Chapter four

Safe inside these walls

Man, did my head hurt. Damn shifting. Damn Paul. Damn EVERYTHING!

"Querida? Are you alright?" Don't damn Jesse PLEASE!!!!

My head was resting on his lap and my hand was securely held in his. It took me a minute to open my eyes. The pain inside my head was a nightmare. It hurt so bad I hesitated on opening my eyes for anything. But not Jesse. I would open them for him if I was near death.

When I finally held my eyes open, I looked up into his face. He looked worried. Frightened, even. When I didn't answer he looked worse with concern. "Susannah, Querida, are you alright? Say something!" His voice was frantic.

"Yeah, I'm fine." I tried to sit up, but my head hurt so bad I had to lay back down again. Not that I didn't want to. I could stay there all night with my head resting on Jesse. Well, lying next to each other would seem more comfortable. But, that's just me.

"Do you want to lay down? I could take you to your bed if you would be more comfortable." He said.

I tightened my grip on his hand.

"Please." And then he scooped me up. It was all romantic. Well, at least I didn't hit my head on anything.

I did have my fingers crossed.

He took me over to my bed and set me down gently, this time, and helped me under the covers. I felt so warm, and yet so, cold. Ok, I admit it, I was lonely. And I wanted that loneliness to go away.

"Jesse." He was still standing next to me. I scooted over to make a space, and then patted the emptiness for him to make un-empty. "Will you stay with me until I fall asleep?" Or all night? I wanted to say. Too bad I didn't have the guts to ask it.

He smiled. "If it will make you feel better, Querida, then I will." I pulled back the comforter. He hesitated, and for a minute I didn't think he was going to climb in. But, he must have seen the disappointment in my eyes, because he lifted up the comforter and climbed in.

Man, did I feel happy. Hell, I was ecstatic. He was laying in my bed, and was going to stay there until I fell asleep. Which, would be never. How could I? The man I was in love with was laying in my bed with me, watching me, making sure I was safe.

"Jesse." I mumbled.

"Yes, Querida."

"What does Querida mean?" I know, I KNOW! I already know that answer. But I want to hear him say it.

He didn't say anything. A short silence passed, when he leaned over, and kissed me.

Oh, man, what a kiss! His tongue didn't force itself inside my mouth the way Paul's had. He didn't even make me doing anything with my hands. He didn't ask. The kiss, I could tell, was passionate. He had to have felt something for me to kiss me like this. He had to. Right? I mean, you didn't go around kissing girls you didn't like. Right?

Well, I am the only girl he has been able to touch, and I'm the only girl who has ever seen him since he was alive, so the chances of him actually liking me, are like, small. Damn.

The kissed ended when he pulled away. He didn't jerk away or push me away like Paul had. My eyes fluttered open to see Jesse's. He was staring at me.

"Oh, God. Does my hair look like a rat?" I put my hands up to my head. Did I just refer to my hair as a rat? Bad, bad, Suze.

He laughed, and took my hands from my head and held them between us. We were laying on our sides, close to each other. "Your hair, is beautiful. It does not look like a rat, Susannah."

I let out a breath in relief. I smiled. Thank god, it didn't look like one. I would have to shove the pillow behind my head over my face. "Thank god."

"Querida, why do you worry about your hair so much?" Did he just ask that question?

"My hair, has a tendency, to get out of hand, now and then. It will go wild if I don't worry so I can fix it." He had on another one of those expressions I can not read. I hate those. He looks sexy and all, but I can never tell what he is thinking.

He reached up and ruffled my hair. Twirling a strand of my chestnut locks around his finger, I closed my eyes. I was taking in all that was happening. While he played with my hair, I silently thought. I'm not going to tell you what I thought because I don't want to go all rated R on you. It wouldn't be fair.

Soon, I was claimed by sleep. I had wonderful dreams. None of which I would like to discuss. They are all very… personal. Yeah, you read that right.

When I awoke, Jesse was still in my bed. His arms were now around me and I was snuggled deep into his chest. I was the most comfortable I had ever been. And I was lying next to the hottest man alive. Well, except for Johnny Depp. But, he isn't going to happen.

I yawned and carefully stretched. Jesse stirred and I could see that he was trying to see if I was awake. But before I could fake being asleep, he spotted my open eyes and smiled.

"You shouldn't fake it Susannah. You don't look the same. It wouldn't work on me." Oh, crap. So I guess all those other times I had been faking it, he knew? Great. Just, great. I am the biggest loser alive.

"I'm sorry. I just don't want you to move." He smiled. I love that smile. His lips, they are so delicious.

"I wasn't planning on doing so." Now I had to smile. He kissed my forehead, and was about to kiss me on the lips when we heard the floor creak.

Jesse pulled away and I saw behind him, stood the same guy from yesterday. But this time, something seemed off about him.

"Am I interrupting anything?" He asked, trying to look innocent that he hadn't been watching.

Jesse pulled away completely and stood up. I followed and stood beside him.

"Hi." I said, my voice low, almost a whisper.

"Hey." He replied. Something about him didn't seem right. He looked different. Sometimes ghosts send off certain vibes. And the one coming off of him was that of something bad.

"So, what have you been up to lately?" I asked conversationally.

"Not much. I visited some relatives. It kind of sucked since they couldn't see me. But It was cool how they all screamed when they saw paper cups being thrown up and down." He laughed.

Most ghosts were like this. They thought playing around with those who once knew them alive was funny. It made me sick. I couldn't imagine Jesse doing something like that. Although, he did sometimes take my CDs and not put them back. One day I walked into my room and found most of my CDs strewn along my floor.

"Sounds like fun." I said sarcastically.

At that moment, the phone rang. I strode over to my nightstand and picked up the contraption. An old voice came on the line and sounded out of breath.

"Susannah?" It was Father Dom.

Why was he out of breath? I don't think they have obstacle courses for the staff. Not that you could get any of the nuns to take off their outfits to run through tires. No, something was up. Father Dom never sounded like this when he called.

"Father D, what is it? Why are you out of breath?" I asked.

"Susannah, there has been several murders."

I dropped the phone.