I would like to offer my sincere thanks to my Beta COmtnLady for being so wonderful. To those of you who keep reading this in hope of an actual new chapter I am sorry. I keep re-working it because it's my baby. Hopefully this is the last draft.
The village had an eerily quiet atmosphere to it as Remus hurried frantically towards the end of the lane. There was no Dark Mark, no obvious signs of dark activity, but something was very very wrong. He rushed around the final bend and almost fainted from shock.
"Prongs..." he rasped, his throat suddenly dry and tight.
He stood in cold horrified, disbelief at the sight before him. Where just a few months previously he had been celebrating Harry's first birthday, there was now only rubble. Smoke was rising from a few small fires that still smoldered among the ruins of what had once been James' home.
No accident could have caused this level of destruction.
The deathly stillness was abruptly broken by a thin high wail. Already shaken and on edge, Remus whipped out his wand and whirled around looking for the threat before he recognized the sound.
"Harry!" he hissed, walking cautiously towards the source of the cries. If Harry had survived then maybe there was hope. Remus knew he had only a few moments before the Muggles would wake and start making a scene; if any of the Potters were alive he had to find them now.
His heart sank as he spotted a red-headed figure partially buried under a collapsed wall. Lily was lying motionless, limbs splayed out, pinned by the heavy masonry. Her eyes were open, but dull and glazed - he didn't have to check for a pulse to know that it was too late to help her.
He wanted to howl.
"No!" He told himself sharply, "keep it together, you're a man not a wolf."
Forcing himself to breathe regularly he scanned the wreckage around him, desperately searching for the source of Harry's cries.
Then he spotted a cradle, absurdly normal in the midst of the destruction. It was there that he found Harry, terrified and bawling for his mother. A large slash on his forehead was weeping blood into his eyes. Remus reached down and scooped the child into his arms, rocking him gently and whispering words of comfort as he tried in vain to stop the bleeding. Harry whimpered pitifully into his shoulder as Remus moved into the remains of the hallway, searching for James.
"Please! Not James too, please!" He was praying, he didn't know why, he didn't even know who to, but somehow he knew he had to. "Please, don't let him be dead too."
He spotted James propped awkwardly against a partially crumbled wall. A picture still hanging upon its nail was tilted a strange angle as if something - or someone - had hit it very hard. Still clinging onto Harry, Remus crossed the remaining distance in three steps and was by his friend's side.
James was unconscious, his eyes half closed and rolled back in his head. Blood was trickling from a nasty looking wound where his head had connected with the wall, but he was still breathing.
"James?" No response. "Prongs!" Remus felt for and found a pulse, weak but steady.
It was so awful, how could this have happened? For a moment panic ran rampant through his brain before he calmed enough to think rationally. He needed to send a message to Sirius, to Peter, to any of the Order. They had to be warned. One whispered incantation later a silvery magpie had vanished into the night.
James and Lily were supposed to be hidden, they were supposed to be safe…the Fidelius Charm. His mind stopped dead in its tracks - the Charm! As he worked through the implications, what little had remained fixed was now abruptly turned upside down and shaken vigorously.
His heart was beating so fast that he felt suddenly sick. Sirius! He was the Secret Keeper! The Death Eaters could never have found the Potters unless...there were only two possibilities. Remus didn't want to contemplate either of them.
Either Sirius was dead already after being tortured for his information, or Dumbledore had been right and there had been a spy. But Sirius wouldn't have betrayed them…he couldn't have betrayed them.
He was momentarily reeling with the enormity of what had happened when he heard the sudden loud and very familiar roar. Tensing, he took Harry and withdrew silently into the shadows, setting him down in a dark corner. Remus himself ducked behind a collapsed wall just as a large motorbike fell with a thump on the charred lawn.
"Prongs? Lily? Is anyone there?"
Sirius Black strode frantically through what had once been the hallway of the ruined house.
A cacophony of voices erupted in Remus' brain, all screaming for him to do different things. If Sirius was here then he wasn't dead and if he wasn't dead then he must have given up the secret willingly. If he'd done that then – the awful truth dawned slow and terrible.
But what should he do? Sirius was growing closer with every second. It was only a matter of time before he found Remus and Harry. The noise of his footsteps crunching over broken glass sounded only metres away. Remus took a deep breath. It was too late to run now and besides he had to stay and protect James.
"I'm afraid you won't have the chance to finish your work, Padfoot."
"Moony?" Sirius was white and shaking. "What the hell have you done?"
For one moment Remus couldn't answer him, nauseated at the ease with which Sirius could lie to him. How could he stand here, alive and whole and still pretend to be innocent of such a terrible betrayal?
"What have I done?" he hissed, prowling toward Sirius. "Who was the secret keeper, Padfoot? Who betrayed James?"
It was all Remus could do to control himself and not let his primal magic spill over.
Sirius, who had been moving away from him, stopped dead and looked at him in confusion.
"It wasn't me, Moony!" he said urgently. "We switched the Secret Keeper, it was Wormtail..."
"Don't lie to me, Sirius." Remus snapped. "James wouldn't have done anything so stupid, we all know Peter is far to weak to defend himself alone."
An expression of sudden despair filled his friend's face, as if his world had just collapsed around him.
"That's why we picked him instead!" Sirius sounded desperate now. "It was a bluff!"
"Some bluff." Remus spat acidicly.
"Moony please! You know what Dumbledore feared, we thought that if the spy didn't know the secret keeper then Peter would be safe."
"Then why didn't you tell me? Do you expect me to believe that James would do that and not tell me?"
The look of shame on Sirius' face gave him all the answers he needed. "He thought it was me didn't he." Remus's voice grew low and dangerous. "He thought it was me and you encouraged him? You piece of scum."
"We were scared Moony. I was convinced Peter would be loyal. I persuaded James to make the switch. If I'd ever known the rat would do this I'd..."
"You'd have encouraged him," Remus said nastily. "Your connections are obvious, Sirius, you're a bloody Black!"
"Moony!" Sirius pleaded, "please, just trust me. I'm not a dark wizard. I'm your friend, you know me."
"I thought I knew you." Remus said bitterly, "but you let James think I was a spy, Sirius. You told him not to trust a treacherous deceitful werewolf, all so you could murder his family. No, I don't know you at all."
Now a ghostly white, Sirius moved suddenly towards James.
"Stay still!" Remus ordered.
"For God's sake Lupin, he's still alive," Sirius snapped.
"And I want him to stay that way!" Remus barked back, "if you move any closer I swear I'll kill you."
There was silence as Sirius' gaze flicked between the wand, Remus and James.
"Where's Lily?" he said finally.
"She's dead!" Remus yelled. Unheeding of the shock on Sirus' face, "what did you do it for? You already had everything you could ever want all the friends, all the talent. How could you lie to me, to James, to all of us!"
Remus ended his tirade shaking with rage. He had never felt such terrible anger in his life. The wolf was restless inside, howling to be released.
"I didn't betray them!" roared Sirius, his dark brows drawing close together. "James is like a brother to me. I would never give them away!"
Blinded by rage Remus cast a Binding Hex, but Sirius was too quick with his Shield Charm and it rebounded harmlessly.
"If that's the way you want it then, Moony," he snarled, moving suddenly towards his friend. Startled, Remus recoiled, giving Sirius the fraction of a second he needed to send a return Hex towards him. With no chance to avoid it Remus fell paralysed to the floor.
He was facing the wrong way to see what Sirius was doing but he could hear him. He heard the sound of boots crunching on broken glass and shattered masonry; the whisper of expensive silk as Sirius knelt down, probably right in front of James; heard the sound of a softly whispered incantation; heard the spine chilling whisper of "you bastard son of a blood-traitor" fall from Sirius' lips and, just as he thought he might burst from rage and frustration heard a sound he had never been so glad to hear before.
"Sirius, what you doin' ere?"
Remus strained his ears but couldn't here Sirius' reply. There was a pause and Hagrid spoke again.
"No, Dumbledore says to wait for the others to come."
Remus heard Sirius' angry reply and the buzz of the two voices battling back and forth.
With each new second that crawled past, the sense of dread that he felt became greater. Would the hex be lifted only for him to find James lying dead by Sirius' hand? What if Sirius attacked Hagrid? What would happen to Harry? He was just a child, what had he done to deserve this? What if James lived and Harry died? Would James ever forgive him?
"He's my Godson!" Sirius was saying fiercely.
But Hagrid would not be drawn. "Dumbledore's orders is Dumbledore's orders. I can't let you take 'im."
"Right," Sirius snarled in a voice that Remus knew was dangerous, "right. Well I've got a few things to take care of. Look after Harry."
Hagrid found Remus only moments later, but without a wand he was powerless to help. Nor could Remus communicate his desperate need to know if James was even alive or dead. It was another few torturous minutes before the first cracks of apparition began to fill the air.
"Finite Incantatem."
Remus looked around for the source of the spell, only to find himself face to face with Mad-Eye Moody.
"James?" he asked urgently.
"Easy lad," Moody extended one arm to help Remus up, "Potter is still with us."
Remus scanned the ruins, frantically searching for signs of Harry. His eyes came to rest on the outline of Albus Dumbledore. He was kneeling in the grass a few feet away and examining James with an increasingly solemn expression on his lined face.
"We must take him to St. Mungo's immediately," the old wizard said finally. " I can do nothing for him. He has been subjected to the Cruciatus curse. He is dying."
"Sirius betrayed us..." choked Remus, rage welling up from the pit of his stomach. "He's gone, he fled!"
At this Dumbledore looked up sharply. "Where?" he barked.
"How am I supposed to know? I was bloody hexed!" Remus swore loudly, caring little for manners or politeness. Dumbledore didn't answer him; he was already striding across the lawn to greet Hagrid.
"He was right there." Hagrid was saying tearfully. "I could'a stopped him an' I let him go."
Dumbledore's voice was quieter, but still Remus caught the words as he spoke them.
"Calm yourself, Hagrid. You cannot be blamed for something you were not aware of. Let us give thanks that Harry is safe."
Remus almost tripped in his hurry to be at Dumbledore's side. There, in the headmaster's arms, was Harry, bleeding and silent but very much alive.
"Give him to me." He said insistently, but Dumbledore shook his head. "Harry must be taken to St Mungo's. He may yet be suffering from any number of invisible after-effects."
"Then I'll take him!"
"No." Dumbledore said sharply, "you have been through quite enough. I have arranged for you to stay with someone I trust implicitly."
Molly Weasley appeared by Dumbledore's side carrying a blanket and a mug of hot cocoa.
"You're coming back with me," she stated in a voice that would tolerate no disobedience.
He scowled at her, but she ignored the look on his face and wrapped the blanket around his shoulders while forcing the mug into his frozen hands.
"Molly, just let me be. I don't want any help," he snapped, wrenching himself free from her gentle touch.
The violent motion upset the cocoa, which slopped over the side of the mug and doused his wrists and arms in hot liquid. The sudden pain shocked him out of his self-absorption. Feeling suddenly drained of all resistance, he sank into the motherly arms of his comforter and within a few seconds they were outside the Burrow.
In no time at all Molly had conjured up a meal and was ferreting through the cabinet on the kitchen wall for a sleeping draught. Remus couldn't think, couldn't eat, couldn't do anything. He pushed peas around his plate distractedly, unable to muster the will to chew and swallow.
"Here Remus, just have a drop of this it'll help you to rest..."
"I don't want it, Molly. If I sleep I might forget and I need - I need to remember everything. Why could - how could- Sirius do this? I don't understand, I..." Remus took a deep shaky breath, he had been through enough grief in his short life to know that crying didn't raise the dead, but he couldn't help it. Words poured out of him in a sobbing flood.
"If only I hadn't been so stupid. I almost got Harry killed! What if James dies because of me? Harry won't have any parents and it'll be all my fault!"
Wordlessly, Molly sat down next to him and took his hands in hers.
"What Sirius chose to do tonight is not your fault, Remus. It will never be your fault. He fooled all of us, even James and Lily." Her voice shook at the mention of Lily's name. After a few moments she steadied herself and continued. "I spoke to Dumbledore before we left. James is at St. Mungo's now, and they're doing all they can. It was a good thing you were there, Sirius might have killed him as well if you hadn't intervened."
Just as she spoke there was a thudding on the stairs and Arthur Weasley appeared in the kitchen. His normally genial face was pale with worry.
"So is it true? Lily is..."
"Yes dear," Molly replied quietly, giving her husband a look that said 'no questions'.
"Remus is going to stay here for a few days."
Arthur sat down next to Remus, looking sideways at the other man. He looked very much like he wanted to say something but couldn't find the words.
The three of them sat silently in the kitchen staring at the clock, hoping for news. Soon though Molly stood up and began pacing back and forth across the kitchen floor, the tension obvious in her posture.
There was a sudden knocking on the front door. Arthur pulled out his wand, one could never be too careful.
"Let me in, Weasley yer crazy Muggle-lover."
It was Hagrid's voice. Arthur threw open the door to admit Hagrid, who entered bowed almost double.
"Got something for yer," he said cryptically. "Dumbledore wants yer to look after him here for a while, says to keep it quiet like."
"Harry!" Remus gasped, taking the child from Hagrid and drawing him close to his chest. "How is James?"
"Out cold," Hagrid replied grimly, "Healer said it's a mercy he is after all them curses he took. Brave man that James Potter."
"Yes," Remus said impatiently, "but will he live?"
"They don' know. Said we've got to see if he makes it through the night first." Hagrid sighed heavily, "well I'd best be goin' got a lot to be doin' up at Hogwarts come morning."
The room seemed a lot bigger once Hagrid left it. Harry had lain quiet and still in Remus's arms; like most children he could sense the wolf, but unlike most he did not seem afraid. Molly made a small sound when she caught sight of him and moved closer.
She caught him up and rocked him gently in her arms, cooing softly with the practiced skill of motherhood. "Oh isn't he beautiful, Arthur, he has Lily's eyes exactly! We must get him to sleep at once, the poor child has been through enough for one day."
Remus had a strangely fierce impulse to seize Harry from her and never let him go. With some effort he squashed it down and persuaded himself that here, at least, Harry would be safe.
"Come along Remus, you as well," she said softly, so as not to startle Harry. Too tired to argue, he followed Molly up the creaking wooden staircase and into a small but homely looking room with a neatly made bed. He fell into it fully clothed and was asleep before his head hit the pillow. His dreams were filled with red and gold and the faces of Lily and Sirius dancing together on her wedding day.