A/N- Sorry I don't update very fast but... Well, busy with school work. Enjoy it while it lasts, and if everyone sends me lots of nice reviews, I'll take my time and make another one A.S.A.P. Enjoy.

Disclaimer- I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist or any of its characters.

Chapter 5- What do you mean you're not like that!

There was a long wait in line before Ed and Roy could even set foot in the door of the restaraunt, which was slowly degrading the chibi alchemist. He was hungry, and he needed food, now.

"Why couldn't you have made reservations!" Ed whined, trying his hardest to ignore the Colonel standing next to him. "I can't believe this! The one time I'm starving and..."

"Yes, Fullmetal, I have noticed you don't eat a whole lot at my house." Well wasn't this just self explanatory, Ed thought to himself, remembering Roy's foul tasting food and practically puking his guts out after choking it down. Or maybe... Could that have been because he'd stuck his finger down his throat after fearing he'd get food poisoning? "Ah, finally..." Yes, finally indeed.

They were finally admitted through the front door and into the main lobby, where many waitresses in, gasp, miniskirts trudged about, holding themselves a bit more like prostitutes than Roy remembered. Then again, someone knew had purchased the place since the last time he'd been here.

It wasn't long before the pair was shoved off to a table in a distant corner, Roy admiring the complexity of the building while Ed sat in the corner, sulking. There were so many people here, meaning they wouldn't get served for a while.

"Edward, get your elbows off the table. That's entirely improper." Unluckily for Roy, Ed also knew something about table manners.

"Yeah, well, up yours, because if you were really that formal, you'd know it's okay to have your elbows on the table until the food comes." Acting like the baby he was feeling like, Ed stuck his tongue out at the commanding officer and laughed mentally to himself.

"I'm suprised. Never knew you'd figure anything about table manners out. Guess that means you can act more sophisticated back at my house, instead of shoving your dinner in your mouth with one spoonful." Ed sweatdropped.

"Well excuse me, but why are you watching me eat!"

"I couldn't help myself. You're so loud, and I was just thinking to myself how someone so small could eat so much..." That was it. Ed stood up, fists slamming down on the table, the already placed silverware wrattling and almost falling on the floor in the process. "Edward, sit down. You're causing a scene..." Sure enough, many heads had turned at the sudden noise. "Ed!"

"If you're just gonna sit here and... Degrade me like this!"

"I apologize. Now sit down before they throw us out. Then you have to go home and eat my cooking again." The chibi sat down, giving a few angry glares to many eyes that were fixed upon him. "Learn how to act in public." The glare turned now onto Roy.

"Shut up."

Both of them were silent until a waitress walked their way, looking unusually shy, with lightish blonde, shoulder length hair and blue eyes plastered to her face. She was staring at Ed, who didn't even bother to notice her. "Excuse me, but may I help you?" In the most disrespectful voice, Ed gave his answer.

"Uh yeah. You think maybe you could get your manager out here so I can tell him just how much his service sucks?"

"I'm sorry sir, but we only accept letters of complaint at the front desk. I could get you some writing materials if you'd like..."

"Get your manager out here right now!" She sighed. It was possible she got this all the time, but Roy imagined this was entirely unlikely. And he looked a little pissed off as he stared at Ed, who didn't look like he could care any less. "What!"

"I'm sick of you."

"I knew you would be," Ed answered, giving him a smirk. "Does this mean you'll let me leave your house now?" Roy shook his head, alarmingly, as Ed fumed, staring at the table in anger.

"You're just a little socially unstable, if you do care to know what I mean."

Yeah, Ed knew. Roy'd seen it, when Ed had thrown a fit about going to Liore. Still, he didn't have to be this hard on him because of one teensy little thing. "For God sakes Mustang, I'll be fine!"

"I don't believe that for a minute."

"Fine, then don't," Ed snarled. Roy smiled.

"I won't."

"Excuse me?" The waitress was still standing there, waiting for any further commands either of the two could issue her. "But did you two still need something?" Roy's smile got bigger, trying to offer her some console for the damage Edward might have done to her poor ego.

"Why yes ma'am, I would appreciate it if you could provide some writing materials for my young friend here."

Thank God it had been young and not short.

"Certainly." Their eyes followed the young lady as she walked away, still holding a notepad and a pen in her hand.

"So, Mustang..." Roy didn't like the tone of voice Ed was using with him. "You seemed to have taken a real liking to her. Fancy asking her out, on a date?" Roy's eyes got huge as a large smirk appeared on Ed's face. "I mean, with your attitude, you could seduce any woman you wanted to, right?" Definately not a good subject to brush over.

"Uh, no, I don't think so," Roy replied.

"Oh, why not!" Ed looked dissapointed. Roy glared at him.

"You see, Edward, though it pains for me to admit this, especially to you, I'm not like that."

What. The. Hell.

A/N- Sorry! I'm writing this at three in the morning! I'm tired... And I have homework! Crap! Please review!