Disclaimer: I do not own Yami no Matsuei in any way, shape, or form. No matter how many times I wish for it... -sighs- Why is the world against me! -calms down- Sorry for that outburst... -sweatdrops- On with the story!
Warnings: Hints of TsuSoka, past references to MurSoka, language, and yeah... this is a one-shot... Enjoy!
After the snow falls...
The light breeze brought with it a bitter chill and fresh flurries of snow. In the black oblivion of the night sky, tiny diamonds shone distinctly, to make up for the lack of a moon. Yet the shadows of the earth still existed, taking shelter beneath trees and shrubbery. Their menacing figures were reflected upon the pristine white blanket that provided no warmth at all, just the ice cold malice.
Hisoka never realized how much he hated the snow until now. It was cold and bitter, taking so much time to walk through. Sometimes, one could sink into it's powdery depths. It could kill too, if one allowed it. It killed the life that came to be in spring and flourished in summer and sickened in autumn. It's cold grasp taking the lives of the plants, sometimes the lives of humans as well. Snow brought with it disease and hunger for all living beings, even with new technology it couldn't be denied that there was really no form of protection from the white menace. How ironic, a blanket of pure white only bringing cold, fear, and death. Just like him…
He shuddered, partially due to the cold wind that seeped in through the open window and also to the fear that plagued him when he thought of demon disguised doctor. The one who took his innocence, life, and warmth. The one who cursed him and dragged his life out for three long, pain stricken years. Now he was tormenting him in the afterlife as well, kidnapping him, threatening Tsuzuki, and hurting Tsubaki-hime.
Unconsciously, his grip on the railing tightened resulting in his knuckles turning white. Why couldn't the satanic bastard just leave him alone? All he wanted was to forget about him, but as long as he kept popping up when they least expected him, that wouldn't be possible. So killing the maniac was the only solution. Despite how barbaric revenge sounded, he wanted the doctor to suffer just as he had and maybe more.
Muraki had given him so much to fear; being alone, sakura petals, blood, the doctor himself, and losing people he cared about. However, there were other things he feared that Muraki hadn't given him, but his own family had. The dark, thunderstorms, and people were all fears given to him by those he had once called mother and father. They had abandoned him over and over and over until it was made perfectly clear that no one would ever come for him. No one would ever care.
"If you think too much like that, your head will explode."
A gasp sounded from his throat as he whirled around to face the owner of the voice. Emerald eyes had widened in surprise, he hadn't been expecting anyone. He was also left with the unsettling feeling that he hadn't sensed anyone else's emotions as they approached him.
Intense green met laughing violet, Hisoka relaxed visibly. Tsuzuki chuckled at the boy from his post, he was leaning against the door frame to Hisoka's room. The empath shifted uncomfortably, then frowned when he realized his partner had enjoyed sneaking up on him.
"Baka." he retorted, his brow creasing as he looked away.
Tsuzuki winked at him, "But seriously Hisoka! You think way too much, keeping all those thoughts in your head will definitely make you explode! And an exploded partner isn't very helpful, you know."
"You could always get another partner." Hisoka murmured, folding his arms across his chest. It's not like I'm that significant of a partner.
"But 'Sokaaa…" the older man whined, pulling an injured puppy look, "I like having you as my partner!"
Hisoka's eyebrow twitched, how had Tsuzuki known that he had been thinking something similar to that? It never ceased to amaze the boy how insightful his partner could be sometimes. Like earlier when they were searching for the missing Snow Queen, it had been dark for the lack of moon and foreboding trees blackened the area. Hisoka had needed reassurance, although he didn't voice that, and Tsuzuki seemed to know that and held out his hand to help him.
"What's wrong Hisoka? Your feet hurt?" Tsuzuki asked, turning around to face his partner who had stopped walking.
A look of uncertainty was plastered onto his face, his voice trembling lightly as he replied. "I… I don't like the dark. I can't see anything."
Tsuzuki looked skyward, "It's the new moon, so it's pitch black."
The dark of night brings bad things… Hisoka shivered, I can't tell where I am. It makes me nervous. Scared…
His violet gaze traveled back to Hisoka. The boy had wrapped his arms around himself, shivering slightly with his head bowed to the ground. Tsuzuki's eyes saddened at his partner's frightened appearance, so he did what he could to help him. Taking small steps, he stopped right before Hisoka and held out his hand. Wide green eyes opened and blinked up at him.
Tsuzuki smiled warmly, compassionately, "Take my hand. I have good night vision."
What's that look? Hisoka blushed as he stared wide-eyed at Tsuzuki, looking so small and young. Suddenly he lashed out, "Don't patronize me! I'm not a little kid!"
"Patronize you?" Tsuzuki frowned at his partner, "I was just trying to help you!"
Hisoka didn't answer, he merely looked away still sporting a scowl. He didn't want Tsuzuki to know how much he appreciated the gesture, or how much he may end up depending on it later on. Even if it hurt the man that he rejected his help, it would hurt a lot less then if he accepted it and then lost it later on.
"Hisoka?" Tsuzuki's voice brought him out of his thoughts, "You okay? You don't look too well."
Hisoka stared at the ground, "I'm fine."
Tsuzuki took a hesitant step towards the empath, then another. When he was halfway to Hisoka, he felt a chill run down his spine. It then occurred to him that the window was open and letting all the warmth of the room out and the cold night in. Somehow, the thought of Hisoka's life and warmth flooding out the window along with it struck Tsuzuki, making him frown in contemplation.
"Hisoka, you shouldn't leave the window open. It's cold and you might get sick." he chided lightly, coming up beside Hisoka and reaching around him to close the window.
The boy nodded, not really listening, but making it seem like he was so his partner wouldn't have something else to worry about. He was much too concerned with his well-being, why did he care so much?
"Why?" he whispered softly, not intending to be heard, but Tsuzuki's pause let him no otherwise.
"Because people get sick when it gets cold, silly!" he ruffled the wheat locks of his partner.
"No… I mean… why do you care so much?" Hisoka clarified, speaking softly.
"Because you're my partner. And if you got sick then that means I'd have to do all the paperwork by myself! And you would be feeling miserable, it's no good to feel sick." he explained, losing all serious tones.
Hisoka met Tsuzuki's gaze, then nodded again, before leaning to the side in acceptance of the answer. What he didn't know, was that in leaning over, his shoulder brushed against his partner's and soon he found himself in an awkward position. He was leaning against Tsuzuki. He immediately tried to pull away, blushing furiously, but the gentle hand placed on his arm kept him from doing so.
"Don't lock all your thoughts up, don't let them engulf you." Tsuzuki whispered softly, "Let me help, don't shut me out. Please."
The was something so desperate sounding in his voice, it was as if he needed Hisoka to need him. Despite Hisoka's want to be independent and not clingy, he let his partner hold him, his way of saying 'alright, I'll let you protect me'. Tsuzuki sighed contently, relieved somewhat that Hisoka hadn't pushed him away and retreated into himself.
"Sometimes," the blonde finally broke the silence, "I'll let you help sometimes. Okay?"
Tsuzuki chuckled and ruffled Hisoka's hair, not even hearing the warning tone he'd given him, "Okay. Sankyuu 'Soka-chan."
"Don't call me that." he snapped, pulling away once Tsuzuki released his hold on him, "Why did you come here in the first place?"
"I wanted to see if you wanted a snuggle buddy!" Chibi-inu Tsuzuki chirped happily, latching onto Hisoka's waist, "I know you don't like the dark, so I thought I could keep you company in bed!"
"Baka!" Hisoka glared at Tsuzuki's unintentional (or maybe it was intentional) flirting, with his cheeks burning brightly. "Let go of me! I do NOT need a snuggle buddy!"
"Hidoi!" the puppy whined, still not letting go, "Hisoka's so mean!"
"I SAID LET GO!"
"NOOOOO!"
Hisoka sighed in defeat, seeing that there was no possible way that he was going to shake the now sobbing puppy away, "Fine…"
"Yay!" Tsuzuki leapt up, letting go of Hisoka and bounding over to the boy's bed.
Hisoka had already changed into appropriate nightwear, sweatpants and a t-shirt, so he just needed to crawl under the layers of blankets and wait for his exceedingly annoying partner to leave him alone. If it wasn't enough that the man had been drunk earlier, but the emotions had never ceased to project off him. He glared at Tsuzuki, who was sitting in a chair he had pulled up beside Hisoka's bed and smiling up at him, but he didn't seem to care.
Of course, the boy was just pissed because Tsuzuki hadn't helped him at all with his Saya and Yuma problem. Both he and Watari had watched and laughed as Hisoka struggled with their harpie ways. They wouldn't let go of him, they wouldn't stop their inane chatter, they wouldn't stop.
Stop.
Hisoka immediately paled and stumbled forward to the bed, it was really cold again. Did someone open the window? It was really cold, he didn't like the cold so much now. It was painful, like the snow and the sakura petals. He was cold then too. Cold and naked. He wrapped his arms around himself, shivering violently. Too cold. Too tired. Hisoka just wanted to sleep, sleep and never wake up. He wanted that when he was alone in the cell, cursed and raped by Muraki, and in the hospital. The cold made people want to die.
"Shhh…" Hisoka was suddenly aware of a warmth that surrounded him, "It'll be okay, Hisoka. Just sleep. It'll be okay."
He couldn't see anything, it was too dark, but the voice was so reassuring and the emotions were so warm. He felt himself slipping and finally, the sweet peacefulness of sleep engulfed him. A land of dreamless nothing.
Tsuzuki had seen the conflicting thoughts of his partner reflect through emerald eyes, the way his skin paled so quickly, and how he fell forward. It had scared him.
As quickly as he possibly could, he was lifting Hisoka up and cradling his trembling form. Small whimpers had issued from his lips, his teeth biting down so hard Tsuzuki was afraid that they would bleed. His skin had turned ice cold, his eyes clamped tightly shut. He had never seen Hisoka like this, what happened on the Queen Camellia had been different, the boy hadn't looked so small and fragile then, only confused and afraid and heartbroken. Heartbroken. Hisoka's heart had been broken again, he had been stepped on and used.
Did he look like this when he was alone? When he was in his house all alone with no one except the dark memories of his past to keep him company? Was he still guilty of Tsubaki-hime's death? Tsuzuki's grip on Hisoka tightened, then he shifted him slightly so that he was lying on the bed. He took the covers and pulled them over his partner, tucking them around him so that he wouldn't get cold. But Hisoka was still shaking.
"Shhh…" Tsuzuki brushed back wheat-colored bangs in a small attempt for providing comfort, "It'll be okay, Hisoka. Just sleep. It'll be okay."
The shivering subsided and his breathing calmed. The tension on his face vanishing as he faded into peaceful sleep. Tsuzuki smiled at the serene image Hisoka portrayed, he looked so much younger when he slept. His face eternally preserved with those boyish features.
When Tsuzuki took Hisoka on as his partner, he had no idea how much work he would end up exerting in order to gain the boy's approval and acceptance. He had made some progress, but there was still a huge mountain to climb before he could get him to open up and trust. But he'd be patient. After all, he was still learning to trust as well. And he'd been here how long? 70 some odd years! Tsuzuki hoped it wouldn't take that long to melt Hisoka's icy demeanor, but if it did… well, he'd just have to deal. Right now, he was just content with watching his partner sleep, just in case the boy had any nightmares. There wasn't any harm in that right?
The next morning, the sun rays danced into the room, appearing warm but only bringing the slight chill of winter along with it. Hisoka stirred and blinked sleepily, it was too bright. Jaded eyes quickly slipped shut again before he rolled onto his side facing away from the window.
"'morning…" he muttered half into his pillow, opening his eyes again, expecting to see a pair of laughing violet optics gazing back at him.
There was no such greeting. He was alone.
The day was a relatively normal one. Tsuzuki whined about not getting enough food before leaving the inn, Watari asked if anyone would be his guinea pig for his latest experiment, Tatsumi yelled at them all, the Chief was singing the entire way back, Hisoka sulked, and the Hokkaido girls glomped him continuously. No one saw the flicker of anger in his eyes when he looked at Tsuzuki, except for Tatsumi.
The secretary paused in his scolding of spending too much money momentarily to observe this. Hisoka had his eyes set on the back of Tsuzuki's head, glaring daggers at the mop of brown locks. He paid no heed to Saya who was playing with his hair or Yuma who was stroking his face, but he was trembling as they cooed over him. Whether it was from fear of the two girls or disgust, Tatsumi would never know. But the angered look vanished, replaced with a hurt flicker, then his normal demeanor was back and he was flailing in a desperate attempt to get away from the two girls.
"Don't touch me!" he shouted, "Damn harpies!"
The two girls simply giggled and clung to him again, all the attention was placed upon the small group. Watari laughed hysterically and said something about Hisoka looking extremely bishounen amidst the threesome. Tsuzuki was looking back at Hisoka now as well, but he said nothing. The only reaction he had to give the boy was a sympathetic smile, which was brushed off immediately as Hisoka found his shoes much more interesting. Tsuzuki frowned, but no puppy ears and tail popped up, this one was a different frown.
Tatsumi was immediately interested in what had occurred between the two when Tsuzuki left to go check on Hisoka the night before. He didn't return to say goodnight to him or Watari, so he assumed that the man had either stayed with Hisoka or gone straight to bed. He sighed as chaos was again reigned among them. Maybe it was better if he didn't know. He'd just pretend that he never saw that pained glance Hisoka gave Tsuzuki.
But he wouldn't pretend that he didn't see the jealous look Tsuzuki gave the Hokkaido girls.
Owari