Beautiful Lie
Chapter Four

His whole body felt cold, yet he was sweating as if he finished one of his three hour work outs. He was twitching slightly and his muscles weighed a thousand pounds it seemed. He stayed on this strange, unfamiliar bed, afraid. It wasn't like him, Heero Yuy, to be controlled by a nightmare like this- it was embarrassing. He didn't even remember what it was about…but it did cripple him.

He glanced over at the blinking clock- 5:30 am it read. Two hours before school; his last day before a nice two weeks off. These weeks would be spent getting to the bottom of this world, and whatever Trowa seemed to be hiding. Even though the cold solider seemed to be more "human", Heero could sense his old aura hanging around him like a bad habit.

Speaking of Trowa- old memories could never die with that one. Heero began to fully remember his relationship with the heavy arms pilot, during and after the war. Though vague, Heero could still remember the touch of Trowa's wet, sweaty skin, against his own, the smell of his soft hair, and the feeling of complete venerability and passion that one can only feel in a moment of complete randomness. It wasn't even just a casual f---, it was more than that…it was much more. Heero remembered that much.

-

Heero didn't bother to call any of his "friends" to walk him to school; he didn't want to see the masks that they wore, they weren't the people he remembered.

Though his attempt to outwit, outsmart, and out run the band almost failed. It seemed the one tie to his past knew his plans.

"Are you stalking me?" Heero spat as Trowa appeared behind him.

"Perhaps…" his voice trailed off, and he slowly made his way to his friend, "I remembered our conversation Monday- after that you haven't spoke to me…you haven't even glanced at me. You are thinking, thinking about what I want from you…and what you want from me."

Heero didn't let his face expressed the victory he was feeling- Trowa new exactly what he was thinking about without Heero having to even make eye contact…this was the Trowa he knew.

"You know a lot for a pervert," Heero snapped coldly.

"Heh, I thought of all people…you should know."

And there it was, what he had been looking for the entire week he spent in this perfect hell, a link to his pass .All his calculations were correct, Trowa was the brains behind the operation, and that could only mean he was up to no good.

A secret corporation was planning to take over the world, so they capture and brainwashed the gundam pilots (thanks to Trowa) so that they can find the secrets to the power of the Gundams. What a brilliant plan it was, but Heero was to smart for that.

"Who are you working for," Heero hissed, stepping in front of his ex friend.

Trowa merely cackled in Heero's face, causing the perfect pilot to clench his fist in anger.

"Out of all of us," Trowa began smoothly, "Your theory is the most unique. You are so paranoid Heero.

For the first time Heero felt the urge to just pick up a gun and shot Trowa- shoot him dead that it. He was talking in circles, trying to confuse the pilot. He was an enigma Trowa, still is and always was…so why was Heero surprised at this? Because Trowa was trying to dispel his theory…

If it was an evil corporation Heero could just blame it on someone and destroy them. If it was anything else, what would he do? He only knew how to fight, how to bleed, how to take out his anger and pain on some evil villain. If there was no villain…where does the plain go?

"I feel for you Heero," Trowa said softly, touching the angry face of Heero with a soft hand, "I was the same way when I came here- angry, confused, afraid…but I got over that and just accepted it…"

"Accepted what?" Heero said more calmly, smacking the taller boys hand away.

Trowa was silent, hiding his face behind that huge bang of his, "Forget school, lets go to my house…I won't hide it any longer."

Heero was at first reluctant, having no weapon he was defenseless against Trowa, but he had to know the truth and only Trowa knew. So despite the screams of agony in his head, telling him to stop, he went on with Trowa.

-

They sat on the ex-soldiers mysterious normal bed, in his strangely normal bedroom, in a crazy normal house he shared with his mother and father. Heero looked over at the night table to see an action figure of Heavy arms, Trowa's gundam, same size as the one on his.

Trowa strolled over to the gundam, delicately picking up the link to Heero's so called reality.

"You think, you wanted to have a different life right? And then once you have it, you want the old one back." His voice was chilled to the bone, almost painful to hear, "I thought that's what I wanted. A perfect life- mother, father, sister, perhaps a dog. I would go to school with my friends and worry about normal teenage boy things. You know Heero, girls, grades, sports." He paused for a forced chuckle, "Well, in my case...I like guys."

Trowa laughed again, "Oh the irony! The one thing that would make my world perfect wasn't even here!" His hands tighten around the fragile figure, letting an arm fall to the floor, "I guess I was selfish- I wanted you here but to be here...you would have had to..."

His voice trailed off, and cold hallow eyes morphed to sad, wanting eyes, which began to rain tears on the boys soft cheeks. "You would have had to..."

"Had to what?" Heero said softly, a tone he didn't recognize.

Trowa looked into the cobalt eyes of his pass lover, walking over to him with the gundam still breaking in his hands. "No one else has these Gundams on their nightstands, Heero, only us...we can't leave the past behind.

"I can't leave it yet, because I have been waiting for you to catch up...and you can't because you still can't accept your fate."

Heero's eyes narrow, "What fate?"

Trowa continued to stare into his eyes, dropping the plastic gundam, letting it break against the hard wood floor. The taller boy reached his hand and touched the soft face of the short brunette, an evident sadness lingering in his eyes.

"Open the door...Heero."

Heero looked over at the closed door that lead to the hallway of Trowa's perfect house. Or was this even his house? He remembers everything of the real world, just like Heero.

So were your calculations correct, Heero?

Heero moved away from the heavy arms pilot, over to the door that had Trowa stomach in knots.

What are you so afraid of Heero? It's only a door...it can't hurt you can it?

"Doors can't hurt me..." He swung the door open...

But the truth can...

He stood there, in the Trowa's room, looking at a place that was not Trowa's house. He let his eyes adjust to the darkness that blanketed this new world. There were dark, angry clouds that covered the night sky, the ground was wet and muddy from the rain, and there were gravestones...everywhere.

Heero turned around, only to see that the perfect room was gone, and only Trowa was left behind. The taller boy was staring at the broken toy gundam that laid on a weed invested grave, the sadness filling his eyes.

Heero walked over to his friend, staring up at him, confused by it all. He was willing to admit it, that for once he didn't know what was going on…he was weak this one time

"Trowa…?"

The taller boy didn't flinch a bit, just continued staring at lump of rock that stood before him. Heero followed the gaze and his eyes fell upon the most horrific words he had ever seen scribbled…

Here Lies Trowa Barton

May the angels ease his soul, once and for all.

Dead…Trowa was dead and had been for a few months. But that was impossible right? Trowa was clearly alive, standing before Heero letting the tears flow freely. No dead man can cry…or can they?

"No this is a joke, this is part of the plan," Heero shouted.

"There is no plan Heero." Trowa sighed, "No one is after you anymore…you don't have to worry."

Heero breathed heavily, shouting in his head "NO, this can't be the end! Trowa maybe dead, but not me!

"You have to accept it Heero…"

Heero backed away from the evil grave, shaking his head violently; words screaming at him to not believe this demon Trowa. No way would Heero Yuy ever find himself dead; he was to strong, to smart, to perfect to die.

He backed up until he stepped on something. He looked down to see his foot squishing an already broken Sandrock. "Quatre…"

He swung around to see another weed invest grave…

Here likes Quatre R. Winner

His struggle for peace will continue in death.

And another

Here Lies Duo Maxwell

Loving Husband and Hero.

And…another…

Here lies Chang Wolfei

His words will live on in the hearts of his comrades.

And then he laid his cold, cobalt eyes on the final grave; clean of weeds and chips and bugs. It was the cleanest of them all…the newest in the long line of graves.

Here Lies Heero Yuy

The Enigma whose deeds will never be forgotten.

"This can't be…"

He felt the cold arms of his friend wrap about him, pulling him closer; but his eyes never left the grave that showed his name.

"I'm sorry Heero," Trowa said, resting his head on the shorter boys head, "I'm sorry I had to show you this way."

"How…did this happen?" Heero felt long due tears well up in his eyes; he felt free yet trapped at the same time. He could feel again, yet he was afraid to move on from his life, into his death.

"I'll tell you my love…"

-

It was a few months ago when the news arrived that a new terrorist organization wanted to take over the colonies and the earth. They had attacked many of the colonies already, and had grown so powerful that earth was their next target. Government officials on earth got together to stop them; gathering all the armies they began battle in space.

The public, including us, were cut off of all information about the war in space. However, there was a rumor that the new terrorist had gotten the blueprints of our Gundams, and created their own…more powerful ones.

I was in school….

It was a normal day, you didn't show up, Quatre was busy doing something more important, Duo was trying to get Hilde pregnant, and Wolfei just decided school was too stupid for him. I wanted to become more than a gundam pilot and a circus performer, so I went to class. I guess, that was my mistake.

The terrorist blew up the school. I didn't die instantly- the paramedics retrieved my body and…

-

"They called me…" Heero finished, "They called me and told me what happened. Duo, Wolfei, and I met your sister at the hospital, while Quatre met with the government to try to stop this madness.

"It was late right…your sister couldn't see you die and Duo and Wolfei were so mad they had to take a walk. I was the only one who stayed with you that night."

"I just refused to die," Trowa continued, choking on his tears, "I wanted to stay alive and fight this war- Quatre pretty much brainwashed me into thinking that way. You wouldn't let me…"

"You were suffering so much, I could stand it anymore."

-

The hospital was big and white, and my room had a perfect view of the sunrise- I could feel every twitch and pain that over came my body.

"Die," you said coldly, "die Trowa…"

You were holding my hand so tightly, like you really didn't want me to go, but you knew I couldn't stand it any longer.

"Trowa...it's okay if you...go...we will understand, we won't don't want you to suffer."

-

"Then you died," Heero mumbled, hanging his head as he was holding back more tears.

"I came to, well I guess we shall call it heaven, and was very confused- I didn't accept it until a few weeks into it. Even though I had accept death, I still couldn't move on...then Quatre came and I realized my duty. I had to ease you all into death while waiting for the one that tied me to the past."

Heero looked over at Quatre's grave, "I remember how he died..."

-

He was giving a speak to the nations of earth and to the colonies about keeping the peace. He was so angry after you died...he shouted and cried and gave the most powerful speak I had ever heard someone give. It was so real, it was so passionate...

but...

Shouts rang out...everyone ducked. Quatre was shot in the heart. He backed up against the wall, breathing heavily. He slid down the wall, a trickle of blood followed him. Duo and I ran up to see...if maybe...we could save him. That was a sorry joke...he was dieing in front of us and we couldn't do anything. I think...I think we were scared.

"Don't...cry..."

That was all he said.

-

"He was angry when he got here," Trowa spoke coldly, "It was something I didn't expect from him. I almost couldn't save him from hell- but I managed."

-

"Trowa don't you get it!" he shouted, while clutching his gundam, "We have to save the world, we have to kill the bastards that killed you!" He swung around, staring coldly into my eyes, "You are dead! That's fine and dandy, but I can't die, I can't give up!"

He was seething at this point, the gundam was breaking in his hands like he soul did that day. I couldn sense the sadness and anger swelling up inside him, complicating his thoughts. I wasn't going to lose him again...

So I punched him, hard, and made sure he hit the wall. That knocked the sense into him, so much so he started to cry...

"I'm dead, I failed..." he whimpered.

"No, you didn't fail- You got assassinated...I mean if you would have shot yourself then that's a different story, but no, some moron was like 'Oh look at me, how cool am I, I can assassinate a guy speaking for peace! Haha!' Yeah so...he failed not you."

I hadn't noticed until then how much this world was changing me- I was talking and acting more freely than I used to. It was a breath of fresh air in my opinion. Quatre merely laughed at me, that cute little laugh he has...I missed that.

"Thank you Trowa, I see now."

-

"What about duo and Wolfei?"

"They went out as I would have expected; dieing in battle. I doubt they would have wanted it any other way."

"Did they accept it?"

"Well, Duo fought it a bit -he didn't want to leave his wife- but of course he eased into it just fine when he saw all the hot women who wanted him. Wolfei accepted death before he died, so he came right in completely changed."

Heero chuckled slightly, "He, I would have thought, who have fought it hard."

"Well, shows how he isn't so easy to read."

Heero paused, clutching his fist, digging his nails into his palms; he knew he was next in line.

-

You, Heero, died a very lonely and painful death. You got sick with some space virus, in the middle of a colony you didn't know. They doctors tried to save you despite knowing they could never be paid. You didn't care, you lost everything and death was just something else you had to deal with. No one was there...except for me.

I sat at the edge of your bed, watching you closely. You were very calm, very stoic, looking over at the door as if waiting for someone to come in.

As midnight approached you were getting closer to death, and you could fully sense me in the room.

"I see you have come death," you said slowly, "I have been waiting for you..."

"And I you."

"Did it hurt like this?"

"It did...at first."

You paused for a second, still looking at the door...waiting with your eyes.

"She isn't coming is she?" You sounded disappointed.

"Relena...is not coming."

"I knew she wouldn't come...I was actually going to wait for her this time."

You didn't know...Relena died a few hours before when her ship crashed in earths ocean. She has joined her father in her own heaven, so I am sorry to say you won't be seeing her.

"Heero, I think it is time to go now." The clock struck midnight, and I could hear the loud bells go off, shaking all of the colony. Well...the bells weren't shaking the colony...it was the missiles aimed for it.

You didn't feel that though, you were dead a few minutes before. I remember your last words...

It happened so fast. No one knew what hit them. Even those trained to sense these kind of disasters. So what happens now?

-

"So what does happen now?" Heero whispered.

"We forget."