Disclaimer: I don't own Resident Evil, Or Wizard of Oz, Or Final Fantasy, Or Capcom, or Sherlock Holmes. What? You never know who's reading this!

Luna: Here's the next Chapter…

Chapter 6: Lions and Tigers and Bears, OH MY!

Kevin had entered another jungle area and for some reason kept repeating the phrase ' Lions and Tigers and Bears Oh my!'. Except he changed it around to ' Infected Lions, Zombie tigers and non-existent Bears oh my!' Yoko just stared at him, oddly quiet after their episode in the lake.

Make a long story short, Kevin and Yoko traveled all the way to the concourse with the lion statues. And the tigers prancing around. Actual tigers.

" HOLY SHI-" cried Kevin, as one ran after him.

Legs pumping, Kevin ran to the gate, only to have it locked on him. Poor Kevin…The tiger knocked him to the ground, and Kevin screeched, " I'm fallen and I can't get up!"
Yoko was doing the usual. Collected things and recollecting, completely ignoring Kevin since he declined her offer of making out Final Fantasy style. But Kevin didn't have to fear, for David the magic plumber was here!

David bopped the tiger on the head with his homemade concrete hammer, okay so bopped isn't the word…more like 'smashed in the tiger's brains mercilessly'; but whatever. The tiger died, its infected corpse landing on top of Kevin. Did I mention how much Kevin hated his life? I did? Good.

" Sorry, man." said David, and lifted the tiger corpse off him. Or was about too, cause just then; the 200 pound dead tiger disappeared. Oh the plot holes, Capcom…

Not even bothering to question it, our pony tailed plumber lifted Kevin up and carried him. Kevin didn't know whether to be grateful or scared.

" Oh no! Kevin, are you okay?" asked Yoko.

" For one that was nearly kitty chow and then had a dead tiger fall on him and then magically disappear; yes. I'm fine." he said, sarcastically.

" The gate's locked." stated David.

" Sherlock here is right. Yoko, tell me you have the Lion's Emblem?" asked Kevin.

Yoko blinked. " Lion's…Emblem?"

Kevin began cursing enough to make any truck driver blush.

She grinned. " I'm kidding! Here!" she handed it to him.

Kevin growled and took it to the Lion Statue. Sometime she picked to grow a sense of humor…he thought, angrily. He placed it in the indent, David still supporting him.

" You know…you can let go now." said Kevin.

David let go and looked away, " So that's the thanks I get."

" I'm sorry! I just wanna get the hell out of here!"
" You could remember your manners."

"…Just shutup!"
" Hey, look! The gate!" cried Yoko.

The gate swung open, and Kevin was the first one there. He ended up in a station with a trolley/train thing.

" WE'RE GETTING OUT OF HERE! WOOOO!" he whooped.

That's when the Lion appeared.

Kevin sighed. He knew it couldn't possibly be this easy.

Armed with his favorite hand gun, Kevin began shooting it as David bludgeoned it with his hammer. Yoko happily picked herbs and sticks off the floor, oblivious. If they ever needed homicidal Yoko, they needed her now.

" Yoko, you COULD help us!" screamed Kevin.

" I know." said Yoko, humming.

" And…?"
" Oh, you mean now?"

" YES, NOW!"

The lion was still alive through the hail of gun fire and hammer beatings, growling and tackling David and or Kevin. Yoko threw a piece of concrete at it. The lion keeled over and died.

Figures…he thought.

Over come with joy, Kevin skipped to the trolley/train. Okay, so he ran like hell, same difference. His very useful partners boarded as well, and the train began to move.

It was then that Kevin had an 'intense' monologue.

Back then I shouldn't of said 'let's have fun while we're here'. That has to be my biggest mistake in this whole trip…that and moving to some hick town called 'Raccoon City'. Pah! I haven't spotted one raccoon here and I've been here for at least 10 years! I need some scotch…and hopefully Yoko doesn't become my stalker, that girl was a walking disaster.

David's monologue: I hope our furry friend rests in peace.

Yoko's monologue: Me and Kevin totally hit it off. In midst of all this tragedy, I think I fell in love…I know he feels the same way.

She turns and winks at him. Kevin shudders. Suddenly, the train stops at the so called ' help center'. There was a crashed helicopter and at least 40 zombies on fire trudging about.

Kevin's eyes widened.

" Hey, what do you know? My prediction was right after all…hehehe…" he said, in mock humor.

To be continued…

Luna: This concludes the " Where the Wild Things are" scenario. Next up is Under belly. And if your confused about Kevin's last line, check back in Chapter 1...lets see if you can figure it out. Thanks for the reviews! .