AN: Actually, I don't have much to say this time. This chapter has taken a little longer than the others but I hope its length makes up for it.Just a warning; there is alcohol abuse in this chapter.

Chapter Four

It was interesting really, how it began.

At least, at the end of it all, Jinx could say he had kept his promise. He did not tell Jak anything.

The mission was crucial, but relatively simple. Torn would fly a ship full of explosives into the Metal Head's main defensive wall. Jinx would fly close behind in case there were any hitches. He was Freedom's best explosives expert after all. Jak would be the gunner in Jinx's ship, seeing as no-one was really sure having weapons on Torn's ship as well as a ridiculous amount of explosives would be a good combination, and no-one seemed to trust Jinx with guns. Sig was coming because… well, no-one was quite sure why exactly Sig was coming on the mission, but he wanted to be a part of it, and no-one was willing to pick a fight with an elf with muscles twice the size of theirs, particularly one that carried the most impressive gun any of them had ever seen. It was when the mission had just started to get underway that Sig leaned over and began talking to Jinx.

"I feel like I should be helping Jak out or something. He hasn't exactly got it easy."

"Don't worry 'bout it," Jinx told Sig, ignoring the actual piloting of the vehicle for long enough that he took a different turn to Torn.

"Dammit Jinx!" Jak screamed from the back of the vehicle. "Where the hell do you think you're going?"

"See what I mean?" Jinx sniggered, taking a path that (he hoped) would lead them back to Torn.

"Not really," Sig answered.

"Really? You mean you haven't noticed?"

"Noticed what?"

"Torn's been in love with Jak for ages!" Jinx said, deliberately exaggerating a little. "And now I'm pretty sure they've got it all worked out."

"You mean…" Sig seemed to pale a little. "Jak and Torn are..."

"Yeah, and I bet blondie's gonna try his hardest to make sure not a single thing hits loverboy's ship."

Sure enough, Jak was paying more attention to protecting Torn's ship than their own.

Sig sat back and thought. Torn and Jak, a couple; well, in a strange sort of way, it did make sense.

A couple of days later, Sig found himself driving Ashelin out into the desert to look for Jak. They sat and watched together as Jak fought the largest Dark Maker they had ever seen. When the battle was over, Ashelin made her way over to Jak, and with only a second of thought, wrapped her arms around him and placed a passionate kiss onhis mouth. This could cause trouble, Sig thought, imagining how Torn would react if he knew his boyfriend was being kissed by someone else.

Daxter sat at Jak's feet, smiling happily. It was good that Jak was finally letting someone close.

Or not…

Jak pulled away from the kiss quickly, taking a few steps back and away from the woman who had just kissed him. Ashelin looked hurt, and just a little shocked. It was no wonder, Sig thought. You'd have to be crazy to refuse someone as heavenly as Ashelin, unless of course, you had someone else.

So it was true.

A few moments passed, and soon Ashelin was standing by Sig once more. There were a couple of seconds of awkwardness, Ashelin being all too aware that Sig had just seen her attempts to take her relationship with Jak to the next level, Sig trying his hardest to work out the best way to tell Ashelin what he had to. Jak had already fled the scene; rushing back to the city to do whatever itwas that Jak did most of the time.

"I don't know what to say," Ashelin said, breaking the silence. "I guess I'm not used to handling rejection."

"Yeah," Sig replied, knowing he was right now, undoubtedly more lost for words than Ashelin was.

"You know," Sig hesitated; not knowing what would happen if he told Ashelin what he knew. It could make her feel better about being rejected, but who really knew with women. "It's not your fault," he settled for.

"What?"

"Jak rejecting you isn't your fault," Sig explained. "Torn's been in love with chilli pepper for a while from what I've heard, and now they're… you know."

"You mean Torn beat me to him?" Ashelin asked, unable to believe what she was hearing. Well, there were so many shocks she had to deal with over the past few days. What was one more?

It could just be a rumour though, right? There was only one way to know.

The next couple of days were ridiculously hectic. If Ashelin had thought she had a lot to digest then, she would quickly learn exactly how many shocks she could live with before she had a complete mental break-down. Not only had she kissed a hero, she had kissed the legendary Mar. She didn't even want to think about the Precursors.

Consequently, it was quite a while before she managed to find time to talk with Torn.

Ashelin had always found if difficult to bring up subjects this sensitive, especially with someone she knew was just as closed up as herself when it came to his emotions.

The Naughty Ottsel was packed full of people celebrating that night. Daxter would have undoubtedly been rushed off his feet if he had actually been working, but as it was he was too busy enjoying the wonderful fact that his Tess was now the same species as him, and customers were pretty much left to serve themselves.

Ashelin spared a moment to wonder how it was this place had managed to stay in business for so long.

Jak was nowhere to be seen. He never had been one for parties.

Torn however, had found something which didn't look overly alcoholic, unlike most of the drinks Daxter was guzzling, and a booth that he had shared briefly with Jinx until Torn had obviously lost patience with the other man and demanded he go somewhere else.

Ashelin slid into the seat across from Torn, sending him a half-hearted grin. He smirked rather than smiled, and Ashelin knew it was the closest she would get to a warm welcome.

"Hello Torn," Ashelin said.

The booth was silent for quite a few seconds. Neither of them could find the strength to meet each other's gaze.

It wasn't that their break-up had been a particularly painful one, but there had been a break-up none the less, and that in itself was enough to make the situation incredibly awkward. Take into account what topic Ashelin was about to raise, and Ashelin was feeling just a little bit nervous.

"So," Ashelin paused as she pretended to stare at one of the pictures on the wall. Daxter certainly didhave interesting taste in art, if it could indeed be called art.

"Is it true?" Ashelin finally asked.

"Is what true?"

"About you and Jak."

"What?" Torn shouted. If the bar had been any less packed and therefore quieter, then heads would have undoubtedly turned. As it was, only a couple of people glanced at the booth,before immediately turned back to their initial conversation.

"How did you find out?" Torn asked, lowering his voice back to normal levels. "Jinx didn't tell you, did he? If he did I'm going to kill him."

"No," Ashelin answered. "It wasn't Jinx."

So someone else had somehow discovered his feelings for Jak. This could be bad.

"Is it that obvious?" Torn asked Ashelin, hoping for once that her answer would be no.

Ashelin thought about it for a while. Admittedly she hadn't noticed it until Sig had brought it up, but maybe that was just her own crush on Jak blurring her thoughts. Now that she knew what to look for, all the signs were there. After all, the two men did spend a lot of time together, and…

"Well, you're both still living here, right?" Ashelin mentioned, realising Torn's true reason for not moving to the palace as she spoke. "And you're not exactly doing anything to hide it."

Torn groaned and leaned his head against the table. If what Ashelin had said was true, then it could only be a matter of time before Jak found out, and then… He didn't even want to think about what came after 'and then'.

"You're not denying it then?" Ashelin asked, wanting to make sure that the rumour wasn't only a rumour.

"What's the point?" Torn grumbled.

"Right," Ashelin sighed and stood up from the booth.

"Is that the only reason you wanted to talk to me?" Torn asked, bitterness flowing into his voice.

Ashelin considered apologising for kissing Jak, and then decided it was better if she pretended the kiss never occurred.

"Pretty much," she answered.

"Hmph."

So, Jak was officially 'off the market' now, was he? It was a depressing thought. Ashelin had thought they had so much in common too, and though she didn't dislike parties quite as much as Jak, she found that right now, she wanted to be any place but the Naughty Ottsel. She needed time to collect her thoughts, mainly the ones that involved Jak.

She only realised she had begun to cry when a couple of passer-bys gave her a sympathetic look. She wiped the tears away in frustration. She was the leader of this city for Precursor's sake. She needed to be stronger than this. Or at least, she needed to appear stronger than this.

She turned into the first door she could find, and as soon as she made sure the room was empty, collapsed on the floor. She took another look around the room through tear-stained eyes and realised how long it had been since she had visited this building. The city's entire power supply was controlled from the vast array of buttons and twinkling gadgetry in front of her, yet no-one at all that she knew of took time to visit this place. It was just as well, she reflected, because it meant there was no-one around to see her cry.

"Wh… what are you doing here?" A slightly whiny voice erupted from nowhere, shattering all thoughts Ashelin had that she was alone.

"Who's there?" she called.

"Sorry," the voice spoke again, and an abnormally large holographic head burst into staticy blue life in front of her.

"It's me, Vin. You probably don't remember me, but then again, does anybody?"

Vin. Yes. Ashelin did remember Vin, even though they had only met a couple of times through the resistance. Anyone this strange was actually quite difficult to forget.

"It's… it's Ashelin, isn't it?" Vin asked. "You see, I'm quite horrible with name, but it is Ashelin, right?"

"Yes Vin, it's Ashelin." The woman couldn't help but smile at Vin. "What happened to you? I thought you were dead."

"Well, technically I'm not alive anymore. I'm a bit brain. You see? Oh, never mind. Every time I try and explain what happened whoever I explain to just looks at me funny. Sweet eco, have you been crying? Oh no; I don't have a clue what to do in these situations. It's just… um…"

"It's okay Vin," Ashelin said. "You're doing fine as it is."

"Really?" Vin's holographic head stopped bouncing around in panic. "Ah…Well… What am I supposed to say next? Did you want me to say anything, like 'what happened' or something like that?"

"What happened?" Ashelin sighed. "You know Jak and Torn, right?"

"Jak and Torn? Sure, although Jak hasn't visited me once, even though he said he would, and Torn probably doesn't even know I exist, but yes; I know them."

"They're together," Ashelin said. When Vin didn't respond at all, she continued. "As in, Jak and Torn are a couple."

"And that's a bad thing? "

"Well, yes," Ashelin said, getting a little impatient. "Because I'm in love with Jak."

"Right. Yeap, I'm getting where you're coming from now. Are you sure they're together?"

"I just got an admission from Torn's own mouth."

"Why don't you try and break them up; convince Jak that you're better than Torn?"

"I can't do that!" Ashelin shouted. "Torn's still my friend, and if he's truly in love with Jak then I should just be happy for them."

"So why the tears?"

So why the tears indeed.As much as she wanted to stop it, another smile broke out on Ashelin's face.

"Thank you Vin," she said, getting to her feet.

If he was human then Ashelin knew she would have kissed him on the cheek. As it was, she wasn't sure whether that would work, so she settled for blowing a kiss as she exited the room.

Sure enough, Vin turned bright red.

"You can really tear up the concrete on that thing," Torn remarked as Jak skidded to a stop right in front of him.

"It comes with practice," Jak was modest enough to say. He sent a shy smile Torn's way, unaware of the flutters that appeared in Torn's stomach as he did so.

He was spending more and more time with Torn lately. He found that Daxter wanted to spend less time with him now that he had Tess, he couldn't go completely without company, and his friendship with Torn was, he had decided, a safe one. Torn wouldn't upset him and would be able to defend himself in case Jak did loose control, he didn't try to pull him out of his shell like Jinx did, or kiss him like Ashelin, and he never asked for anything that Jak wasn't willing to give.

Yes, Jak decided, spending time with Torn was all right.

There was also the unfortunate, or possibly fortunate (it was hard to tell which) fact that ever since he had broken down in Torn's arms, the older elf had been keeping a close eye on him, meaning that Jak was spending time with Torn whether he wanted it or not.

"So Jak," Torn said after a few moments of companionable silence. "I hear Ashelin kissed you."

Torn would not in a hundred years admit his true motive for asking Jak. If Jak did have something happening with Ashelin… Torn let out an involuntary shudder. It would certainly explain Ashelin's sudden curiosity as to the nature of Torn's feelings for the other man. Your ex-partner going out with the man you had a crush on though; there was something just not right about that potential situation.

Jak blushed as soon as he heard Torn's question; the memory of Ashelin's attempt to further their relationship coming back to him with embarrassing clarity.

"I also heard," Torn continued. "That you weren't too enthusiastic about it."

"I… kinda pushed her away," Jak admitted.

"Pushed her away?" Torn repeated. "Why? And don't say she's not your type man. Ashelin is everybody's type."

"I just can't get into a relationship with her, that's all."

"You can't? If it's because she's my ex, it doesn't matter. I won't hold it against you." Torn wondered for a moment why he wasn't discouraging a relationship between Jak and Ashelin. Oh well, if it made Jak happy then it was worth it.

"It's not that," Jak told Torn.

"What then?"

"I just can't!" Jak shouted. He froze as soon as he realised he was beginning to get angry.

Torn realised his mistake, and searched around quickly for an appropriate subject change.

"I bet you couldn't do that triple back-flip again," he settled on. The look in Jak's eyes immediately changed.

"You're on," he said, whipping out his jetboard.

Seven hours and three new personal bests later, Jak found himself suddenly very alone. It wasn't a feeling he was particularly used to.

Torn had received a call from Ashelin, who had called him away to the responsibilities being Commander of the city guard left him with, leaving Jak by himself.

Jak found himself wandering aimlessly. He let his feet take him where they would, and he found himself at the door to the city's eco-grid control building.

Jak paused for a moment. Well, he had told Vin he would visit him some time and it wasn't as though he had anything better to be doing.

"Hey Vin," Jak called out as he entered.

"Jak?" the holographic Vin greeted him as soon as the door had shut behind the blonde. "Oh, so now you come and visit me. I suppose you've been too busy with your boyfriend, huh?"

Vin was bitter. Jak wasn't at all used to that. It felt… strange.

Wait a minute! Jak's thoughts caught up with Vin's words.

"What the hell do you mean 'boyfriend'?" Jak asked.

"Torn," Vin said very slowly, as though he was addressing an idiot. "The guy that's in love with you."

"What?" Jak couldn't help but smile. Boy did this guy have his wires crossed if he thought Torn was in love with him.

"Torn isn't in love with me," Jak insisted.

"Um… are you sure, because Ashelin said she heard it from Torn's own mouth… and… uh… this is so confusing!"

"You're telling me." Jak shook his head and began walking out of the building.

"What; you're leaving already?"

"I'm sorry Vin," the blonde said. "I have a lot to think about right now. I promise I'll come visit you some other time.

The door slid shut behind him.

This could not be happening. Jak would not let it happen. Torn simply couldn't be in love with him.

Then again, he didn't think Vin was the sort to gossip, which meant Torn really had told Ashelin he was in love. Unless of course, Ashelin had made the whole thing up as some sort of twisted way of getting revenge.

No, Jak thought. Ashelin wasn't that sort of person. It was one of the things he liked about her. Which only left one solution; Torn really was in love with him.

Unless Torn had lied to Ashelin.

And why in the name of the Precursors would he do that?

This was so wrong; the one person he had been able to find an innocent sort of comfort in was in love with him. Love, in Jak's experience, could only lead to one outcome; pain. It was the reason he had refused Ashelin. It was the reason he would now refuse Torn.

Yes, Jak decided, having Torn so close to him when the man was in love with him was dangerous. He would not hurt Torn. He could nothurt Torn; which left only one thing to do.

He had to push Torn away. It was for his own safety.

"So, let me get this straight," Daxter said, for what seemed to Jak to be the tenth time that hour. "Torn, as in the tattooed wonder, as in the guy that has sent you onpotentially suicidal missions more times than I can count, as in the guy that couldn't give a damn about anyone, is in love with you?"

"Dax…" a cute blonde ottsel whined from on the bed beside Daxter. "You shouldn't say such mean things about Torn."

Jak ignored Tess for the time being, and continued to pace backwards and forwards across the room.

"That's what I just said," Jak told Daxter.

"I don't believe it," Daxter sighed, flopping back on Jak's bed.

"Neither did I," Jak said. "But he has been strangely nice to me lately. He gave me the Peacemaker, and the challenges are getting easier, and there was that time when he waited for me in the rain for hours."

"He what?" Daxter shrieked.

"Aww… that's so cute," Tess cooed.

"No it's not," Jak snapped. "He shouldn't be in love with me. It's too dangerous."

Daxter jumped up then, a scowl on his face. Daxter was serious, an event which didn't happen too often, and which Jak had learnt to respect.

"Now you listen here Jak," Daxter said. "It may not exactly be the most perfect choice of a girlfriend, but even if it is only Torn, you need to start opening yourself up to someone!"

"I'm being open with you, aren't I?"

"Not like that! I mean, you need a Tess. Or, someone that to you is like Tess to me. You know what I'm saying?" Daxter gestured to his girlfriend, who smiled sweetly.

"Yes Dax, and no, I don't need someone like Tess," Jak sighed. "What I need to do is stop Torn from liking me somehow. I'm going to take him out somewhere tomorrow night. Hopefully he'll get drunk and end up going home with someone that will prove to be better for him than I am."

"Jak," Daxter whined.

"I'm sorry Dax. I know you're upset about what happened with Ashelin, but this is just the way it has to be."

Jak hadn't expected Torn to give in to his request so quickly. Then again, it made sense if Torn was in love with him, and the more Jak tried to come up with reasons why Torn couldn't possibly be in love with him, the more he realised it was the only possibly explanation for Torn's behaviour of late.

The Naughty Ottsel felt too much like home for either of them to feel like they were going for a night out, so they left it behind, heading to night-spots more interesting and far less familiar.

Torn led Jak to another bar which proved to be much larger and fancier than the Naughty Ottsel. The bar itself curved along the back wall, allowing plenty of room for a dance floor, even though only a handful of the bar's occupants were making use of the space. The interior was dark and softly lit, making it far more seductive than the Naughty Ottsel. It was the perfect place to set Torn up with someone.

Torn himself didn't have a clue why the blonde had suggested they go to a bar, but he wasn't about to refuse Jak anything.

The two men found a couple of seats at the bar and settled in. The bartender, a pretty brunette that looked somewhere between their own ages, shuffled over to them immediately and flashed them a smile to rival Tess's in sweetness.

"What can I get you boys?" she asked them.

I better keep it simple, Torn thought. The last thing I want to do is get drunk while I'm around Jak. I might do something I'll regret later.

"Give me a Little Red Zoomer," Jak said before Torn had a chance to order.

Torn took a quick look at the list of cocktails behind the bar and saw the drink Jak had ordered. Torn gazed at the ingredients.

Oh dear.

Well, if Jak was planning on getting drunk that quickly then he definitely needed to stay partially sober in case the blonde needed someone to look after him.

Torn ordered something a lot less alcoholic than Jak's drink, and grimaced as Jak began to drink the concoction in front of him with a ridiculous amount of speed. Not once did getting drunk figure into Jak's plan for even a second, yet somehow he found himself clutching another Little Red Zoomer before he even remembered ordering it.

Torn winced once more as Jak downed his second drink as quickly as the first. Whatever Jak was trying to achieve, it didn't look healthy.

Jak noticed Torn looking at him and frowned. How many drinks had Torn had so far? That couldn't be his first, could it? Of course not. Jak had already had two. Wait a minute; hadn't they only been in the bar for a few minutes? Jak's mind seemed unable to provide him with an answer.

A third drink suddenly seemed like a very good idea. Jak didn't know what was prompting his decisions any more, but suddenly getting drunk didn't seem like such a bad idea after all. You didn't worry about things when you were drunk, like whether or not you were going to kill someone if you didn't keep yourself completely under control.

The bartender gave Jak a worried look as she handed over his third drink.

"Torn," Jak said as he watched the bartender's retreating form. "Don't you think the girl that serving us is really hot?"

Torn took another quick glance at the woman in question. She certainly was beautiful, but not as beautiful as other people in his immediate vicinity.

"I suppose so," Torn grudgingly admitted. He hoped Jak's purpose in inviting him out tonight wasn't so that they could go looking for potential girlfriends.

"When you were with Ashelin," Jak pulled himself away from his drink for long enough to say. "Did you love her, or was it just, you know, sex."

Where in Mar's name did that come from? Torn wondered. Maybe that was it though. Maybe it was Jak's worries concerning Ashelin which had brought them here.

"I loved her," Torn said. "At least, I think I did. I don't know if she felt as strongly as I did about it."

Jak nodded, in some strange way knowing exactly what Torn meant. Everything was starting to get fuzzy now, and he was only half aware of himself when he asked his next question.

"So who is like, your perfect guy or girl then?" Jak asked.

So they were out looking for women. Wait; Jak had said guy or girl. Did that mean he suspected anything?

"Why?" Torn asked, hoping that Jak was drunk enough that he would reveal why they were in this bar.

"Because we need to get you laid," Jak said, laughing as he did so. "Preferably with the hottest chick in the universe, 'cause then you'll forget about me."

'…forget about me…' Jak knew!

It was no wonder if he was as obvious about it as Ashelin seemed to think he was. The most painful part about the discovery was not that Jak knew, but that he was attempting to push Torn away. He wanted Torn to forget about him, which could only mean one thing; Jak didn't want a relationship.

Perhaps I should get drunk… Torn thought sadly. No, he told himself. Just because Jak knew did not mean that Torn would not still attempt to be a good friend. After all, Jak hadn't completely shunned him.

Jak's vision was beginning to get blurry, as were his thoughts. There was something; something important that he needed to remember or be doing, but for some reason his memory didn't seem to be working as well as it had only a couple of minutes ago.

He blinked a couple of times; trying to focus on the person he knew was sitting just a little way away from him. Torn's face came into focus, and Jak smiled.

Torn. Torn was nice, Jak thought. He liked Torn.

A smile appeared on Jak's face for no reason that Torn could work out, but he was glad it was there, even if it was only because Jak was by now, undoubtedly drunk. Torn began to realise why it was the drinks were called Little Red Zoomers; because they got you drunk fast.

Jak's eyes shifted drunkenly to the bare dance floor behind them; a wicked gleam appearing in his eyes as he did so. Torn could tell the drinks had more than taken hold.

"Torn…" Jak murmured.

Torn had barely a second to wonder what could possibly be going through Jak's mind before he gelt an insistent hand tug on his own. Jak yanked Torn off the barstool and to his feet, dragging him onto the dance floor and away from the bar.

"Jak," Torn protested. "What are we doing?"

"Dancing," Jak answered. "'s been so long since I danced."

"I don't dance Jak," Torn objected, but his complaints fell on deaf ears. Jak continued to drag him out until they stood in the middle of the dance floor.

Torn wasn't sure what sort of dancing he expected, but it certainly wasn't this.

Jak's hands grabbed Torn's and pulled them down so that they rested comfortably around Jak's waist. Jak's hands then moved to wrap around Torn's neck.

This had to be the drink talking, Torn reasoned. This was only happening because Jak was drunk. There was nothing at all romantic about this situation.

Still, he couldn't help but dream.

The song changed just as Torn let his arms wrap a little tighter around Jak's waist. It wasn't the sort of song people would normally associate with slow dancing, but Torn couldn't imagine any other sort of dance that would fit it either. It wasn't a love song; not quite. It was more like a plea for comfort, for understanding, and for a life more complete.

Jak gazed into Torn's eyes, and Torn saw the exact same wish there. He was being asked for a type of love and comfort that he wasn't exactly sure he could give. He tried his best though, and let Jak's head rest against his shoulder.

Torn found himself singing the chorus very softly into Jak's ear, even though the lyrics weren't exactly the sort that would be much of a comfort. It seemed to be enough for Jak, who began nuzzling into Torn's neck; the alcohol having stripped away every ounce of control or emotional defence he had.

The song began to wind down, and Jak lifted his head off Torn's shoulder, looking into the taller man's eyes once more. Was that love or just the effects of alcohol he saw shining in Jak's eyes? Either way, there was still that pleading there, and Torn desperately wished he knew what to do to satisfy it.

There were no words to accompany the music anymore, just a soft thumping of percussion that Torn thought he felt echoed in his and Jak's heartbeats.

A split second of indecision registered on Jak's face, before Torn felt Jak's arms tighten around him. Jak pulled Torn's head down so that their lips met one another.

At first it was desperate; just Jak's lips pressing fiercely against his own, but then Torn opened his mouth a little, and began moving his lips slowly and lovingly against the younger male's, forcing Jak to be gentler.

Torn was just giving in the wonderful sensation when Jak's lips pulled away from his own. When his eyes fluttered open he saw Jak staring at him with the same hunger as before.

"Torn," Jak slurred. "I…"

That was all the blonde managed to say before the full effect of his three drinks took hold, and he passed out. His head flopped forward to rest on Torn's chest, and the older man was forced to take all of Jak's weight.

Torn just stood there for a moment, staring at the unconscious blonde in his arms. He had to get Jak back to the Naughty Ottsel so he could sleep this off.

It was going to be a long walk home.