Okay. I survived high school. Yay me.
Thank you so much, everyone who offered to answer questions for my English assignment. I only emailed three people, because any more than that and I'd have been over my stupid word limit. I don't know what I got on the assignment (because my teacher never gave them back to us), but thanks heaps to you for offering.
Chapter is dedicated to NayNymic, the crazy ladies, and Miss Lesley for answering my questions so well and really helping me with the essay.
Guys, I am really sorry, but if I want to get this posted I'm not going to have time for many replies.
Thanks so much though!
~Silver Sparklze (You tied Ginny up with purple fairy floss? How does that work? I haven't ever seen it in purple!)
~Obsessed4
~Sailor Grape
~TanisaFyre
~I Am The Bunny Slayer
~Hayley
~LoonyLoopyLisa
~Noriko M. Chijinu
~Chronicles Bailey
~Web Walker
~krazymelmo5385
~fjb
~Siderius Cimmerii
~NayNymic
~willow-nymph
~Lyla Snape
~Clairchen
~MedNar
~The It (I would be honoured to be captured by you. Can I get some more details on this captured thing though? Sounds fun)
~Dea Liberty
~Dragenphly
~cRazy-Girl-3000 (gulps...I don't particularly want to get reacquainted with the baseball bats...)
~Yana5
~SmileyYaoiChick
~rose-dragon (Thank you SO much for telling me about the hair thing, I'm going to change that right away. I had no idea!)
~The Chaotic Ones
~Weasley Wonders (Glad SOMEONE liked the cliffie!)
~insanechildfanfic
Again, thanks so much! I really appreciate it!
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Harry, Seamus, And The Master Plan
By SilverWolf7007
Chapter Eighteen ~ Interesting Conversations, Revelations, Insane Genius, And Jumping Off Bricks
Parvati and Neville had left the Common Room not long after Harry and Seamus, deciding to visit Hagrid (or, more accurately, Parvati had dragged Neville down there to see the hippogriffs again).
"I still don't see what's so great about hippogriffs, Ti."
She rolled her eyes. "Well for starters Nev, they're really cute. And elegant. Plus, they're really smart." They had reached the Great Hall by now. "But the main reason that we're going down there is so we can discuss what's been going on with everyone else, without said everyone else being there to overhear us."
Neville sighed. He should have expected that. Parvati had an often insatiable curiosity. He'd been wondering why she hadn't brought this up before. Lack of privacy, no doubt.
When they reached Hagrid's hut, they discovered that the half-giant wasn't there, but Parvati headed on to the hippogriffs paddock. They leaned on the fence, just watching them as they talked.
Parvati quickly took charge. "What do we know?"
Neville raised an eyebrow. "Not that much. Ron, 'Mione, Dean and Lav are using the Five to find out whether Harry and Seamus are a couple."
"Harry had help with that spell he did on Snape this morning," Parvati told him.
"What, really? From who, Ti?"
"None other than Draco Malfoy."
Neville's jaw dropped. "Oh you have GOT to be kidding me!"
She shook her head. "Nope. And I saw Seamus, Blaise Zabini, as well as Jason and Maddy Nott outside the library last night. And I know for a fact that Harry was in there. WITH Malfoy."
"Plus all the time that Harry and Seamus have been spending with Professor Lupin. Something's going on there. And I think they were the ones who locked Ron and 'Mione in the DADA classroom."
"Really? Wow, this is really complicated, Nev."
"You have no idea. Somehow, Owen Caudwell and Orla Quirke are involved in this too."
"Owen in Hufflepuff and Orla in Ravenclaw? The third years who are friends with some of the Five?"
"Yup. Ti, from what I've heard, Orla and Owen have been telling people things about Seamus and Harry, such as how Harry is supposedly thinking of asking Lisa Turpin out."
"You think Harry and Seamus are using them to throw the Five off the scent?" He nodded. "But then how did they even find out?!"
"Probably Maddy Nott. She's like their Slytherin spy. She'd have heard Emma and Malcolm discussing it, although I'd have thought they'd have been more careful." Neville sighed. "You know what, Ti?"
"What?"
"I reckon we should just keep our heads down on this one. Pay attention, but try not to get involved. The way Seamus and Harry have been acting, I think they're the ones to watch. They're up to something, and I don't think that it's really worth us getting involved."
"But Nev........."
"No buts. Let's just be careful. Seamus plotting is bad enough, but Harry.........well. After taking over the prankster mantle, he's been more unpredictable than before."
"You're right. This might be innocent drama worthy of a cheap soap opera, or it might have something to do with another one of his world-saving plans."
"Or worse. It might be a Incident-worthy catastrophe."
Parvati shuddered. "And that would be very, very bad."
***************************************************
Having escaped from the Common Room, Harry had headed towards the dungeons, hoping to find Draco and drag him off to see Remus.
Unfortunately, finding the Slytherin had proved somewhat more difficult than he'd thought it would be, and he had spent the past half an hour on a Malfoy-hunt, searching as much of the castle as he thought Draco was likely to be in.
Harry went back in the direction of the dungeons, deciding that if he didn't find Draco this time, then he'd just go to Remus by himself.
Not watching where he was going, Harry managed to run headlong into someone not too far from the Potions classroom.
"Watch where you're go - oh. It's you."
Harry raised an eyebrow. "You don't seem pleased to see me. I'm hurt Sevvie, really."
The Potions Master's left eye twitched. "Haven't I told you not to call me that?"
"Actually, it was Remus you were telling, not me. And I was all the way on the other side of the room and probably wasn't listening."
"You are a brat, Harry. Now tell me what you're doing in my dungeons or I'll give you detention and take several thousand points from Gryffindor. Just because I don't like you."
"Aw, you know you love me Sevvie." Snape glared. "Okay, okay. I was looking for Draco."
"As in, Draco 'your hated rival' Malfoy?"
Harry grinned. "Yes, that would be the one. I was hoping to talk to him about our Care of Magical Creatures assignment before I have to visit Remus."
"You're on his side, then?"
"Duh. He asked first. Have you seen Draco?"
"Not recently."
"Ah. Too bad, really." He gave the Potions Master a shrewd look. "And before I continue my search, you are going to tell me why you were rushing along the hallway so fast you managed to run into a student who was walking quite slowly."
"Dumbledore called a meeting. If it's anything important, I'll find you and tell you later."
"So Remus won't be there when I go to find him anyway."
"I'm afraid not."
Harry shrugged. "Oh well. I can still find Draco. And then maybe we can harass Blaise and Seamus!" he exclaimed brightly.
Snape rolled his eyes. "As long as you leave most of the castle standing, I don't particularly care what you do."
"All right!"
"Five points from Gryffindor for encouraging a teacher to ignore misbehaviour."
"And yet somehow, that doesn't surprise me. I just hope no one asks what I lost those points for."
"If anyone asks, tell them it was for pranking me."
Harry's eyes widened innocently. "Me? Why Sevvie, I'm shocked! I'd never do such a thing!"
Slowly, Snape raised an eyebrow.
"Oh okay, so maybe I would. But that doesn't mean that I did!"
"Harry. I am not an idiot. Even if you weren't the only one, at the very least you helped with that prank. It just stinks of Harry Potter. And you know I don't appreciate being pranked." He frowned in consideration. "In fact, let's make that another twenty-five points from Gryffindor. That makes a nice round thirty. You can blame Remus for that."
"You, Severus Snape, are a mean bully."
He blinked. "Well, yes. But you knew that."
"Very true. You'd better get to that meeting you're going to be late for."
Snape looked at his watch, cursed, and headed for Dumbledore's office, not even glancing at Harry.
Harry rolled his eyes exasperatedly. "Gee, bye? That man is annoying."
Before he reached the end of the hallway, Snape turned sharply and stared at Harry.
"What?"
"Why do you have silver hair?" he asked wearily.
Harry laughed. "Dean did it."
The head of Slytherin shook his head slowly. "And here I have proof that the entirety of Gryffindor house are utterly insane." He turned on his heel and left.
Harry sighed. "Well that's not a very nice thing to say. Even if it is fairly true."
"Talking to yourself, Harry? Isn't that the first sign of madness?"
He turned and grinned at Maddy. "Sure is. And I've never denied being mad. In fact, I'm fairly sure I am."
She sighed. "You're impossible, Harry. Now, what ARE you doing in Slytherin territory? Trying to get yourself eaten?"
"Eaten?"
"Oh yes, Slytherins have been known to eat unwary Gryffindors who travel unwittingly into their midst."
"Huh. Imagine that. All these years as a Gryffindor, and yet I've never been eaten. And I come down here a lot."
"You're just lucky then. So, why are you here?"
"Honestly? I'm looking for Draco. Have you seen him?"
Maddy nodded. "He's in the Common Room. I can send him out, if you like."
"Thanks Maddy, that'd be great."
They walked in silence to the entrance to the Slytherin Common Room. When they reached it, Harry stood back as Maddy whispered the password and stepped in. Before it closed, she spoke. "See you later Harry. And have fun!"
Harry rolled his eyes and waited.
**************************************************
Minerva stared at Remus in shock. "Oh my."
He nodded, smiling cheerfully. "A very amusing tale, really, if you ignore all the rule breaking going on for this all to take place."
"Oh I'm ignoring all right. What on earth possessed Harry and Seamus to go to such great lengths simply to date a couple of Slytherins?"
Remus laughed and shrugged. "I can honestly say I haven't a clue. But they have been trying to set Ron and Hermione up for a long time, so perhaps this is just another excuse to work really hard at it. And I think Seamus has liked Blaise for a while."
"I can't believe I've been missing all of this! Promise me you'll tell me what's happening from now on?"
"Of course. Now you know, it would be simply cruel to deny you. After all, curiosity killed the cat, and I'm quite aware of your Animagus form."
Minerva indulged in behaviour not normally associated with Gryffindor's head of house, and poked her tongue out at the werewolf. "You are an impudent brat, Remus Lupin."
He grinned. "You have told me so on numerous occasions, so it must be true."
Both of them jumped as a letter appeared on Remus's desk. He recovered and picked it up, opening it and beginning to read.
'Remus,
There is to be a meeting of some importance. Come to my office immediately.
Albus'
He passed the note to Minerva as a second appeared in her lap, having failed to reach her in her office.
She sighed. "We'd best go."
"Yes," he said, standing up with a sigh. "And just when I was in such a good mood."
"As was I. And now, for all we know, someone's been killed."
Remus went pale. "Siri and Sam were spying on the Death Eaters."
Minerva's eyes widened, but she shook her head. "I'm sure they're fine, Remus. No need to worry. Albus has probably just decided to have another Yule Ball."
He nodded, but Minerva could still see the worry in his eyes.
*****************************************************
Seamus sighed as he stepped into the library. At least now he and Ron weren't the only ones with weird hair colours. Now if only they could get Hermione and Lavender as well.........
Blaise was already sitting at a table with his books out, and was writing something on a ratty looking piece of parchment.
"Hey," he said as he sat down.
The Slytherin looked up as Seamus began taking out his own books. "Hi. I was just writing down an idea I had for pranking Snape." He passed it to him. "What do you think?"
Seamus read it over about five times, before looking up and staring wide- eyed at the dark haired teen. "This, Blaise Zabini, is utter insane genius worthy of Harry himself."
Blaise raised an eyebrow. "And I'm just going to assume that was a compliment."
"It was. Absolutely. Harry's going to love it, and so is Remus as far as I can tell."
"Good. Now, let's get to this Transfiguration."
"Yeah. Last thing we need is to fail and have Professor Minnie giving detentions."
"Professor Minnie???"
Seamus grinned. "Long story. I'll tell it to you some time. When we don't have an assignment from her."
Blaise nodded and gave him a smile, and they both got to work.
******************************************************
The first thing that Sirius noticed was that he had a headache. The second thing he noticed was that someone was shaking him. He groaned.
"Sirius! C'mon Siri, wake up!"
He opened his eyes. "Sam?"
"Yes. Of course it's me. Who else was captured by Death Eaters with you?"
"Ummm........."
"No one, moron. We're here alone, and we have no way to contact Dumbledore. They don't know we're here."
Sirius's eyes widened. "As in, we could be here long enough to be killed and no one would even know anything was wrong?"
Sam nodded. "Pretty much. Its too bad Sev was discovered, or he'd have found a way to get us out."
Sirius was silent, processing that thought. "I don't like your husband, but I can't help but feel the same way right now."
She smiled. "I thought you'd see it my way."
"So any ideas on how we're getting out of here?"
"You're not," a familiar voice said from outside the cell they were in. "You're both going to be questioned, and then you're going to die."
Sam sighed. "Avery, go jump off a brick."
Sirius blinked. "And what good is that going to do?"
His companion smiled. "Well, I forgot to mention that said brick is on the very top of a high tower."
"Ahhh. That all makes so much more sense now."
"Would you two shut up in there?!"
"Leave them be, Avery," a second voice said lazily. "Let them talk if it makes them feel better. They might let something slip."
Sam's left eye twitched, something she'd picked up from Severus. "I hate you."
"Good!" the second man said cheerfully. "Because I hate you too!"
"You're sounding oddly cheerful, Lucius. Want to share the good news?" Sirius asked mockingly.
"Why yes I do actually. You see, Black, I have earned the privilege of extracting information from you two. And I get to do it with no one else in the room."
Sam and Sirius glanced at each other, but neither spoke.
"I'd be scared too, if I were you," Avery commented.
"Shut up, Avery."
The blond man snorted, and they heard him walking away. "Have fun, Lucius," he called as he went.
Lucius smirked as he stepped into the cell. "I assure you I will," he replied.
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BELLATRIX: Why don't I get to torture Sirius and Sam if I'm Voldemort's most loyal Death Eater?
LUCIUS: Because in this fic, so far you're still in Azkaban.
BELLATRIX: SW, can I get out?
SW: Maybe. We'll have to see. I'm not really planning an Azkaban break-out. Yet.
SIRIUS: (Drowning in sarcasm) Oh yes, because letting the Bitch out of prison is SUCH a good idea.
TOM: She never said she WAS going to do it.
VOLDEMORT: Although I think she should.
SYLVAN: You don't count.
LUCIUS: She's done another cliffhanger again.
SYLVAN: Yeah, I know. (Looks pointedly at Remus) Would someone do something about that?
REMUS: And what do you expect ME to do?
BELLATRIX: (Hopefully) Kill her off?
SW: Hey! I could just kill YOU off, you know!
TOM: She could, too. She could make you suicide in your Azkaban cell.
BELLATRIX: (Sulks)
SAM: I kinda agree with Bellatrix, though.
SIRIUS: Yeah. The Bitch did kill me, but she's got the right idea.
LUCIUS: I'd shut up if I were you two. She could just make me torture and kill you both.
SW: Damn straight! I'm the author here, I have the power! Mwahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!
EVERYONE: (Backing away slowly)
MADDY: My god, things are getting weird around here.
BLAISE: (Nods) Let's go.
MADDY & BLAISE: (Vanish)
SW: Why were they here?
LUCIUS: (Moves forward again) I don't know.
SYLVAN: (Still backing) Just relieving the comic stress, I think.
SW: Oh.
SIRIUS & SAM: I wanna be FREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
DUMBLEDORE: I want to hold my meeting and give out lemon drops to certain dour Potions Masters!
SEVERUS: I want the damned meeting to be over, and my wife to be free, and to know exactly WHY I'm on first name terms with HARRY POTTER!!!!!
REMUS: I want chocolate.
ALL: (Stare at Remus)
REMUS: What?
SW: (Rolls eyes) Whatever.
Okay despite the fact that I took forever to update, I hope you can all find it in your hearts to forgive me.
In the next chapter, I will do my best to adhere to at least SOME of the above wishes. Like Remus's chocolate.
REMUS: Yay!
Please review!
~SW
Thank you so much, everyone who offered to answer questions for my English assignment. I only emailed three people, because any more than that and I'd have been over my stupid word limit. I don't know what I got on the assignment (because my teacher never gave them back to us), but thanks heaps to you for offering.
Chapter is dedicated to NayNymic, the crazy ladies, and Miss Lesley for answering my questions so well and really helping me with the essay.
Guys, I am really sorry, but if I want to get this posted I'm not going to have time for many replies.
Thanks so much though!
~Silver Sparklze (You tied Ginny up with purple fairy floss? How does that work? I haven't ever seen it in purple!)
~Obsessed4
~Sailor Grape
~TanisaFyre
~I Am The Bunny Slayer
~Hayley
~LoonyLoopyLisa
~Noriko M. Chijinu
~Chronicles Bailey
~Web Walker
~krazymelmo5385
~fjb
~Siderius Cimmerii
~NayNymic
~willow-nymph
~Lyla Snape
~Clairchen
~MedNar
~The It (I would be honoured to be captured by you. Can I get some more details on this captured thing though? Sounds fun)
~Dea Liberty
~Dragenphly
~cRazy-Girl-3000 (gulps...I don't particularly want to get reacquainted with the baseball bats...)
~Yana5
~SmileyYaoiChick
~rose-dragon (Thank you SO much for telling me about the hair thing, I'm going to change that right away. I had no idea!)
~The Chaotic Ones
~Weasley Wonders (Glad SOMEONE liked the cliffie!)
~insanechildfanfic
Again, thanks so much! I really appreciate it!
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Harry, Seamus, And The Master Plan
By SilverWolf7007
Chapter Eighteen ~ Interesting Conversations, Revelations, Insane Genius, And Jumping Off Bricks
Parvati and Neville had left the Common Room not long after Harry and Seamus, deciding to visit Hagrid (or, more accurately, Parvati had dragged Neville down there to see the hippogriffs again).
"I still don't see what's so great about hippogriffs, Ti."
She rolled her eyes. "Well for starters Nev, they're really cute. And elegant. Plus, they're really smart." They had reached the Great Hall by now. "But the main reason that we're going down there is so we can discuss what's been going on with everyone else, without said everyone else being there to overhear us."
Neville sighed. He should have expected that. Parvati had an often insatiable curiosity. He'd been wondering why she hadn't brought this up before. Lack of privacy, no doubt.
When they reached Hagrid's hut, they discovered that the half-giant wasn't there, but Parvati headed on to the hippogriffs paddock. They leaned on the fence, just watching them as they talked.
Parvati quickly took charge. "What do we know?"
Neville raised an eyebrow. "Not that much. Ron, 'Mione, Dean and Lav are using the Five to find out whether Harry and Seamus are a couple."
"Harry had help with that spell he did on Snape this morning," Parvati told him.
"What, really? From who, Ti?"
"None other than Draco Malfoy."
Neville's jaw dropped. "Oh you have GOT to be kidding me!"
She shook her head. "Nope. And I saw Seamus, Blaise Zabini, as well as Jason and Maddy Nott outside the library last night. And I know for a fact that Harry was in there. WITH Malfoy."
"Plus all the time that Harry and Seamus have been spending with Professor Lupin. Something's going on there. And I think they were the ones who locked Ron and 'Mione in the DADA classroom."
"Really? Wow, this is really complicated, Nev."
"You have no idea. Somehow, Owen Caudwell and Orla Quirke are involved in this too."
"Owen in Hufflepuff and Orla in Ravenclaw? The third years who are friends with some of the Five?"
"Yup. Ti, from what I've heard, Orla and Owen have been telling people things about Seamus and Harry, such as how Harry is supposedly thinking of asking Lisa Turpin out."
"You think Harry and Seamus are using them to throw the Five off the scent?" He nodded. "But then how did they even find out?!"
"Probably Maddy Nott. She's like their Slytherin spy. She'd have heard Emma and Malcolm discussing it, although I'd have thought they'd have been more careful." Neville sighed. "You know what, Ti?"
"What?"
"I reckon we should just keep our heads down on this one. Pay attention, but try not to get involved. The way Seamus and Harry have been acting, I think they're the ones to watch. They're up to something, and I don't think that it's really worth us getting involved."
"But Nev........."
"No buts. Let's just be careful. Seamus plotting is bad enough, but Harry.........well. After taking over the prankster mantle, he's been more unpredictable than before."
"You're right. This might be innocent drama worthy of a cheap soap opera, or it might have something to do with another one of his world-saving plans."
"Or worse. It might be a Incident-worthy catastrophe."
Parvati shuddered. "And that would be very, very bad."
***************************************************
Having escaped from the Common Room, Harry had headed towards the dungeons, hoping to find Draco and drag him off to see Remus.
Unfortunately, finding the Slytherin had proved somewhat more difficult than he'd thought it would be, and he had spent the past half an hour on a Malfoy-hunt, searching as much of the castle as he thought Draco was likely to be in.
Harry went back in the direction of the dungeons, deciding that if he didn't find Draco this time, then he'd just go to Remus by himself.
Not watching where he was going, Harry managed to run headlong into someone not too far from the Potions classroom.
"Watch where you're go - oh. It's you."
Harry raised an eyebrow. "You don't seem pleased to see me. I'm hurt Sevvie, really."
The Potions Master's left eye twitched. "Haven't I told you not to call me that?"
"Actually, it was Remus you were telling, not me. And I was all the way on the other side of the room and probably wasn't listening."
"You are a brat, Harry. Now tell me what you're doing in my dungeons or I'll give you detention and take several thousand points from Gryffindor. Just because I don't like you."
"Aw, you know you love me Sevvie." Snape glared. "Okay, okay. I was looking for Draco."
"As in, Draco 'your hated rival' Malfoy?"
Harry grinned. "Yes, that would be the one. I was hoping to talk to him about our Care of Magical Creatures assignment before I have to visit Remus."
"You're on his side, then?"
"Duh. He asked first. Have you seen Draco?"
"Not recently."
"Ah. Too bad, really." He gave the Potions Master a shrewd look. "And before I continue my search, you are going to tell me why you were rushing along the hallway so fast you managed to run into a student who was walking quite slowly."
"Dumbledore called a meeting. If it's anything important, I'll find you and tell you later."
"So Remus won't be there when I go to find him anyway."
"I'm afraid not."
Harry shrugged. "Oh well. I can still find Draco. And then maybe we can harass Blaise and Seamus!" he exclaimed brightly.
Snape rolled his eyes. "As long as you leave most of the castle standing, I don't particularly care what you do."
"All right!"
"Five points from Gryffindor for encouraging a teacher to ignore misbehaviour."
"And yet somehow, that doesn't surprise me. I just hope no one asks what I lost those points for."
"If anyone asks, tell them it was for pranking me."
Harry's eyes widened innocently. "Me? Why Sevvie, I'm shocked! I'd never do such a thing!"
Slowly, Snape raised an eyebrow.
"Oh okay, so maybe I would. But that doesn't mean that I did!"
"Harry. I am not an idiot. Even if you weren't the only one, at the very least you helped with that prank. It just stinks of Harry Potter. And you know I don't appreciate being pranked." He frowned in consideration. "In fact, let's make that another twenty-five points from Gryffindor. That makes a nice round thirty. You can blame Remus for that."
"You, Severus Snape, are a mean bully."
He blinked. "Well, yes. But you knew that."
"Very true. You'd better get to that meeting you're going to be late for."
Snape looked at his watch, cursed, and headed for Dumbledore's office, not even glancing at Harry.
Harry rolled his eyes exasperatedly. "Gee, bye? That man is annoying."
Before he reached the end of the hallway, Snape turned sharply and stared at Harry.
"What?"
"Why do you have silver hair?" he asked wearily.
Harry laughed. "Dean did it."
The head of Slytherin shook his head slowly. "And here I have proof that the entirety of Gryffindor house are utterly insane." He turned on his heel and left.
Harry sighed. "Well that's not a very nice thing to say. Even if it is fairly true."
"Talking to yourself, Harry? Isn't that the first sign of madness?"
He turned and grinned at Maddy. "Sure is. And I've never denied being mad. In fact, I'm fairly sure I am."
She sighed. "You're impossible, Harry. Now, what ARE you doing in Slytherin territory? Trying to get yourself eaten?"
"Eaten?"
"Oh yes, Slytherins have been known to eat unwary Gryffindors who travel unwittingly into their midst."
"Huh. Imagine that. All these years as a Gryffindor, and yet I've never been eaten. And I come down here a lot."
"You're just lucky then. So, why are you here?"
"Honestly? I'm looking for Draco. Have you seen him?"
Maddy nodded. "He's in the Common Room. I can send him out, if you like."
"Thanks Maddy, that'd be great."
They walked in silence to the entrance to the Slytherin Common Room. When they reached it, Harry stood back as Maddy whispered the password and stepped in. Before it closed, she spoke. "See you later Harry. And have fun!"
Harry rolled his eyes and waited.
**************************************************
Minerva stared at Remus in shock. "Oh my."
He nodded, smiling cheerfully. "A very amusing tale, really, if you ignore all the rule breaking going on for this all to take place."
"Oh I'm ignoring all right. What on earth possessed Harry and Seamus to go to such great lengths simply to date a couple of Slytherins?"
Remus laughed and shrugged. "I can honestly say I haven't a clue. But they have been trying to set Ron and Hermione up for a long time, so perhaps this is just another excuse to work really hard at it. And I think Seamus has liked Blaise for a while."
"I can't believe I've been missing all of this! Promise me you'll tell me what's happening from now on?"
"Of course. Now you know, it would be simply cruel to deny you. After all, curiosity killed the cat, and I'm quite aware of your Animagus form."
Minerva indulged in behaviour not normally associated with Gryffindor's head of house, and poked her tongue out at the werewolf. "You are an impudent brat, Remus Lupin."
He grinned. "You have told me so on numerous occasions, so it must be true."
Both of them jumped as a letter appeared on Remus's desk. He recovered and picked it up, opening it and beginning to read.
'Remus,
There is to be a meeting of some importance. Come to my office immediately.
Albus'
He passed the note to Minerva as a second appeared in her lap, having failed to reach her in her office.
She sighed. "We'd best go."
"Yes," he said, standing up with a sigh. "And just when I was in such a good mood."
"As was I. And now, for all we know, someone's been killed."
Remus went pale. "Siri and Sam were spying on the Death Eaters."
Minerva's eyes widened, but she shook her head. "I'm sure they're fine, Remus. No need to worry. Albus has probably just decided to have another Yule Ball."
He nodded, but Minerva could still see the worry in his eyes.
*****************************************************
Seamus sighed as he stepped into the library. At least now he and Ron weren't the only ones with weird hair colours. Now if only they could get Hermione and Lavender as well.........
Blaise was already sitting at a table with his books out, and was writing something on a ratty looking piece of parchment.
"Hey," he said as he sat down.
The Slytherin looked up as Seamus began taking out his own books. "Hi. I was just writing down an idea I had for pranking Snape." He passed it to him. "What do you think?"
Seamus read it over about five times, before looking up and staring wide- eyed at the dark haired teen. "This, Blaise Zabini, is utter insane genius worthy of Harry himself."
Blaise raised an eyebrow. "And I'm just going to assume that was a compliment."
"It was. Absolutely. Harry's going to love it, and so is Remus as far as I can tell."
"Good. Now, let's get to this Transfiguration."
"Yeah. Last thing we need is to fail and have Professor Minnie giving detentions."
"Professor Minnie???"
Seamus grinned. "Long story. I'll tell it to you some time. When we don't have an assignment from her."
Blaise nodded and gave him a smile, and they both got to work.
******************************************************
The first thing that Sirius noticed was that he had a headache. The second thing he noticed was that someone was shaking him. He groaned.
"Sirius! C'mon Siri, wake up!"
He opened his eyes. "Sam?"
"Yes. Of course it's me. Who else was captured by Death Eaters with you?"
"Ummm........."
"No one, moron. We're here alone, and we have no way to contact Dumbledore. They don't know we're here."
Sirius's eyes widened. "As in, we could be here long enough to be killed and no one would even know anything was wrong?"
Sam nodded. "Pretty much. Its too bad Sev was discovered, or he'd have found a way to get us out."
Sirius was silent, processing that thought. "I don't like your husband, but I can't help but feel the same way right now."
She smiled. "I thought you'd see it my way."
"So any ideas on how we're getting out of here?"
"You're not," a familiar voice said from outside the cell they were in. "You're both going to be questioned, and then you're going to die."
Sam sighed. "Avery, go jump off a brick."
Sirius blinked. "And what good is that going to do?"
His companion smiled. "Well, I forgot to mention that said brick is on the very top of a high tower."
"Ahhh. That all makes so much more sense now."
"Would you two shut up in there?!"
"Leave them be, Avery," a second voice said lazily. "Let them talk if it makes them feel better. They might let something slip."
Sam's left eye twitched, something she'd picked up from Severus. "I hate you."
"Good!" the second man said cheerfully. "Because I hate you too!"
"You're sounding oddly cheerful, Lucius. Want to share the good news?" Sirius asked mockingly.
"Why yes I do actually. You see, Black, I have earned the privilege of extracting information from you two. And I get to do it with no one else in the room."
Sam and Sirius glanced at each other, but neither spoke.
"I'd be scared too, if I were you," Avery commented.
"Shut up, Avery."
The blond man snorted, and they heard him walking away. "Have fun, Lucius," he called as he went.
Lucius smirked as he stepped into the cell. "I assure you I will," he replied.
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
BELLATRIX: Why don't I get to torture Sirius and Sam if I'm Voldemort's most loyal Death Eater?
LUCIUS: Because in this fic, so far you're still in Azkaban.
BELLATRIX: SW, can I get out?
SW: Maybe. We'll have to see. I'm not really planning an Azkaban break-out. Yet.
SIRIUS: (Drowning in sarcasm) Oh yes, because letting the Bitch out of prison is SUCH a good idea.
TOM: She never said she WAS going to do it.
VOLDEMORT: Although I think she should.
SYLVAN: You don't count.
LUCIUS: She's done another cliffhanger again.
SYLVAN: Yeah, I know. (Looks pointedly at Remus) Would someone do something about that?
REMUS: And what do you expect ME to do?
BELLATRIX: (Hopefully) Kill her off?
SW: Hey! I could just kill YOU off, you know!
TOM: She could, too. She could make you suicide in your Azkaban cell.
BELLATRIX: (Sulks)
SAM: I kinda agree with Bellatrix, though.
SIRIUS: Yeah. The Bitch did kill me, but she's got the right idea.
LUCIUS: I'd shut up if I were you two. She could just make me torture and kill you both.
SW: Damn straight! I'm the author here, I have the power! Mwahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!
EVERYONE: (Backing away slowly)
MADDY: My god, things are getting weird around here.
BLAISE: (Nods) Let's go.
MADDY & BLAISE: (Vanish)
SW: Why were they here?
LUCIUS: (Moves forward again) I don't know.
SYLVAN: (Still backing) Just relieving the comic stress, I think.
SW: Oh.
SIRIUS & SAM: I wanna be FREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
DUMBLEDORE: I want to hold my meeting and give out lemon drops to certain dour Potions Masters!
SEVERUS: I want the damned meeting to be over, and my wife to be free, and to know exactly WHY I'm on first name terms with HARRY POTTER!!!!!
REMUS: I want chocolate.
ALL: (Stare at Remus)
REMUS: What?
SW: (Rolls eyes) Whatever.
Okay despite the fact that I took forever to update, I hope you can all find it in your hearts to forgive me.
In the next chapter, I will do my best to adhere to at least SOME of the above wishes. Like Remus's chocolate.
REMUS: Yay!
Please review!
~SW