter to him, but did not shush her. He just patted her back. "Rin-Chan..." He whispered, "That guy, Naraku, probably had been abused to." Rin quieted down to hear what Sesshoumaru had to tell her. "Now that he is older, he feels the need to trap others... just as he was trapped. Give pain to others, probably worse than what he, himself received."

Kagome felt a ball in her throat and started trembling.

'Just the same as how I treated Kikyo...' She though, glancing at Kikyo. 'I was cruel to her, knowing it was the same was I was treated... First by that bastard father of mine, then by my classmates, then by Akira... over and over.'

A tear ran down her cheek but was left unnoticed. 'I'm the same as Naraku.'

Not being able to sit there anymore, Kagome let out a choked sob of her own before standing up and flying to her room. She knew that all eyes were on her and remembered something that Akira had once told her...

'Watch as all eyes go upon you, Kagome. They are judging you as you stand there, thinking to yourself 'I'll never be good enough for them. It's disgusting...'

Slamming the door to her joint room with Sango, she felt as if she was plunging back into the darkness. Back into the world she lived in not only when she was a little girl, sobbing at the bruises her father gave, but as a teenager, whimpering at the bruises her boyfriend gave her.

XXX

Inuyasha watched as Kagome ran to her room and slammed the door shut. He was already standing to go and comfort her but Kikyo's voice stopped him.

"don't." She told him softly, not looking at him. "Why not!" He snarled at her, his eyes narrow slits.

"She's in chaos." Rin's voice came this time, a little hoarse from her recent crying. Sesshoumaru looked down at her and lifted an eyebrow, but said nothing.

"Chaos?" Sango's voice echoed, a little confused.

"She told me that she went through something similar to what happened to day. Only it was much worse. As we ran from those fucking rosebushes, her eyes were filled with not only hate, but fear. It didn't seem she was seeing Naraku when she ran, but someone else." Kikyo explained, licking her lips afterward.

"Kagome is having a mental breakdown..." Rin continued softly.

"She doesn't know how to handle something like this happening... again." Kikyo finished. Her and Rin looked at one another and smiled slightly. They both understood what Kagome was feeling because they had both been through it. Rin and Kikyo were more alike than Nona and Kagome.

"If I were you, I would leave Kagome alone for a while." Nona's voice came, making everyone look at her. She had been silent for most of the conversation. "Discussing thing's like your past can be so painful." Miroku and Sango nodded in unison as Inuyasha looked back towards Kagome's door. He remembered silently the conversation they had when Kikyo had walked into the class that day...

: "Do you remember yesterday, when she had walked into class looking like shit? How she had black circles under her eyes and bruises on her arms, her skin was completely red and her hair was all fucked up... I kind of think I know what's going on..." Kagome told him really softly.

Inuyasha's eyes widened and he looked over at her.

"How?" He asked, bewildered.

Kagome's eyes darkened and she lowered her head. Her bangs covered her face and she was staring at her arms. Rubbing her right hand over her left arm, she shivered and felt a solitary tear role down her cheek.

"Because it happened to me as well." She whispered, "And I was just the same way Kikyo is right now. She looks so lost and confused.":

Inuyasha felt himself tremble, just as Kagome had. He wasn't afraid for her because she was his friend. He was terrified for her because he was beginning to thing she may be more than that.

XXX

Kagome POV

I open my eyes and am surprised to see my old room. No longer is it the cheerful painting Sango did of all of us together but dark gray walls. Posters and little indents on the walls are quite visible and in my memory I can still even see where certain stains on the ugly blue carpet were.

I look to the door and see two cruel and cold blue eyes staring at me. The bastard is leaning against my old dresser with it's broken lava lamp and old alarm clock. He is smiling at me, though I can see hate not only filling his eyes, but aura.

I feel my body move as if it is not my own, and I walk towards him. Suddenly, I'm not even in that body... I'm looking on as he takes my hand and kisses me.

"Watch out!" I try to yell, knowing what exactly happens next, and it does. He takes a knife out and pierces my right shoulder. I can see myself trying to scream but he covers my mouth.

Breathing on my face I can clearly smell the beer on his breath. I can still hear the words he whispers in my ear as he stabs me yet again.

"So you have been fucking around, have you slut."

I scream so loud and the door burst open. I look over and it is Inuyasha. He is glaring at Akira and trying to get to me. I see him grab me, and tears fill my eyes as he slaps me as well.

They both take turns kicking me... punching me... my body is so bruised, crushed with pain. I feel my clothes being peeled off just like that night... I can still feel Akira's hands touching my bare skin as he tries to force himself on me. I use all of my strength to hold him back, but he is so much stronger than me.

I grope my finger's around, trying to find something to hit him with. I grasp my old stereo, just as I did that night. I almost feel free, but in the same breath I was reached freedom, I was bound yet again. I feel another set of hands on me. Inuyasha's normally warm and loving amber eyes are staring at me with the same, maybe more hatred as Akira's used to.

"Please don't..." I whisper.

He smiles at me darkly, before slapping me and forcing himself into me. I scream so loud... but nobody comes. He hurts so bad, pumping into me with forcefulness. I feel hot tears run down my cheeks and the faint smell of blood.

"You fat bitch! Your so dumb! Crying over everything! No wonder your father fucking beat you before he left, and why your mother hates you. No wonder Akira beat you shitless! It's because you are getting what you fucking had coming! Your so pathetic, bastard child. You should have never been born!" The only insults Akira used to give me are coming from my beloved Inuyasha's mouth.

My heart crushes. I have been rejected yet again by someone I love. I watch as Sango walks into the room her eyes wide and full of fear. A uninjured Akira pounces on top of her.

I see her screaming, screaming, screaming. I feel burning on my body. Akira is laughing, Inuyasha is scratching my flesh, and I hear him chanting "Fat, fat, fat..." in my ears.

Nobody saves me... nobody saves me...

XXX My eyes dart open and I pull my body up quickly. I look around and associate myself with my normal room in the boarding school. I can faintly hear Sango's snores from the best beside mine but I ignore them and put my head in my hands.

Shutting my eyes tightly I try to rid the nightmare from my eyes.

I can't.

Getting up I walk out of the room and into the kitchen, filling a glass of water and drinking only a few sips before pouring it out. I feel my legs give under me and soon find I am on the kitchen floor.

I look at my wrists and see the scars that I used to give myself years back when my mother was yelling at me. It was so long ago and the scars are faded but they are still there.

I sit up and take one of the knives out of our little bowl that we keep them in. I stare at it and dully wonder if I will regret cutting myself later.

I don't follow my thoughts though and glide the blade and a swift, quick movement. I intertwine my thoughts with the pain, and over the course of the next 4 hours, I feel myself drift in and out of sleep.

At about 6:20 I get up, wipe off the knife and look out the window. The sun is coming over the hill that the boarding school is on, and I can see a few cars go up and down the highway. I put a dishrag over the cut, not really caring that it stars at the dip of my wrist and travels to my elbow. I take the knife with me to my room.

When I get to my room I walk over to my bed, hiding the knife under a stack of dirty clothes on my nightstand. I idly think that the sheets are cold again, but they soon warm up. I stay up long enough to tell Sango that I will be skipping classes. I know that she wont ask any questions. After all that business with Kikyo, I think Sango would be more shocked it I actually went to school. I hear her leave the room.

I am so tired, but terrified at the aspect of going to sleep. I know Inuyasha will come into the room in a little while, but for once I really don't want to see him. I don't want to see the pitied look in his beautiful eyes.

I don't want to have to look at him after that nightmare. When he does come in I tell him to please leave me alone. I tell him that we will talk after classes, and to please not worry.

I cut myself 7 more times before I finally drift off to sleep around noon, still hearing Kikyo's screams from the night before, and Dream-Inuyasha chanting;

"Fat. Fat. Fat."

XXX

Next Chapter: Cloud Watching