The air was cold. All Shikyo could feel was the cold fabric of hospital sheets against her skin. She groaned and rolled over, opening her eyes. Naruto sat staring at her, from a chair right next to her bed.

"Naruto! Where…"

"The Hidden Leaf hospital. Registered under your name." He held up the diary. "Shikyo UZUMAKI!"

"Burn it. That diary? Yeah. Burn it. Burn it and bury the ashes!"

"Hell no. This is just EVIDENCE! So what are you? A sister? Cousin?"

Shikyo choked. "Um, um… I'm your…"

"Yeah."

It was obvious Naruto hadn't bothered to read it.

"I'm your wife."

Thump.

Naruto fell over. He stood up again and said, "I'm sorry, could you repeat that?"

"I'm your wife."

Thump.

Naruto sat up. Shikyo was looking at him like he was insane. "Wife?"

"Yeah. It happened the day I was born. The Hokage wanted to help you out a little, so if you ever had financial trouble, you would be able to play with the immense Kusubana fortune." She sighed. She was very weak, having about twenty percent of her chakra.

"But… You like Sasuke!"

"Yeah… If you never found out I could secretly divorce… But now you know, and you're gonna be pissed, huh."

"Pissed? PISSED? HELLO Shikyo, WAKE UP, I just found out I'm FILTHY RICH! HAHAHAHAHAHAAA! YESSS!"

He danced around. "I can FINALLY rub something in Sasuke's face! WOOHOO! YEAH!"

Suddenly he began to cry.

"Okay… Naruto…" Shikyo muttered. "What are…"

"SOMEONE ELSE WITH THE LAST NAME UZUMAKI!" He cried. "I have family! I am SOSOSOSOSOSOSOSOSOSOSOOOOOOOOO HAPPY!"

Shikyo grunted. She felt all the bandages around her shoulder. "Naruto? Do you remember what happened?"

"Yeah! You used this TOTALLY AWESOME jutsu and turned into a fake nine-tailed fox!"

"I… It wasn't… It wasn't fake."

Thump.

Cynthia looked out a window and shivered. The air was cold and icy. Somehow, she felt less angry today…

Temari yawned and walked out into the main landing. "Mornin', Cynth."

Cynthia spun around, but relaxed and looked back out the window. "Morning, Temari."

"So I guess you're part of the band, huh." Temari muttered. "Me and Gaara and you and…"

"Yeah, I know." Cynthia interrupted. Last night had been a dream. Gaara had dragged her to some room she had never seen… And opened the fridge and told her to eat as much as she freaking could. Builds energy, he says. (A/N: What did you think I was going to say? XD)

Temari began to toy with her fan. This caught Cynthia's eye. "What's that?"

"My fan."

"You fight with it?"

"I sure as Hell do."

Cynthia held out a hand. "Could I see it, Temari?"

Temari shrugged. "Whatever…"

Cynthia spread out the fan, noticing the three circles on the tough paper. She ran her fingers along all of them. "What are these for?"

"They add to the power. I like to use wind and junk, and this adds to the power of the wind. It's really heavy, and the circles kinda make it lighter."

Cynthia picked it up with one hand and twirled it around. "Really, I don't seem to notice. Does the fan have I name? I like it."

"Really? Gaara thinks it's girly."

"Well, Gaara don't know jack, does he?"

Temari didn't say anything. Gaara wouldn't kill Cynthia, but he would definitely kill her.

"The only reason I have to listen to him is this frigging chip in my frigging neck." She went on, tapping the chip. "Only problem is, it doesn't seem to frigging come off. If I want to be evil, I want to be my own damn boss."

"You know what, you're using MY strength and MY sand, so you'd better listen to me or I'll kill you."

"EEK!" Cynthia's eyes grew super big and her pupils shrank super small. "GAARA!" She leapt up and barely balanced on the windowsill. "YOU FREAKING SCARED ME!"

"That's what I do. Now what was it you just said? About wanting to be your own boss?"

"HAHAHAHAHA!" Cynthia waved her hands innocently. "Nothing, nothing! Gaara, haha, I wouldn't work for anyone but you!"

"Really."

"OF COURSE!"

His black-ringed eyes slanted, but he said nothing.

"Master Gaara, sir!"

Seikei tapped down the hall in her bare feet. "Kazekage is here."

"WHAT! That freaking geezer?" Gaara's blood began to boil. Ah, the man who continuously orders his assassination.

"It appears so. He does have close to ten ninjas with him. I'm sure they won't be a problem."

Gaara went downstairs to the main doors. Cynthia and Seikei followed, Temari preferring to stay out of the line of fire. Cynthia just wanted to watch them kill each other unmercifully.

"Ah, son."

Gaara flinched visibly. Kazekage had NEVER called him son before. Maybe once or twice when he was young.

"I knew you would be here. Who are your friends?"

"What do you want, old man?"

"Can't a father just come to see his son?"

"You can't, because you're the worst father the world has ever known."

At least you have a father. Seikei thought. I was scientifically created, dammit!

Cynthia opened the book that read 'alchemy.' "Hm. Who gives a crap about parents. They're weaklings. Unskilled and highly perverse. Old man, we're busy. Go back to your board games."

Gaara shot her a warning glance. Only HE could talk to the Kazekage and not get killed.

She knelt to the floor and took a look at her book, ignoring the furious glare shot at her by both Gaara and the Kazekage. She pulled some chalk from her shoe and began to draw a circle on the ground, checking her book every few seconds. Some time ago, she had lost her halberd.

She pressed her hand to the ground… And made a kunai. "Right. I just need it to be a THOUSAND TIMES BIGGER!" She picked it up and moodily flung it at a wall, where it dug deep into the wood. She cursed and drew another circle.

"Charming girlfriend." The Kazekage spat.

Gaara and Cynthia just sort of twitched.

"SHE'S NOT MY GIRLFRIEND!"

"I'M NOT HIS GIRLFRIEND!"

"Cynthia, if you can make a halberd, I will gladly let you kill him."

"Yay."

"Put some chakra in it…"

"WHAT THE BLOODY HELL IS CHAKRA?"

Gaara and the Kazekage looked at each other. It was probably the first time they both looked doubtful.

This girl can't be a bright one. The Kazekage thought.

"It's that stuff… You know, that's like… Inside you, that… Stuff." Gaara tried to explain vaguely. It had been a while ago when he learned EXACTLY what chakra was.

"You mean like blood?"

"Yes. I mean, no… What the Hell are you doing?"

Cynthia retrieved the kunai and pricked her thumb, letting four drops fall into the center of her circle. "Edward says that whatever light appears when you transmute something just as you want it to be represents what element you are best at manipulating. The Colonel has a red light for fire. My light is yellow, which is the default. Edward's light is blue, and that means…"

"CYNTHIA DAMMIT!"

Edward sprang from cover, and ran over. "DON'T TELL ALL YOU FREAKING KNOW!" Cynthia gasped and slammed a hand into the ground. A halberd pulled out, which she swung at Edward. "DIE, BASTARD!"

Edward leapt back and countered with his arm. "Ohh, bastard. Little Cynthia is angry."

"DIE!"

Edward leapt over her and pressed a finger into the chip in the back of her neck. "Yeah, well, you're going to be normal whether you freaking like it or not."

"DESERT COFFIN!"

Edward was encased in solid fountain of sand, squirming angrily. He broke out his right arm, but the sand closed over it immediately.

Gaara glared at him from the ground. "Uh, no. Cynthia works for me now whether you like it or not, little alchemist boy."

Cynthia watched Edward being crushed. Her eyes were still black but they began to flicker. "Edward…"

Gaara glared at Seikei. "It's fading, Seikei!"

"It's not my fault. It's simply fading. Her emotions must be affecting the power of the chip!"

"YOU SAID NOTHING ABOUT EMOTIONS!"

"You didn't ask."

"Edward! Hang on…" Cynthia quickly flipped through her book and drew a circle on the hard sand. "I can break it…!" She slammed her hand into the sand. It exploded, but however, before any of it hit the ground it pulled back around Edward.

"Alchemy's not going to work, Cynthia…" Gaara sighed, obviously bored with it all. "Seikei, just slap on another chip."

"No can do… The effects will layer up and generate an impenetrable field. The oxygen will be burned up in the field and Cynthia will die."

"I'll remember that."

Cynthia tried circle after circle. She began to cry and panic. "Edward, Edward! Gaara! Don't kill him!"

"I can and I will."

The sand squeezed tighter. Edward cried out and squirmed angrily. Cynthia fell to her knees at Gaara's feet. "Undo the jutsu!" She begged. "Please! Let Edward live!"

"Hmm… No."

Tears dripped down her cheeks and splattered on the floor. Cynthia growled and her eyes turned to slits, but Gaara said, "If you turn into a Lalaurana I will kill the boy."

"Cynthia!" Edward gasped. "When—Ugh…—When I die, I'll be sent back to Germany…"

"NO!" She screamed. "I won't let that happen! You'll forget me again, I just freaking know it!" She put her face in her hands. "Please… Gaara…"

Gaara looked down at her, a sort of confused look on his face. He had long since forgotten the definition of 'love.' Why does she care for him so much? He thought. Can't be his looks. I just don't get it! He looked at Edward, who was still squirming with angry energy. What's so special about this Edward guy? He turned his dark-ringed eyes back to Cynthia. And why does it hurt me to see her cry?

He knelt down to her. "Cynthia?"

Cynthia looked up. Tears were running freely down her face, and her eyes were wide and glassy.

"What is the meaning of love?"

This made everyone just stop. Edward felt the sand loosen a bit and sighed with relief.

"Love is…" Cynthia fumbled for the right words. "Love is when you want to stay with one person forever. To protect them from anything. To care for them, and show concern…" Cynthia sighed and looked at Edward, then back at Gaara. "You don't get it, do you…? Now just… Set Edward free…"

The sand tightened around Edward. He gasped and squirmed with renewed energy.

"No."

Cynthia's tears dripped down faster. She flung her arms around Gaara and cried into his shoulder. "Set Edward free! Don't kill him! Please!"

Gaara flinched. What the Hell was going on? Cynthia's arms felt warm and powerful, and his shoulder felt wet with her tears. Hesitantly, he lifted his arms and wrapped them around her. "F… Fine…"

The sand faded and swirled back into his gourd. Edward landed on the ground, gasping for air.

Seikei watched them, anger growing in her. Master Gaara, and that HUMAN! Well, demon-human-thing. She made a number of hand signs and whispered, "Demon seal no jutsu!"

"AAAH!" Cynthia screamed. Blue electricity shot from the ground up into her brain. She stumbled back as blue fire began to grow on one of her arms. "What? AAH!"

Gaara watched, rather embarrassed. But soon the gourd on his back burst into flame as well. The flames licked off the sand and onto his clothes. He made an awkward yelp in surprise and tried to beat out the flames. Seikei directed her energy towards Gaara and blinked. And Gaara blacked out.

Cynthia blew out the flames. "WHAT THE HELL YOU FREAKING CLONE! She spat. But Seikei was gone. Cynthia looked at Gaara and the flames that began to singe his skin. Edward transmuted a bowl of water and splashed it on Gaara. Cynthia picked Gaara up and walked out of the building, leaving Edward, who picked up the gourd.

"Cynthia, what…"

Cynthia ignored Edward's cries. Seikei cursed at them from the building, but stayed back to make a plan. Seikei now wanted to kill Gaara, and Cynthia knew of only one place that was safe…

Roy Mustang sighed and marked down his name on some paperwork. Boring, boring… He could be dating Hawkeye right now. There was a knock on his door. He sighed. Maybe if I don't answer they'll go away… He muttered. There was another knock, and another. Just as he was about to scream, a shrill voice yelled, "OH, SCREW THIS! ROY MUSTANG! I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE, YOU DAMN COLONEL!"

Roy jumped up. Cynthia?

He opened the door. Cynthia stood there, holding the limp form of Gaara, both of them bleeding from terrible burns and cuts. "Gaara needs medical attention, ASAP!"

Gaara gasped and sat up. He pushed the sheets down to rest on his waist. A bed? He was asleep? He couldn't sleep!

He looked around. It was a quiet, small room, in a large town he didn't recognize. There was a closet in one corner. And…

Cynthia sat in a chair, staring out the window. One leg was freely set to rest on the ground, but her other was hugged up to her chin.

"You're awake." She said in a small voice.

"Where am I? And where the Hell is my gourd!" Gaara demanded.

Cynthia threw something at him. He stuck out an arm and caught it, looking. It was a simple, small silver key.

"Your gourd is locked up in the downstairs janitor's closet. Go get it if you want that demon to possess you all the time."

Gaara looked at the key. "Where am I, exactly?"

"Amestris, Central City. Colonel Mustang's spare room. Your subordinate, you know the clone, she made a demonic seal on us, rendering us both powerless for the time being."

Gaara looked down. His chest was wrapped in bandages, as were some parts of his arms. "Huh?"

"Fire. Blue fire."
"What about before?"

"What do you mean?"

"You know…"

"The hug…" Cynthia groaned. She turned red, but kept her cool. "I, um, just, um…"

Gaara smirked. Cynthia glared at him. "Shut up!"

"GOOOOOOOOOOOOD MORNING CYNTHIA!"

Mustang swung open the door cheerfully. "Your friend is awake!"

"Good morning, sir." Cynthia bobbed her head respectfully. "And he's not my friend. We're 'acquaintances.'"

"We were a lot more than acquaintances yesterday…" Gaara mumbled.

"I TOLD YOU TO SHUT YOUR FREAKING FACE!"

"You enjoyed it."

"I DID NOT! I wanted Edward to stay alive!"

"Pssh."

"DON'T YOU 'pssh' ME, MISTER!"

"Who are you my father?"

"I can and will throw that gourd of sand into the freaking ocean!"

"Calm down, Cynth!"

"Huh?" Cynthia looked at the necklace shoved into her face. It was flat, and silver, and looked like the Fuhrer's insignia.

"Combat specialist Major Cynthia Suhn."

"WHEE!" Cynthia reached up to take the necklace. "Thank you, Colonel!"

"IF YOU TOUCH THAT I'LL KILL YOU!"

The shriek was deafening. Mihoshi glared at her from the doorframe. "For a child like yourself to join the military! OF AMESTRIS!"

Cynthia smirked and put on the necklace. "What are you gonna do? Kill your finest pupil?"

"Second finest."

Cynthia stared at her blankly. "Huh."

"I said, second finest. You're my second finest pupil."

"WHAT!" Cynthia leapt up from her chair, knocking it over in the process. "Who? I'll beat the crap out of her!"

"I am NOT a girl!"

The voice sounded angry and rather annoyed. A boy stepped from behind Mihoshi, fuming and carrying a bag full of his things. He had a handsome face and a strong body, and short, unruly hair. His eyes were scarlet and gleaming with mixed anger and confusion. He wore the same karate uniform as Cynthia.

"How did that loser surpass me?" Cynthia shrieked.

"If you want me to explain in ninja terms, you are at the level of a Chuunin. My pupil here is at the level of a Jounin."

"WHAT! A CHUUININ? I am SO at the level of a Jounin! I beat Kakashi!"

"With my help…" Gaara added.

"WITH HIS HELP!"

"Kurushimi beat me twice when I was drunk and once when I wasn't. You beat me ONCE when I was drunk and NEVER when I wasn't. Kurushimi even knows a jutsu or two, and two forms of advanced martial arts."

Cynthia shot Kurushimi a glare. Kurushimi just glared back at her and smirked. The great Cynthia Suhn is nothing more than a cute little kitten. He thought. A VERY cute, frisky kitten.

"So go marry the guy, Sensei." Cynthia spat. "He seems your type. Annoying and hot. I can see why you enjoy teaching him, you b—"

"'Kurushimi' means 'pain.'" Gaara interrupted. He laced his fingers together thoughtfully. "Such a strong name is prone to granting the user immense spirit and strength."

Cynthia glared at him.

Kurushimi laughed. "Yeah, but mind games are more my style, panda eyes."

"Gaara, don't hurt him…" Cynthia warned. Gaara had already started making hand signs… When he realized there was no sand nearby. "He doesn't sleep a lot, got it?" She hissed. "Leave him alone."

"Ooh. Frisky kitten."

"Kitten…" Cynthia flipped open her alchemy book and began to draw a circle.

"What was it you said about not hurting him?" Gaara asked angrily.

"Shut up."

Roy spun on his heel. "Um…" He ran out. "Work…"

Kurushimi rubbed the back of his head and looked at the clock on the wall. "Mihoshi sensei, I have to meet my girlfriend. She's flying in from Tokyo to see me…"

"Oh. You're SO special because you have a girlfriend." Cynthia muttered sarcastically.

"At least we get to French! You've probably never French kissed in your life."

Cynthia turned red. "I have so!"

"With redhead?"

Gaara glared and began to make hand signs, but his chakra level was too low.

"I HAVE NO FREAKING ROMANTIC INTEREST WITH GAARA!"

Gaara and Kurushimi smirked. Cynthia glared at them both. "I DON'T! I like Edward!"

"You don't seem to show it." Gaara put in.

Cynthia gritted her teeth and looked at the wounded sand ninja. "Kurushimi, Mihoshi sensei, please give us a moment alone."

Once they were gone Cynthia glared at Gaara and hissed through clenched teeth, "Heartless ninja."

"What did I do?"

"You freaking…" She began. "You freaking… You freaking…" She sat back down in her chair. "You just freaking SUCK!"

She grabbed the leg of her chair with her metal hand and squeezed it, crushing it in her palm. "You make fun of me for loving Edward when a emotionless freak like you doesn't even know what the freaking word means. It's not even just a word! Love is an emotion. You feel it. At times you might have feelings for more than one person, but I… I've lost all feeling for Sasuke, Naruto and Envy. Sasuke has Sakura, Naruto is married, and Envy's alternate self is a blood-crazy homunculus. Seeing Edward in such pain several days ago made me realize how important he is in my life. I need Edward to go on living. But you, Gaara, you freaking ninja, you don't feel this for anyone and you never have!"

She was crying now, burying her face in the fabric of her sleeve.

"That's not true."

Cynthia looked up. Gaara was sitting, hugging his knees to his chest and staring blankly at her.

"A long… A long time ago, when I was probably around five, or six, I felt the love of a person. But that person ended up trying to kill me. I killed my mother, and now my fate is set to kill my father, and every other human being on this planet but myself."

Cynthia looked at him sympathetically. She wanted to show this poor boy the feeling of love, the sensation of a kiss, the warmth of a long hug. But she couldn't do that without…

Gaara looked up to find her sitting next to him. "Gaara, you've never actually felt happy before, have you?" She asked. He shook his head.

"Happy is another emotion we humans have. It is very important to some, but to others, it is merely an option of expression." She thought of Sasuke as she said this. "A kiss is an action of love, which generates happiness. So is a hug. A smile makes people feel good. That's what you have to work on, caring for others."

"My existence in this world is to kill every human being besides myself. I have no other purpose."

"Pssh! Destiny, fate, all that crap… Forget it. My father told me my fate was to take over the family company and become a billionaire." She spread her arms wide. "Hello, dammit, look at me. I'm a combat specialist for the Amestris military. Maybe that was what you were born to do, but who says you HAVE to? Just sink the stupid gourd in the ocean and become a normal ninja. You'd still be the most powerful in the Hidden Sand village!"

"If I sink the gourd, the sand will find me." Gaara replied. "I cannot escape it…" He looked at Cynthia. "Cynthia? Could…"

"Sure."

So Gaara leaned over, and gingerly touched his lips to hers. He pulled back violently and spun around, glaring at his reflection in the window.

Idiot, why the Hell did you do that? He thought.

Cynthia was red. It barely even passed as a kiss… But she still flushed red. She felt as if Gaara had accomplished so much just by that.

Gaara turned back to her, and Cynthia looked back at him. She smiled. "That was good, Gaara…"

"You talk to me like I'm a little kid."

"Well, I…"

"I'm your age."

"Yes, I know…"

"So you wanna make out?"

"Well, I… Sure."