Chapter 19: Denial and Breakage

She had become careless, often crossing a busy street without looking, and even when cars stopped mere feet from her and blew their horns in warning to Mayura, she ignored them. It was as if she had lost her instinct to survive. Not that she was looking for ways to kill herself; it was more like she was indifferent to the whole concept of life and death.

"Mayura-chan, what's going on? You've been wandering like a ghost for days. Ever since that one date you had with Freyr-san!" questioned an angry Skuld.

"What's going on?" Mayura rambled tonelessly. "I don't know…" Mayura slipped into a emotionless daze.

---Within Mayura's Head---

"Hello, Kaitou Freyr-san. Are you doing anything tonight?" asked Mayura flirtatiously.

"Yamato Nadeshiko! This Freyr… this Freyr is not worthy of your presence!"

"Not even for a date?"

"Whatever Yamato Nadeshiko commands…" responded a heart-eyed Freyr.

"Wow that was a close one… Kotaro-kun said he was busy and kept mumbling something about much Loki would hurt him and Narugami-kun wouldn't because he didn't want to hurt Loki," whispered a relieved Mayura.

"Are you ready to go? Freyr knows of the greatest place to take Yamato Nadeshiko."

Unfortunately for Freyr, Mayura was still lost in private thought. "But that's the point!" screamed Mayura.

"Yamato Nadeshiko… are you alright? Maybe today is not such a good day…"

"Oh, I'm sorry Freyr-kun… I was just thinking about something. Let's go!" said a cheerful Mayura.

"Freyr-kun…" whispered Freyr, once again back on cloud nine.

"I just have to forget Loki's kiss… Loki-kun's… Farbautisen-san's kiss. That kiss…" Mayura sighed.

"Freyr-kun…"

"Ah… Freyr-kun, are you ready to go?"

"Freyr-kun…"

"Kaitou-san!"

"Ah… yes Yamato Nadeshiko?"

"Let's go."

"Okay…"

"Snap out of it Mayura-chan!" commanded Skuld as she waved her hand in front of Mayura's face. "What happened on that date?! Neither of you are talking about it!" pestered Skuld once again.

"We kissed… well, I kissed him."

"And…? That wouldn't be enough to drive you over the deep end!" retorted Skuld.

"I would like to add that Freyr-san isn't acting like this Mayura-san… anymore." commented Verdandi.

"He's wasn't acting his normal cheerful self, but that's because he thought he hurt you somehow," added Urd.

"Not his normal self Urd? Heimdall-san had to take him shopping. Do you realize how serious that was?" asked Skuld.

"That is true…" responded the other two sisters.

"But Heimdall-san finally convinced Freyr-san that he didn't hurt his Yamato Nadeshiko," informed Verdandi.

"Mayura-san, why are you still so… gloomy? Even if you feel guilty about hurting Freyr-san's feelings…"

"It's not that…" interrupted Mayura.

"Is it the kiss you regret Mayura-san?" inquired Urd.

"Yes… no… I don't know."

"Tell us what you do know Mayura-chan… please…" begged Skuld.

"It was warm and pleasant… soft as anyone would image… And yet… and yet… it was cold, lifeless… And it hurt so much. I felt like a part of me was being ripped out. But I had to do it…"

"It?"

"I had to kiss someone else… To forget Loki's… Farbautisen-san's kiss…"

"Mayura-san/chan…"

"But I can't forget! It only made the memory of Loki's eyes before he kissed me… the memory of his smile… the memory of his lips as they touched mine… the memory of that surreal feeling… it was like I was becoming a flame… Loki… it only made the memory stronger!" ended Mayura as she collapsed onto the couch.

"Mayura-san why don't you take a nap on the couch," invited Urd, placing power behind her words.

"Thank you. I just feel so empty. Like I've lost something… something that was becoming a part of me… and now it's gone. I'll never get it back." Mayura cried as she started to fall asleep.

"You love Loki-sama, Mayura-chan."

"Loki… I love you Loki…" mumbled Mayura right before she lost consciousness to sleep.

Stepping outside the room Mayura was sleeping in the three sisters of fate were each lost in thought. Skuld was the first to break the silence. "What did she mean by that? What did she lose that was becoming a part of her? I don't understand."

"I don't understand that either, but when Mayura-san was talking about becoming a flame during Loki-sama's kiss, I don't think she meant that metaphorically," mused Verdandi.

"But that's nothing special Verdandi, I mean, that's just normal bodily reactions and such…" commented Skuld.

"You misunderstood me Skuld. She wasn't metaphorically describing the kiss. The impression I received from Mayura-san was that… I know this sounds absurd, but Mayura-san thought she literally was turning into a flame… I can't describe it any better… I…" stuttered a confused Verdandi.

"Urd, what do you think of all this?" asked the two younger sisters. "You relate with the past the best of the three of us."

"It's too fuzzy to tell… but from what I can see clearly enough…," Urd paused in deep concentration. "There was some sort of connection between Loki-sama and Mayura-san. A link you could say. Quite an old link too. But it's so faint… I can barely even see it," Urd paused once again. "If I had to guess I'd say it was about… six years old… right around when Loki-sama decided to stay on Midgard or just a little older…"

"What does that have to do with the current situation Urd?" asked Skuld.

Still concentrating Urd continued to speak, "It's so hard to see… too many emotions… the connection was strained six months ago… I… it's so blurry…"

"Please Urd, I have a feeling that this might be root of the problem."

"I'll try Verdandi. Let's sit down and let me use my crystal ball."

"I thought that was just for a joke Urd," replied Skuld.

"I know, but I find it helps me focus… silly as that sounds." Urd sat down and began to stare into the crystal. Her eyes slowly glazed over before she began to speak. "Even though everything is blurry, the link is stronger… Something happened two and a half weeks ago… the link's… it's become so frail and weak… almost like it was fading away or being destroyed…"

"Two and a half weeks ago was White Day when Loki-sama and Mayura-chan had that argument…" interrupted Skuld.

"It's so cloudy… I can't see… wait… four days ago… the connection snapped!" exclaimed Urd as she pulled out of her vision.

"What could have caused the link to snap Urd?"

"I don't know Skuld… I don't know. It's too hard to see with both Loki-sama's and Mayura-san's emotions clouding everything. It's like trying to see in thick fog."

"The kiss…"

"What do you mean Verdandi? What does the kiss have anything to do with it?" asked Skuld.

"That's what broke the link. Remember when Mayura-san said it felt like a piece of her was being ripped out? That something that was becoming a part of her disappeared? She didn't know what it was… but I think she was talking about the link between Loki-sama and herself."

"I still don't get it," answered a confused Skuld.

"It's like this… Loki-sama and Mayura-san's relationship wasn't doing very well at the time, causing this connection between the two of them to become stressed and very fragile. When Mayura-san kissed Freyr-san the link couldn't take the added stress and snapped."

"Ah… I get it now. But what is this link?"

"I've never seen it before Skuld, between humans, gods, or the occasional human/god pairing. I have absolutely no clue what this could mean. But I do know one thing. We need to see Loki-sama right away. If this connection thing is anything like I think it is…"

"What Urd?" asked Verdandi.

"If this connection thing is anything like I think it is… then Loki-sama won't be doing any better than Mayura-san."

Author's Note: What was that? Not going to tell. You'll find out eventually. Just remember Verdandi's discovery/confusion k? I promise it will be good.

To Melrose Stormhaven: Poor Reiya-chan. Completely losing the guy she loves. But that's the way love is sometimes. (Not that she had a chance) And yes, it's going to be a very long story.
Loki did a John Wayne last update. I took the idea from "The Quiet Man" one of John Wayne's few non-military non-cowboy movies. In the story John Wayne says "The only locks between us will be the ones inside your own thick head," kisses her and pushes/throws her onto the bed. He then goes out of the bedroom to sleep in his sleeping bag in the kitchen. (They had just gotten married but because the wife's brother didn't give the wife her dowry, she feels she not a married woman… etc…) (The movie takes place in 1910's Ireland.)

To LittleGreenWolf: Yeah, not the greatest attitudes for two love birds to have eh? They're great with the mood swings. Ah love…

To Manda-chan: Loki was just frustrated. After all that work, the mortal still didn't want him. If you were a god, knew that she loved you and had been reduced to wooing a mortal, wouldn't you be upset? And they're losing their will to live for a much bigger reason than relationship angst. It's because goaingaxmnvwhlawktsav… oops, can't tell. And not quite yet, but things will get better soon.

To Bibliomaniac: Thanks for the compliment. Loki wasn't as sappy when he wrote that one. Hehe… no kissy kissy yet. I told everyone that my beta swore I broke the angst-o-meter. Heim-kun is mentioned in ch. 20, but Heimdall's prank comes in chapter 24.

To Bibliomaniac: I don't know the real setting of the MaLoki manga or anime. I decided it would be Tokyo. They're definitely living in a Japanese city, and since I don't know where that aquarium is… probably gives the Japanese viewers the location like the Statue of Liberty or the Golden Gate Bridge would do for an American viewer. And yes, a happy ending. I'm a sucker for happy endings. Just how they got there is going to be rather interesting… and the end isn't what they would have expected.

To akuweaselgirl: Glad you like my story.

To Malster: In Japanese, calling your friend by their last name—especially how close Loki and Mayura were—is considered very insulting.

To Erinys: Their friends won't sit by. Don't worry. Oh this story has a very happy Loki/Mayura ending. Don't fret about that.

To Ytak: You'll understand why I posted these two chapters together as well. I'm glad my plot and characterization is coming out so well. Thank you. And yup, they get back together. I'm a sap at heart.