I do not own the Teen Titans, nor the Blues Brothers which this story is based upon.
Cyborg and Robin head off in the T car on an important mission…
"Come on Rob!" says Cyborg, tapping his steering wheel. "You did promise to meet the Penguin when he was released from the slammer."
"I know, but it doesn't make it better knowing that I can't lay a hand on him…" groans Robin, leaning on the sill.
"Hey! Hey! Hey! No pizza greasy skin on the windows!" says Cyborg.
"Sorry." and he moves off. "But I know he's definitely not going to stay 'clean' for long. I just hope we can put him back in his cage early."
"Same here buddy! What gets me is why he would set up an entertainment centre and in Jump City too! He's practically inviting our inspection of the place!"
"That's what worries me! Let's just hope everything goes as planned…"
…
They pull in, in front of the amphitheatre that Oswald acquired on the dawn of his release. It was cleaned of its old webs and stains, looking ready for business.
Heading past the rows of seats, they make for the stair that will lead them to the office; a great stuffed condor greets them from the top of the staircase in attack position. They look to each other before ascending.
There, sitting behind his little desk, was the Penguin, shuffling papers and smoking his usual long cigar. His monocle gleamed at them and he clapped his odd hands together and smiles his fishy smelling grin, his long nose inviting trouble (he sneezed)
"Ah! Robin, and the renowned Cyborg, how great to see you arrived!" he says in his usual squawky business manner and he extends his hand in a shake. Robin declines.
"What's your angle Penguin?" the boy wonder says, sitting down in one of the chairs. Cyborg also sits down, but unwittingly gets stuck, but he doesn't mention it to save face.
"Angle? What angle? What are you fishing at dear boy?" he says, a little offended.
"Has anyone told you you're a bad actor?"
"Which is one reason why I wanted to see YOU!" smiles the man as he leans back on his chair.
"Um… what?"
"Why THIS of course!" says Oswald, pressing a button on a remote. A screen comes down with a trendy poster displayed with five familiar figures...
TEEN TITAN'S MUSIC FEST
"Um… what?" says Robin, looking perplexed with a sweat drop. Cyborg pulls out his eye to check that it's working properly.
"I was hoping…" continues the Penguin, acting while the shock settled in. "That you may help out in my galla opening of this establishment with a little… um… entertainment?"
"Hey, wait a sec!" says Cyborg while trying to budge from the seat. "What makes you think we can even sing, let alone perform infront of people?"
"Let's just say that your old 'friend' Gizmo has an eye around the place." he chuckles. Cyborg frowns and sees the bug on his shoulder and squishes it.
…
(Somewhere else)
"Oh man!" moans Gizmo. "Wasted again!" and he slumps on his work station.
"Hey Giz!" says Mammoth, eating over the circuitry. "What's that green light on this screen?"
"Probably your wasabi sandwich you great oaf!" says Gizmo still sulking.
"But it's flashing! Wasabi doesn't flash… does it?"
"It is?" says the little green clad man. He swivels over to see that he's indeed right; there WAS wasabi on the screen, but ALSO a green flash. "Boy that's a large one! Wonder where that thing's going to come in?" he says whistling.
"Um… A large what?"
"A space ship!"
…
"You see, I have sponsored this little local charity for orphans and…"
"Do you think we're going to fall for that old gag fat man?" says Cyborg, getting annoyed at the Penguin, particularly his choice in furniture.
"Like we'd believe a white sheeted story like that?" says Robin raising a brow. "You must be losing your grip bird brain."
The Penguin frowns. "If that is the case, I firmly suggest you leave the premises good sirs, lest you have better things to say to my offer!"
Robin sits cross legged and arms behind his head. He wasn't budging. The Penguin was up to something, but what? He had to find out. He was staying until he got a better answer, or maybe until he cracked the case wide open.
Cyborg also remained seated, he wasn't budging either. He was still stuck.
"May I remind you good sirs that I have the right to escort you off the premises by any means necessary!" says Oswald, reaching into his desk.
Robin holds his birdarang gun and Cyborg holds his cannon ready. "Sorry Ozzie." says Robin. "But no shooting umbrellas or hired gorillas are going to move us until you give us the answers we came here to get!"
"As I said Boy blunder; I'm going clean!" reminds the Penguin. "As such, I am abandoning such use of force for more… tactile approaches." and he slaps a wooden ruler on his hand.
"Ha! A ruler?" laughs Cyborg, packing his gun away. Robin does likewise and the mirth. "You're going to chase US out with a ruler? Come on man! You've got to be kidding me!"
"Like we're going to cower at the mercy of a stupid bird wielded… OUCH!" yells Robin as the Penguin hits his knuckles. "That hurt! Owowow!"
Cyborg looks on half smiling as Robin starts to curl up as the Penguin starts to go like a mad golfer with the ruler. "Man this is priceless… OW!" he shouts as the Penguin begins hitting at him too.
"Now kindly move along young sirs and be off!" says the Penguin, using his fine art in sword play to launch a heavy assault of wooden pain. "Feel my fury!"
"Stand your ground CY!" shouts Robin under constant flinches as the ruler connects with his arms. "He can't… owow… keep this Ow up forever! OUCH! My head!"
"You have to do better than that old man! OOOOWWW! You mabe be bit by blip!" he says shielding and cowering from the offended bird. The Penguin, getting tired of hitting again and again, just rebounded it between both of them, until suddenly the ruler snaps on Cyborg's metal. "Phew!" Cyborg sighs in relief, until the Penguin reaches for his cane. Cyborg grimaces but keeps focused. "Stand firm Rob… Rob?"
Robin was already out the door leaving Cyborg to face the terror of the cane wielding Penguin. (Sound's funny huh!) Like a professional fencer (He was), Penguin launches in a flurry of parry, thrusts and swipes with the rod. Still stuck, Cyborg sort of shuffles backwards, unable to avoid the painful blows until he is able to get on his two feet with the chair still on his bum. One step back and he falls down the stairs in a back flip and over and onto the waiting Robin in a smash.
"Now go, until you have redeemed yourselves!" says the Penguin, shrinking back and closing the door.
…
After a brief moment of silence, Cyborg gets up, not too badly hurt by the fall as much as the cane. Luckily he landed on something soft, the chair, and coincidently Robin, who lies mangulated on the floor.
"Ow…" Robin manages to say as Cyborg peels him off the floor. "That wasn't quite as well as we had expected was it?" he moans, rubbing his head.
"Hey, maybe he'll slip up a little later. Catching criminals is a game of patience. And… err… and where's that 'ooh' and 'aahs' coming from anyway?" he says, realising the murmur. Behind him are the orphans of North Jump City.
"WOW!" exclaims a kid. "I didn't think the Penguin was telling the truth!"
"Are they real?" says another.
"Prod them and find out!" says a group and the horde rushes in with autograph pads and pencils. Those who couldn't poke them used the pencils.
"Hey! Now just wait a sec kids!" says Cyborg, hoisting the now pencil marked Robin above the sea of fans. "What are you all doing here?"
"Mr. C said that he had gotten you guys to perform for us!" says one ecstatic girl. "We didn't know it was true until now!"
"With the money, we can finally fix up the old orphanage!" says another boy in a wheelchair. "You guys rock!"
"This is so GURGALURGE!"
"Can you sign my arm cast?"
Cyborg begins to sweat nervously as the praising goes on and his ability to resist the Penguin's fine plot was dropping. Robin notices the Penguin looking on from the staircase smiling and waving with a contract and pen ready.
This wasn't going the way it was planned…
Really doing this to get away from my dark fiction of Teentitans vs Fanfiction, which I'm also doing at the same time. Havea read if you're game enough.
Happy Readings!